1. Jordan Schroeder
Professor Powell
ENC 3241
February 3, 2013
Comparing Prose and Readability
In order to evaluate the readability of a document one must analyze many things. Word
choice, sentence length, syntax and style are just a few of the many aspects to take in to a
account when doing so. In Jeff Terrance's "Content Conditioning and Distribution for Dynamic
Virtual Worlds" the sphere of virtual gaming is broken down and spoon fed to the reader while
pitching an idea for a revolutionary change to the entire system. In "The Art of Digital
Publishing: A foundation of combined standards to support the future of publishing" author
Daniel Lynch assesses the many values of digital publishing and its use as an educational tool.
Both pieces execute their prose well and get their point across but I believe Terrance's "Content
Conditioning" is the better piece for its adherence to "good writing" as detailed in The Essentials
of Technical Communication (Tebeaux 51).
While both authors excel at their craft, Terrance's greater use of simple language gives
him an edge from a technical communications standpoint. Terrance emphasizes on using
effective diction; short, easy to read and to the point. On the contrary, Lynch, at times, pens long,
incredible sentences with impressive diction. For example, "Many attempts and standards have
been introduced to standardize the transmission and display of scientific text, formulae, and
diagrams across the web" is a beautifully worded sentence but would provide a clearer message

2. with simpler language (Lynch 11). Lynch employs complex sentences as such often throughout
his dissertation which exemplifies his great style and cadence but is not necessary in technical
communication. Furthermore, both authors use a lot of field jargon which can be a good or bad
thing. Terrance makes mention of Metaverse, Sirikata and Space while Lynch speaks of HTML,
MathJAX, typesetting and much, much more. The only difference between the two author's use
of jargon is that Terrance simplistically explains these concepts while Lynch makes brief
mention before bringing up the next type format. I believe this discrepancy stems from a lack of
audience awareness from Lynch (Or, quite possibly, that I am not the intended audience). Lynch
seems to assume his audience knows a great deal about digital publishing so he does not go into
great detail explaining the functionality of each of the many programs/concepts he mentions.
Terrance, on the other hand, seemed to write his piece for a more general audience. Quickly after
first mentioning the Metaverse he begins to explain what it is: a 3D world that can be altered by
the user rather than the creator (Terrance 2). Without this explanation the reader would be left
clueless.
From a design standpoint I believe both authors are relatively equal. Terrance begins his
paragraphs with topic sentences that are the essence of the entire segment; an effective tool in
getting across main ideas. The first sentence of his introduction is "With the computer becoming
ever more powerful over time, applications which were previously never thought possible
suddenly became a reality" thus conveying his dissertation will delve into revolutionary, virtual
applications (Terrance 1). Lynch also employs solid topic sentences and starts his piece by
saying the gap between education and technology needs to be closed. This is, undoubtedly, the
main focus of the entire piece so Lynch's design can't be questioned. In fact, one could argue

3. Lynch's design may be better than Terrance's due to his inclusion of visual representation. The
images he shows serve twofold; one, as a way to make his information easier to digest and two,
as a testament to the educational techniques he is preaching throughout his dissertation.
Both writers have their fortes and pitfalls. Between the two, Lynch employs more style,
craftier syntax and a more refined cadence. In this excerpt, Lynch uses a quote to tie in to his
general message:
Donald Knuth, in his book "The Art of Computer Programming", said: "Science is what
we understand well enough to explain to a computer. Art is everything else we do". It is
the Art that allows us to bridge the gap for those that are interested, and that is the
expression at which this project strives. (Lynch 12)
While this is not an example of exceptional cadence or syntax I do find it to be an exemplar use
of style. The way he ties the quote into his piece is crafty and coincides with the title. This is also
one of many references Lynch's makes in his dissertation. Lynch has countless quotes, examples
and statistics cited in "The Art of Digital Publishing" which shows the reader Lynch really did
his research and knows the topic at hand. On the other end of the spectrum, Terrance is a near
polar opposite. He gives no examples or quotes in his first ten pages but rather relies on his own
knowledge breaking down the concepts of the Metaverse and other virtual entities. This is not a
knock on Terrance but a distinction from Lynch. While Lynch's fortes are style and research,
Terrance is masterful in getting his point across. His language is simple, his sentences are neither
too wordy or complex; as previously mentioned he relies on effective diction.

4. All in all, I find Jeff Terrance's "Content Conditioning and Distribution for Dynamic
Virtual Worlds" to be the more effective piece. From a telecommunications standpoint, Terrance
most effectively gets his point across by understanding his audience, being concise and carefully
selecting his words. Terrance is a fundamentalist, he wastes no time trying to impress the reader
with impressive diction or overly complex sentencing; he maintains focused on getting his point
across as effectively and in the least amount of words as possible.