4. Goals Shorten the length of time you have to spend with angry customers Reduce the intensity of their anger Reduce the stress
5. Why are People Angry Lip Service to Customer Service (CS) Lack of Investment in CS Frustrated people tend to be more aggressive Unreasonable expectations Expect the worst when they call
6. There is NO magic solution Talk includes numerous techniques Don’t memorize scripts and recite them
7. Personality vs. Situational Abusive customer behavior is situational People choose their emotional states You cannot control the emotions of another person Control how you react to their anger
8. Hostile Behavior Put you off balance Manipulate you Demean you Cause you to feel guilty Intimidate you
9. Verbal Abuse Swearing Yelling Sexist/racist comments Personal attacks Threats (e.g. I’ll have you fired) Accusations (e.g. calling you racist)
10. Angry People Adrenaline pumps Emotions get high Revert back to behavior learned earlier in life
11. Reaction Purpose of aggression is to control you We want to remove rewards for the bad behavior in question
12. Bait Behaviors designed to get you to react in an emotional way If you react, you hand control to the attacker
13. Customer: What the hell is wrong with you … Employee: Mr. Doe, you really sound upset about this Customer: Damn right I’m upset. What are you going to about this? Employee: I need some information from you so I can help. Can you give me your loan number?
14. Do Not Respond Defensively I only work here I try the best I can I am treating you fairly I know what I’m doing We don’t lose files
15. Do Not Counter-Attack You have no right to talk to me like that You don’t know what you are talking about I am going to hang up It’s too bad your parents didn’t teach you manners
16. Defensive behavior and counter-attacks are what the angry customer expects They are natural responses, but almost always make things worse
17. What Do They Want Their problem fixed (which is unlikely since you can’t make their debt go away) Want you to be helpful, even if you can’t solve their entire problem
18. People Want Choices “I’m sorry, Mr. Lewis is away from his desk. Can I take a message and he can call you back?” “I’m sorry, Mr. Lewis is away from his desk. Would you like him to call you back at a particular time, or would you prefer to call again after 2pm when he is available?”
19. Acknowledgement as Individuals Each person feels their situation is unique and special Acknowledging that a person is upset will help to calm them down Common mistake is to ignore the feelings being expresses and shift into problem-solving Customers perceive a move to problem-solving as uncaring and unfeeling
20. Sense of Equality We want to be treated as individuals We don’t want to receive less than other customers
21. Escalation If the customer is not treated in a way that helps them feel important and listened to, the customer gets more abusive Employee over-reacts, in turn increasing anger of caller Tactics we discuss are for diffusing this early on
28. Deal with the Feelings First Empathy Acknowledge the person’s upset
29. Avoid being a Bureaucrat Avoid formal language “It’s against our policy…” “Let me explain how we usually do things. We ask that you…”
30. Every Person/Situation is Different Strive to control the interaction Begin defusing early Be assertive, not aggressive or passive If you lose control of your emotions, you lose
31. Every Person/Situation is Different Don’t supply ammunition (e.g. sigh, mutter) Don’t ask questions you don’t want answers to Avoid high risk, high gain behavior Telling someone to be quiet or humor… great when they work but can backfire
32. Avoid Losing Your Cool Identify your triggers Slow down your response Positive self-talk Put on their shoes
33. Use Cooperative Language Instead of “We always send out this information to customers” “We usually send out this information…” “It’s odd you didn’t receive the information”(invites discussion without pinning responsibility on customer) “Perhapsit’s just gotten lost somewhere” (perhaps is another less absolute word)
34. The Use of “We” “We” suggests cooperation But don’t overdo “I guess we’d better take a look at that” “Let’s see what we can do about that”
35. Avoid Contentious Words & Phrases Customer: You wouldn’t treat me this way if I wasn’t green, you just don’t like green people Employee: Your race doesn’t affect how I treat you. We deal with lots of green people here Employee : Your BACKGROUND doesn’t affect how I treat you. We deal with people from EVERY WALK OF LIFE
36. Contentious Words & Phrases Ethnic background Blame (if you paid attention, obviously you haven’t) Absolutes (always, never) Suggest helplessness (there is nothing I can do) Suggest disinterest (I’m not interested in, that has nothing to do with)
37. I can’t We always You must have You can’t Don’t You’re wrong I don’t think I can We try to Is it possible that I don’t think that is going to help you It might be better if you Is it possible that
38. Questions “Do you know how fast your were going?” Less likely to provoke a person vs. a statement Allows officer to assess your state Asserts control over the interaction
39. The When Question Customer: You don’t give a damn about me. You have some nerve telling me I can’t… Employee: When did you start thinking that we aren’t concerned with your situation?
40. Person expects defense (I / we statements) or counterattack (you) If they respond to your question, you have gained control of the interaction When did you start feeling (or thinking) that [rephrase a part of what the person said in a non-inflammatory way]
41. Topic Grab Taking something the person has said, commenting or asking a question about it Temporarily distracts and returns the conversation to a more calm tone
42. Example Customer: What the hell do you expect me to do now. What kind of idiot are you? I have a family to support. The bank is going to take my home. How am I supposed to feed my kids, what are they… Employee: It must be frustrating Mr. Smith. How old are the kids?
43. Customer: Umm 5 and 7. Why do you ask? Employee: Well I have kids around that age too. I know how difficult it is to worry about them. Let me explain what you can do, so at least you will know your options. Customer: It isn’t fair Employee: Some people think it is unfair. Let me explain what you can do next, OK?
44. Broken Record Client not paying attention Repeat 1 or 2 short sentences until the person starts to hear you Choose language that shows you are willing to help and that you are concerned
45. Customer: [talks on and on] Employee: Mr. Smith, it is frustrating. Let me explain what you can do Customer : [talks on and on] Employee : I know you’re frustrated. Let me explain what you can do Customer : [talks on and on] Employee : It’s frustrating. Can I explain what you might do next?
46. Customer: Damn right it’s frustrating. Employee: It is. What you might do next is…
47. Silence When the customer asks if you are still there it provides an opportunity to reassert control Acknowledge customer’s feelings
48. Customer: Why are people so inefficient? I called the bank six times and each time I get told the same thing… what’s wrong with them… I am sick and tired… Employee: [Says nothing, making sure not to say words like “yes” or “uh huh”] Customer : Hello, are you still there? Employee : Yes, and I know you are frustrated. I will help you if you give me your name.
49. Customer: It’s Mr. Smith Employee: Thank you Mr. Smith. Now, if I understand, you are upset because you… Can I ask you a few questions to help us get to the bottom of this? Customer: OK
50. Allow Venting If you constantly interrupt the message you are sending is you aren’t listening When they start to wind down acknowledge their feelings to prove you are paying attention Then refocus and problem-solve
52. Empathy Statements Show employee understands the situation Nothing to show that employee agrees with the customer
53. Examples It must be frustrating. It sounds like you’re pretty annoyed You must feel like you’re getting the run around It must be pretty difficult to make ends meet It must seem like these things take forever
54. Avoid “I” Focuses the feelings on you Run the risk of providing ammunition Employee: “I understand how frustrating this is for you” Customer: “How could you possibly understand?”
55. Do not use the word “but” I realize you’ve been waiting a long time, but all these people were in front of you I realize you’ve been waiting a long time. [pause] There are a number of other people who have been here quite a while.
56. Referring to Supervisor Tend to treat people who we think have status and power with more respect Who says it often makes a difference Far more powerful if you offer it rather than waiting for customer to demand it
57. Disengaging Short time only! Consult a colleague Consult with supervisor Check policy or laws Check file/computer
58. Listening Responses Proves you are listening Helps clarify the situation So, if I understand you correctly, you’re saying that … Is that correct? I want to make sure I understand. Are you saying that …
60. Steps Define the customer’s problem State your own requirements/ limitations Share information Explore alternatives Agree on course of action Follow-thru
61. Define the Problem Identify the root cause Must be calm enough to focus on the problem and to listen If not, control-acknowledge-refocus
62. Provide Information Customer needs to know: What you can and can’t do Why you can’t do what is desired Benefits of rules and procedures
63. Helpful Phrases “Sir, let me explain what I can and cannot do for you” “Were you aware that our job is to ___” “Perhaps nobody has taken the time to explain the situation to you. Let me try”
64. Create Agreement Ask questions guaranteed to get agreement “I’m sure you want to settle this as quickly as possible, right?” “I agree that the process seems to take a long time. I am sure you would agree that your priority is to get this fixed.”
65. Offer Alternatives Offer suggestions about what you can do, in addition to what the client can do
68. Assertive Limit Setting Decide based on: Failure of gentler defusing techniques The person’s behavior
69. Limit Setting Define behaviors that are unacceptable A request (implied) to change those behaviors Indicate consequences Question that gives the customer a choice
70. “Sir, if you continue to swear and yell, we will have to end our conversation. Would you prefer to continue or stop?”
71. “Would you like to continue or stop now? It is up to you whether we continue. We can continue if you stop [behavior], or you can call some other time.”
72. Enforcing Limits Reference the limits previously stated A request to comply with the consequence An offer for further help
73. “Sir, I explained to you that I won’t continue this conversation if you continued to yell. I am ending this discussion now, but you are welcome to call back some other time.”
74. Don’t say, “You are welcome to call back when you calm down.”
77. Seven Drivers of Customer Happiness Know me, remember me… since I know a lot about you! Give me choices… that make sense for me Help me be better, do more… and become part of my fabric Don’t bother me… with spurious stuff Surprise me… I can’t imagine all that’s out there Listen to me… I have a bunch of good ideas, too Make it easy for me… to do business with you
78. 1. Know me, remember me - Amazon “personalized” intro, with relevant recommendations based on past searches, purchases, and “customers like me” easy access to my Cart, my Account, and Help
83. 2. Give me choices - “click to call” customer lands on “high value page”, “dwells” too long in Help, or at checkout ... and is stuck but he gets box inviting him to get call from CS immediately or when it’s convenient for him system sends web log data to agent, skipping general “how can I help you --> shorter handle time + higher conversion rate + more satisfied customers
99. Angry Customers & CustomerHappiness, Sources and Inspirations Bacal, Stop Angry, Hostile Customers Cold; CreateSpace, 2011 Dixon, Freeman & Toman, “Stop Trying to Delight Your Customers”; HBR, July-August 2010 Fornell, The Satisfied Customer: Winners and Losers in the Battle for Buyer Preference; Palgrave MacMillan, 2007 Gilbert, Stumbling on Happiness; Alfred A. Knopf, 2006 Good Experience; http://www.goodexperience.com/ (old blog led by Mark Hurst) Hsieh, Delivering Happiness: A Path to Profits, Passion and Purpose; Business Plus, 2010 Peters, The Pursuit of Wow! Every Person's Guide to Topsy-Turvy Times; Vintage, 1994 Price & Jaffe, The Best Service is No Service: How to Liberate Your Customers From Customer Service, Control Costs and Keep Them Happy; Wiley/Jossey-Bass, 2008
Editor's Notes
Stop bringing nasty customers home with youCustomer service, marketing, and reputation management are converging into one because everyone now has a voice…Think social mediaThe medium alters the messageDifferent messages are needed for different media
Expectations fed by companiesLook upon CS as a cost, rather than investment Reduce # of employees Automated call centers Supervisors/managers w/ authority to help customer are overworkedTaught if complain long enough you’ll get your way (don’t have a receipt, no problem)
Customers can tell when you are talking to them as a human being and when you aren’t
How many of you have ever flicked someone off? Yelled at someone?Although it doesn’t feel this way to them
Pushing the buttons of service staff, trying to make it more likely they will do something to make the situation worse
Comment about your competencyPeople are more abusive in telephone conversations – don’t see the person, just a disembodied voiceAlso means you have to adopt a stronger tone than you would in person to control the conversation (can’t use non-verbal tactics to control)
Have you noticed that adults that are hostile and aggressive often behave like small children?Reversion just happens, it isn’t consciousTakeaway: People react to their internal states, not to you personally
Refuse to be controlled, and refuse to react the way your attacker wishes, you will be a good way toward stopping the attack
It’s all bait, I’m angry
Defensive statement almost always have the word “I” or “we” in them.
Counter-attacks almost always contain the word “you” or is implied (I am going to hang up)
Ever been to a department store, couldn’t find an item, then finally find a staff member and they say, “Don’t know, that isn’t my department.” Infuriating, but you are no worse off than you once were. It is psychological, the employee is saying “you don’t mean squat to me.”Alternatively, “I don’t know, but if you wait a moment I can find out.”Think Zappos pizza ordering storyTell Lowe’s wood cutting example
Offering choices, no matter how small, goes a long way to making a customer feel valuedReduces their own sense of helplessness
Need to convey that you are treating the person as an individual with individual needs and wants while at the same time conveying that they are not receiving less than someone else in the same situation
Goal 1: Gain Control of the Interaction
If you have to keep explaining the same thing over and over, or continues to interrupt, customer isn’t ready to deal with problems
“When you yell at me, I feel upset. I would like you to stop yelling, or I am going to end our conversation.” They are concerned with their own feelings.
“When you yell at me, I feel upset. I would like you to stop yelling, or I am going to end our conversation.” They are concerned with their own feelings.
Common triggers - Tone of voice, whining, yelling, sarcastic, swearing, comments (racist, sexist) suggestions (incompetent, lazy) Count to 2 or three and/or take a deep breath before respondingNegative self-talk (why does this person hate me.. I don’t have to put up with this…) They aren’t really angry at me (only the situation), I’m better than them, I won’t stoop to their levelNavy SEAL training – goal setting, positive self-talk, arousal control (slow breathing)
Can also refer to a co-worker “an expert on staff that deals with your situation quite often”Also to an outside source (the lender), best if it can be an actual person rather than just a contact phone number
Just like one gives children timeoutsGives them time to reflect on their behavior
Remove hot words and harsh language
If it is possible to explain rules and the benefitsEveryone pays taxes, part of those taxes go to student loans, you would not want everyone defaulting and not paying you back
Make suggestions, we feel helpless when interacting with rules, this can lead to hostility. Choices gives us a sense of control
Be specific in describing behaviors (do not say, unless you calm down)Must be prepared to enforce consequencesChoice means customer chooses the consequence – if the customer feels you are punishing with power she will respond with increased force. With more control, customer is less likely to be aggressive
Could say “I would appreciate it if you would stop yelling”However, beginning with “I” you are focusing on your own motives, customer is not interested in what you appreciate
Saying “I warned you” sounds like a threat
It is patronizing, as is:You are welcome to call back when you get a gripYou are welcome to call back when you smarten upYou are welcome to call back if you act responsibly