1. I feel on top of the world, and I don’t know if it is because of the lack of sleep, or the over
abundance of excitement, but suddenly I realized, that the only true path to happiness is paved
with hard work and sacrifice. Let us all take for a moment a little trip down memory lane.
When the earth was still young and my young heart was aching, there was this little thing
which made the ultimate sacrifice, choosing between the old and the new. I have wondered
the world, oblivious to the truth. And the repercussions were as dark as a Jamaican’s butthole
And let it be known, through out far and wide, that the new Baron of Macabre is chilling with
some good old fashioned Led Zeppelin, who by the way is the only person I was truly envious
of. Well that, and spending too much time at home.
Recently I have felt the iron boot of my marital obligations, filtering my very insides. Leave
me be, beleaguered beast, for I have the know-how to stop you evil sway. Who I am
fooling…
The only reason I invited my mother-in-law over for brunch, was so we can talk about her
will, but as it turns out she was here to stay on a let’s say /permanent/ vacation. Old bad still
had a couple of million tucked away for rainy days. But hey, if she kicks the bucket know I be
swimming in the big leagues. Going to parties, shagging beautiful women, powdering you
nose and the such. Oh boy I tell you, I will wipe her ass for ten years if that’s what it takes to
catch her sweet, sweet money.
But I have to be honest with you. There is nothing more pathetic, than an evil old sea witch
screaming at you at 7 in the morning. I would have beaten her with a bat a long time ago, but
my wife has seemed to take a shine to her, being her daughter and all. I swear everything she
does, put’s me out of pace, but with her money to be happy first you have to race. The store,
to the bank
Worry not, for soon you’ll be dancing on her grave.
I have a killer liver. It can stand a hundred bottles bourbon,
And I will take 100 words to curve my shots while this beat I am serving.
Sorry, I gave it a little poetry there, or something, I don’t know. It is the same bullshit over
and over again, that woman is going to drive me insane. And this time I mean my actual wife.
She has been riding me about building an add-on to the house. Build a den for the snoring
beast, and a cage!
But life is like that sometimes. We forget that we are all people, and people must forgive
people for the same sake, a doctor will treat you if you have a terrible illness (or itching), yes
people who have guessed it, it is the power of disposable income. You will say, OK /you/ tell
us, why have to taken this blog hostage, tormenting us all with your incisive ramblings? And I
will say see you next wee folk, best wishes etc. etc.