How to break the uniform habit.

1. Unity,NOT uniformity
Introduction:
Inside a“Closed”HighSchool Clique from90’sTV
KeyTerms:
Unity-People lovingeachotherdespite differencesandissues
Uniformity-Peopletryingtobe like everyone else,expectingpeople tobe the same forthemto love
them.If people are different,theyare castoff.
Thisproblemisrootedinour desire forrelationshipandourdesire foridentity,security,andfulfillment.
How uniformityisafailedattemptatunity:
1. It createsa false sense of relationship.Whentwopeopleare onlyfriendsbecause theybothlike
Civil WarHistoryfor example,theirrelationshiponlyisdefinedbythat.Whenthingsgettough,
theirhouse of cards fallstothe ground.
2. It chopsoff the head.Ittriesto geteveryone toagree or be like somethinginordertohave
some sort of unity.Itis a form of control since onlyJesuscanunifyandbring peace.Jesusisthe
headof the church,and onlyJesuscan bringtrue unitythroughfaithinHim.
3. It isa formof diabolical control where onesloseswhotheyare forthe sake of the group.
Psychologistscall itgroupthink,whereone refusestomentiontheirownideasinfearof the
group.Everyone submitstoa headandpeople begintoworshiptheminsteadof God.If people
do notthinkor believe the waytheydo,theygetputout.
4. It keepspeoplefromhavinggoodrelationshipsdue toahuge self wall. Whenwe onlythink
aboutourselvesandhowpeople canbenefitus,we fall intothe uniformitytrapof only
befriendingthose inacertaintheological camp,orwhowearsa certainpairof shoes,orwho
likesacertainsportsteam.Sure,God made us all differentandinordertoconnect,there hasto
be commonality,butpartof spiritual maturityisbeingable toconnectwithpeople whoare
differentthanus.We needtobe careful whowe connectwith,butnot everyone will be intothe
same thingswe are intoandbelieve the same way.We needtoembrace diversity,andlove
people forwhotheyare,notfor whattheycan give us.
5. It increasesconflict.Whenwe expectpeople tolove uswithoutfault,there isaproblem.
Anotherformof uniformityisexpectingeveryone tobe ourbestfriendandlove usperfectly.
Whenwe are onlyinrelationshipsunlessthere isaconflict,we will movefromfriendtofriend
until we runout of people. Noone willneverletusdownorlove us perfectly. Grow upandlearn
to make allowancesforpeople’sfaultsandforgive others. Whenwe tryto getotherpeople to
like usand be our friend,itcancreate conflictas well.Whenwe tryto getothersto be like us,it
createsconflict. Whenwe expectpeople toserve usandrespectus,it createsconflict.Only
throughJesuscan one serve others.

2. How to walkinunitywithothers
1. Love people despite differences,socialcircles,etc.Godcallsusto love ourneighborasourselves
and Jesusmade itclearby the Good Samaritanillustrationthatitispracticallyanyone.We will
not be able to connectwitheveryone,butwe canserve otherswithlove. Despite if we are
friends,bestfriends,acquaintances,notfriends,etc,we are to show God’slove tothem.Saved
people serve people.
2. Love people forwhoGod made themto be.God doesnotmake us all the same.So appreciate
and love everyoneforwhotheyare.Forintimacywithothers,itdoestake commonalityanda
commonbond,but love strengthensanyrelationship.There issome uniformitythere,butwe
are to love people forwhoGodmade themtobe,insteadof how we want themto be and how
theycan be to us.
3. Love people regardlessof conflict anddifferences.Withintimacyandrelationships,therewillbe
conflict.Ihave not hada relationshipwhereIdidnothave some conflict.Tensionisnot
necessarilyabadthingand howwe handle itdeterminesourmaturityinthisarea.Make
allowancesforpeoplesfaultsandonlyexpectGodtolove youunconditionally. Evenif the
personisa Calvinist,youstill have tolove them.Evenif they are black,white,Hispanic,Asian,
etc,we still have tolove them.Whethertheyare male,female,old,young,rich,poor,we still
have to love them.WhethertheylikeWalkingDeadorBreakingBad,love them.Whatever
differencestheyhave,rememberthat Godcreatedthemso show honorto themby lovingthem
the way Jesuswantsusto love them. Noone is“too different”toenjoyrelationshipswith
others.We can all have somethingtoconnectonand show love andcare to them.Remember,
love iswhatconnects people,despite difference andsimilarities.Justlove peopleif youwant
friends.
4. Love people regardlessof their“issues”.Nothingdestroysunitythangossip,slander,malice,
bitterness,etc.Whenyouconnectwithpeople,youconnectwiththeirissues.Itall comesdown
to howwe see ourselves.Whenwe know we are sinnersinneedof Jesus,andreceivedGod’s
forgiveness,thenwe canshowthatsame love to othersas we expectthemtodoto us. Christian
maturityislovingpeople nomattertheirissues, makingallowancesfortheirfaults. Itcanbe
hard to love someone whentheyare insin,orif theyhave a certainstruggle,butwithGod’s
grace and love,we canserve andlove them.Praythat God will give youaheartto serve and
love those nomattertheirdifferencesandstruggles.Andstoptryingtofix othersandstraiten
everyone out.LetGodbe the potter.Itis easyforme to do this,whenwe needtoallow Godto
do hisworkand not try to getpeople toplease ourappetites.
5. Make everythingabout Jesus.We are to do everythingforthe gloryof God. LetJesusbe the
forefrontandserve otherswithhislove because of whathe hasdone foryou.Die to yourself,
take up yourcross and followJesusChrist.WhenJesusiscentral,we cangetpast ourselvesand
relate tootherswell.Ihave Asperger’sandIam still able todothis.We can allow people tobe
whoGod made themto be andavoidmuch conflictdoingso.We do not expectpeople to
believeeverythingwe believe andgetoffendedif theydon’tand we donot expectpeople to
cater to our desiresbutrespecttheirwishesanyways.We donothave to have people signa
card for themto believewhatthischurchbelieves,buthave themfollow Christ.AsBobGoff
wouldsay,“Live forJesus30 secondsat a time”.It’snot aboutus andwhat we want,but God
and whathe wants.

3. Whenwe get pastour ownappetitesforuniformity,we canlive inunitywithothersandhave peace
withothers. We can grow to ChristianMaturity,lovingGodandlovingothers.OnlythroughChristcan
we achieve unitywithourchurchand withunbelieverssince Christisourlife (Col 3:4) andwe live for
him(2 Cor 5:15).