This document provides information on handling temper tantrums and shyness/dependency in children. It discusses the causes and signs of temper tantrums and shyness, as well as tips for parents on how to address each issue. For temper tantrums, the document advises parents to remain calm, avoid arguing with the child, and not give attention to tantrum behaviors. For shyness, it suggests not pressuring children to socialize but instead preparing them and praising their social interactions. The document also includes examples of parent-child situations and dos and don'ts for parental responses.

1. PATHFINDER GLOBAL SCHOOL,
PATAUDI
By: Mr. Divyashu Sharma
School Counsellor
pgscounsellor@gmail.com

2. Workshop at a Glance
 Introduction
 Temper Tantrums
 Causes of Temper Tantrums
 Handling Temper Tantrums
 Shyness/ Dependency
 Causes of Shyness/ Dependency
 Handling Shyness/ Dependency
 Parents talk
 Do say and Don’t say
 Tips to handle

3. Introduction
 Personality is a dynamic organisation of any
individual.
 Consist of lot of aspects, overall constitutes a
behaviour.
 Behaviour is sum of beliefs, attitude, values etc.
 Behaviour characteristics start developing from child
hood.
 Parents face lots of problem while dealing with their
child.
 Here discussing two opposite attitudes: Temper
Tantrums v/s Shyness/ Dependency.

4. TEMPER TANTRUMS
 Angry outbursts…. Rolling on the
ground, screaming, kicking, throwing
objects, hitting.
 Common in children between 18
months to 3 years or may prolong.

5. CAUSES
 Child is denied what he demands.
 Poor role models.
 Gaining attention.
 If taken something what is wanted.
 Stopping to do the thing s/he is interested
in.
 Fatigue, hunger, thirst or loss of sleep.
 Inconsistent parents behaviour.
 Satisfying demand.
 To do something s/he is forced.

6. HANDLING TEMPER TANTRUMS
 Distract attention to an interesting object.
 In public, handle the situation as you would but if alone
without being conscious of others observing.
 Keep calmand appear balanced even if you are upset.
 Ignore the child and continue doing your work
 Be firm on your decisions.
 If the child become destructive hold , hold him firmly till he
becomes calm.
 Do not argue, shout, hit or reason with the child.
 Avoid giving negative or positive attention to tantrums.

7. HANDLING TEMPER TANTRUMS cont…
 Show affection and make the child understand when
the child calms down.
 Welcome the child with open arms after tantrums
stops.
 Show lack of interest and indifference to tantrums.
 Avoid situations that give rise to tantrums.
 Do not say “NO” to the child unless its absolutely
necessary. Give him / her other options s/he can try.

8. SHYNESS/ DEPENDENCY
 Feel anxious on their own.
 They need emotional support and
closeness of an adult.
 Holding clothes, thumb sucking, nail
biting, demanding approval for every
event.
 Not comfortable with company of
others.
 Faces trouble forming relationship.

9. CAUSES
 Less chances to meet people or
less interact with them.
 Insecurity / lack of confidence.
 Overprotection.
 Criticizing / criticism of - child in
front of others.

10. HANDLING SHYNESS/ DEPENDENCY
 Avoid calling the child “SHY”.
 Do not force the child to interact.
 Don’t make him/ her feel guilty.
Accept as it is.
 Listen to the child carefully.
 Prepare the child for the upcoming
events.
 Practice and role play non- shy
behaviour.

11. HANDLING SHYNESS/ DEPENDENCY Cont…
 Give the child freedom to explore,
experiment , and create.
 Let him find his/ her own way to tackle
problem in acceptable limits.
 Encourage the child to discuss his/her
problem.
 Make positive comments and
compliments.
 Don’t tease or mimic him/ her.

12. HANDLING SHYNESS/ DEPENDENCY Cont…
 Don’t overreact or reinforce shyness
by paying too much attention.
 Don’t over protect the child.
Welcome other children to visit and
play .
 Allow him/ her develop meaningful
relationships with other children /
adults.

13. HANDLING SHYNESS/ DEPENDENCY Cont…
 Give affection and attention to
make him/ her secure.
 Indulge the child’s name in
story/rhyme.
 Give responsibilities.
 Provide him /her with successful
and satisfying activities.

14. CASE 1:
“ My three year old son, Anshul’s temper
tantrums are like sudden rains which are
intense. Just few days ago, we both were
in DTC bus and moving towards shadra
and the next minute , Anshul starts
screaming loudly because I have not given
him the ticket to play which was in my
hand. I thought it was best not to yell at
him. I got out from the bus with my son
and waited for him to calm down. ”-Shobha , 35.

15. CASE 2:
“My 7 years old son , Pawan, played with
other children but don’t interact because he
was very shy. One day he told me that he
want to remain in his room by latching
himself there. He was very obedient and
never argued. I want him to be more
interactive with others so, I brought tons of
toys. He will get a toy when he will talk to any
new person in a day- meanwhile he began
talking with his classmates and started
developing close relationships.”- Rajesh,38.

16. Temper Tantrums Shyness/Dependency
DO SAY DO SAY
I know you are angry. I
will listen to you when
you cool down.
Let’s show the
children your new toy/
doll.
DON’T SAY DON’T SAY
I am ashamed of you. There’s nothing to be
scared of! Go and play
with others.

17. TIPS
 Make a positive behaviour contract
with the child. If he does not show
tantrums for 2 days/ a week/, he/ she
would be taken for an outing/ or get
something he desires.
 Teach positive talk- let child repeat
saying good things about himself/ her
self. eg. I can jump 3 stairs, I am good
in cooking etc.