2. Contents: A few Things to Come
Men’s Power and Control
Emotional and Economic Abuse, Violence
Common Reactions to Experiencing Violence
WHY DO WOMEN STAY? – My favorite part of
this chapter
Being Battered
Increasing Safety
Rape
Protecting Ourselves
3. Power and Control: “ Violence against women is about power
and control. It is rooted in the power imbalances that exist between
men and women.”
Intimidation
Verbal attacks
Isolation
Minimizing, Denying, and Blaming
Using loved Ones
Abusing Authority
Economic Control
Coercion and Threats
4. Common Reactions to Experiencing Violence: Most Women who have
experienced being raped, battered, sexually harassed, abused as a child, robbed
violently or hurt by others experience trauma.
Some Common Reactions to Trauma : Regaining Our Lives:
First step is to realize that it is not
Self-blame with feelings of shame and
guilt your fault. A woman needs to have
Fear, terror, and feeling unsafe the mindset of “We did not ask to
be hurt and violated, and we did not
Anger and rage
deserve it.
Substance Abuse
Eating disorders
“I made the best choice I was able
Self-Harm
to. I may have had to make life or
death decisions before, during, and
Isolation
after the assault.
Flashbacks and Nightmares
Dissociation
There is no right way to feel or heal.
All women take different paths to
Changes in sexuality and intimacy
healing, and we must respect the
Spiritual crisis
choices each survivor makes.
Loss of control, powerlessness
A woman deserves support. Try to
reach out to a family member,
friend, clergy member, or counselor
to help provide support.
A woman needs to give herself time
to heal.
5. WHY DO WOMEN STAY?
“I have been threatened when he's had a bad day and when he's had a good day.”
A common question asked to woman who are
battered is “Why do you stay?
A woman may feel trapped or unable to leave.
A woman still feels love for her partner
A woman may be physically prevented from
leaving
May not be able to support children on their own
A woman may not mentally be able to imagine a
future or life without pain or fear.
May rely on abuser as a caregiver.
6. ~Prevention~
What YOU can do if you are Safety Planning:
being battered: Call the National Domestic
Stay as calm as possible Violence Hotline ( 1-800-799-
Try to shield yourself, SAFE )
especially your head and Become familiar with your
stomach state’s laws and legal policies
If you are able to and if it
Build a support network
will not put you at a greater Learn and watch for warning
risk, call 911 and get signs
emergency assistance Teach your children how to
call for emergency assistance
Do the best you can to end Prepare a safety plan
the attack with the least
amount of injury.
7. Warning Signs
Emotional/ Economic Abuse: Acts of Violence:
Destructive criticism/verbal Making angry gestures
attacks Destroying objects
Intimidation/ pressure attacks Threatening to hurt you or
Dominating you others
Disrespect/ putting you down Sexual violence
Overly Jealous Physical violence
Lying Use of weapons
Blaming you for everything
Abusing drugs and alcohol
Controlling all the money
Preventing you from getting or
keeping a job
8. Increasing Safety while in the Relationship
Carry important phone numbers
for yourself and your children;
keep cell phone handy.
Find someone to tell about the
abuse. Ask neighbors to call
police if they hear sounds that
indicates violence
Think of four places you can go
If you need to leave where the
abuser can not track you down
Get specific items ready to take
if you leave
Rehearse an escape route
Periodically review your safety
plan.
9. Rape
Rape, also called sexual assault, is Rape Examinations
any kind of sexual activity committed
against someone's will. A verbal history of the sexual assault
Rape is a legal term and is defined and related medical concerns
slightly differently in each state. Most
state laws define rape in terms of
penetration with the use of force and A pelvic exam
without the persons consent.
The National Violence Against Examination and treatment of any
Women Survey reports that almost 18 external injuries
percent of women said they have
been the victim of a completed or
attempted rape at some point in their
Treatment for prevention of sexually
life. transmitted infections
When we are raped, survival is our
primary instinct and we protect Treatement for prevention of
ourselves as best as we can. pregnancy
Information about AIDS/HIV
A follow-up exam
10. Protecting Ourselves and Each Other from Rape
Safety in Social Situations: Pay attention to how you feel with
a person, if you are uncomfortable then say so.
Safety in Intimate Relationships: Learn to recognize
potentially abusive relationships.
Safety at Home: Make sure entrances are well lit and
windows and doors are securely locked, use only your last
name on your mailbox.
Safety in your Neighborhood: Arrange to walk home with
people you trust.
Safety on the street: Be aware of what is going on around
you. Avoid groups of men on public transportation and avoid
hitch-hiking.
Calling for Help on the Highway: Usually dial 911 which will
connect you to emergency services. If not then #77 or *77
will connect you.
11. Conclusion
I pretty much agree with all the information that this chapter had to
offer, I don’t see many people disagreeing with how violence
and abuse should be handled.
I felt that there was great information made available in this chapter
and was very clear on how to stay safe and protect yourself and
your loved ones.
If there was one thing that I would somewhat disagree with, is that
an abuser could also be woman to woman to; doesn’t not
always have to be a male abuser or rapist.
One piece of information that struck me the most was the quote on
page 118, “ Almost 1 out of 4 women in the United States has
been raped, physically assaulted by current or a former spouse,
living partner, boyfriend, or date.” This I find very striking that
almost 25% of our population has been sexually assalted and I
believe people need to keep a better eye out for keys and clues
in which this chapter has to offer.