Marriage in the 21st century faces new complexities from the speed of modern life and lack of patience, as well as unrealistic expectations. Problems include lack of role models, entitlement mentality, and lack of privacy. However, the Quran teaches that marriage's purpose is to find tranquility through love and mercy between spouses. Three key concepts are stillness (absence of disruptions), love (showing appreciation), and mercy (responding well to bad with good), qualities that help maintain a tranquil marriage.

1. Marriage
In the 21st century

4. So what’s new?
1. Complexity of life & surfeit of information
2. Speed of response
3. Lack of patience & tolerance
4. Unreal expectations from the spouse
Material possessions said to define happiness

5. Problems of Modern Marriages
1. Lack of positive role models
2. Entitlement mentality
3. Instant gratification – instant visibility
4. Lack of privacy – intrusive communication
Death of grandparenting– delink from culture & tradition

9. But what remains the same is…

10. Room 30: 21. And among His Signs is that He created for you
spouses from among yourselves, that you may find tranquility
in them, and He has put between you love and mercy. Verily, in
that are indeed signs for people who reflect.
ْ‫ن‬ِ‫م‬ ‫م‬ُ‫ك‬َ‫ل‬ َ‫ق‬َ‫ل‬َ‫خ‬ ْ‫ن‬َ‫أ‬ ِ‫ه‬ِ‫ات‬َ‫آي‬ ْ‫ن‬ِ‫م‬َ‫و‬‫ا‬ً‫اج‬َ‫و‬ْ‫َز‬‫أ‬ ْ‫م‬ُ‫ك‬ِ‫س‬ُ‫ف‬‫َن‬‫أ‬
ْ‫ي‬َ‫ب‬ َ‫ل‬َ‫ع‬َ‫ج‬َ‫و‬ ‫ا‬َ‫ه‬ْ‫ي‬َ‫ل‬ِ‫إ‬ ‫ا‬‫و‬ُ‫ن‬ُ‫ك‬ْ‫س‬َ‫ت‬ِ‫ل‬َّ‫ن‬ِ‫إ‬ ً‫ة‬َْ‫ْح‬َ‫ر‬َ‫و‬ ً‫ة‬َّ‫د‬َ‫و‬َّ‫م‬ ‫م‬ُ‫ك‬َ‫ن‬ِ‫ِف‬
ُ‫ر‬َّ‫ك‬َ‫ف‬َ‫ت‬َ‫ي‬ ٍ‫م‬ْ‫و‬َ‫ق‬ِ‫ل‬ ٍ‫ات‬َ‫ي‬ َ‫َل‬ َ‫ك‬ِ‫ل‬َ‫ذ‬َ‫ن‬‫و‬

11. Three Key words
‫سكون‬
‫ة‬َّ‫د‬َ‫و‬َّ‫م‬
‫ة‬َْ‫ْح‬َ‫ر‬َ‫و‬
1. Absence of movement
2. Love
3. Mercy

12. ‫سكون‬
1. No movement away from the spouse
2. No winning battles against the spouse
3. No disruptive influences
4. Congenial, tranquil surroundings
No storms in the harbor. No Trojan Horses

13. ‫ة‬َّ‫د‬َ‫و‬َّ‫م‬
1. Show your love
2. Do it often
3. Show appreciation for what you receive
4. Thank Allah‫ﷻ‬ for what He gave you
Your spouse is not a mind reader

14. ‫ة‬َْ‫ْح‬َ‫ر‬َ‫و‬
1. Give good for bad
2. Remember the times you enjoyed
3. Remember that you could be that person
4. Remember that you need the same from Allah‫ﷻ‬
This is a quality of Allah‫ﷻ‬

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