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Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
Managing The Unmanageable

     Starting and Stopping




         Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
Parents often feel they are in trouble too.

STOP THINGS THAT HURT YOU


                          Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
Stop Living Through Your Kids

• Having dreams for your children does not
  mean they want them
• You cannot be embarrassed by your kids.
  Embarrassment is totally subjective.
• Just because you may have done the same
  thing as your child doesn’t mean you have to
  approve it.

                 Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
Stop Listening To Others

• Do not accept insulting or judgmental
  opinions of your parenting.
• Defend your child without defending his/her
  actions.
• Family and friends are the most likely to
  remember where you went wrong. Do not
  engage.

                 Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
Stop Isolating Yourself

• No matter how tempting do not cut yourself
  off from the rest of the world.
• You are one of many parents dealing with
  these issues. “Why me?!” is not useful.
• Anger and blaming become more common
  when you “circle the wagons”.


                Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
Take back your life.

START THINGS THAT HELP YOU


                       Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
Act like a grownup

• Appearance matters. Don’t dress like coming
  to court is an every day event. (Work clothes
  are always welcome!)
• Defend your child without defending his/her
  actions.
• Stop complaining. Period.


                 Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
Start expressing your opinions

• I will NOT accept any judgment of my
  parenting.
• No. We did not all do this when we were
  his/her age.
• Thanks for your advice but we are working
  with professionals.


                 Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
Reach Out To Others
•
• There is nothing better than talking with
  people who know just how you feel.
• Parents new to the system are overwhelmed
  and need the voices of experienced ones.
• Perhaps you don’t need help but someone
  might need yours.


                Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
Remember

Stop living through your kids.

  Start acting like a grownup.

Stop listening to other people’s opinions.

  Start expressing your own.

Stop isolating yourself.

  Start reaching out to others who understand how you feel.


                           Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
www.victoriakamm.com         567.225.0877                  victoria@victoriakamm.com

                       Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved

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Managing the Unmanageable

  • 1. Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
  • 2. Managing The Unmanageable Starting and Stopping Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
  • 3. Parents often feel they are in trouble too. STOP THINGS THAT HURT YOU Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
  • 4. Stop Living Through Your Kids • Having dreams for your children does not mean they want them • You cannot be embarrassed by your kids. Embarrassment is totally subjective. • Just because you may have done the same thing as your child doesn’t mean you have to approve it. Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
  • 5. Stop Listening To Others • Do not accept insulting or judgmental opinions of your parenting. • Defend your child without defending his/her actions. • Family and friends are the most likely to remember where you went wrong. Do not engage. Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
  • 6. Stop Isolating Yourself • No matter how tempting do not cut yourself off from the rest of the world. • You are one of many parents dealing with these issues. “Why me?!” is not useful. • Anger and blaming become more common when you “circle the wagons”. Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
  • 7. Take back your life. START THINGS THAT HELP YOU Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
  • 8. Act like a grownup • Appearance matters. Don’t dress like coming to court is an every day event. (Work clothes are always welcome!) • Defend your child without defending his/her actions. • Stop complaining. Period. Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
  • 9. Start expressing your opinions • I will NOT accept any judgment of my parenting. • No. We did not all do this when we were his/her age. • Thanks for your advice but we are working with professionals. Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
  • 10. Reach Out To Others • • There is nothing better than talking with people who know just how you feel. • Parents new to the system are overwhelmed and need the voices of experienced ones. • Perhaps you don’t need help but someone might need yours. Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
  • 11. Remember Stop living through your kids. Start acting like a grownup. Stop listening to other people’s opinions. Start expressing your own. Stop isolating yourself. Start reaching out to others who understand how you feel. Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
  • 12. www.victoriakamm.com 567.225.0877 victoria@victoriakamm.com Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved