Anna has been in rehab for over 7 months to treat her anorexia. In her diary entries, she documents her struggle to accept that she has a problem, her resistance to the treatment plan, and her eventual progress in gaining weight and opening up to her therapist. By the end of her time in rehab, Anna has come to understand the serious health effects of anorexia and feels committed to maintaining healthy habits going forward.

2. Dear Diary,
I’ve been at rehab for little less than a day now and they made me keep a
journal. I don’t know why I’m here though. They say I’m sick, but I’m not. I
just don’t feel like eating. That doesn’t mean that I have anorexia... But I’m
stuck here for at least eight months.
My therapist (I have a therapist) told me that I show a few signs of
anorexia. Blotchy skin, fine hair, loss of body fat... She also gave me an
eating schedule. I don’t need an eating schedule though or to gain three
pounds a week. I might start gaining weight again...
They say I may even be suffering from depression. They don’t understand.
They don’t understand how it feels to be fat. I look at other girls and they’re
all so pretty and slim and I would always be the fattie. I want to be
beautiful, too.
That’s it for now,
Anna
Dear Diary,
I have been here for a while now, and I’ve accepted the fact I may have
been slightly anorexic. I still feel so cold at night even if I turn off the
air-­conditioner and close the windows. My therapist says that’s a result of
the anorexia, since my body lacks the fat that regulates heat. My thera-­
pist watches over me and talks to me about the long term effects of being
anorexic and what I might’ve put myself through. She said my bones could’ve
weakened, and that I could suffer from dehydration and malnutrition, and I
could get seizures. I never knew about those before. All I was ever worried
about was getting fat and my body.
She wants me to talk about how it feels after I eat something, but I tell
her that I didn’t eat. Now I think that eating is okay, as long as I don’t
eat that much. I’m just not sure if I can follow the eating schedule they’ve
given me...
That’s it for now,
Anna

3. Dear Diary,
I’ve gained a few pounds. I’m eating a little more and the gnawing pain in
my stomach is going away. They won’t let me do any physical activities
though. I can feel the fat building up in my arms and thighs. They don’t have
any mirrors, and they only let me weigh myself once a week and only when
my doctor is around.
I’m attending support group meetings, and I’ve met a few girls there. It’s...
nice talking to girls like me. Maybe I’ll make a few friends here after all.
That’s it for now,
Anna
Dear Diary,
I’m starting to open up more to my therapist now. I think that she can help
me with my... problem. I’ve told her that I used to eat as little food as
possible, and then I cut that food into pieces to make sure that they’re
really small. One of my friends had made me try out these pills that would
make you not want to eat. Those pills were awesome! I had lost weight
immediately after two weeks of using them. My therapist says those pills
were harmful to my health and that they brought me this problem. She also
asked me who my friend was and if I think my friend has the same problem
as I do. I didn’t tell her anything. My friend would kill me if I told anybody
about her or the pills.
That’s it for now,
Anna

4. Dear Diary,
I’m starting to finish my plates of food. I think the people helping me are
starting to trust me more. I was even allowed to look in the mirror last week.
They showed me how I looked when I first came in as well and I look so full
now. Parts of my ribs still show through but it’s more faint.
My support group was discussing some healthy eating habits we could try
to pick up after leaving rehab and some ways we can maintain our healthy
weight. Once I’m out, I think I’ll try eating out with more friends, like they
suggested to prevent any relapses. And eating six small meals a day
rather than three large ones seems pretty manageable as well.
That’s it for now,
Anna
Dear Diary,
I’ve been following my eating schedule rigorously for a few weeks now, and I
feel myself getting better. I’m starting to feel more comfortable in my body
too, and the everything around me just seems to feel happier.
It’s been five months since I got here. I feel like a completely different
person from when I got here. I finally reached a hundred pounds yesterday!
That means I’ve gained 40 pounds since I’ve gotten here, which is strange
because all of my clothes are tight, and my clothes haven’t been tight since
I can remember.
That’s it for now,
Anna

5. Dear Diary,
I haven’t written in a while because I have been so busy here! Believe it or
not, everyday I have at least three hours of social interaction with girls my
age, or older ladies who had the same problem as me. So much has changed
since I first came here and I finally KNOW that it was a good thing that
I am here.
Its been 7 months since my first day here, now that I have reach 105
pounds, they are letting me have 30 minutes of exercise. It feels so good to
be allowed to exercise without feeling fatigue.
That’s it for now,
Anna
Dear Diary,
I’m leaving tomorrow. I can go back home and see my friends and family
and get back to life. The other girls in support group are going home pretty
soon as well so today we spent most of the meeting saying goodbye and
exchange numbers and emails.
We also had some time to discuss our last topic: helping a friend who may
have anorexia. They told me I should steer my friend to focus on small goals.
People sometimes develop anorexia because they feel that this is one of the
things they can be good at. Instead of working on losing weight, they should
focus on other things that they’re interested in. I should also assure them
that keeping healthy is fine. If my friend ever finds herself always wanting
to lose weight, even if it isn’t necessary, she would need someone to talk to.
People who may be anorexic need someone to talk to. They need someone to
make them feel loved, because if I’m not there for them, they could end up like
I did.
That’s it for now,
Anna