2 of my journals from another class (part 2)

1. Afterreadingthischapter,Iidentified5differentoccasionseachforthe differentstylesof conflict
management.Tome,conflictscaneitherbe a learningexperienceoran extreme waste of time.Myself
personallyprefers“Avoid”and“Accommodate”and beingthe personIam those usuallycome intoplay
by default.Butthere are othersituationswhereI’ve usedthe otherthree withoutevenrealizingit.This
came alongwithhavingalittle more confidence inmyself,realizingmyself worth,andalsorealizingthat
I am alwaysentitledtomyownopinionaswell asanyone else is.
WhenI absolutelyknowIamrightabout somethingandsomeonewantstodisagree withme,I
tendto geta little offendedandgothe Compete conflictmanagementstyle.However,beforeIsay
anythingelse,Icalmmyself downandmake sure mythoughtsare in orderbefore Isay somethingthat
mightoffendthembackevenif theyare completelyandutterlywrong andregardlessof whetheritwas
a win-lose situation.Icouldsithere and talk to youall day aboutall the timesmy friendswouldcome at
my sidewaysbecausewe disagreedonsomethingandinthe endI wouldprove themwrong.Butone
time periodinmylife thatsticksoutthe mostiswhenI usedto workfor the Warren Theatre in Moore.
Everytime I wasscheduledbox officeitneverfailed.There wasalwayssomeonethatwouldstorminto
the building,targetthe firstpersontheysee (somehow itwasalwaysme),andbeginspoutingoff about
howtheyboughttheirticketsonline butfailedtoreadcarefullysotheypickedthe righttime.Naturally
theywouldblame itonme and my fellow employeesandeverytime we wouldcalmlycorrectthem
eithertothe pointof themapologizingorthemnotapologizingoutof embarrassmentandjustleaving.
Thisis one of those experiencesthattaughtme a lessoninhumility.
The Collaborationconflictmanagementisactuallymyfavorite one outof all of themas far as
musicgoes.WhenI’mmakingbeatsfor myfriendstorap overor whenwe’re justthrowingideas
togetherIalwaystry to make sure that it’sa mutual exchange because the taskathand justgetsdone
that much fasterandsmoother.Anditmakesiteasierforme to meshwithpeople Iamcollaborating
because of that mutual agreement.Iguess youcouldsaythat there isn’treallyaconflictwhenlookingat
collaborationunlessthose twoconflictsmeeteachotherhalfway.
ThiswhyI feel collaborationandcompromise are somewhatsimilar.The onlydifference
betweenthe twoisthatcollaboration iswin-winwhilecompromisingisbothsidesgivingupsomething.
One situationIwasin where bothpartieshadto compromise waswhenIwasina relationshipwithmy
girlfriendatthe time about5 or 6 yearsago. Neitherof ushadcars and we onlysaw each otherabout
once a week.Butwe bothmade a decisiontostickout the long-distance relationship(melivingonS.
OKCand her Edmond) for9 monthsuntil we justcouldn’tdoitanymore.Forthe most part we’re still on
goodterms.
The last twostylesof conflictmanagement,beingavoidandaccommodate,are the onesI
alwaysresortto naturallybutitdoesn’tnecessarilymake themmyfavorite.There have beenmany
situationswhere I’veavoidedconflictall togetheroraccommodatedtothe other’swill eitherbecauseI
didn’twantany hardfeelingsorIfeltlike myopinionwasn’tneededinthe moment.Itcouldalsobe
possible thatIwastoo scared to voice myopinion.Everytime thishappenedIimmediatelyregrettedit
because thatwas justone more thingthat I neededoff mychestbutchose not to outof some false
sense of the greatergoodor greaterresult.If there wasone thingI couldgo back in change isspeaking
up and notbeingafraidof beinghonestwithpeople.Becauseif theycare aboutyouthey will be there
for youno matterwhat andrespect youropinionevenif theydon’tagree.ButIcan’t go back intime,
therefore I’mmakingthe mostoutof each conflictingsituation.