Group dating is common in early adolescence as teens learn to relate to the opposite sex. Dating progresses from group activities, to pairing off in couples, to focusing on a single steady partner. Physical attraction initially draws teens together, but shared interests, personality, values, and goals become more important for maintaining a serious relationship. Communication, respect, and setting boundaries are key for navigating intimacy. While dating allows social and emotional growth, teens should make decisions that align with their own moral compass rather than feelings of pressure. Maintaining open communication with parents can help teens safely navigate the ups and downs of dating.

1. THE DATING GAME

2. What is dating?
 Date: a social meeting between two or more
people.
 During adolescence, people become more
aware of members of the opposite sex.
 Teens want members of the opposite sex to
find them attractive and likeable.
 A date may be spent watching TV or dancing
the night away. The activity rarely matters as
much as the people who share it.

3. Back in the old days…
 When your great-grandparents
were young, only young men
called for dates.
 Dates at the time were special
events that were planned well in
advance.
 Today, however, dating is much
more relaxed.
 Most people do not follow formal
dating rules.
 The word date may not even be
mentioned when couples make
plans.

4. Functions of Dating
 Dating fulfills two main functions.
 It helps you learn how to relate to members of the
opposite sex.
 It also prepares you for more lasting relationships
as an adult.
 Most people marry at some point in their lives.
 Few young teens know what type of person to
choose for a future spouse.
 Dating helps them learn what traits they want
in a marriage partner.

5. Stages of Dating
 People tend to go through stages in their dating
relationships.
 In the first stage, people date in groups.
 In the second stage, they form couples.
 In the third stage, people tend to date one steady
partner at a time.

6. Preparing for Dating
 Childhood relationships prepare people for
dating.
 Many children have playmates of the opposite
sex.
 Such playmates prepare people to relate to
dating partners.
 People tend to treat their dates the way their
parents treat each other.
 For instance, many children see their parents
respond to each other with warmth and
respect, these children will likely treat their

7. Stage One: Group Dating
 Young teens do not always
feel comfortable around
members of the opposite
sex.
 This is why many young
teens begin dating in
groups.
 Group dating is less
stressful.
 A group date may be a
planned activity.
 For example, two or more

8. Stage Two: Early Pairing
 After some group dating, teens feel more
confident around members of the opposite sex.
They worry less about what to say and do.
 They feel secure enough to begin pairing off in
couples. This starts the second stage of dating.
 You are not likely to learn private details about
your partner during this stage of dating.
 A lack of closeness prevents most second-stage
relationships from lasting.
 Partners in this stage enjoy spending time
together.
 However, they don’t feel committed to each other.

9. Stage Three: Steady Dating
 A bond forms between partners in the third
stage of dating.
 Steady dating partners feel true love and
concern for each other.
 People in this stage focus less on their own
needs and are more concerned about meeting
needs of their partners.
 The first two stages of dating prepare you for
this last stage.
 Knowing your needs prepares you to address
a partner’s needs in steady dating.

10. Choosing A Dating Partner
 A number of factors
can affect a person’s
choice of dating
partners.
 You must decide
which factors will
impact your selection
of dating partners.

11. Physical Traits
 A person’s physical
features make the first
impression.
 However, they are not the
most important quality in a
dating partner.
 People want to be liked for
more than their looks.
 They want to be noticed
for their other
strengths, too.

12. Age
 Parents often have rules about how old their
children’s dating partners can be.
 Therefore, age is a factor for many teens when
choosing a partner.
 Partners who are close in age are likely to
have more in common.
 Young women mature at an earlier age than
young men. The gap in maturity narrows as
teens near adulthood.
 In the early teen years, however, young
women often prefer partners who are a little
older.

13. Personality
 Teens are attracted to dating
partners who have pleasing
personalities.
 Many people look for a
caring, thoughtful partner or maybe
someone who is bright, witty, or
outgoing.
 You may have heard the phrase
“opposites attract.”
 It’s true that some people look for
traits in a partner they themselves
lack.

14. Common Interests and
Background
 Many teens look for partners with
whom they share common
interests.
 Having shared interests gives
couples something to discuss.
 A common background can
provide a base for a solid
relationship.
 Background includes culture and
home life as well as income and
educational levels.
 When partners have common
backgrounds, they can

15. Values and Goals
 You may not think much about values and
goals when you start dating.
 You may not mind if they don’t have the same
career goals as you.
 As you form closer
relationships, however, values and goals will
matter more.
 You may plan to marry when you are older and
you will want your marriage partner to agree
with you about important issues.

16. Dating Skills
 A successful date is a
pleasant experience
for both people
involved.
 However, good dates
don’t just happen.
 They require some
social skills that take
thought and practice.

17. Being a Thoughtful Partner
 Dating partners will enjoy being with you more
if you are thoughtful, keep your partner’s
feelings in mind when you are on a date.
 Use good manners, remember to say “please”
and “thank you”.
 Keeping your partners budget in mind shows
thoughtfulness.
 Being a thoughtful dating partner also involves
being honest.
 Don’t lead your partner to believe you like him
or her more than you really do.

18. Asking for a Date
 Asking for a date
takes a little courage
the first few times.
 Asking will be easier
if you plan what you
want to say.
 Plan to explain when
and where you’d like
to go for a date.

19. Accepting or Refusing A Date
 When someone asks you for a date, try to
respond promptly.
 Keeping the other person waiting is rude. He
or she may need to make other plans if you
cannot accept the date.
 Think of the other person’s feelings when you
refuse a date.
 Remember he or she took a risk when asking
you out, if you are not interested in dating that
person, politely let him or her know that.

20. Dating Questions
 Many teens have the
following questions
about dating: Am I in
love?
 Will the relationship
last?
 What will I do if we
stop seeing each
other?
 Learning more about
dating relationships
may help answer

21. Infatuation
 Teen’s feelings for their first dating
partners are often called “crushes” or
“puppy love”.
 Infatuation: an intense feeling of
admiration.
 It is often based on physical traits
 A young woman might have a crush on her
friend’s tall, handsome older brother.
 The phrase “love is blind” refers to
infatuation.
 It means you don’t notice faults when you

22. Love
 Love: a strong feeling of
attachment, warmth, and understanding
between two people.
 Love is less self-centered than infatuation, the
feeling is based on more than physical traits.
 Love is based on a total caring for someone; it
touches every part of a couple’s relationship.
 People who are in love enjoy being
together, they have common
interests, goals, and values.
 They talk about their thoughts and feelings
and make plans for their future together.

23. Serious Relationships
 Many teens question how serious they should
allow their relationships to become.
 Dating only one person has a number of
advantages:
A couple will grow to know each other better and
will become more comfortable with each other.
 Serious dating may also be preparation for a
mature committed relationship.

24. Serious Relationships Cont.
 Commitment: an
emotional pledge to
date only one
person.
 Many of these
couples later choose
marriage.

25. Serious Relationships Cont.
 Steady relationships
also have some
disadvantages.
 People take their
partners for granted.
 People may feel
they are missing the
chance to meet
other people.
 Partners have
trouble staying
interested in each
other.

26. Serious Relationships Cont.
 Some couples stay together only for reasons
of comfort and security.
 They may not want to “start over” with another
partner.
 These are not good reasons to stay in a
relationship with someone.
 These people may be keeping themselves and
their partners from finding other, more fulfilling
relationships.

27. Showing Affection
 Teens see frequent displays of
sexual activity in movies and
on television.
 Some teens say they feel
pressure from these forces to
have sex.
 Your decision about having a
sexual relationship should not
be affected by movie actors or
friends.
 However, it will affect you, your

28. Showing Affection Cont.
 Your decision about how to show affection will
be based partly on your beliefs about right and
wrong behavior.
 Different people have different moral values.
 Along with your beliefs, you should consider
some important facts.
 Think about your goals for the future.
 Consider how the consequences of sex might
block those goals.

29. Showing Affection Cont.
 Having sex can harm a person’s self-image.
 Young teens may feel guilty for going against
their moral values.
 They may feel weak for giving in to pressure
from a partner.
 You can care about someone without having
sex.
 Talking with your partner is one of the best
ways to show you care.

30. Breaking Up
 Couples break up for many reasons.
 Partners may find they do not get along as well
as they thought.
 Sometimes feelings fade and partners drift
apart.
 Mature behavior can make a breakup easier
for both partners.

31. Breaking Up Cont.
 Partners should tell
each other in a
kind, truthful way
why the breakup is
desired.
 This will help both
people preserve
their self-esteem.

32. Parents and Dating
 Most parents do not want to be nosy; they just
want to be informed.
 They want to be sure you will be safe.
 Make a point of introducing your dating
partners to your parents.
 Communicating the details of your dates
shows respect for your parents.
 Because of their concerns, parents may set
some rules for dating, talk frankly with your
parents.

33. Parents and Dating Cont.
 Ask your parents to let you help decide what
rules are right for you.
 Knowing your limits in advance will help you
avoid problems later.
 Parents can be a helpful resource in dating.
 Remember, they have dating experience, try
talking to them.
 They can offer advice and answer your
questions about dating.

34. The End!