Kermit the Frog waits over an hour for the bus in the rain, interacting with various characters who join him at the stop. First Elmo sits down and they have an awkward exchange about stereotypes. Next a teenager asks Kermit for cigarettes, not realizing frogs can't smoke. An old man then complains about being called old before his bus arrives. Finally, Donald Trump joins Kermit and they argue about politics and leadership abilities. Trump threatens Kermit with a laser on his head supposedly being held by Elmo, who is then attacked by a cat on a rooftop in a bizarre scene. When Kermit's bus finally comes, it is full and drives away, leaving Kermit frustrated.

1. Your Name
Script
(it is a rainy day and Kermit the frog is sat at a bus stop waiting for his bus)
Kermit: oh boy I really do hope my bus arrives soon, I havebeen sat here for an
hour and a half and my bus still hasn’tarrived.
(Elmo arrives and sits next to Kermit)
Kermit: oh, hey Elmo how’s it going
Elmo: hey Kermit it’s pretty wet so not great whatabout you isn’t this like your
type of weather cause your ya know
Kermit: oh justcause I’ma frog means I like water, wow Elmo that’s
stereotyping me
Elmo (yelling and whining): I’msorry ok god I didn’t mean it
Kermit: don’t usethe lords name in vain Elmo
Elmo: well whatcan I say
Kermit: I don’t know, anything the internet says you can
Elmo: so nothing then
Kermit: yep
(a bus pulls up at the bus stop and Elmo stands up)
Elmo: see ya Kermit, my bus is here
Kermit: yea yea Elmo what ever
(Elmo gets on the bus and the bus drives away, now a teenager around 15-17
sits down next to Kermit)
Teenager: ‘ere mate u got any ciggies
Kermit: nope I do not as I am a frog and it can kill me
Teenager: aright then just thoughtu were a cool frog and had some
Kermit: why would I have cigarettes if they kill me

2. Your Name
Teenager: I don’t know, to look hard or something
Kermit: well that might be true, can u tell me when the next number 1 bus is
Teenager: sure, it’s in erm, oh about 20 minutes mate
Kermit: aww c’mon man I’mgonna be late home
Teenager: ah tough luck mate, mine’s in a minute
Kermit: oh good for you dude that’s real good for you isn’t it, whilstI’m here
for another 20 minutes
Teenager: ooo sorry forgotyour hard
(a bus pulls up and the teenager stands up)
Teenager: well frogman see u later
Kermit: I’mnot a frog man boy
(the bus leaves the stop and the teenager flips Kermit off whilst the bus drives
away)
Kermit: why you little
(An old man arrives and sits next to Kermit and then begins to talk to him)
old man: why hello there young man how are you today
Kermit: oh hi there old time, I’m good thank you for asking, how areyou
Old man: how dare you call me an old timer I’m only 72 young man
Kermit: hey I’mnot that young sir I’m clearly near your age-old timer
Old man: don’tyell at me, my ears aren’t as equipped to noise as yours are
Kermit: ok but still you don’t say things like that to other people old man
Old man: oh, you’reone to talk Mr frog, u justcalled me old man again
Kermit: no, I didn’t, your hearing aid isn’t on probably

3. Your Name
Old man: oh, it is, can you tell me when the number three bus is due to arrive, I
have to get to Tesco for the deli chicken nuggets
Kermit: erm… its due to arrivenow, lucky old fart
Old man: did u say something
Kermit: hm oh no nothing
(a bus pulls up to the station and the old man gets on and waves good bye to
Kermit)
(its now been 12 minutes and Kermit’s bus is due to arrivein 4 minutes but one
more person is walking towards the bus stop)
Donald Trump: excuse me Mr the frog, is anyoneamazing sitting there next to
you
Kermit: erm no not that I’mawareof reject umpa lumpa
Donald Trump: reject umpa lumpa, do you know who I am, I am the president
of the united states of America show me respect
Kermit: its kinda hard to show an over grown annoying orangerespect, along
with the massivepile of crap u made your previously great country
Donald Trump: well how would you run the united states?
Kermit: better than you that’s for sure
Donald Trump: very funny sir very funny
Kermit: I was being serious, I could be a way better president than you ever
will be
Donald Trump: say that again and your brain explodes
(a red dot appears on Kermit’s forehead but he isn’tfazed by the threat)
Kermit: I know that’s justsome guy you pay to point a laser pen at someone’s
forehead
Donald Trump: erm no it isn’t

4. Your Name
Kermit: I can see that its Elmo up there, why is he pointing it at a random cat
(On a roof top)
Elmo: aww come here kitty, aww you’rea nice kitty… why are you hissing at
me oh god, please no don’t… aaaaahhhhh its ripping me to shreds someone
help me, Kermit please help me please
(back at the bus stop with Elmo screaming in the background whilst Kermit and
Donald watch)
Kermit: how many times a week does that happen
Donald trump: five, one every day of the week, except weekends
Kermit: do you justput him back together or send him to the sewing team
Donald trump: no, we justuse the time machine we havein area 51
Kermit: and how many brain tumours does he have
Donald Trump: 82
Kermit: wait a minute you have a time machine in area 51!?!?!?!?!?!
Donald Trump: I havesaid too much, bag and tag em boys
(two secret service agents appear from the bushes and put a wire under
Kermit’s skin)
Kermit: u know I can’t talk with out this guy’s hand up my ass
Donald trump: erm, wecan remove that later
(Elmo gets shot off the roof top and lands on the ground all mangled and on
the verge of death)
Elmo: Mr president, I might need to take a leave of absence, I can’t feel my
everything
Donald trump: nonsense, you look erm great
(Elmo passes out on the ground and shipped off to area 51)

5. Your Name
(the number 1 bus finally arrives and Kermit has a sigh of relief)
Kermit: oh, thank the lords my bus is finally here
(Kermit signals the driver but his bus is full so he shakes his head at Kermit and
drives away)
Kermit (taking a deep breath and exhales): FFFFUUUUUUUUUU.
(Skit ends, closing credits play and the closing family guy music plays in the
background)