3. Marriage and Divorce
Marriage is to be between one man and one
woman. It is not lawful for any man to have
more than one wife, or for any woman to
have more than one husband, at the same
time. [WCF 24.1, MESV]
Marriage was ordained for the mutual help of
husband and wife, for the increase of
mankind with legitimate offspring and of the
church with godly children, and for the
prevention of sexual immorality. [WCF 24.1,
MESV]
WCF
24.1-2
Civil Government and Family
4. Defining marriage
• God chooses his words carefully—twice!
• Genesis 2:24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his
mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one
flesh.
1. Parental pair is a father and mother
2. Marriage pair is a husband and wife
• A command meant for all humanity (wholly consisting of
Adam and Eve in the beginning)
• Tragically, a command rarely kept with any faithfulness
• God’s people engaged in polygamy for centuries
• Other cultures experimented with polyandry
• Contemporary postmodern culture is experimenting with every
form of sexual union
• God’s pattern for marriage is a one-flesh union of one man
and one woman
WCF
24.1
Civil Government and Family
5. The purposes of marriage
1. For mutual support
• Adam did not find any animal that could give
him the help and support he needed
• A wife is necessary for marriage!
2. For reproduction of the human race
• Parenting is important
• Sometimes Christians cannot have children
• Must be an extraordinary reason to refuse to
have children
Marriage is a “fruitful friendship”
WCF
24.2
Civil Government and Family
6. The purposes of marriage
3. For church growth
• Malachi 2:15-16 Did he not make them one, with a portion of
the Spirit in their union? And what was the one God seeking?
Godly offspring. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and let
none of you be faithless to the wife of your youth. "For the
man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says the
LORD, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence,
says the LORD of hosts. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and
do not be faithless."
• God wants his people to have godly children
• God sees Christian families as an important for church growth
• Seeking a godly offspring is additionally challenging to achieve
in the context of divorce
Godly children as marriage fruit is a church growth
mandate
WCF
24.2
Civil Government and Family
7. The purpose of marriage
4. For sexual purity
• Marriage is the normative context for sexual purity (1 Cor 7)
• Marriage was created when there was no immorality
• Marriage continues now when every kind of sexual sin
abounds
• Some have the gift of celibate purity, but most do not and
therefore should make it their ambition to marry
1 Corinthians 7:2, 9 But because of the temptation to sexual
immorality, each man should have his own wife and each
woman her own husband…But if they cannot exercise self-
control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to
burn with passion.
Marriage fosters and protects sexual purity
WCF
24.2
Civil Government and Family
8. Marriage and Divorce
It is lawful for all sorts of people to marry
who are able to give their intelligent
consent. Yet it is the duty of Christians to
marry only in the Lord. Therefore, those who
profess the true reformed religion should not
marry unbelievers, Roman Catholics, or other
idolaters; nor should Christians be unequally
yoked by marrying those who are notoriously
wicked in their way of living or hold to
damnable heresies. [WCF 24.3, MESV]
WCF
24.3
Civil Government and Family
9. Whom should people marry?
• In general, any single adult can be married
• Hebrews 13:4 Let marriage be held in honor among all,
and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge
the sexually immoral and adulterous.
• Encourage people to choose the most visible and
committed form of marriage that a culture has. Though
our culture minimizes marriage, Christians ought to
maximize marriage
• Encourage people to marry so long as both parties have
the maturity and wisdom to make this decision or
consent to an arrangement
• Freedom of choice is a good thing (Gen 24:57-58; 1 Cor
7:36-38)
Marriage should be honored and undefiled among all
WCF
24.3
Civil Government and Family
10. Marrying in the Lord
• Christians must assure themselves that they
are marrying Christians, and they must
have the best grounds for such a conclusion
• Christians are free to marry anyone, as long as he or she
belongs to the Lord
• 1 Corinthians 7:39 A wife is bound to her husband as long
as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be
married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.
• All other arrangements, regardless of motive, are
forbidden
WCF
24.3
Civil Government and Family
11. Any Christian?
• Christians must find their marriage-partner
in a church that loves and preaches the
gospel
• If you are a Reformed Christian, you should
not marry an “unreformed” person of any
kind:
• No Roman Catholic
• No infidel (Muslim or pagan)
• No idolater (one who flirts with or flagrantly practices)
• No professing Christian who lives a wicked life or clings
to error
WCF
24.3
Civil Government and Family
12. Why such restrictions for
Christians?
• In marriage we share all that we are and all that
we hold most deeply. Marriage is not a relationship
of roommates or inmates, but soulmates!
• In marriage “righteousness and wickedness” cannot
have much in common, nor can light and darkness
find any deep fellowship
• If you put Jesus Christ first in your lives, then you
will find guidance for engagement and a model for
your marriage
Marrying in the Lord is a protection from loneliness
and heartache, and a provision for intimacy and
happiness
WCF
24.3
Civil Government and Family
13. Marriage and Divorce
Marriage ought not to take place between
persons who are within the degrees of close
relationship by blood or by marriage
forbidden by the Word. Such incestuous
marriages can never be made lawful—so that
such persons may live together as man and
wife—by any law of man or by the consent of
the parties involved. [WCF 24.4, MESV]
WCF
24.4
Civil Government and Family
14. Consanguinity or affinity
• Definitions
• Consanguinity: quality of being descended from the same
ancestor as another person
• Affinity: the kinship relationship that is created or exists
between two or more people as a result of someone's marriage
• Basic idea is that we should go to the Bible to define
both marriage and any deviations from the definition
of marriage (see Leviticus 18)
• One of the most awful deviations is incest (Mk 6:18; 1 Cor 5:1)
• This paragraph forbids incestuous marriages
WCF
24.4
Civil Government and Family
15. Historical background
• King Henry VIII’s famous use of consanguinity in
affinity to justify an annulment of his marriage to
his brother’s (consanguinity) widow (affinity)
• Expanding list of marriage prohibitions in English
law
• Westminster Assembly sought to restrain the civil
law by using the Scriptures to define incest
• Original version of WCF 24.4 problematically
employed Leviticus 20 to forbid sexual practices
similar to Israel’s custom of “levirate marriage”
(Dt 25:5). American Presbyterians revised the text
in 1887 to remove this too-restrictive reference.
WCF
24.4
Civil Government and Family
16. Marriage and Divorce
Adultery or fornication committed after
engagement, if detected before marriage,
gives valid reason to the innocent party to
break the engagement. In the case of
adultery after marriage it is lawful for the
innocent party to seek a divorce and after
the divorce to remarry just as if the
offending party were dead. [WCF 24.5,
MESV]
WCF
24.5
Civil Government and Family
17. Adultery
• Basic idea is to clarify deviations within an actual
marriage or a betrothal/engagement
• One reason for divorce will always be adultery. Sexual
activity in the context of an betrothal/engagement is
fornication or adultery
• It is permissible to end a relationship on this basis
• Matthew 1:18-20 Now the birth of Jesus Christ took place in
this way. When his mother Mary had been betrothed to
Joseph, before they came together she was found to be
with child from the Holy Spirit. And her husband Joseph,
being a just man and unwilling to put her to shame,
resolved to divorce her quietly. But as he considered these
things, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a
dream, saying, "Joseph, son of David, do not fear to take
Mary as your wife, for that which is conceived in her is from
the Holy Spirit.
WCF
24.5
Civil Government and Family
18. Jesus’ teaching on adultery
Matthew 5:31-32 "It was also said, 'Whoever divorces his
wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.' But I say to
you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the
ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery,
and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
• Nothing less than adultery should be used as a reason for
divorce in a marriage
• Divorce and remarriage must have a cause as strong as
adultery in its defense
• Adultery is often a mortal wound for a marriage
• Illicit sexual activity does not require divorce or even make
divorce recommended, but it does justify divorce as lawful
Upon adultery, divorce is lawful but not required nor
necessarily recommended
WCF
24.5
Civil Government and Family
19. Marriage and Divorce
Although the corruption of mankind is such
that people are apt to seek arguments to
justify unwarranted separation of those whom
God has joined together in marriage, nothing
but adultery or such willful desertion as cannot
be remedied by the church or the civil
authorities is sufficient cause to dissolve the
bond of marriage. In such cases a public and
orderly procedure is to be observed, and the
persons concerned are not to be left to their
own wills and discretion in their own case.
[WCF 24.6, MESV]
WCF
24.6
Civil Government and Family
20. Adultery or desertion
• Unfortunately men and women have studied
inappropriate reasons for, and ways of,
ending marriages
• Jesus: divorce is lawful only if the one-flesh
covenant union has been broken (e.g.,
adultery)
• Paul: divorce is lawful only if the one-flesh
covenant union has been broken (e.g.,
desertion)
• 1 Corinthians 7:15 But if the unbelieving partner
separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister
is not enslaved. God has called you to peace.
WCF
24.6
Civil Government and Family
21. Strengthening the ties that bind
• OT case law shows profound wisdom in requiring a public and orderly
course of proceeding in the consideration of divorce (Dt 24:1-4)
• Husband and wife should not be left to the decision of divorce
themselves because:
• Marriage is such an intimate thing
• Marriage breakdown is such a destructive thing
• Wise counsel from both the church and the magistrate ought to be
seriously weighed
• Since marriage is an orderly public declaration, there should be an
orderly public attempt to mend marriages by church and civil
governments
• Only when these actions fail should we consider there is sufficient
cause to dissolve the strong bond of marriage
God wants church and state to make efforts to heal marriages
WCF
24.6
Civil Government and Family
22. Above all seek God’s counsel
“For obvious reasons, as we seek counsel, we
ought to seek God most earnestly of all.
Adultery and desertion are some of the sorest
trials ever to be endured by human beings. In
such cases Christians need to find the wisdom,
the comfort, and the example of forgiving
mercy that resides in the One who is always
faithful.”
~ Chad Van Dixhoorn, Confessing the Faith, 331
WCF
24.6
Civil Government and Family
23. Summary of key points
WCF
24
• God’s pattern for marriage is a one-flesh union of one man and one
woman
• Marriage is a “fruitful friendship”
• Godly children as marriage fruit is a church growth mandate
• Marriage fosters and protects sexual purity
• Marriage should be honored and undefiled among all
• Marrying in the Lord is a protection from loneliness and heartache,
and a provision for intimacy and happiness
• Upon adultery, divorce is lawful but not required nor necessarily
recommended
• God wants church and state to make efforts to heal marriages
Civil Government and Family
24. Consider and discuss
1. In what ways are the WCF’s teaching
on marriage comforting?
2. In what ways are the WCF’s teaching
on divorce comforting?
3. Discuss the differences between the
Bible’s view and our culture’s view of
marriage and divorce?
WCF
24
4. List some of the relationships of consanguinity and affinity
of which the Bible forbids marriage? (See Leviticus 18)
Discuss how the civil law compares with these restrictions.
5. What more could be added today to this chapter to address
the Bible’s teaching on marriage and divorce?
Civil Government and Family
25. Memorize
Therefore a man shall leave his
father and his mother and hold fast
to his wife, and the two shall
become one flesh? So they are no
longer two but one flesh. What
therefore God has joined together,
let not man separate.
Matthew 19:5-6
WCF
24
Civil Government and Family
26. Going deeper
Books
• Tripp, Paul. Marriage: Whose Dream? (Beginner)
• Adams, Jay. Marriage, Divorce, and Remarriage in the
Bible. (Intermediate)
• Keller, Tim & Kathy. The Meaning of Marriage.
(Intermediate)
• Ash, Christopher. Marriage: Sex in the Service of God.
(Advanced)
Articles
• Stanton, Glenn. The Research Proves The No. 1 Social
Justice Imperative Is Marriage.
• Articles on Marriage, Divorce and Remarriage at
Monergism.com.
WCF
24
Civil Government and Family
