2. Mother's guilt is real. Nearly all of us
experience it. We are racked with guilt,
feeling that our best isn't good enough.
We struggle when work commitments
prevent us from attending school events
and we are crushed by the looks of
disappointment on our children's faces.
We wonder if choices we have made,
such as what school to send our kids to,
have not had far-reaching negative
consequences, if a different path would
have resulted in happier, more well-
adjusted kids.
3. We moms might feel guilty when we
can't afford something for our kids or
are nagged by the feeling that we
simply don't spend enough time with
them.
4. All moms, even the most amazing,
attentive and committed moms, feel at
some point that they are not good
enough. A Pew Research Center survey
found that the number of moms who
want to work full-time is declining, from
32 percent to 21 percent between 1997
and 2007, indicating that mommy guilt
is getting the better of many American
women. No matter what we do right as
parents, we tend to more often focus on
our failings.
5. Mother's guilt frequently visits me as I
prepare my three children for their
school day. Maybe I realize that, on a
cold day, I've forgotten gloves and a hat
for my 6-year-old or that the children
went to school and left their lunch
boxes on the counter. Just recently, I
forgot to bring the plates for a school
party and immediately felt guilty when
my son said, "Mom, why did you bring
the plates so late?" I had an excuse,
but my son could care less that I posted
bringing the plates to his school
function on the wrong date in my
electronic calendar.
6. Mother's guilt isn't going anywhere
and we all will be stricken with it at
some time or another. Think about
your own mother. She has probably
shared with you her memories of
parenting and what she believes she
could have done differently to impact
your life for the better.
7. Here are my personal
rules for silencing
mother's guilt
8. • Get real. Understand that perfection and parenting is
ridiculous. Accept that you will make mistakes and be honest
with your children when you drop the ball.
• Stop judging yourself. Your best is good enough. Stop
comparing your best to other classroom moms, working
parents and neighborhood families. Live out your own story
and stop attempting to star in someone else's drama.
• Turn in your supermom cape. Acknowledge that love is the
only requirement to becoming a supermom.
• Keep it positive. Focus on the positive things that you are
doing. Instead of looking at what isn't working with your
parenting, ask yourself, "What am I doing right?" Ask your
children the same question. Their answers might surprise
you.
9. • Laugh. Learn to laugh at your flubs.
• Know that a little guilt makes you healthy. It means
that you care about your family and the way that they
experience you.
• Don't sweat the small stuff. Sometimes we are our
own worst critics. Breathe in and blow it out. Tomorrow
is a new day.
• Create a supportive community for yourself. Consider
joining in with a group of moms that are non-judgmental
and supportive.
10. Mother's guilt is only natural and is the
consequence of wanting to be a good
mother to your children. However, in the
end it will only weigh you down.
Consider my tips and shed those extra
pounds! You'll find that you feel lighter,
happier, and more ready and willing to
enjoy motherhood for the important and
fulfilling experience that it is. And when
faced with the disappointing fact that
you are not capable of providing your
children with everything you want for
them, remember that no child that grew
up with love in their home was left
wanting.
11. Are you ready to commit better
Self-Care? vis
www.TimeForMom-
it
Me.com
Me and a community of Moms
will help you!
Mia
Redrick
