Gone are days when boys are made of "snips and snails and puppy dog tails" and girls are made of "sugar and spice and everything nice"... or are they? Children are barraged with messages about gender and heterosexual norms everywhere they go - their homes, their schools, the media, and more. Do you know what hidden lessons they are learning? How do gender and sexuality affect everything from boys struggling in school to girls dropping out of the STEM pipeline, from sexual harassment to anti-gay bullying, from eating disorders to plastic surgery? How do parents, guardians, teachers, and schools provide safe environments for positive self esteem, healthy identity development, and acceptance of differences?
Graland Country Day Gender and Sexuality Diversity
1. Graland Country Day School
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee
Seattle Girls’ School
What Boys and Girls Are Made Of:
Gender and Sexuality Diversity
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
3. Agenda
• Gender Differences
• Gender Bias
• Impacts of the Gender Binary
• When the Binary Doesn’t Work
• Rethinking Gender and Sexuality
• What Can We Do?
• Discussions
• Resources
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
16. Boys and Gender Bias
Where Does it Lead?
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17. Central Message for Boys
Do Not Be Weak.
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Be so, and you will be likened to
a girl or you will be called gay.
18. The “Tough Guy” in Conflict
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19. The “Tough Guy” in the Workplace and the Home
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23. Process Break
What is new, interesting,
thought provoking?
How have you seen gender
showing up for your children
?
What are the specific questions
or concerns that come up for
how to support children?
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
24. What Many of Us Were Taught
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Born with Male Parts
Calls Himself a Man
Displays Masculinity
Is Attracted to
Women
Man Woman
Born with Female
Parts
Calls Herself a
Woman
Displays Femininity
Is Attracted to Men
Boys Will Be Boys
A Man’s Man
Snips and Snails and Puppy Dog Tails
Macho Men
Girls Will Be Girls
Woman’s Domain
Sugar and Spice and Everything Nice
The Feminine Mystique
Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus
26. What Can We Do?
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
27. What Can We Do for Girls?
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee
• Teach the difference
between self-sacrificing and
good.
• Talk about or compliment
something besides her looks.
• Value the quality of her
relationships, not the
quantity.
• Give her access to diverse
women mentors.
• Role-Play difficult
conversations with her.
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
28. What Can We Do for Boys?
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee
• Teach the difference
between strong and
tough.
• Talk about feelings and
relationships.
• Make it okay to be
vulnerable.
• Give him access to
diverse male mentors.
• Help them understand
societal homophobia.
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
29. What Can We Do for Gender Diverse Kids?
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee
• Minimize gendered
language.
• Interrupt gender exclusive
behavior.
• Make gender insignificant
in grouping.
• Mix up gender
stereotyped activities.
• Believe what they tell you.
• Normalize their
experience.
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
30. What Can We Do for All?
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee
• Help them develop strong interaction and social skills.
• Show them diverse role models of all GSD identities.
• Teach about gender and sexuality diversity.
• Respect and nurture their true selves.
• Teach “norm”, “normal”, and “good”.
• Share your stories.
• Model the way.
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
31. Rosetta Eun Ryong LeeRosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/)
Teach Media Literacy
• Choose media FOR intentionally for the classroom.
• Engage in media WITH youth.
• Help youth understand the hidden messages of media.
• Help youth think about how they want to internalize or
reject these messages.
33. Presenter Information
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee
6th Faculty and
Professional Outreach
Seattle Girls’ School
2706 S Jackson Street
Seattle WA 98144
(206) 805-6562
rlee@seattlegirlsschool.org
http://tiny.cc/rosettalee
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
34. Resources
• Joshua M. Aronson, Ph.D., “Improving Achievement &
Narrowing the Gap,” Learning and the Brain
Conference, Cambridge, MA, November 2003
• Allan G. Johnson, Privilege, Power, and Difference.
• Miss Representation, documentary film on media and
women
• United Nations Population Fund Statistics on Gender
Equality as of 2005
http://www.unfpa.org/swp/2005/presskit/factsheets/facts
_gender.htm
• Learning to be critically literate of mass media
http://www.medialit.org/
• Media Guide for Parents and Educators
http://www.commonsensemedia.org/
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
35. Gender Resources
• JoAnn Deak, Ph.D., Girls Will Be Girls: Raising
Confident and Courageous Daughters, How Girls
Thrive
• Jackson Katz, Tough Guise, Wrestling with Manhood,
The Macho Paradox
• John Medina, Talaris Research Institute, various
studies on early gender differences in competition and
play
• Mary Pipher, Ph.D., Reviving Ophelia: Saving the
Selves of Adolescent Girls
• Rachel Simmons, Odd Girl Out, Odd Girl Speaks Out,
Curse of the Good Girl
• Michael Thompson, Raising Cain, Speaking of Boys,
It’s a Boy!
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
36. Gender and Sexuality Diversity Resources
• Jennifer Bryan
• Gender Odyssey
• Gender Spectrum
• GLSEN
• Northwest Network
• Put This On the Map
• Safe Schools Coalition
• Social Justice Handbook Guide to Gender
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)