The document provides instructions for students to practice their awareness and listening skills. It describes various challenges students can undertake, such as paying attention to conflict styles, noticing when they use "roadblocks" in communication, turning off their phone to focus on listening, or acknowledging people they don't normally talk to. For each challenge, students are asked to describe their experience, any insights gained, and how it relates to emotional intelligence. They are also instructed to write a paper reflecting on practicing their skills in interpersonal interactions, discussing the impact of using specific skills.

1. PRACTICE #1: Practice Awareness Skills
Instructions for Practicing Awareness
Part of preventing and managing conflict and improving our
interpersonal relationships involves being more aware — of our
own behaviors and the impact that they have on others, of other
people’s emotions and reactions and situations, of
circumstances that might contribute to conflict, of how even
subtle changes can influence situations, etc. There aren’t really
any specific rules for practicing awareness, so you can design
your own challenge for this one! Think of ways that you can
practice awareness in your own life, and try doing some of
those things.
That might involve being more “mindful” of your own feelings
and behaviors, paying more attention to others, taking the time
to notice things that maybe you didn’t really pay much attention
to before. As we go through some of the materials, you may get
ideas on things to pay attention to. Experiment with some
different approaches to being more aware. Describe what you
did, what the experience was like, and how it impacted your
interactions with others. Did it help you to prevent or manage
conflict more effectively? (You may find that these also help
you with your listening skills practice.)
Some examples of things you might do:
For a week, pay attention to the conflict styles that you use, and
the styles that other people use. Describe in detail the
situations. (Remember, you
’re writing for someone who wasn’t there, so you need to
explain what happened.)
If looking at your own styles, what influenced your choice of
style, or did you find yourself automatically using that style
without really thinking about it? How did the other person
react, and how did it impact the dynamics of the situation? Did
you find yourself changing styles at any point
—

2. if so, why, and how did that work? If you
’
re observing others or reacting to another person
’
s style, do a similar analysis.
What did you learn from the experience?
Or, for a week, pay attention to the times when you’re tempted
to use “roadblocks” when you’re communicating, or how often
others use roadblocks. In what situations do these cause
problems, and when do they seem to be okay? How do you
react when others use them, and how do they react when you
use them. You might also practice trying NOT to use
roadblocks. How much of a challenge is this? What techniques
did you use that were helpful or not helpful?
What did you learn from the experience?
Or, for a week, try turning off your cell phone for at least part
of the day and focus on listening and observing what’s going on
around you! What might you see or hear that you aren
’
t normally aware of? How does this impact how you feel and
how you interact with others? Is this difficult for you to do?
What did you learn from the experience?
Or, take some time to notice and acknowlege people that you
don
’
t usualy pay much attention to, and observe their reactions.
Maybe it
’
s talking with the person bagging your groceries or cleaning
your dorm, or acknowledging people as you walk by them on
campus, or striking up a conversation with someone that you
wouldn
’
t ordinarily talk to. What was the experience like? How did
people react? How did it make you feel? What did you learn
from the experience?

3. Or create your own challenge and try it out for at least three
days. Describe what your
“
awareness
”
challenge was, why you chose it, and what your experiences
were. What did you learn from the experience?
WRITING THE PAPER(S)
Content of your paper(s) -
In writing about your experience in practicing awareness:
Describe what you decided to do for this challenge.
Provide a detailed description of what your experience was.
What challenges did you face in this situation and how did you
handle them?
What insights did you gain from this experience?
Relate this experience to the self-awareness and/or social
awareness aspects of emotional intelligence. (Refer back to the
handouts on emotional intelligence.) How did this practice
help to enhance either your self-awareness or your social
awareness?
Format -
Papers should be typed, double-spaced. Use a 12-point font
that is easily readable (Times New Roman is recommended, but
not required). Use 1 inch margins on all sides. Use page
numbering. The title of the paper, your name and the class
and semester should appear at the top of the first page as
follows:
Practice/Reflection Paper - Awareness
Student Name (replace this with your name)
Intro to Conflict Management - Spring 2017

4. Length -
There is not a specific length requirement for these papers,
though
a reasonable expectation would be that at least two pages would
be written about each skills practice
(probably more). You could easily write more, depending on
the complexity of the situation and the thoroughness of your
discussion and analysis. An IN-DEPTH discussion and analysis
is expected. You will be expected to provide all of the
information requested for the assignment, present sufficient
detail that I can understand what was happening in each
situation (names can be changed to protect the innocent or
guilty if need be), and demonstrate a good understanding and
analysis of each situation and how the concepts we’ve been
studying apply in that situation.
Expectations -
The goal of these assignments is for you to practice your
awareness, listening, assertion and principled negotiation skills,
and to be able to identify which skills are most valuable in a
given situation.
Your papers should clearly explain the situation(s), accurately
identify the skills used, and assess the impact of those skills.
Papers will be evaluated on your demonstrated understanding of
and ability to apply what we’ve learned, the thoroughness of
your analysis, insights, and the quality of your presentation of
the information
How to Do Well on This Assignment -
Follow instructions! Make a sincere effort to actually practice
the skills. (It’s even okay if they didn’t work, as long as you
can reflect upon the experience and figure out why they didn’t
work or what could have been done differently.) Include all of
the information requested in the instructions — that’s what I’ll
be looking for. Do some in-depth analysis of how things went,
and demonstrate what you learned from the experience.

5. Instructions for Practicing Listening Skills
Once you’ve learned about how to avoid roadblocks and use
attending, following and reflecting skills covered in the
People Skills
book (Chapters 2 through 7), practice using your best listening
skills in your everyday life. After practicing these skills in a
number of your interactions with others, describe at least one
situation where you were able to use your listening skills
extensively.
Listening skills to practice:
Avoiding Roadblocks
Attending Skills
Following Skills
Reflecting Skills (paraphrasing, reflecting feelings, reflecting
meanings, summative reflections)
Some ideas for utilizing your listening skills:
Take some time to learn more about other people in your life.
How much do you really know about your roommate and what
it was like for them growing up? Do you know how your
parents or grandparents met and what attracted them to each
other? Do you know why people you know here decided to
come to Kent State and what their hope and dreams are?
Sometimes even people we think we know, we really don
’
t know much about at all. Take some time to learn more about
the people in your life, and really listen to their stories. What
did you learn that you didn
’
t know before? Did this information give you any insights into
why this person behaves the way that they do, or change your
perception of them in any way? How did it make you feel to

6. listen to their stories? (Note: There
’
s a neat app called StoryCorps that you could use on your phone
or iPod/iPad, that is designed for recording interviews with
people that you can send in to be part of an historical archive.
Learn more about it here:
http://www.karmatube.org/videos.php?id=6202
(This exercise could also be used to practice your listening
skills for Practice #2, if you wait until we’ve covered those in
class.)
Want a bit more of a challenge?
You could try doing a "Listening Project" by using your
listening skills with someone who disagrees with you on a
social or political issue that you feel strongly about -- instead of
arguing, listen and ask questions to learn more about their
views! That’s a bit more challenging to do, but can produce
some interesting results.
Want to get some ideas for your YES! Essay? You could
discuss the YES! essay topic with people you know and get
their thoughts on the topic. (Can you listen without arguing?)
WRITING THE PAPER
Content of your paper -
In writing about your experiences:
Describe the situation(s).
Discuss in detail which specific skills that you used and why.
Analyze how the use of these skills impacted the dynamics of
the situation and how your use of these skills impacted both you
and the other person.
What challenges did you face in this situation and how did you
handle them?
What was the outcome?
Discuss which skills
were the most valuable in this situation.

7. Reflect upon your experiences, what was most difficult, what
was easiest, and what you've learned.
Format -
Papers should be typed, double-spaced. Use a 12-point font
that is easily readable (Times New Roman is recommended, but
not required). Use 1 inch margins on all sides. Use page
numbering. The title of the paper, your name and the class
and semester should appear at the top of the first page as
follows:
Practice/Reflection Paper - Listening
Student Name (replace this with your name)
Intro to Conflict Management - Spring 2017
Length -
There is not a specific length requirement for these papers,
though
a reasonable expectation would be that at least two pages would
be written about each skills practice
(probably more). You could easily write more, depending on
the complexity of the situation and the thoroughness of your
discussion and analysis. An IN-DEPTH discussion and analysis
is expected. You will be expected to provide all of the
information requested for the assignment, present sufficient
detail that I can understand what was happening in each
situation (names can be changed to protect the innocent or
guilty if need be), and demonstrate a good understanding and
analysis of each situation and how the concepts we’ve been
studying apply in that situation.
Expectations -
The goal of these assignments is for you to practice your
awareness, listening, assertion and principled negotiation skills,
and to be able to identify which skills are most valuable in a
given situation.

8. Your papers should clearly explain the situation(s), accurately
identify the skills used, and assess the impact of those skills.
Papers will be evaluated on your demonstrated understanding of
and ability to apply what we’ve learned, the thoroughness of
your analysis, insights, and the quality of your presentation of
the information
How to Do Well on This Assignment -
Follow instructions! Make a sincere effort to actually practice
the skills. (It’s even okay if they didn’t work, as long as you
can reflect upon the experience and figure out why they didn’t
work or what could have been done differently.) Include all of
the information requested in the instructions — that’s what I’ll
be looking for. Do some in-depth analysis of how things went,
and demonstrate what you learned from the experience.