1. What is on your mind And what elseAs my wife and I have k.docx

1. What is on your mind? And what else?
As my wife and I have kind of put on hold things till after the
summer, I feel like it a really good choice. We did not put
coaching on hold, nor has she stopped looking for a job, but
rather she is looking for a GS job that could take months to get
due to the background checks and application process. We have
come to the realization that we will have to commute as we
were trying to avoid that, but reality has it that if we want the
jobs, we want then we are going to have to.
2. What is the real challenge for you now that we have gone
through this process?
It was a real challenge to understand her side, and just when I
thought I had it I would be back at square one. For instance, I
knew she wanted a job from seven to three in the afternoon and
I know my daughter has therapy but for some reason in my brain
I was just not thinking about that, but I was thinking about
money, job, and her working. Our last conversation helped me
to hear this instead of just listening to her.
3. What is the desired goal? (You can have them do an exercise
for you where they draw {pictures} their goal and where they
see themselves)
That is a very interesting concept, I asked my wife about this
and she said that it would be a picture of her behind a desk, in
work clothes, and having some responsibility. I asked about a
list she would make also. Other then her main goal of working
her big concerns are her working and able to support our family
at least for a little bit when I retire so that I do not have to rush
into the work force, and I can take some time.

4. What else can I do to support you? Who else can help? Do
they know?
I can honestly only be there for her right now. I offered to go to
a hiring event with her, she is nervous about going and she
asked if I could come and support her. I am helping her get a
resume together as well as work on her cover letter to hand out
at this event. I think just being there for her and helping her
with the transition is what is going to help her most. She is
independent and can mange by herself but does better support.
She leans on her friends for support, she also reaches out to a
Facebook group that helps spouses find jobs as well as post job
events, she also has made appointments with the people that
help write resumes on post to get incite and have professional
help with it.
5. If you say yes to this, dedicate your time to this, what are
you saying no to? This is key, make a commitment.
She has my full support; I offer any help that I can as well as
any leads that I can with the help of people that I have met in
my line of work. We are both fully committed, and I think that
is what is making this process go further beucase we have the
same goals as well as wants for the outcome we are going for.
6. What has been most useful to you?
Mapping out what she wants the outcome to be. It had changed
and she is still back and forth between working GS or USAA
but in the end the better job will show once she gets an offer.
Keeping with the ABS’s has helped me to coach her better. It
brings me back to ask the questions, make the suggestions and
rework things that may not be working with her.
7. COACH - reflect on the entire process, what worked, what
did not work? What would you do differently? What options did

you have to change course? What are your next steps?
Working together has just always worked for us. I didn’t have
any reservations about stepping up to coach my wife. She likes
to rely on me, and I rely on her. This works out very well
beucase she is open to suggestions from me, she understands
that I have the experance and she has the smarts. We make a
great team. The thing that did not work for a bit was me not
understanding her concerns, and I honestly do not even know
why I did not understand them beucase its our everyday life
with our daughter and her likelihood that she needs to become
an adult. I had to not just listen to her, but I needed to start
hearing her. Our next steps right now are just taking it slow if
something comes up with a job for it, we deal with it then. We
have summer coming up and with three children out of school it
can be harder to find child care as well as pay them for the day
with all the kids verse one child at home.
Alzheimer’s Disease
76-year-old Iranian Male
BACKGROUND
Mr. Akkad is a 76 year old Iranian male who is brought to your
office by his eldest son for “strange behavior.” Mr. Akkad was
seen by his family physician who ruled out any organic basis for
Mr. Akkad’s behavior. All laboratory and diagnostic imaging
tests (including CT-scan of the head) were normal.
According to his son, he has been demonstrating some strange
thoughts and behaviors for the past two years, but things seem
to be getting worse. Per the client’s son, the family noticed that
Mr. Akkad’s personality began to change a few years ago. He
began to lose interest in religious activities with the family and
became more “critical” of everyone. They also noticed that
things he used to take seriously had become a source of
“amusement” and “ridicule.”

Over the course of the past two years, the family has noticed
that Mr. Akkad has been forgetting things. His son also reports
that sometimes he has difficult “finding the right words” in a
conversation and then will shift to an entirely different line of
conversation.
SUBJECTIVE
During the clinical interview, Mr. Akkad is pleasant,
cooperative and seems to enjoy speaking with you. You notice
some confabulation during various aspects of memory testing,
so the PMHNP performs a Mini-Mental State Exam. Mr. Akkad
scores 18 out of 30 with primary deficits in orientation,
registration, attention & calculation, and recall. The score
suggests moderate dementia.
MENTAL STATUS EXAM
Mr. Akkad is 76 year old Iranian male who is cooperative with
today’s clinical interview. His eye contact is poor. Speech is
clear, coherent, but tangential at times. He makes no unusual
motor movements and demonstrates no tic. Self-reported mood
is euthymic. Affect however is restricted. He denies visual or
auditory hallucinations. No delusional or paranoid thought
processes noted. He is alert and oriented to person, partially
oriented to place, but is disoriented to time and event [he
reports that he thought he was coming to lunch but “wound up
here”- referring to your office, at which point he begins to
laugh]. Insight and judgment are impaired. Impulse control is
also impaired as evidenced by Mr. Akkad’s standing up during
the clinical interview and walking towards the door. When the
PMHNP asked where he was going, he stated that he did not
know. Mr. Akkad denies suicidal or homicidal ideation.
Diagnosis: Major neurocognitive disorder due to Alzheimer’s
disease (presumptive)
Alzheimer’s Disease
76-year-old Iranian Male

Decision Point One
Begin Aricept (donepezil) 5mg orally at BEDTIME
RESULTS OF DECISION POINT ONE
· Client returns to clinic in four weeks
· The client is accompanied by his son who reports that his
father is “no better” from this medication
· He reports that his father is still disinterested in attending
religious services/activities, and continues to exhibit
disinhibited behaviors
· You continue to note confabulation and decide to administer
the MMSE again. Mr. Akkad again scores 18 out of 30 with
primary deficits in orientation, registration, attention &
calculation, and recall
Decision Point Two
Increase Aricept to 10mg orally at bedtime
RESULTS OF DECISION POINT TWO
· Client returns to clinic in four weeks
· Client’s son reports that the client is tolerating the medication
well, but is still concerned that his father is no better
· He states that his father is attending religious services with
the family, which the son and the rest of the family is happy
about. He reports that his father is still easily amused by things
he once found serious
Decision Point Three
Continue Aricept 10mg orally at BEDTIME
Guidance to Student
At this point, it would be prudent for the PMHNP to continue
Aricept at 10 mg orally at bedtime. Recall that this medication
can take several months before stabilization of deterioration is
noted. At this point, the client is attending religious services
with the family, which has made the family happy. Disinhibition
may improve in a few weeks, or it may not improve at all. This

is a counseling point that the PMHNP should review with the
son.
There is no evidence that Aricept given at doses greater than 10
mg per day has any therapeutic benefit. It can, however, cause
side effects. Increasing to 15 and 20 mg per day would not be
appropriate.
There is nothing in the clinical presentation to suggest that the
Aricept should be discontinued. Whereas it may be appropriate
to add Namenda to the current drug profile, there is no need to
discontinue Aricept. In fact, NMDA receptor antagonist therapy
is often used with cholinesterase inhibitors in combination
therapy to treat Alzheimer’s disease. The key to using both
medications is slow titration upward toward therapeutic doses to
minimize negative side effects.
Finally, it is important to note that changes in the MMSE should
be evaluated over the course of months, not weeks. The absence
of change in the MMSE after 4 weeks of treatment should not be
a source of concern.
1. What are you trying to achieve? What options are different
now than they were before?
I am trying to achieve helping my wife get back into the work
field when she has been a stay at home mom for over nine years.
She works hard and she wants to go back to work but its hard to
get into her field of choice even with a degree. I am working to
guide her and try to help her network with people that I may
know in my jobs. There have not been any great changes to the
options. We have had some hurdles with her working as coach I
had gotten wrapping up in her working and brining in income
that I had forgotten she needs to work around our daughters’
therapy.
2. Why is this important? Does what is on your mind now,
impact the importance?

This is a very important factor that I had forgotten about. I am
not sure why I would ever forget about this, without our
daughters therapy she can not progress, it is imperative that she
maintains her therapy. I am a little worried she will not be able
to get the hours that she needs, or we will not find someone that
is willing to transport the kids so that our daughter can go to
therapy. We talked about the concerns of both and right now
until she is offered a job, we have decided to not stress over it.
The importance of this really is stress, we were both stressing
about her getting the hours, she was stressing more about how
to work, manage the kids, therapy and the home. As we put
these stresses on the back burner it takes the weight off the
coaching and relationship because we can only plan so much
under not knowing where she would work of the hours that she
would need to work.
3. What worked and what did not work? What was the real
challenge for you?
The method is working very well, we both agree on a lot of the
same issues, and when we do not agree sometimes, we need to
take a break and come back to it. Doing this has worked very
well, so that we can both collect our thoughts, figure out how
and what to say so that there is understanding and companion
from both parties. There are many challenges in this, beucase of
the all the factors that are involved. A big challenge for us are
our daughter’s therapy’s, the kids, her working hours she needs
as well as being able to be there if I am not. I am active duty
and I do tend to go away often. This may hinder her time in the
office and may become a factor. We talked about a nanny and
we will be going with that option as it will help our family
manage our time better with therapy and work load.
4. If you were to start over, what would you do differently?
How could I have helped or guided you?

I would listen more; she has been pointing out that therapy
trumps her working. I understand that because we are building
up our daughter to overcome the obstacles that she must face
every day, without these she may not grow into the Adult that
we know she can become. My wife has been applying a few
different jobs, even went on a website that offers work from
home positions and applied to several them. She is trying to
make it work. I feel like guided could have helped, I had started
to focus on money and was so wrapped up in my wife working
and how much money we could save that I had forgotten a
priority that she has and that its important to not only her but
all of us.
5. COACH - reflect on the questions and your perspectives
focusing on the shared vision of success, is there buy-in?
Required changes, be specific, clarify the action and
commitment needed from the coachee, and lastly offer
appreciation for continuing the process.
As a coach, my wife and I have the same long-term vision. I am
retiring in three years; she is going back to work. This gives us
a three-year cushion for her to get into a career that she can be
stable in. this will give me time when I transition out to take a
bit of time and figure out what I want to do. Considering my
only work experance is military it is going to be a change for
me to transfer over into the civilian sector.
This is our buy in, retirement. We are both invested in this not
only for us as a couple but also for our children. They are all
young and they will still be growing up and with us for years to
come. We must have all these factors worked out with short
term and long-term goals. This is something we have both said
needs tweaking every now and then, this is life and we are
dealing with five of them. The schools where we retire need to
be good, job opportunities for my wife and I need to be good,
the housing market and so on. The good thing here is that we

both know and understand these issues it is something that is
open communication and we are on the same page.
This process has been great for both of us. I think there were a
lot of things that were left unsaid between us, with her still in
college and moving etc. She has always put our kids first before
herself and my carrier before herself. She is trying to find
herself and see who she is other then mom and wife. She has
been going to Obstacle Course races over the weekends that she
enjoys, and I think this is building her confidante up about
being away from the kids. She is seeing she can do other things
without us and enjoy them. We have become closer and more
communitive going though this process and I hope that it
continues on this path.
1. What are you trying to achieve? What options are different
now than they were before?
After much talk between my wife and I, she has become unsure
of she wants to still apply on post or at USAA. I try and direct
her as best I can. USAA will offer between pension as well as
401K, but the hours may not work with being home for our
oldest to take to therapy. Understanding this I had my priorities
set on money hers are set on how she can balance work, home,
the kids and appointments. It is something that we were failing
on seeing eye to eye on until this weekend. I have been so
focused on her getting a job and having the extra income for
when we buy a home in a few years that I was failing to see the
heavy impact that she must support even with working.
2. Why is this important? Does what is on your mind now,
impact the importance?

This is very important beucase our daughter cannot go without
therapy. She goes three times out of the week and there is not
time that would work with a regular nine to five type of job
with the traffic here in San Antiono. We talked about getting a
nanny that is a high priority that we will be focused on, but it
still leaves us that they would have to transport all three of our
kids to our daughters therapy if my wife can not get the hours
she needs in order to be able to still work and take care of the
kids.
3. What worked and what did not work? What was the real
challenge for you?
The real challenge for me as her coach was her not seeing the
impact that her working would make on our finances. I was so
focused on in three years were going to retiree, and if she does
not have a job I can not retire. We need to save money for our
retirement home. This was not working, because after our
conversation this past weekend the things that I had been
focused on are only some of the things she is focused on. She
has been applying for jobs, so it’s not like she is not trying, but
she also takes account for she has three to still take care of, she
is prioritizing our oldest as it should be, and I was not. She is
trying to get the hours that are needed to support our family and
still take care of everyone.
4. If you were to start over, what would you do differently?
How could I have helped or guided you?
I think if I were to start over, I would keep our list that we
made. I would communicate more with her on some of the
important issues. I always knew she wanted to work seven to
three so that she could still manage taking our oldest to therapy.
I just did not see it. I knew it but did not set in. I became
focused on money and income instead of her managing our
family still while working.

5. COACH - reflect on the questions and your perspectives.
I see things that she is talking about. I told her I would get a job
and her reply was “we never see you during the week why
would you want to do that” and it came down to the money.
This is why I am thankful that we had time away this weekend (
we joined the YMCA and we go put the kids in day care and
have time together) this was the conversation I think we needed
to have beucase I wasn’t seeing what she was. This has put us
on the correct path, whether it be nanny covering down to
appointments or her working the hours that are needed.
1. What is on your mind? It can be anything.
My wife and I have been talking about going back to Kentucky
to retire. We know that Texas has all these great opportunity for
work, school and thing to do for the family but we both have
jobs in KY and we really love it there. We are trying to hold off
on a decision until we are sure that TX will not work for our
family, but really, we can make it work and the schools are
better here for our kids. I guess were trying to hold off till we
are sure, but we know what is better for the kids, but if we do
not like it and we are just getting by day by day the living here
beucase its better for them is that really worth then being in a
place that we love and know we will be happy.
2. And what else? There is always more.
That really is the factors. If I were to go more into detail, we
must deal with traffic here, if we work on post or if my wife
gets a job at USAA there will be traffic. The communities that
are worth buying in are at least thirty minutes from post, this is
where the good schools are the squarest foot per home for your
money. In Ky we would not need to deal with traffic, and we

can live twenty minutes from post and have a good home, no
traffic and have jobs on post. We know what is best for the kids,
but do we sacrifice living somewhere that is ok to some place
we love for that. Normally of course its yes, we would always
sacrifice anything for our kids, but its not like the schools are
that bad in KY, so it comes down to what we really want to do.
This is retirement it comes with a lot more pressure then just a
pcs move.
3. What is the real challenge here for you?
The real challenge is the school are better, the actives are more
plentiful for the family, more things to do, closer shopping,
better living communities – VS – we love KY, we can get the
house we want, possibly have land, both have good jobs and
they are flexible with times and time off, kids in an ok school.
Cons are we are not sure if we want to retire in TX, its ok here
but doesn’t feel like home, KY had always felt like home, we
live the area, but TX holds better opportunity for us as a family.
4. How does this impact your goals?
This impacts nothing short term. We are still both going to
work, the kids are all going to be in school and we will be
taking in everything that TX has to offer. Long term it just
effects what type of home we are going to buy, how much we
have to save, where our kids will go to school, what collage
they will go into, where we want to retire.
5. COACH - You will hopefully see some patterns that tie back
into the foundation and the feed back loop. Are "life events"
mudding the water to achieve their goals. If so, what can be

done in your opinion? What are your observations? What
evidence are they presenting you? Words or actual evidence?
Our life events play a huge part in this. Beucase we have had
such a great experance in KY and we love the area, we love the
weather and the community we were apart of this is all playing
a huge factor and mudding the water beucase we are comparing
TX to this. We want the things we had there, but we also
understand we may never have that again. We are very strongly
connecting in Ky with good friends that have become family,
we have the jobs with these people, and we know that we could
happily live there for retirement. This is all our option, but we
share it. At the moment the only thing that we can do is sit
back, enjoy our new duty station see what it has to offer us,
spend the time here that we have and see if in the end it comes
around to us and we want to stay.
1. What is the progress of your GRREAT?
One of the best progress is that we are on the same page, we
have a time line set up and we are working towards that goal.
Instead of me pushing my wife I am working with her. She
understands the importance that I have placed on her with me
retiring in three and half years, and I understand the importance
of her still being a stay at home mother to our daughter and
finishing up school. We were both overlooking some key factors
in this coaching method beucase we both had goals in our own
head, with this method we have explored other ways, set an
expected time line that we can both work with and agree.
Coaching her has been great for both of us.
2. What is working? What is not working?
In the beginning I feel like even though I was coaching her, I

was trying to influence what I wanted on her and that was the
only thing that was important. You need to work I am getting
out. That was my mind frame. Though this coaching process I
was able to use my knowledge in the working field, my
leadership style to hear her, listen to her and understand her
perspective in this. Now as are moving forward she took my
advice to start to jot things down that she wants out of a job,
she has the luxury of time on her side so she can turn down
offers if she wants. She explained to me that it is going to be
hard to work considering our oldest has therapy twice a week
and the hours she needs are most of the time given to senor
employees. With this information I have coached her to stay
aware of jobs on post here, beucase she would have the option
of working from seven in the morning to three in the afternoon
and this shift would be perfect for her.
3. COACH - provide your feedback, suggestions or ask what is
the real challenge?
The real challenge that I have is over coming my own fear.
Even though I am coaching my wife, my biggest challenge is
not coaching her but over coming myself and I worry that she
will not have or get a job and I am going to have to be stuck in
any job that I can find when I retire. She always tells me she
will have a job, she does a great job in school and she has
updated her resume, she had taken steps that we talked about for
networking and she just applied for a part time job online with
Amazon today. She does what I suggest, and she seems to like
m coaching her, I feel that we have come along way and have
crossed many barriers that we both had because of
communication with this issue.
4. What did we each do, consciously or not, that led to success
or failure (think of the time line that you set, and make sure if
you know the answer - LET THEM say it.)

For our time line it is a one to two-year time line. Our children
will all be in school full-time next year. At this time for before
our time line has been set to really start looking and applying
for jobs. We have established that working on post is best for
the family, as the hours can be managed with school for the
kids, getting on and off the bus and therapy for our daughter.
This has led to great success beucase she has now gone form not
networking to networking. This is a very important step in
getting a job on post beucase they are hard to come by if you do
not know someone already in the GS system. We talked for a
long time if she should apply for USAA, they are a great
company that loves to hire Militray as well as have ad ay care
for our youngest daughter. The Bennifts are better, but over all
we both deiced our children go to school on post, the GS job
can transfer and the hours she needs to work are there.
5. Did we act on everything of which we were aware (ignored
clues, intuition)?
I feel a more open to coaching my wife, better now then when
we had first started. I can say that I had good intension, but it
was my intention. I ignored her intentions and feeling about her
working. When we started acting on this and it became open
commination instead of you should know and understand with
out me having to say, and it became about her and less about me
stressing over her working, the level of coaching became better,
it became more open and in the end we were able to clearly set
up goals, time lines as well as what is expected from a job she
wants together as a team.
6. Are their risks involved? If so, how can we avoid them?
The biggest risk we have is her not getting a job. Again, there is

a lot of emphases placed on this beucase of our situation, but in
retrospect we have the time and we have the expectations that
we have set up in this process. So, it is now about trusting the
process, she is graduating here in the next two weeks with
honors. She is doing everything I have coached her on, she is
aware of the risks, and she knows getting a job will avoid the
risks, she is on board and we are both doing what is best for our
family.
7. What was our role in co-creating these results? (personal
tendencies, behaviors, habits, etc.)
We had all kinds of roles, being a married couple, you will
always have personal feeling involved. You will want to please
your partner and not hurt their feeling by telling then something
bad they are doing, or something that you want them to do that
they are not doing (as they can feel like a failure) we hashed all
this our when I choice her to coach. She is a very logical
minded person she needs facts, she needs to see things and she
needs to know why that is her biggest thing that I have come to
see in coaching her is she has to know why, she needs to know
why things happen. So, in this because she needs to know how
are we going to plan for summers with the kids, is my entire pay
check going toward day care for them? These are viable concern
as we are still working on that we area also in agreement that
our needs should be met and that even with maybe her paycheck
going toward that in the summer, in the further this behavior
may be driving her into a higher paying job.
1. Goals to achieve (SMART) - truly discover if they are
specific, measurable and timely.
My goals are simple first create the bond. With this in tack I
would get more out of the person that I am coaching, they need
to trust me not only with the information they are sharing but
they also need to trust me with following my advice. I feel this

will come into play with all the tasks at hand. When we are
looking at goals to achieve as a coach, we want it all to work
out in the end, we want the best for the person, we want to see
them succeed and most off all we want them to come out better
then they were before coaching.
2. Roles - what role do you wish for me in relation to your
goals?
One of the first things I would do as a coach when we sit down
is list your goals, I want to know what you want out of the
situation. When we find out this information we can move on to
listing your goals, just write them down in any order it doesn’t
matter, because the next step that we are going to take is taking
each of those goals, putting them in an order of importance to
you not me then figuring out what will it take to tackle each
one. This is such an import part of the process, it not only put
the ideas in your head on paper so you can now see them, but it
now gives you a visual of what matters most to you and what
you think you can achieve in the time at hand. These goals all
now have weight they have now become measurable goals
whereas before they were an idea and something you wanted to
do but haven’t yet.
3. Resources - what resources are needed to help you?
The Resourses I would use are what is at hand, I want to spent
one on one time with you, I want to go where you go, I want to
get a feel for your life so that I know how to approach you, how
to deal with you when an issue comes up. I need you to keep a
journal I need you to be reasonable and keep track of your ups
and downs. This is a major resource, because now only are you
now reading what your feeling, your documenting it but you are
also expressing it even in writing and this helps to calm people,
it helps to understand triggers, it helps them to see themselves
in a different perspective.
4. Accountability - who else will hold you accountable?
Ideally at the beginning it is me. I don’t want anyone else in on
your journey unless you want them to be. If you are coming to

me to help coach you, then you are already having a hard time
holding yourself accountable
5. Timetable - make a deadline, if you do not, it simply will not
happen. Be realistic
You want to make a date, goal or deadline, but you also want to
think about what the person is you are coaching conformable
calling it. Do they want to call it a deadline, will they feel like
a failure if they so not reach it? I prefer a goal, lets write our
your goals set a time line you would like to complete these
goals at and together we are going to work on the them so that
these goals can be met, if we do not meet one of the goals we sit
down we reevaluate what is going on, the methods we are using
and if they are doing everything they have been asked to do in
order to compete these goals in a timely manor.
6. Empowerment - for yourself, the coach and others (How does
empowering you help others?)
When I am at my best, my life is in order. This may not happen
all the time but when you feel validated yourself you feel
Empowered. Confidence helps me to give you the best advice,
the best methods for coaching. I feel confidence tin my ability
to help others, I have a background of school, experance and
most of all dealing one on one with different types of people
with different issues they want help with. I want you to feel
empowered in your own life, and with knocking out goals, with
feeling better about yourself mentally and physically you will
become empowered and that is how my coaching will reflect in
you.
7. COACH ONLY QUESTION - what are your observations, do
you feel as though they will achieve the goals? Did you chime
in or lead the questions? What your method easy or hard? Do
you feel as though you were an effective coach in the

foundation phase?
Early on I identified my wife and the person I look to coach,
she is graduating with her BA in three weeks, she made a 3.94
GPA and will be graduating with honors. She is already self-
driven, but she has not worked since she became pregnant with
our oldest. This was nine years ago. She has been out of the
work force for quite some time and this is where I can help
coach and guide her. I always ask her what her goals are, I want
to hear them, I like that she tells me them and I want her to be
able to say them out loud not just think about them. I have
reached out to the people that I know that can help her with
information. I would say that my method is easy even though I
am there to coach I want the people I am working with to do the
work, they need to put in the work in order to come out on top.
They need to have self-realization in order to knock out the
goals that we set up. I feel this is very efficient method, I am
there for them, I am working though the issues with them, and
when we set up this foundation in the beginning we will be on
the same page. This helps both of us know what we need to do,
where the accountability will be, our time line will be as well as
it will be made clear if adjustments need to be made, they will
be its ok it doesn’t have to go by the book every single time.
Having this flexibility is good beucase from my experance you
are still holding them to time line but you’re not overwhelming
them with it needs to get done, if it doesn’t its ok we redirect
and tackle it again.
LEADERSHIP PODCASTS
Thinking about leadership and how to maximize my potential is
what gave me a more precise sense of choosing the podcasts
which are very interesting. To narrow down, the first episode
specifically coaches leaders on the different ways of how to
handle change which is an inevitable aspect of life in general
and organizations or businesses. It also discusses more relevant
questions from people in regard to leadership to help leaders

deal with change effectively by being flexible, accountable and
having a vision for tremendous success especially during
promotions. The second episode teaches leaders on how to co-
manage with peers and also discusses clear answers to a variety
of questions from people who experience organizational and
transition problems. This podcast teaches how individuals ought
to establish authority and credibility when managing peers
especially during promotions and all of the podcasts also
discuss leadership aspects on a cultural level which is efficient
intriguing for me to adopt.
There are various takeaways from the first episode 383 that has
the objectives of how a person can handle change from a
management perspective and a personal level. The host
mentions that change is an external thing that happens while
transition is the psychological process through which people go
through as they internalize new situations which bring change.
It mentions William bridges book titled transitions which
discusses how change begins with an ending whereby a person
recognizes what they are losing and learn to manage that
particular loss. After that there is the neutral zone which comes
after letting go whereby the old is gone but then the new is not
fully operational. Finally, there is new beginnings which
include new values, attitudes and understanding as individuals
establish new roles in understanding their purpose. The second
book titled leading transitions discusses things we should do as
leaders to go through transitions and how what we can do to
celebrate the small wins (Bridges, 2015).
The second article discusses how to co-manage with peers and
distinguishes management and leadership. Management is how
we handle complexity and leadership is how we handle change
and looks at caretaker versus rain maker in the same perspective
in an organization. One should have a caretaker and rain maker
in an organization to know what will be best for the
organization. People who get counter offers of different jobs
quit their jobs within 24 months. There are co expectations in
an organization, including quality control and there are different

frameworks that revolve around organizational results. There
should an on-sight and spending time with a peer to find out
how they are doing or responding to conflict to be aware of how
different leaders are handling different situations. This opens up
a chance for more awareness and how one can go as far as the
outcomes. Norms can be created in the work place like adapting
the no technology devices like phones which could help people
find their potential. Good listening to the struggles and being
part of the conversation is essential for achieving tremendous
progress and achievements. This will give people a gift that will
last for their lifetimes. It is good to have a discussion with the
team on where the organization is headed and creating
awareness why leaders are creating decisions better than others
at all times. While co-managing peers, a leader should be
sensitive of their situation, they should establish credibility, be
fair and maximize their strengths (Dave & Bonni, 2018).
To sum up, the podcasts will help me share what I have learnt
and keep learning as I mentor others as I pay attention of my
mind and affection my heart. This has also given me some of
the newest ideas necessary for me to outperform by engaging in
critical thinking through effective listening and knowing how
and when to delegate and how to manage conflicts (Dave &
Bonni, 2018). This will help me a leadership coach by helping
me think outside the comfort zone, build my goals around my
strengths and taking action to produce results as I create a
balance at the same time.
References
Dave & Bonni S. (2018) 383: How to handle change and more
questions Retrieved from: 2
https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/coaching-for-
leaders/e/57528993 Dave & Bonni S. 3 (2018) How to co-
manage with peers and more questions Retrieved from:
https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/coaching-for-
leaders/e/58553250 Bridges, W. (2015). Transitions: 4 Making
sense of life's changes. Da Capo Lifelong Books.

What do you wish to achieve?
With any type of coaching, I would like to achieve a bond
between me and the person I am looking to help. Stress can
mean many different things to different people as well as affect
them in many ways. Finding techniques can be hard, what may
work for one person may not work for others. The best thing in
my option is to first talk to the person, try and find out triggers
to stress, is it work, is it home life, is it kids, or loud noises.
After that find out how they normally deal with it, does it, does
it help or does something else need to happen in order to cope
better in situations.
2. Why is this important to you?
I like helping people, I am in a position of leadership. It is my
job to make sure that all my solders can operate under any
situation. This also means that I need to be the one to problem
solve, take their stress away, or help them deal with it in
manners that will help, be the ear that will be ready to listen if
they need, talk to them and give advice to them when needed.
Learning about coping methods help me to be a better leader as
well as a mentor. Being a leader is not always about knowing
what is right, it is not always knowing what is best, it is about
learning, gaining knowledge and being there to show others that
you lead by example and everyone can matter. It is important to
me beucase my guys need to feel comfortable coming to me
with issues, they need to know that I can help them so that our
team can operate as a team. I need them to do what I tell them
and trust me it is the correct action without question with this
comes trust, leadership and team work.
3. What have you done so far?
Over the past few years I have really changed my leadership
style it has been working very well. I have become more open to
suggestion, I still belive that being in a leadership position is a
responsibility and with that comes hardships. This will never
change, I am in a position where I dictate orders, we train where

they want to or not, they will do what I tell them but with that
comes my leadership style. I need to be sympatric at time, I
must be able to be flexible, to be willing to change if I can.
There is always something going on in other people lives and at
time I need to tell them yes you can take off to handle it or no
you can not you are needed here. I have done my best to hear
out all the information and make the best decision based on the
needs of the individual.
4. How has it worked/not worked?
I feel like it has worked very well for me. I do sometimes butt
heads with others but when I feel like I am right, or I know I am
I was put in the position of leadership for a reason and I need to
stand my ground. I think I have become a more flexible leader,
a better leader by finding God and faith that drives me to want
the best for others. I am more understanding to other situations,
but most of all to me being a leader mean giving my best and
having others around me that belive in me and want to do their
best helps me to do the best for everyone.
5. What do you need from me? (based off of this question, you
will help guide the course in the next log)
I have asked myself this question, I need to know what others
expect from me so that I can alter my leadership style. I have
recently started a new job here at Fort Sam Huston. It is
organized chaos to me right now. There are many people
leaving, people that are trying to leave, this creates a stressful
environment to begin with as new people entre and others leave.
The job is not an easy one and we need the senor personal to
educate the new push coming in. I need to learn and understand
the job quickly so that as new ones come in, I can be there to
teach them and try to elevate the stress in the department.
What are you trying to achieve?
I am trying to achieve a guidance and support system for my

wife as she has been out of the work force for some time raising
our children.
Why is this important to you?
It is important to me in a lot of ways, the first being I want her
to success in anything that she does. She is unsure of getting
back into work and I want to make sure she knows that she has
the support she needs to help guide her.
What have you done so far?
I have talked about how it will affect our family, we have talked
about day care in the summer as well as the benefits that we
would have finically
How has it worked? How has it not worked?
She knows and understands all the Bennifts. It is hard for her
not to see herself at home with the kids and paying just for day
care in the summer is a draw back for her. It comes down to is it
worth not having any extra income while she is working full
time in the summer beucase her pay check will go towards our
child care.
What options do you have going forward?
She wants to work, so she has a few options. She applies for a
job at USAA and after a year they may offer her a stay at home
position. That way she would not have to travel, she would save
money on work clothes as well as no day care in the summer
beucase she can work the off hours and I can watch them. Her
other option is getting a job on post and just suck up the cost
over the summer for the long-term investment into her future.
What input would you like from me?
We have talked about all the pros and cons, I think that she
values my option, and this gets us further into a conversation
where we can be honest about all of it with each other.
What is your "go forward" plan?
As of right now we have time on our side. Our youngest is three
and at four she can go to school full time on post for free. We
are leaning towards getting a job on post beucase of the hours.
She is able to work a 7am to 3pm shift, we need these hours
because our oldest goes to therapy after school and that needs to

come first.
How can I support you?
I support her by being there, I may have a bigger want her to get
a job then she does, she sees a different side her priority for the
past nine years has been our children, and our oldest in therapy
is a huge priority. Her separating from the kids for a long
period of time, I see her working and brining in money. She
sees a more complex view of her working and I need to support
that with her.

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