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A Buffyverse Apocalypse: Prologue
1. A Buffyverse Apocalypse: Prologue
Starring Joss Whedon (The Sim Version)
By RoseFyre
---
I do not own Joss Whedon or any of the characters in the Buffyverse. This is not meant to be an accurate
representation of Joss Whedon in any way, shape, or form.
3. "So, why did you call me here? Meeting new people is great, but you-"
"Seemed to have something specific in mind? That's because I did."
"What, exactly?"
4. "Well, I was hoping you would found a Legacy for me."
"A what?"
"A Legacy. See, Joss, I'm a big fan of your TV shows, and your other work, and I was trying to think of a theme for
my new Legacy, and I thought of you. I was hoping you'd be willing to be my founder."
5. "What exactly would be involved in being a...Legacy founder?"
"Oh, not much," I said. I discreetly crossed my fingers down by my hip. He didn't notice. "You'd have to get married,
and have a family. At least two kids, an heir and a spare, but that's easy enough."
6. "What about money?"
"What about it?"
"Are you giving me any to start this...Legacy?"
"I can only give you $500 - it's the standard. But the dorms at UC Sunnydale don't cost anything, they supply you
with food, and if you set out some musical instruments in the dorm, the dormies will play them and you can collect
their tips. You also get a grant every semester, for getting good grades. The better the grades, the higher the grant.
There's plenty of other ways to make money, too, and you're smart enough to figure them out."
7. "And you're going to be recording this?"
"You'll occasionally hear a voice from above - that's me. Another form of me, really. She'll take pictures."
8. He thought about what I was saying. "And you chose me, specifically, for this?"
"Yup," I said brightly.
9. "One thing you should know - I'm not all that into working."
"Unfortunately, you're going to have to have a job. Even if you make a significant amount of money in college, you'll
need a plot of land, a house, and at least two kids. Still, if you work hard, you won't have to work for very long." This
time I crossed my fingers behind my left elbow.
10. "So why should I do this?"
"There's a lot of benefits. Best friends, money, family, a recorded life - lots of sims live their lives without anyone
recording them. Lots more never really live at all. I can't guarantee you fame, but I can guarantee that someone else
will follow the story of your life. Like a TV show - the better it is, the more people will watch."
11. "And," I added, "you'll find love. That much I can guarantee you, without a doubt."
"I'm interested in Knowledge," he said. "I don't really feel a need for love."
"You don't, now, but you will later." I smiled mysteriously. "There's a lot of women around here, and I have
suspicions about which ones will be right for you. Trust me when I say that you'll find someone, and you'll get full
choice in who that will be."
"Full choice?"
"Well, I know you like hardworking women, and I'd rather the woman you married had a good job. So within that
group, yes, you'll get to choose - and they're the ones you'll prefer anyway."
I didn't let him know just how much I was attracted to him. Changing my turn-ons and turn-offs was becoming a very
high priority.
12. "What about ghosts? I, er, have a fear-"
I laughed. I couldn't help it. "You write Buffy, and Angel, and Firefly, and are scared of ghosts?" I quickly calmed
myself down. "Don't worry, you won't have to deal with ghosts. Your kids will, but you won't."
13. "So, are we good?" I asked. "Sunny skies ahead?"
"Yeah," he said, after a moment, "I'm in. I'll start a Legacy for you."
15. As Joss headed out, he wondered why my house was built quite so oddly. Shrugging, he decided that it wasn't
important if I was eccentric.
16. When he was gone, I went up to my bedroom and relaxed on my brand new bed. All was good - he hadn't realized I
wasn't signing him up for a Legacy.
No. I was signing him up for an Apocalypse.
17. When Joss got to UCSD and moved into Stevenson Dormitory, he claimed his room first thing. All of the rooms were
the same - containing a bed, a dresser, and a light - but he wanted one in a good spot.
He also locked his door, so the other dormies couldn't get into his room when he wasn't there.
18. His freshman year was pretty boring. He skilled, routinely rolling up the want to Stargaze with a Telescope every
single evening.
19. He wrote his term papers, managing to achieve a 4.0 in his chosen major of Literature every semester.
20. And he occasionally worked as a barista at the Los Angeles Community Center.
Usually, though, he spent most of his time there meeting people, and catching up with old friends.
21. Joss realized very quickly that I was right, and the dormies would happily play his instruments for hours, making him
a significant amount of money.
22. "I get to clean toilets and showers? Woot!"
Sometimes he had odd habits.
---
This would be due to his personality - since he's going to have to live in an Apocalypse, probably without lifting
Medical, I wanted him to have max Neat, so he'd get the most benefit from washing his hands. His personality is
10/3/4/0/8. He's a Virgo.
23. About halfway through his second semester, Joss discovered that he'd made friends with three members of the UC
Sunnydale Secret Society.
"You'll never get away with this!"
"I'm a policeman, Mr. Whedon. You have been found guilty of mooching off of dormies. Please come quietly. And
peacefully."
Joss sighed. "Fine."
Of course, he didn't realize the truth until after he'd been interrupted while he was exercising, handcuffed, and
dragged to the Society's headquarters. They gave him a jacket and a tour, but he decided there wasn't much to see,
and he preferred his Hawaiian shirt anyway, so he quickly returned to his dorm.
24. After that, he realized the value of friends, and started spending more time meeting people.
Lynne Fitzgerald, in the bowling shirt, was one of his first crushes. She was a Business Tycoon.
---
I decided, eventually, that I'd rather lift some other restrictions first. Also, I wasn't enthusiastic about marrying in a
Gemini Fortune Sim first thing.
25. Claire Page was another of his crushes, but as she was only a Detective, and Law Enforcement can only be
suppressed until Law is lifted, I didn't let that go any farther.
26. That was also when he realized just how much he liked me.
"Are you sure we can't be together?"
27. "C'mon, other me. I really like him. Three bolts!"
---
Unfortunately, my simself is playable, and thus not eligible.
This is when I changed his turn-off to brown hair, and her turn-off to facial hair.
They still have two bolts. Knowledge/Family. Sigh.
28. Joss also influenced people to help him with his term papers, so he didn't actually have to go to class. He felt a bit
guilty, until he realized that the other people in his dorm almost never did their own work, and that they were
perfectly willing to help when he asked.
Also, finding out that the police really didn't care if others helped with his work made him less inclined to do it
himself.
29. Around the end of his sophomore year, he maxed all his skills, using a combination of regular skilling, skilling with a
Thinking Cap, and pulling skills from others using the SimVac.
---
As I'd been lucky enough to roll Max All Skills as his lifetime want, this also made him permaplat. I was very happy.
30. After he'd maxed all his skills and made a significant amount of money, Joss decided to go on vacation. He'd met a
couple of women he liked, but he wanted to spend some time away while he decided which one he liked best.
31. He visited all three vacation sites, spending time digging for treasure,
37. And he also spent a lot of time catching up with his friends at home, keeping those relationships up.
At least, he spent a lot of time keeping up with his friends with high-level jobs. Especially in useful career fields.
38. When he came back, Joss brought a voodoo doll with him, and used it to make even more friends.
39. He also taught all of his friends - and some of the people he didn't even know all that well - to hula.
40. Since he'd maxed all his skills, and keeping up with his schoolwork wasn't difficult, Joss began a new project. He
decided to learn how to arrange flowers, and he quickly achieved mastery of the art.
41. Eventually, he found the right woman for him: Eloise Carter, a Mad Scientist. She was a Cancer Family Sim, and even
though not all of their turn-ons matched, they shared three bolts.
I completely approved.
42. Eloise, thank you for coming on vacation with me."
"Thanks for inviting me," she said, somewhat shyly.
"I, um, I like you. A lot."
She looked up at him. "Me too. I mean, I like you. A lot. And we've had some great dates." She tentatively reached
her hand forward to caress his cheek. "I'm really happy to be here with you."
43. In order to get away from the awkwardness a bit, Joss decided to teach Eloise to hula. While she never became an
expert at it, she did enjoy watching the way his body moved.
44. One day, after Eloise went swimming, Joss kissed her lightly. When he stepped back, he stared into her eyes and saw
the same thing he knew shone in his. They'd fallen in love.
45. That evening, over a meal of hamburgers, he nervously asked her to marry him.
49. "Are you sure about this?"
"Don't you want a hat that matches your jeans? And I like you without the glasses." She looked up at him. "I can see
your eyes better. I like looking into your eyes, Eloise."
"I like looking into yours."
---
At this point, I realized I'm really bad at recognizing sims' features. I'd thought Eloise had the Remington Harris face,
then the Meadow Thayer face. It turns out she has a custom downtownie face. Not that it matters, really.
Also, I changed his turn-ons to blond hair and makeup, which lowered his chemistry with my simself a bit more, since
she's hardworking, but not blonde.
50. "Hey, Rose, thanks for making me not date your, um, physical self."
"Who are you talking to, honey?"
"Rose. She's a friend of mine, and, um, a voice."
"A voice?"
"Hi, Eloise," I said.
"Oh. That sort of voice."
51. "Are you sure you're alright with this? Starting a Legacy with me? Living on a small amount of money?"
"I'm sure, Joss."
He took her in his arms and kissed her soundly.
52. Unfortunately, getting serious with Eloise meant making sure that other women realized that he was with Eloise. He
didn't mind hurting Marguerite Morton's feelings - as they weren't all that close - so that breakup went well.
53. However, he wanted to remain friends with Lynne, so he tried to make that breakup less painful. She walked around
with flamey thought bubbles starring Eloise for a while, though.
54. Joss and Eloise spent a lot of time together, often at the Los Angeles Community Center. Mrs. Crumplebottom was
not a big fan of their relationship, but she didn't actually do anything until they woohooed in the photobooth.
55. I think this picture speaks for itself, don't you?
---
At this point, Joss began rolling up the want to Have Public Woohoo With Three Different Sims. I was not happy - I'm
pretty sure I yelled "You're not a Romance Sim!" at the computer a couple of times - but since he was already
permaplat, I was able to ignore the want until it went away.
Which it did. Eventually.
56. By this point, Joss had finished his classes, graduating with a 4.0, and he decided to turn his attention to mastering
another skill. He found fishing to be enjoyable, and it gave him time to talk with his friends. In addition, he was able
to sell the fish he caught.
57. Just before leaving for his new home, Joss decided to take another vacation, taking Eloise with him yet again. They
returned to Lihue, to the same room they'd stayed in the last time.
Joss enjoyed the pirate ship, climbing to the crow's nest, walking the plank, and meeting the ghost.
58. Eloise preferred to lay out in the sun.
---
I was not happy about her getting stared at by Joe Grundstrom, who's a bit of a jerk in Di's Victorian Legacy. Luckily
for him, staring was all he did.
59. However, while they enjoyed spending time out and about, they spent most of their time in their room, dating,
dancing, and woohooing.
60. When they returned, Joss held his graduation party.
He spent by far the largest part of his time with Eloise.
61. "Smile!" I said.
They turned towards me and struck a pose.
"That's a great one, thanks guys!"
62. "You know, your head's half in the pillow."
"Oh, just come woohoo with me already."
Eloise looked around, to see if anyone was paying attention, then decided she just didn't care and jumped onto the
hammock with her fiancรฉ.
63. When the party was over, Joss turned into an adult.
An adult wearing a kilt.
"I am so getting out of this as soon as I get home," he said.
---
I actually didn't mind the outfit all that much - at least it matches.
64. He got into the taxi, looking forward to his new life.
65. "So you haven't told him he's in an Apocalypse yet?"
"Um, nope."
"I'm glad I won't be around when he finds out."
"Sure you don't want to be in a Legacy?"
"Nah, I'd rather have immortality playing SSX3. Pleasure Sim."
"Right."
---
This is Ayala Smith. She's placeholding the pictures in Joss's old dorm.
66. Have some amusing pictures while I tell you a bit more about my Apocalypse.
(Yay invisible dormies!)
67. Basically, I decided that the founder is Joss Whedon, and all of his descendents will be named after Buffy/Angel
characters. Locations will be named after places that appear in Buffy/Angel - and vacation destinations have been
renamed to real life places. Joss will realize he's in an Apocalypse early in Chapter One, as you probably figured out.
This version of Joss is a Virgo Knowledge Sim, who is permaplat. As I said, his fiancรฉe Eloise is a Cancer Family Sim,
and she luckily has a job-related lifetime want. Still doesn't mean she'll get it, though, since that depends on the jobs
that come up in the paper.
They have a very strong three bolts, which is more than he has with anyone else, since I changed his turn-ons and
turn-off.
68. I'd like to thank all the people at boolprop.com for being so encouraging, and if you don't go there, you totally should!
It's a great community.
