Hello, I go by Corey Rhodes. Several years ago I was experiencing many mental issues in my life. To cope, I started writing and producing content as an outlet to deal with everything that was going on. Over time I decided to open a blog and release what I was experiencing hoping that others would relate to what I was going through. Now, I release several things such as short stories, poetry, photography, and drawings and so much more. The world is a scary place and I aim to help others to gain a realization that mental illness affects more people than you think.

1. A Poets
Realization of
Numbness

2. New Story

3. Life sometimes changes for the worst or the better. It
doesn’t matter which other than the fact it changes. I’ve
lived a whole life scared of the unknown not knowing that
the unknown itself was what I was scared of. Unknowing
the unknown unwillingly.
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4. But this is what I do know. It’s been a while since I looked
in the mirror and looked at myself and truly questioned
myself. Why am I this way? So I did just that. I looked at
myself and acknowledged my crooked smile and my
fractured state of mind. I wish I was healthy both mentally
and physically and I couldn’t help but think that does
anyone?
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5. I doubt I am alone but maybe everyone has this realization.
Maybe everyone is afraid to look at themselves in the mirror
and no I am not talking about that look you give yourself as
you wash your hands. To truly look through the skin and the
hair and wonder what makes you, well you.
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6. I was drunk one night and this has been something I have
been doing less and less as I get older. I looked at myself in
the mirror and I didn’t quite know what it was but something
was off. I looked no less than I do currently—sober—yet
something was uncomforting about my appearance.
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7. I looked closely to my face and I could visually see that I was
numb though I looked exactly the same as I do everyday. I
looked into my soul and I realized that this is in fact what I
didn’t want to be. I felt uncomfortable in my shoes on how I
looked at myself and I felt ashamed at what I had done. I
saw the true me.
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8. Trying to keep the demons at bay by self medicating
through alcohol. I was alone when I looked at myself and I
told myself that if I was to drink again, I would not do it to
numb my senses to keep my overbearing thoughts away
but to have fun and bond with my friends.
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9. Drinking alone ruins you. Drinking to feel less will destroy
you. Drinking to run away from something will demolish you.
Pick up a new habit but always acknowledge that when you
replace a addiction, it gets replaced with another. Theres
things we like and things we don’t like. Do the things you like
that wont destroy you or make you depressed when you look
at yourself.
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10. When I started this blog I didn’t like who I was. You could see
it in my writing but I kept writing. It made me feel good.
People read my thoughts and they liked them. They
complimented my poetry or my writing and thats why I came
back. I was lost chasing other things that didn’t really matter
to me. Writing poetry. Writing music. Drawing, taking
pictures. Art.
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11. Thats how I express myself and I don’t have to do it drunk or
stoned or any other way that involves a unclear mind. When
you see someones release, compliment it. Comment or like it
or whatever you want to do to give acknowledgment to the
creator. “This got me through a hard time and you made me
see the light.” This is what I want to see.
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12. I would like my followers to vocalize their likes and dislikes
more. Do it on my blog if you have to. My blog still has room
to grow and if it involves people becoming the best human
they can be, then do it.
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13. My name is Corey Rhodes and I want to change the
world.
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14. Keep In Touch

15. Thank You
www.lifeofadyingpoet.com/a-poets-realization-of-numbness