personal statement drafts

1. Personal Statement Drafts
Georgia Dodsworth

2. Personal Statements
A personal statement is a written description of the
your achievements and interests. Personal
statements are often used when applying for
university or college. Your personal statement is the
candidates chance to show the university who you
are, and why you would be a good applicant to the
specific course that you are applying for. In your
personal statement you will talk about your skills, past
experiences and different opportunities that you have
experienced.
When writing your personal statement it is important
that you avoid mentioning any specific universities,
this is due to the fact that only one personal
statement is to be wrote and generalise the course
that you are doing. A personal statements key role is
to showcase yourself and why you would be suitable
for the course..
As said previously you should avoid mentioning
specific universities as your personal statement will
no longer appeal to the other universities that you
have applied for if you have applied for multiple.
There is also a specific structure that should be
followed when writing a personal statement, this
should be as followed:
20XX presentation title 2
First paragraph- Introduction
• Explain why your interested in the course
• Show your passion for the career pathway it would
lead to
• How would the course support your future
Second Paragraph- The Course
• What skills you have gained from your course and
how
that helped in choosing the university course
• Mention different topics/ units tat are relevant to
your
degree
Third Paragraph- Work experience/ Placement
• Discuss skills that you have developed through
different,
placements and work experience
• Give details of the placements and how you
gained skills
relevant to your chosen degree
Fourth Paragraph- Other Experience/ about yourself
• Volunteering/ employment/ fundraising
• Skills and different skills that have been gained
throughout these experiences- show relevance to
the chosen degree
Fifth Paragraph- Conclusion

3. 20XX presentation title 3
FIRST DRAFT
When uploading my first draft of my
personal statement, I hadn’t fully
completed the structure of my first
draft. I then sent this draft to my
lecturer to gain some improvement
feedback on my first draft. In this
draft I had included more information
about how my part time job had
helped me gain skills rather than my
course. I also didn’t include enough
information about why I would be the
best candidate for the chosen
degree in my conclusion. I also had
to condense a paragraph to make
sure I stayed in the character limit.
Lecturer feedback

4. 20XX presentation title 4
This is the second draft of my
personal statement which I
checked thoroughly through each
paragraph with my lecturer to
ensure that I was including the
right information that would be
needed. However in my
conclusion I had still not put into
enough detail on my conclusion
and why the university should
chose me. I then received
feedback from my lecturer and
how to improve that paragraph.
Although it was the similar
feedback off the previous draft I
received support from them in
class. When considering the past
feedback I received I condensed
down a few of the paragraphs and
spoke more about my course
rather than my job.
SECOND DRAFT
Lecturer
Feedback

5. 20XX presentation title 5
After taking into my feedback I added more detail to
my conclusion to allow universities to see why I am
the right candidate for my chosen degree and make
it sound more catered to my course. This allowed
me to complete my third and final draft, taking out
irrelevant information that as taking up my character
limit. Once I had gone through it with my tutor and
lecturer to ensure that it was up to standard. As well
as this improvement I also added more relevant
information to my fourth paragraph to appeal more
to my chosen universities.
FINAL DRAFT