Thus in ideal parenting, the child’s caretaker will be employing Parent and Adult resources appropriately, while still not discounting her own Child. As the child grows, the parent will provide him with what is needed to complete each stage of development.
2. Prepared By
Manu Melwin Joy
Assistant Professor
Ilahia School of Management Studies
Kerala, India.
Phone – 9744551114
Mail – manu_melwinjoy@yahoo.com
Kindly restrict the use of slides for personal purpose.
Please seek permission to reproduce the same in public forms and presentations.
3. Symbiosis and script
Thus in ideal parenting, the
child’s caretaker will be
employing Parent and Adult
resources appropriately, while
still not discounting her own
Child. As the child grows, the
parent will provide him with
what is needed to complete
each stage of development.
4. Symbiosis and script
At each stage, the child
acquires more and more of his
own resources, and so has less
and less to lean on the parents.
Ideally, the parent encourages
the child in this appropriate
separation, while continuing to
provide support in the areas
where the child still needs it.
5. Symbiosis and script
In this ideal process, the
initial intense symbiosis
between child and parent
is progressively broken.
The final result is that by
the time the child reaches
young adulthood, both
parties are relating
without symbiosis. Each is
able to stand
independently, making or
breaking contact at will.
6. Symbiosis and script
The trouble is that there are
no ideal parents. No matter
how good a job Mother and
Father make of parenting,
every child goes through the
process of development
with some needs unmet
along the way.
7. Symbiosis and script
This fact reveals the script
function of symbiosis in
adult life. Every symbiosis is
an attempt to get
development needs met
which were not met during
the person’s childhood.
8. Symbiosis and script
As always with scripty
behavior, the person in
symbiosis is using outdate
strategies in his attempt to get
needs met. These strategies
were the best he could work
out as a young child, but are
not longer appropriate in
grown up life.
9. Symbiosis and script
In symbiosis, the person
is discounting grown up
options. The discounting
is outside his awareness.
10. Symbiosis and script
Whenever we get into
symbiosis, we are
unwittingly replaying old
childhood situations where
we felt an unmet need.
11. Symbiosis and script
We once again set up the
relationship that existed in the
past between ourselves and a
parent or parent figure, and re
run the situation in an
attempt to manipulate the
other into satisfying the need
which was not met.