Many guys have trouble setting boundaries in relationships because they want affection. However, it is important to communicate boundaries so others understand what is and isn't okay. One should listen to their gut feelings and mention politely but firmly when something makes them uncomfortable. This establishes boundaries and allows one to find a partner who genuinely respects them.
3. Partly because most guys aren't
getting nearly as much affection as
they want, when they start getting it,
they'll put up with a lot of junk to keep
it.
4. The trouble with this is when she's
violating you're boundaries, and you
don't say anything, she correctly
assumes that it's OK.
5. One of the big myths about
boundaries is that people somehow
"know" what they are without you
saying so.
6. Like there's some kind of social
contract that everybody has read and
agreed to that regulates what's OK and
what's not OK.
7. But the harsh truth is that people will
do whatever they think is appropriate,
based on what they want, and what
they imagine the repercussions will be.
8. And when it comes to male-female
interactions, what people think are
appropriate are largely based on how
they were raised, parenting issues,
early childhood experiences, and tons
of other stuff that you simply will
never know about.
9. Which means if you're making
assumptions about how she "should"
act, you're setting yourself up for a
letdown.