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The Russo Legacy Chapter 1.2
Welcome back, everyone. This is the second installment of the Generation One chapters. If you don’t know who the people in this picture are, why don’t you read the Introduction and first chapter. That should get you up to speed. “Alright, Robin. Let’s try this again. If you multiply a number by two, you are…?” “Making it bigger?” “Yeah…but I was looking for the word ‘doubling’.” “Oh. Whatever.” Robin, you are going to flunk the second grade. I swear…
Is there an opening in the gamer career track? “Yes, actually. I’m going to be a Noob.” I wish I was getting paid to play video games. I’d be rich if that were the case.
Alright, try and get promoted! Do your best, Feebs. “Thanks, Jared! I’ll be home at six.” Shoutout to the skunk hanging around back there.
“I don’t want to study, Jared. This is boring…” Yeah? So is your face. “…” Just for a few more minutes, okay? Then you can do whatever you like. “Nah, I’m gonna go mess with Lyra.” Ugh…please don’t.
Robin! What did you do to her!? “Nothing! I swear. I just came in here and stuck my tongue out at her and she started crying. What a baby.” Robin, she is a baby. You probably scared the living daylights out of her. “It was just a silly face!” Your face is already silly… “What was that?” Nothing… Man, she’s creepy looking. Her hair makes her look like the ghost from the Grudge.
A short time later… “Lyra, do you know how your bunny can talk and move by itself?” “How, Robby?” “Don’t call me that—ahem. It’s haunted! The ghost of a social bunny was condemned by Grim himself to forever make animal noises and be tortured by children!” I’m pretty sure Lyra only understood only two words you just said. Stop watching those Ghost shows, idiot. I have poor decorating skills…the floor is the exact same color as the wall 
“Hi, Mommy!” “Hey, honey. Did you help daddy out with Lyra?” NO. “Yes, I did!” Iris, she’s lying. Your youngest daughter is going to have nightmares now because she believes her bunny is haunted. “Oh, please, Jared. Robin doesn’t know any ghost stories…” Iris, have you ever seen the movie The Bad Seed? Seriously, I wouldn’t be surprised if Robin killed a person by the time she’s a young adult.
(We don’t eat regular meals around here) “Phoebe, were you serious when you said I probably won’t win the inheritance?” “Yep.” “But…some people actually like me!” “Robin, you have one friend.” “You only have one friend too, that stupid Ocean kid.” “Ocean is not stupid. He’s smarter than you could ever attempt to be.” Burninate.
“Seriously, Robin, you’re going to have to show some initiative if you want people to vote for you.” “Whatever, Phoebe! I AM going to win.” “Okay, Robin.” Fact: Robin doesn’t know what the word initiative means. Opinion: Robin is a “psycho killer, qu’est-ce que c’est” Random statement: I remember why I picked that hairstyle for Robin…it hides her stupid evil face! Man, I’m gonna be pissed if she’s gorgeous when she’s a teen….
… I don’t even trust her in her sleep. Alright, this isn’t the Robin show, let’s go check out something more interesting.
Hey, look, it’s Ocean Shahan in teenager form. I wonder why I put so much effort into making him a teenager… “Hey, Phoebe! I haven’t talked to you in a while!” “Uh…h-hi, Ocean. What are you doing here?” “Well, I just figured I hadn’t seen you in a while, so I thought I’d stop by.” “Oh..” Phoebe’s shy :D
“Actually, there’s this new monster movie out. It’s about this werewolf, and he’s all ‘RAWR!!’ and the girl he’s in love with is like ‘AHH!’. It’s pretty cool. Um…I was wondering if…maybe…you know…you’d like to…” Man this guy is worse than me… “You want me to go see it with you?” “Yeah, that’s right!”
“Sure, I’d like to go with you. So who else is going?” *palms face* “Actually, I was kind of asking you out on a date…” “Oh…heh…a date?” To break this moment of awkwardness, I’m going to shout obnoxiously. HI IRIS AND LYRA!!!!
“Phoebe, I really like you as more than a friend…” “I like you too, Ocean.” Obviously she can see past the fact that he wears socks with sandals. What is he, my Grandpa? And what’s with the leather jacket? What is he, like nerdy momma’s boy rebellious? Is that even possible? Well, that’s what Phoebe likes. She’s two-bolting it with him.
Look at you, Phoebe! Getting all bold, and such. But for some reason, I want to kick Ocean’s ass right now. Phoebe’s like the sister I never had 
“I have to go, Phoebe. I’ll call you tonight?” “Yeah, sounds good.” Doesn’t she look happy? I think she looks ecstatic! Then, of course the one person that senses happiness has  to come and ruin it. Who would that be, you ask?
Robin the Terrible. “Ooooh, Phoebe! You kissed a boy!” “Robin, were you spying on me!?” “No, I just happened to be at the window for an extended period of time, looking in your direction.” Such a brat…
“I’m telling Daddy that you kissed a boy!” “Robin, you’re just jealous.” “Why would I be jealous?” “Because you know that when you’re my age, it would have to be an APOC ALYPSE for someone to kiss you. But, maybe I’m wrong. Maybe you’ll find some desperate guy who has no sense and will lower his standards to be with you.” Ouch. That was harsh…and I don’t even like Robin.
“Phoebe, that was so mean!” “See how it feels? Maybe you should stop being so mean to others.” “You’ll regret your words!” Phoebe, you remember that you share a room with the devil, right?
“So, who’s this River kid?” “Daddy, his name is Ocean.” *ignores* “Who is he?” “He’s a boy…in my class.” Joe, you are so inattentive. She’s been friends with the kid since she was a child.
“Maybe one night he can come over for dinner. See what this kid is about.” “Fine, Daddy.” They act so much alike…it’s creepy.
Robin: “So when’s Phoebe’s boyfriend coming over?” Joe: “Whenever Phoebe asks him.” Robin: “I say we put him through various tests and background check him!” Phoebe: “You’re going to have to go through various tests and background checks in order to get a job.” Lyra: “Hahahaha!” Lyra doesn’t know what’s going on. I just felt she should be included.
Robin: “Well….you smell like rotten lunch meat!” Phoebe: “And you’re a cheesehead!” “You’re hair’s frizzy!” “At least mine isn’t sloppy and messy like yours!” Joe: “Alright, that’s enough. Nobody smells like lunch meat or has a cheesy head. And nobody has frizzy or sloppy hair. Eat your dinner.” (Iris ate lunch meat sandwiches with Phoebe, and mac and cheese with Robin. She just puked a lot with Lyra….ew, imagine the insults…)
“Goodnight, Lyra…make sure the ghost of the bunny doesn’t pull your pigtails as you sleep!” Robin! Stop scaring Lyra! Jeeze, go to bed already.
Next day! How are the grades looking, Robin? “B minus.” It’s better than a C. “But it’s not an A plus. I’m never going to be as smart as Phoebe.” Got that right.
Oh, hey, Iris does exist! “Okay, Robin, you’re going to have to bring your grades up. And stop yelling out in class…and being mean towards your classmates.” “But mom—” “No, Robin. No buts. There’s no excuse for you to be so belligerent towards your teacher and classmates.” “They’re all ass faces!” O__o Excuse me for a second…. *goes outside to die of laughter*
“Excuse me? Robin, what did you just say?” “…” “Robin, we do NOT talk like that. EVER. You understand me? Where’d you even hear that? Because Phoebe doesn’t talk like that and neither does your father, or me.” I’m sorry, Iris, are you really that shocked? Your daughter is bff’s with the DEVIL.
“I’m sorry.” “Robin, I know you’re outgoing and you prefer to talk instead of listen, but the teacher is there to help you learn. Therefore you listen to her.” “Yes, Mommy.” “And I don’t want any more bad words coming from your mouth. You understand?” “Yes.” In one ear, and out the other. Just wait until she becomes a teenager.
“I know you can be good, Robin. You just have to try.” No. She literally has NO chance of being a good person. Ever. “Jared, you’re not helping here.” I know that. :D
Alright! Look at the house’s first Overachiever! “Thanks, Jared.” I don’t understand the Gamer career at all, but hey, if that’s what you want to do…so be it.
It’s Lyra’s birthday. She exists still, don’t worry. Iris is at work 
Interesting that she grew up in BLUE pajamas. I’m about to prove to all of you that the Powerpuff Girls thing was fated to happen. *FLASHBACK!*
Phoebe is the equivalent to Blossom. Blossom’s color? PINK. Lyra is the equivalent to Bubbles. Bubbles’ color? BLUE. Robin is the equivalent to Buttercup. Buttercup’s color? GREEN. MY GAME IS FREAKY LIKE THAT. Alright…I’m scaring myself for no reason. Now I feel like someone’s standing behind me. D:
See what I told you about Robin trying to kill people? You’re probably thinking, “They’re just having a pillow fight. That’s what girls do for fun because they don’t play-fight like guys do.” WRONG. Stop thinking like that!
THIS is the face of a killer. Look at the bloodlust in her eyes! She’s wicked! Okay, so maybe I’m over exaggerating how crazy Robin is. But she really isn’t that nice.
Phoebe finally got her own room. It’s bittersweet, really… Because while Phoebe is safe from Robin murdering her in her sleep, Lyra is now in danger. “Jared, Robin’s not that evil…” I know…but until she proves to me that she’s a good person, I will forever think her to be an evil child. And evil children frighten me. Like that one girl from the movie Orphan….or Veda from Mildred Pierce.
First day of school for Lyra!  “Hehe, yeah!” AWWWWWWW!! She giggled and then she answered in the affirmative! Isn’t she the cutest little thing ever? (But Phoebe and the Penguin are still my favorites…)
“So Phoebe, what college are you thinking of applying to? I hear La Fiesta Tech is a pretty fun college!” (Hence it’s name.) “Mom, I’m not really into the whole…’party school, let’s get wasted’ type of thing.” As a respectable person such as yourself should be. “Well, you don’t have to give in to that…”
“I was actually considering Sim State…” “Sim State’s good! Yeah, go Llamas!” Iris, when did you become a lame mother? Your hairstyle and clothes are too cool for you to be acting like this…
“What about that vaguely French college?” “The really expensive one? I don’t know…” “Sweetie, you have scholarships. I think you should apply at Acedemie Le Tour.”
“Yeah, but wherever I go, Robin and Lyra have to go. That should be funny…Robin at Acedemie Le Tour.” “I’m sure she would adjust. Besides, she would have her big sister looking out for her. And you never know…Robin just might straighten out by then. She just has middle-child angst or something. You get attention because you’re so smart, and Lyra is so cute…not saying Robin isn’t cute. Robin’s just not as…delicate as you and Lyra are.” “Ha, you can say that again…”
Ricky likes Phoebe. Phoebe likes Ocean. Ricky likes anything Phoebe likes. Ricky likes Ocean. O__o
“I DID IT!” You learned how to copy off of your neighbor? “NO! I got an A all by myself!” Took you long enough… Iris: *muffled* “That’s good!” There’s a 33% chance she means the cookies she’s eating.
“My teacher gave me a C…”*cries* Awwww! Lyra, don’t cry! It’s okay. Big Brother Jared will help you get caught up in school! Don’t worry. You’ll be an A plus student in no time! “You promise?” I SWEAR ON MY LIFE!! You’re such a cute child! I want to give you cookies and stickers and a kitten! Never grow up you adorable little person! *Jared has clearly lost his mind…that Mall Santa is to blame for not giving him a baby sister when he was six*
“I am such a lucky man to be married to you, Iris.” “And to think I hated your guts…” “I’m sure you still do. But even if you did…it wouldn’t matter. As long as you show some feeling towards me.” “Then I hate you with all my heart.” *winks* “And I can’t stand to look at your face…” Then they made out……I’m working on writing romance, okay? I’m working on it! By generation five, I should be a pro at it!
“Hand over the secret, or I’ll shoot those ducks right off your pajamas, you stupid Powerpuff Girl!” “I will never tell you, Mojo Jojo!” “Tellllll meee!” “No, you’re a bad little monkey Mojo!” “Tell me the secret, Bubbles! For I am Mooooo-Jo Jojo! And if you do not tell me the secret, the secret that I, Mojo Jojo, does not know, I, Mojo Jojo, will have to harm you, who has the secret that I, Mojo Jojo, want from you, a Powerpuff Girl!” Remember how Mojo Jojo rambled on and on for no reason?  Seriously look up any Mojo Jojo rant…you’ll see how redundant and repetitive he is.
They all started hanging out in the morning before school autonomously.  Lyra initiated it with Robin…and then Phoebe joined in. They were talking about kissing…I’m sure Phoebe started that up. Phoebe:“Ocean is taking me on a date soon. I bet he’ll kiss me again…” Lyra: “I can’t wait to date. It sounds so romantic!” Robin:”More like romant-ICK! Bleh!” Hey, I randomly agree with Robin on this one.
Later on after school for Phoebe… “Orlando, I’d love to help you with tonight’s history homework, but I simply can’t. I’ve got work in an hour and….well, I’m kind of starving.” “Oh. Okay. Well…that’s cool, I guess. So…you and that Ocean kid are just casual right?” “Orlando, we’re going steady.” “We are!?” “No…Ocean is—you know what? How about you go home?” Jocks. Are. So. Stupid.
“Alright, well…uh…I’ll call you tonight or something?” “No, that won’t be necessary, Orlando. Um…I’ve got to do something tonight.” “Ohhhhh…so you and Ocean ARE serious, eh? EH?!” *suggestive laugh* “No! That’s not—” “Seeya, Phoebe!” Feebs, get ready for some serious rumors tomorrow. “I hate stupid people….”
Ew…who are you? “I’m Robin’s friend!” You look oddly happy about that fact.
“You’re really good at playing Mary Mack, Andre.”  (his real name is like…Andrejejleejlrjskxk or something, and I can’t…I just cant keep typing that out. I dub thee Andre.) “Just something I learned on the playground. No big deal.” *smug* “You’re so cool…” “What?” “Uhm…I mean…I said, I wish we had a pool…it’s hot!” Robin, it’s almost winter…
“Well, I gotta get going, Robin. It was fun hanging out with you!” “Okay.” “I’ll save you a seat on the bus tomorrow.” “O-okay.” “Uh…Robin?” *snaps out of it* “Huh? What?” “Er…nothing. Bye!” I’m feeling disturbed. Let’s cut to a random picture that has no relevance!
Alright, back to the story… Iris: “Robin, sit in your chair correctly.” Robin: *grumbles* Joe: “So how was school, girls?” Lyra: “I picked flowers with Ms. Keen!” Iris: “That’s lovely, Lyra. Oh, Robin? Who was that boy you were with?” Robin: “Um…just some kid who followed me home. These sandwiches are good, by the way!” Hmm…nervousness and subject changing….I think Robin likes Andre Pons! (yep. That’s his last name.)
Takin’ out the trash, takin’ out the trash………AT NIGHT. “Do you have nothing else better to do with your free time than to watch old SpongeBob reruns?” No, I don’t. But the fact that you knew that was from SpongeBob says something! AHA! “It says I have kids who watch cartoons nonstop.” Yeah and—oh…wait a minute….I feel schooled. D:
“Jared! I got a good grade! I got a good grade!” AWWWWWW! Of course you did! Who could give a bad grade to such a cute little kid like yourself!? I’m going to give you cake and pink things and a fuzzy teddy bear named Mr. Snuggles and then you can get a puppy! “You said kitten yesterday…” You can have both! :D (I’m lying, we might just get the kitten.)
Robin’s becoming a teenager… Everyone, lock your children and small pets up. Because she will eat them. Then regurgitate their bones and leave it on your doorstep. Phoebe: “Ew, Jared…that’s graphic.” Eh…sorry. I unwillingly say Happy Birthday Robin….yay.
…. “I’m kinda cute, aren’t I?” I’m not allowed to answer that. “But you call Lyra cute all the time!” Because she’s a cute child…things change when you become a teen.  “So you’re not going to call Lyra cute when she’s a teen, then?” Fine! You look…c—cute. There.  Now stop being an idiot and go skill or something. “Teeehehe!”  Ugh. That laugh. Robin rolled pleasure, just like Phoebe. Makes more sense with Robin, though.  She wants to become a celebrity chef. I wouldn’t trust her near my food, but whatever…
Those are some industrial looking boots… “Robin, where did you get that outfit?” “The mall…?” “Which store?” “Why, Daddy? Do you wanna dress like me or something?” “No. Just making conversation.” *continues to read while humming* Joe, she was being a brat…not…*sigh*…honestly, the parenting skills on that one.
“So…who were you talking to last night on the phone?” *quickly* “Ocean. Uh, your move.” “Ocean Shahan. You know, he sounds like a decent kid, from what I’ve heard of him.” “Yeah, he’s…neat.” Haha…neat? That has to be code for something, right? Phoebe isn’t that nerdy…
“Just stay away from those Picture taking booths, and hot tubs…and cars at night. And pretty much any double bed, stay away from that….” “Daddy, what are you getting at…?” “JUST WAIT, OKAY?!” “Um…Dad…Ocean’s a knowledge sim, I believe…that’s the farthest thing from his mind.” “Yeah? Well, your mother’s a knowledge sim, and I wouldn’t say she’s not a feisty—” “Okay, Daddy?! Stop. Ocean and I are not serious like that. We haven’t even made out—” “Alright! It’s your move…” …….Ayydubyakaydubyaayyarrdee
(That’s Andre all grown up…sort of) “Robin, what’d you invite me over here for?” “I told you, I had something to ask you…I’ll be right back. You stay here.” “But why?” “I just have to make sure my little sister gets inside…I have to deliver a message, of sorts.” “Uh…fine?”
Why is she sitting on the couch…that looks all suspicious for no reason. “Hey, Robin! Are you watching me until Daddy gets home?” “Uh, yeah. Hey, listen…I’ll give you five simoleons if you don’t tell Mom or Dad I’ve got a boy over, okay?” “A boy…of course not! That’s so romantic! Like Romeo and Juliet!” “Eh..not exactly.” How dare you make such a cute child do your dirty work! HOW DARE YOU!!
“Man, little kids are so easy…” “Haha, in what way?” “Well, I’m not supposed to have boys over when my parents aren’t home…” “Oh…interesting. So…can I see your room?” Robin…pause before you play. Sarah Palin’s daughter taught me that on an MTV PSA commercial. Mhm. She did. :D
“Oh, and what do you want to see my room for?” “Well…I don’t know…a little makin’ out, perhaps…?” Robin, abort the mission! I repeat, abort the mission! I don’t like the look in his eyes right now! “Oh, so you want to make out, huh?” Robin is going to corrupt Lyra. I can tell. She’s going to make Lyra bad and then this whole legacy will crumble. Iris is gonna die of a broken heart and Joe will go into aspiration failure…I need to sit down…oh wait..I am sitting…
“I knew you liked me…I knew it the first time I talked to you.” “Huh?” “Admit it. You want to go out with me, don’t you?”
“Go out with you? Yeah right, Robin. Now come on, and let’s get this make out session over with…” “Wait…you don’t….?” “Robin, don’t make me laugh…you didn’t seriously think I wanted you?” “Sorry, but I did.” Oh, no….Robin, I told you….
“I seriously thought I could do this for 100 simoleons, but…you’re just….I’m sorry, you’re not attractive to me at all! I guess I’ll just have to tell the guys on the soccer team I couldn’t do it.” “They made a bet about whether or not…that’s—How could you even agree to something like that?!” “Because I knew it would be easy. I knew you liked me. Easy 100 simoleons right there…but….I just can’t lead you on. Then people will think we’re dating. That’s just too weird. I mean, what about my reputation? Sorry, but 100 simmies is not enough to risk my social life. ” Robin…please don’t make that face… 
“I’ll see you at school, Robin.” *walks off* Robin: *mumbling* “You idiot….You idiot, stupid jerk. Such an…ass face!” (I thought Iris told her not to say that. It makes me laugh when she says that.)
A few hours later… Uh…Robin? “What?” *wince* Um…are you okay? “I’m fine. Stop asking me stupid questions…” Well…I just thought that maybe you’d be upset— “I SAID I’M FINE!” Alright…
“Oh, hey Robin! How’d your secret date go?” (Lyra, now’s not the time to be cute….) “You wanna know how my secret date went?” “Yeah!” “Fine. I’ll tell you. I killed him. With my bare hands. Then I cut up his organs and put them in the spaghetti in the fridge. Does that answer your question, you stupid, optimistic little brat?” “I-I…was just…j-just…aaasssskkiiiiinnnng!” *starts to cry* Robin, you idiot…
When Phoebe got home from work… “Robin, why was Lyra in my room, crying?” “Because…I called her a stupid optimistic little brat…” “Why do you tease her all the time! Goodness, Robin. It wouldn’t kill you to be nice, you know.” “Okay. Here’s a thought. How about you figure out that some guy that you liked only wanted to make out with you because people were gonna pay him to do it.” “…Robin, did that happen with Andre?”
“Yeah. So what? I don’t care.” “Robin, it’s alright to be—” “I said I don’t care, Phoebe. Jeeze. You were right, okay? It would have to be an apocalypse for a guy to wanna kiss me.” “Robin, I didn’t mean that. I was just—” “Teasing me? You know what? Eff this stupid legacy! If I have to fall in love with some stupid guy, then I don’t want the inheritance. Lyra or you can have it. Jared can just put me on the ballot as a joke. Freakin’ hate romance!” “Robin…you’re just mad. You’re gonna want it when we go to college…” Poor Robin…wait? Phoebe, you’re talking about the inheritance when you say “it”, right? Right? Phoebe?!
(Saturday morning…) Joe: “….Doll face...mhmm….what day is it?” Iris: “It’s Saturday…we get to sleep in…” “Oh….” …………… Joe: “Wait…WE’RE GOING ON VACATION TODAY!” Iris: “Oh my—HOW DID WE FORGET!!?” And how did I not know that…
“Vacation day, vacation day!” “Stop, Phoebe! That tickles!” “Hahaha!”
“Yippee. Vacation day.” You could sound a bit more excited, you know…
Lyra: “Robin, how can you not be excited to go to Twikii Island?  Phoebe: “Because she’s a soulless monster?” Haha! Good one, Feebs! “No, it’s because it’s super early, and I just know everyone’s going to be over the top happy there.” Phoebe: “Happiness isn’t such a bad thing, Robin. And you never know, you might actually have a good time.” Yeah, if she tortures all the islanders.
“All right, everyone! The shuttle is on it’s way. Make sure you have everything.” I’ve had Bon Voyage for a while now, and I still haven’t taken any of my sims on a vacation. Guess it took a legacy to make me want to do that. I didn’t even plan to do this…I just started playing and I was like…I’m bored. Let’s go on vacation. Wish I could do that in real life.
Lyra: “I’m so excited!!” Robin: *mocking* “Ooh, I’m so excited, la lala!” Phoebe: “Stop acting so immature, Robin…”
“I really wish Ocean could come...” Hah. Ocean going to the ocean. That’s funny. “Not really. It’s just a bad pun.” Thanks.
“Daddy, make sure I get shotgun!” “Honey, I’m riding shotgun…” “But Daddy!” “It’s so I can make sure the driver gets us to the airport safely.” Whatever, Joe. You know you just want to ride in the front seat because it’s better.
“Momma, wait for me!” “Darling, we’re not leaving you.” “But my suitcase is too heavy!” “Just take your time, Lyra.”
“Oomph…I can’t—urg—open it!” Awww! It’s because she’s small. Robin: “You’re doing it wrong! It’s a sliding door, stupid!” Lyra: “Oh! Heehee!” Even her mistakes are cute! :D
A few hours later… “Ugh, it’s so hot…” Why are you wearing a sweater, still? “Because it was cold on the—shutup, Jared. I don’t feel like talking to you.” Yikes.
“Welcome to Twikii Island, sir. My name is Neil. How many rooms do you need to book?” “Oh just two. One with a double bed, and another with two separate beds. Also, could you add an extra bed to the large suite?” “Of course, sir. And how many nights will you be staying?” “Two nights.” “Very well. Your rooms should be ready within half an hour.” “Thanks!” “At your service, sir. If you need anything, do not hesitate to call.”
“Mom, it’s so beautiful here!” “I know, baby. We just figured we’d get away from the Moon Islands for the weekend. You girls have been working so hard at school and skilling.” Translation: Joe and Iris wanted to get away from work and spend the weekend woohooing with each other while the girls had fun at the beach and swimming in the pool.  Joe and Iris really don’t care how hard the girls work by this point, they just want them to hurry up and go to college. I may or may not have just guessed on whether or not that’s what Iris meant. Confusing sentence! Wooo!
“Hey, neighbor! Hang loose!” “Huh?” “It’s the local gesture! I’ve been vacationing here since I was out of college. Just thought I’d get to know the newbies at the hotel!” “Um…okay?” “My name’s Goopy!” *gags* “No no, Kimbrell. Goopy Kimbrell.” Oh. Okay. Phew….almost threw up all over the keyboard again…
“Mr. Kimbrell, stop scaring the vacationers.” “I’m just greeting them, Lauren.” Lauren is the maid.  I like the French Maid outfits better….but that’s just me. 
“Hey, Neil? Smile!” “Oh, okay, Miss Russo.” *smiles* “Great.” “May I ask why you took my photo?” “Ehh…You know. Just in case…” “Er…Just in case what, Miss Russo?” *Robin leaves* “Miss Russo?” Neil, it’s perfectly normal to be afraid.
“Too hot for you, Joe?” “Heh…not hot enough…” I don’t want to know what he means by that. Ever.
“You seem to be very tense in your shoulders, Miss.” “Yeah, I don’t really have that much time to relax.” “I see that you’re the oldest of your sisters, correct?” “Yeah..and Robin is the worst to look after. She’s always so stupid when it comes to decision making. Not to mention she has a horrible temper.” “Ah. I see. Well, I see to it that this massage completely relaxes you. Just forget all about those troubles of yours, Miss.” I feel like taking a nap….I wish I was getting a massage.
“That’s it everybody! Do the hula!” Lyra took it upon herself to form a mass hula dancing circle. And everybody loved it because she’s so darn adorable! Old guy: “I haven’t gotten to dance like this in ages!”
Robin: “Timla!” Phoebe: *breaks the surface* “Turn-ohh!” Robin: “Timlaaaa!” Phoebe: “Turno!” They’re playing….Marco Polo. Sims style.
Hula Dancer: “That’s right girls! Shake what your momma gave you!” Robin: “Phoebe, what is she talking about?” “I dunno, just follow her moves!” Lyra: “She means your hips!  Hula Dancer: “That’s right, little one! Shake those hips!”
“Oh wow, this place is so cool!” “Why yes, sir, it is! Would you like to go on a tour?” “Never mind the tour! Can I take your picture?” “What for?” “I’ve never seen a hairless gorilla dressed as a tour guide and standing upright for so long! The guys at work aren’t going to believe this! And you can talk!” “….” “So how about that tour?” *sigh*
How was the helicopter ride? “It was so beautiful! Except for Joe trying to look for more hairless gorillas…*sigh*” Anything else? “Ah, yeah! I found a map to some secret hut. Joe said we should take the girls and check it out.” What time is it? ADDDDDDVENTURE TIME!! Mysterious hut, mysterious hut!! Sorry, this is my first time playing Twikii Island…
“Wow…Daddy, what is this place?” “I don’t know…It’s so big and…jungle-y.” “You think somebody lives there?”
Most likely considering there’s a mailbox and a trashcan. Seriously, EA? A mailbox!
Iris: “Robin, did you really have to come in your bathing suit? What if the Twikii Island’s king lives here? Robin: “Then this is a ramshackle palace. I’m sure some crazy old dude probably just lives here….or….a ghost!” Lyra: “A ghost?” Robin, stop trying to scare Lyra!
“Don’t worry, Lyra! I’ll battle the ghost! Chaaaarrrggeee!!” Joe and Iris: “ROBIN! Get back here!” Robin: “I wanna be an airborne ranger, I wanna lead a life of dangerrrr!” That’s from the Breakfast Club.
“Gaaahhh! Stupid microwave! Casting spells on me! I’ll cast a spell on you, stupid Microwave!” Haha, he’s so withdrawn from society that he believes the microwave casted a spell on him. This, my friends, is the Witch Doctor! Not technically a ghost…
“I am sorry, kind visitors! I cannot entertain you when my house is in such a spell! I must retreat. All of these…’appliances’ have turned on me! I don’t believe anyone can help me…” “Well, Mr. Witch Doctor—” “Call me SIR!*” “Sir…uh…I’m pretty good in the mechanical skill. I could fix up your home for you. If you’d like?” “….A mere mortal, such as yourself! HAH! Don’t make me laugh.” *leaves* *That’s from Ferris Bueller’s day off :D
“What did he cut the wire for…I’m pretty sure this man caused more damage trying to fix these things…” Uh…what is that puddle from? “Oh it’s from the…um…wait, the dishwasher doesn’t leak when it’s broken…” Oh, gross.
Lyra, as adorable as you look right now, I’d stay out of the puddles around here.
“Stupid mortal man. He thinks he can fix those magical items. He’s so naïve. He’s what the villagers call ITAKUMASHI!” (I literally just made that up…)
“Do we really have to stay here until Daddy fixes everything?” “Yes, Phoebe. Your Dad is doing a good deed for this…insane man.” “I guess…”
“YUUSSSSS!!! I proved my manliness by repairing common household items!” Joe, you’re frightening me. “Lyra, go tell the Witch Doctor I succeeded!”
“Mr. Witch Doctor!! Mr. Witch Doctor!!” Awww! She’s running and it’s cute!
“What does little girl want?” “My daddy is finished repairing your house!” *snorts* “No mortal can repair those things!” “Well…I don’t know what a mortal is….but my Daddy fixed everything!” “All right, little girl. I’ll be there soon. Run along.”
“So you have fixed everything! That is amazing! Surely you are magical!” “No, Sir. I am a mortal, like you said.” “Impressive.”
“I was thinking of using this on the man that sold me these appliances, but I have no use for it now…” “Oh, thanks, Sir. What is it?” “Shhh! I cannot tell you! But be careful of it. Make sure it does not get into the wrong hands. For they will have power over anyone! It’d be very wise of you to never touch it yourself. The temptation to control others is very hard to dismiss when you hold this item.” Alright.
So the Russo family left the Mysterious Hut  and the Mysterious man. Lyra: “Robin, stop walking so fast! I don’t wanna be last!” Robin: “Stop being such a brat, Lyra. I was joking about the ghosts.”
A few minutes later… “Momma, do you think the Witch Doctor will be okay on his own?” “Of course, Sweetie. He’s gotten by just fine it seems. Your dad helped him out really well.” “I still worry about him. What if he doesn’t get enough food?”
“I am not sure spaghetti is supposed to taste like a burnt piece of firewood…” Yeah, he’s getting by just fine…
Robin: “So, Daddy! Can I have that doll he gave you?” “As if he’d give it to you, Robin…Daddy’s most likely going to sell it, right?” Joe: “I might. Or just give it to whoever gets the inheritance.” Robin: “And now I suddenly want to win the legacy vote again!” You evil person…
(Midnight…) Robin: “Five thousand. Tops.” Lyra: “That’s a lot…” Phoebe: “Shutup, Robin. There are way more stars in the sky than just five thousand.”
“Phoebe, do you think aliens are lonely?” “Huh? I don’t know…why do you ask?” “Well…because they always want to come to our world. But they can’t. So they send their babies here.” “I never thought of it like that.”
Robin: “No, they’re just trying to take over Simnation.” Phoebe: “I thought that was you.” “Ha. Ha.” Lyra: “Do you think they like bubble baths?” Robin: “Of course. Who doesn’t?” Phoebe: “True.” Based on an actual conversation I had while stargazing. O__o
Absolutely no babies, guys!
The next day! “So, Lyra, what do you want to do today?” “I wanna go to the beach!” Yeah, good idea Lyra!
“Joe, are you coming with us?” “No, you and the girls have fun. I’m just going to catch up on some reading.” He’s reading a book about a guy who maxed his mechanical skill and his wife constantly complimented him on his manliness. Joe’s a strange guy.
“Say cheese, Jared!” Not if I make you say cheese first! And now a vacation montage! Listen to that one Beach Boys song Do it Again if you want! (that was from Happy Feet :D )
“Your abs are amazing!”
“Phoebe! Come out here!”
“Hey, beautiful, are you single?”
“No, but we can be friends!” “Uh…I guess.” Phoebe doesn’t realize the affect she has on teenage boys. And she’s not a Romance sim…so it’s pretty amazing how many guys are attracted to her. It’s also pretty amazing how many I want to beat up because of it. That’s the end of the montage, by the way!
Time passed and pretty soon it was time to go back to the Moon Islands where winter was slowly rolling in.
Robin: “Seeya, Hairless Gorilla man!” Iris: “Robin, he’s not a gorilla!” He looks like one… Lyra: “Guys! Wait for me!”
“That was pretty fun, wasn’t Robin?” “Yeah, sure.” “Admit it, you had a good time.” “Only because those fire dancers had smokin’ hot bodies.”
“Robin, can you please not do that.” “Don’t worry, Mom! I’m a pro!” Not exactly…
“OWWW!!” “Robin, are you okay?” “Yeah, just peachy! Except my buns are on fire!!” Okay. Here’s some more questioning. Sims know how to stop drop and roll (or in this case, rub their butts against the ground) when they catch fire doing the fire dance. But if they catch fire trying to be fancy with the Baked Alaska or cooking, they just dance around. Does that make sense? NO.
It’s Lyra’s birthday, everyone! Why are you not clapping? START CLAPPING. The most adorable child is growing up!  But unfortunately we will have to end right here for this chapter…because this one is pretty long. I made a choice to either focus on the girls at their teen years towards the end of this chapter, or go on the vacation. I chose the vacation, obviously…So the next chapter will be out like a day after this one. That will show how Lyra turned out and everything and the rest of the teen years. Hope this was entertaining to some extent!

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The Russo Legacy: 1.2

  • 1. The Russo Legacy Chapter 1.2
  • 2. Welcome back, everyone. This is the second installment of the Generation One chapters. If you don’t know who the people in this picture are, why don’t you read the Introduction and first chapter. That should get you up to speed. “Alright, Robin. Let’s try this again. If you multiply a number by two, you are…?” “Making it bigger?” “Yeah…but I was looking for the word ‘doubling’.” “Oh. Whatever.” Robin, you are going to flunk the second grade. I swear…
  • 3. Is there an opening in the gamer career track? “Yes, actually. I’m going to be a Noob.” I wish I was getting paid to play video games. I’d be rich if that were the case.
  • 4. Alright, try and get promoted! Do your best, Feebs. “Thanks, Jared! I’ll be home at six.” Shoutout to the skunk hanging around back there.
  • 5. “I don’t want to study, Jared. This is boring…” Yeah? So is your face. “…” Just for a few more minutes, okay? Then you can do whatever you like. “Nah, I’m gonna go mess with Lyra.” Ugh…please don’t.
  • 6. Robin! What did you do to her!? “Nothing! I swear. I just came in here and stuck my tongue out at her and she started crying. What a baby.” Robin, she is a baby. You probably scared the living daylights out of her. “It was just a silly face!” Your face is already silly… “What was that?” Nothing… Man, she’s creepy looking. Her hair makes her look like the ghost from the Grudge.
  • 7. A short time later… “Lyra, do you know how your bunny can talk and move by itself?” “How, Robby?” “Don’t call me that—ahem. It’s haunted! The ghost of a social bunny was condemned by Grim himself to forever make animal noises and be tortured by children!” I’m pretty sure Lyra only understood only two words you just said. Stop watching those Ghost shows, idiot. I have poor decorating skills…the floor is the exact same color as the wall 
  • 8. “Hi, Mommy!” “Hey, honey. Did you help daddy out with Lyra?” NO. “Yes, I did!” Iris, she’s lying. Your youngest daughter is going to have nightmares now because she believes her bunny is haunted. “Oh, please, Jared. Robin doesn’t know any ghost stories…” Iris, have you ever seen the movie The Bad Seed? Seriously, I wouldn’t be surprised if Robin killed a person by the time she’s a young adult.
  • 9. (We don’t eat regular meals around here) “Phoebe, were you serious when you said I probably won’t win the inheritance?” “Yep.” “But…some people actually like me!” “Robin, you have one friend.” “You only have one friend too, that stupid Ocean kid.” “Ocean is not stupid. He’s smarter than you could ever attempt to be.” Burninate.
  • 10. “Seriously, Robin, you’re going to have to show some initiative if you want people to vote for you.” “Whatever, Phoebe! I AM going to win.” “Okay, Robin.” Fact: Robin doesn’t know what the word initiative means. Opinion: Robin is a “psycho killer, qu’est-ce que c’est” Random statement: I remember why I picked that hairstyle for Robin…it hides her stupid evil face! Man, I’m gonna be pissed if she’s gorgeous when she’s a teen….
  • 11. … I don’t even trust her in her sleep. Alright, this isn’t the Robin show, let’s go check out something more interesting.
  • 12. Hey, look, it’s Ocean Shahan in teenager form. I wonder why I put so much effort into making him a teenager… “Hey, Phoebe! I haven’t talked to you in a while!” “Uh…h-hi, Ocean. What are you doing here?” “Well, I just figured I hadn’t seen you in a while, so I thought I’d stop by.” “Oh..” Phoebe’s shy :D
  • 13. “Actually, there’s this new monster movie out. It’s about this werewolf, and he’s all ‘RAWR!!’ and the girl he’s in love with is like ‘AHH!’. It’s pretty cool. Um…I was wondering if…maybe…you know…you’d like to…” Man this guy is worse than me… “You want me to go see it with you?” “Yeah, that’s right!”
  • 14. “Sure, I’d like to go with you. So who else is going?” *palms face* “Actually, I was kind of asking you out on a date…” “Oh…heh…a date?” To break this moment of awkwardness, I’m going to shout obnoxiously. HI IRIS AND LYRA!!!!
  • 15. “Phoebe, I really like you as more than a friend…” “I like you too, Ocean.” Obviously she can see past the fact that he wears socks with sandals. What is he, my Grandpa? And what’s with the leather jacket? What is he, like nerdy momma’s boy rebellious? Is that even possible? Well, that’s what Phoebe likes. She’s two-bolting it with him.
  • 16. Look at you, Phoebe! Getting all bold, and such. But for some reason, I want to kick Ocean’s ass right now. Phoebe’s like the sister I never had 
  • 17. “I have to go, Phoebe. I’ll call you tonight?” “Yeah, sounds good.” Doesn’t she look happy? I think she looks ecstatic! Then, of course the one person that senses happiness has to come and ruin it. Who would that be, you ask?
  • 18. Robin the Terrible. “Ooooh, Phoebe! You kissed a boy!” “Robin, were you spying on me!?” “No, I just happened to be at the window for an extended period of time, looking in your direction.” Such a brat…
  • 19. “I’m telling Daddy that you kissed a boy!” “Robin, you’re just jealous.” “Why would I be jealous?” “Because you know that when you’re my age, it would have to be an APOC ALYPSE for someone to kiss you. But, maybe I’m wrong. Maybe you’ll find some desperate guy who has no sense and will lower his standards to be with you.” Ouch. That was harsh…and I don’t even like Robin.
  • 20. “Phoebe, that was so mean!” “See how it feels? Maybe you should stop being so mean to others.” “You’ll regret your words!” Phoebe, you remember that you share a room with the devil, right?
  • 21. “So, who’s this River kid?” “Daddy, his name is Ocean.” *ignores* “Who is he?” “He’s a boy…in my class.” Joe, you are so inattentive. She’s been friends with the kid since she was a child.
  • 22. “Maybe one night he can come over for dinner. See what this kid is about.” “Fine, Daddy.” They act so much alike…it’s creepy.
  • 23. Robin: “So when’s Phoebe’s boyfriend coming over?” Joe: “Whenever Phoebe asks him.” Robin: “I say we put him through various tests and background check him!” Phoebe: “You’re going to have to go through various tests and background checks in order to get a job.” Lyra: “Hahahaha!” Lyra doesn’t know what’s going on. I just felt she should be included.
  • 24. Robin: “Well….you smell like rotten lunch meat!” Phoebe: “And you’re a cheesehead!” “You’re hair’s frizzy!” “At least mine isn’t sloppy and messy like yours!” Joe: “Alright, that’s enough. Nobody smells like lunch meat or has a cheesy head. And nobody has frizzy or sloppy hair. Eat your dinner.” (Iris ate lunch meat sandwiches with Phoebe, and mac and cheese with Robin. She just puked a lot with Lyra….ew, imagine the insults…)
  • 25. “Goodnight, Lyra…make sure the ghost of the bunny doesn’t pull your pigtails as you sleep!” Robin! Stop scaring Lyra! Jeeze, go to bed already.
  • 26. Next day! How are the grades looking, Robin? “B minus.” It’s better than a C. “But it’s not an A plus. I’m never going to be as smart as Phoebe.” Got that right.
  • 27. Oh, hey, Iris does exist! “Okay, Robin, you’re going to have to bring your grades up. And stop yelling out in class…and being mean towards your classmates.” “But mom—” “No, Robin. No buts. There’s no excuse for you to be so belligerent towards your teacher and classmates.” “They’re all ass faces!” O__o Excuse me for a second…. *goes outside to die of laughter*
  • 28. “Excuse me? Robin, what did you just say?” “…” “Robin, we do NOT talk like that. EVER. You understand me? Where’d you even hear that? Because Phoebe doesn’t talk like that and neither does your father, or me.” I’m sorry, Iris, are you really that shocked? Your daughter is bff’s with the DEVIL.
  • 29. “I’m sorry.” “Robin, I know you’re outgoing and you prefer to talk instead of listen, but the teacher is there to help you learn. Therefore you listen to her.” “Yes, Mommy.” “And I don’t want any more bad words coming from your mouth. You understand?” “Yes.” In one ear, and out the other. Just wait until she becomes a teenager.
  • 30. “I know you can be good, Robin. You just have to try.” No. She literally has NO chance of being a good person. Ever. “Jared, you’re not helping here.” I know that. :D
  • 31. Alright! Look at the house’s first Overachiever! “Thanks, Jared.” I don’t understand the Gamer career at all, but hey, if that’s what you want to do…so be it.
  • 32. It’s Lyra’s birthday. She exists still, don’t worry. Iris is at work 
  • 33. Interesting that she grew up in BLUE pajamas. I’m about to prove to all of you that the Powerpuff Girls thing was fated to happen. *FLASHBACK!*
  • 34. Phoebe is the equivalent to Blossom. Blossom’s color? PINK. Lyra is the equivalent to Bubbles. Bubbles’ color? BLUE. Robin is the equivalent to Buttercup. Buttercup’s color? GREEN. MY GAME IS FREAKY LIKE THAT. Alright…I’m scaring myself for no reason. Now I feel like someone’s standing behind me. D:
  • 35. See what I told you about Robin trying to kill people? You’re probably thinking, “They’re just having a pillow fight. That’s what girls do for fun because they don’t play-fight like guys do.” WRONG. Stop thinking like that!
  • 36. THIS is the face of a killer. Look at the bloodlust in her eyes! She’s wicked! Okay, so maybe I’m over exaggerating how crazy Robin is. But she really isn’t that nice.
  • 37. Phoebe finally got her own room. It’s bittersweet, really… Because while Phoebe is safe from Robin murdering her in her sleep, Lyra is now in danger. “Jared, Robin’s not that evil…” I know…but until she proves to me that she’s a good person, I will forever think her to be an evil child. And evil children frighten me. Like that one girl from the movie Orphan….or Veda from Mildred Pierce.
  • 38. First day of school for Lyra! “Hehe, yeah!” AWWWWWWW!! She giggled and then she answered in the affirmative! Isn’t she the cutest little thing ever? (But Phoebe and the Penguin are still my favorites…)
  • 39. “So Phoebe, what college are you thinking of applying to? I hear La Fiesta Tech is a pretty fun college!” (Hence it’s name.) “Mom, I’m not really into the whole…’party school, let’s get wasted’ type of thing.” As a respectable person such as yourself should be. “Well, you don’t have to give in to that…”
  • 40. “I was actually considering Sim State…” “Sim State’s good! Yeah, go Llamas!” Iris, when did you become a lame mother? Your hairstyle and clothes are too cool for you to be acting like this…
  • 41. “What about that vaguely French college?” “The really expensive one? I don’t know…” “Sweetie, you have scholarships. I think you should apply at Acedemie Le Tour.”
  • 42. “Yeah, but wherever I go, Robin and Lyra have to go. That should be funny…Robin at Acedemie Le Tour.” “I’m sure she would adjust. Besides, she would have her big sister looking out for her. And you never know…Robin just might straighten out by then. She just has middle-child angst or something. You get attention because you’re so smart, and Lyra is so cute…not saying Robin isn’t cute. Robin’s just not as…delicate as you and Lyra are.” “Ha, you can say that again…”
  • 43. Ricky likes Phoebe. Phoebe likes Ocean. Ricky likes anything Phoebe likes. Ricky likes Ocean. O__o
  • 44. “I DID IT!” You learned how to copy off of your neighbor? “NO! I got an A all by myself!” Took you long enough… Iris: *muffled* “That’s good!” There’s a 33% chance she means the cookies she’s eating.
  • 45. “My teacher gave me a C…”*cries* Awwww! Lyra, don’t cry! It’s okay. Big Brother Jared will help you get caught up in school! Don’t worry. You’ll be an A plus student in no time! “You promise?” I SWEAR ON MY LIFE!! You’re such a cute child! I want to give you cookies and stickers and a kitten! Never grow up you adorable little person! *Jared has clearly lost his mind…that Mall Santa is to blame for not giving him a baby sister when he was six*
  • 46. “I am such a lucky man to be married to you, Iris.” “And to think I hated your guts…” “I’m sure you still do. But even if you did…it wouldn’t matter. As long as you show some feeling towards me.” “Then I hate you with all my heart.” *winks* “And I can’t stand to look at your face…” Then they made out……I’m working on writing romance, okay? I’m working on it! By generation five, I should be a pro at it!
  • 47. “Hand over the secret, or I’ll shoot those ducks right off your pajamas, you stupid Powerpuff Girl!” “I will never tell you, Mojo Jojo!” “Tellllll meee!” “No, you’re a bad little monkey Mojo!” “Tell me the secret, Bubbles! For I am Mooooo-Jo Jojo! And if you do not tell me the secret, the secret that I, Mojo Jojo, does not know, I, Mojo Jojo, will have to harm you, who has the secret that I, Mojo Jojo, want from you, a Powerpuff Girl!” Remember how Mojo Jojo rambled on and on for no reason? Seriously look up any Mojo Jojo rant…you’ll see how redundant and repetitive he is.
  • 48. They all started hanging out in the morning before school autonomously. Lyra initiated it with Robin…and then Phoebe joined in. They were talking about kissing…I’m sure Phoebe started that up. Phoebe:“Ocean is taking me on a date soon. I bet he’ll kiss me again…” Lyra: “I can’t wait to date. It sounds so romantic!” Robin:”More like romant-ICK! Bleh!” Hey, I randomly agree with Robin on this one.
  • 49. Later on after school for Phoebe… “Orlando, I’d love to help you with tonight’s history homework, but I simply can’t. I’ve got work in an hour and….well, I’m kind of starving.” “Oh. Okay. Well…that’s cool, I guess. So…you and that Ocean kid are just casual right?” “Orlando, we’re going steady.” “We are!?” “No…Ocean is—you know what? How about you go home?” Jocks. Are. So. Stupid.
  • 50. “Alright, well…uh…I’ll call you tonight or something?” “No, that won’t be necessary, Orlando. Um…I’ve got to do something tonight.” “Ohhhhh…so you and Ocean ARE serious, eh? EH?!” *suggestive laugh* “No! That’s not—” “Seeya, Phoebe!” Feebs, get ready for some serious rumors tomorrow. “I hate stupid people….”
  • 51. Ew…who are you? “I’m Robin’s friend!” You look oddly happy about that fact.
  • 52. “You’re really good at playing Mary Mack, Andre.” (his real name is like…Andrejejleejlrjskxk or something, and I can’t…I just cant keep typing that out. I dub thee Andre.) “Just something I learned on the playground. No big deal.” *smug* “You’re so cool…” “What?” “Uhm…I mean…I said, I wish we had a pool…it’s hot!” Robin, it’s almost winter…
  • 53. “Well, I gotta get going, Robin. It was fun hanging out with you!” “Okay.” “I’ll save you a seat on the bus tomorrow.” “O-okay.” “Uh…Robin?” *snaps out of it* “Huh? What?” “Er…nothing. Bye!” I’m feeling disturbed. Let’s cut to a random picture that has no relevance!
  • 54. Alright, back to the story… Iris: “Robin, sit in your chair correctly.” Robin: *grumbles* Joe: “So how was school, girls?” Lyra: “I picked flowers with Ms. Keen!” Iris: “That’s lovely, Lyra. Oh, Robin? Who was that boy you were with?” Robin: “Um…just some kid who followed me home. These sandwiches are good, by the way!” Hmm…nervousness and subject changing….I think Robin likes Andre Pons! (yep. That’s his last name.)
  • 55. Takin’ out the trash, takin’ out the trash………AT NIGHT. “Do you have nothing else better to do with your free time than to watch old SpongeBob reruns?” No, I don’t. But the fact that you knew that was from SpongeBob says something! AHA! “It says I have kids who watch cartoons nonstop.” Yeah and—oh…wait a minute….I feel schooled. D:
  • 56. “Jared! I got a good grade! I got a good grade!” AWWWWWW! Of course you did! Who could give a bad grade to such a cute little kid like yourself!? I’m going to give you cake and pink things and a fuzzy teddy bear named Mr. Snuggles and then you can get a puppy! “You said kitten yesterday…” You can have both! :D (I’m lying, we might just get the kitten.)
  • 57. Robin’s becoming a teenager… Everyone, lock your children and small pets up. Because she will eat them. Then regurgitate their bones and leave it on your doorstep. Phoebe: “Ew, Jared…that’s graphic.” Eh…sorry. I unwillingly say Happy Birthday Robin….yay.
  • 58. …. “I’m kinda cute, aren’t I?” I’m not allowed to answer that. “But you call Lyra cute all the time!” Because she’s a cute child…things change when you become a teen. “So you’re not going to call Lyra cute when she’s a teen, then?” Fine! You look…c—cute. There. Now stop being an idiot and go skill or something. “Teeehehe!” Ugh. That laugh. Robin rolled pleasure, just like Phoebe. Makes more sense with Robin, though. She wants to become a celebrity chef. I wouldn’t trust her near my food, but whatever…
  • 59. Those are some industrial looking boots… “Robin, where did you get that outfit?” “The mall…?” “Which store?” “Why, Daddy? Do you wanna dress like me or something?” “No. Just making conversation.” *continues to read while humming* Joe, she was being a brat…not…*sigh*…honestly, the parenting skills on that one.
  • 60. “So…who were you talking to last night on the phone?” *quickly* “Ocean. Uh, your move.” “Ocean Shahan. You know, he sounds like a decent kid, from what I’ve heard of him.” “Yeah, he’s…neat.” Haha…neat? That has to be code for something, right? Phoebe isn’t that nerdy…
  • 61. “Just stay away from those Picture taking booths, and hot tubs…and cars at night. And pretty much any double bed, stay away from that….” “Daddy, what are you getting at…?” “JUST WAIT, OKAY?!” “Um…Dad…Ocean’s a knowledge sim, I believe…that’s the farthest thing from his mind.” “Yeah? Well, your mother’s a knowledge sim, and I wouldn’t say she’s not a feisty—” “Okay, Daddy?! Stop. Ocean and I are not serious like that. We haven’t even made out—” “Alright! It’s your move…” …….Ayydubyakaydubyaayyarrdee
  • 62. (That’s Andre all grown up…sort of) “Robin, what’d you invite me over here for?” “I told you, I had something to ask you…I’ll be right back. You stay here.” “But why?” “I just have to make sure my little sister gets inside…I have to deliver a message, of sorts.” “Uh…fine?”
  • 63. Why is she sitting on the couch…that looks all suspicious for no reason. “Hey, Robin! Are you watching me until Daddy gets home?” “Uh, yeah. Hey, listen…I’ll give you five simoleons if you don’t tell Mom or Dad I’ve got a boy over, okay?” “A boy…of course not! That’s so romantic! Like Romeo and Juliet!” “Eh..not exactly.” How dare you make such a cute child do your dirty work! HOW DARE YOU!!
  • 64. “Man, little kids are so easy…” “Haha, in what way?” “Well, I’m not supposed to have boys over when my parents aren’t home…” “Oh…interesting. So…can I see your room?” Robin…pause before you play. Sarah Palin’s daughter taught me that on an MTV PSA commercial. Mhm. She did. :D
  • 65. “Oh, and what do you want to see my room for?” “Well…I don’t know…a little makin’ out, perhaps…?” Robin, abort the mission! I repeat, abort the mission! I don’t like the look in his eyes right now! “Oh, so you want to make out, huh?” Robin is going to corrupt Lyra. I can tell. She’s going to make Lyra bad and then this whole legacy will crumble. Iris is gonna die of a broken heart and Joe will go into aspiration failure…I need to sit down…oh wait..I am sitting…
  • 66. “I knew you liked me…I knew it the first time I talked to you.” “Huh?” “Admit it. You want to go out with me, don’t you?”
  • 67. “Go out with you? Yeah right, Robin. Now come on, and let’s get this make out session over with…” “Wait…you don’t….?” “Robin, don’t make me laugh…you didn’t seriously think I wanted you?” “Sorry, but I did.” Oh, no….Robin, I told you….
  • 68. “I seriously thought I could do this for 100 simoleons, but…you’re just….I’m sorry, you’re not attractive to me at all! I guess I’ll just have to tell the guys on the soccer team I couldn’t do it.” “They made a bet about whether or not…that’s—How could you even agree to something like that?!” “Because I knew it would be easy. I knew you liked me. Easy 100 simoleons right there…but….I just can’t lead you on. Then people will think we’re dating. That’s just too weird. I mean, what about my reputation? Sorry, but 100 simmies is not enough to risk my social life. ” Robin…please don’t make that face… 
  • 69. “I’ll see you at school, Robin.” *walks off* Robin: *mumbling* “You idiot….You idiot, stupid jerk. Such an…ass face!” (I thought Iris told her not to say that. It makes me laugh when she says that.)
  • 70. A few hours later… Uh…Robin? “What?” *wince* Um…are you okay? “I’m fine. Stop asking me stupid questions…” Well…I just thought that maybe you’d be upset— “I SAID I’M FINE!” Alright…
  • 71. “Oh, hey Robin! How’d your secret date go?” (Lyra, now’s not the time to be cute….) “You wanna know how my secret date went?” “Yeah!” “Fine. I’ll tell you. I killed him. With my bare hands. Then I cut up his organs and put them in the spaghetti in the fridge. Does that answer your question, you stupid, optimistic little brat?” “I-I…was just…j-just…aaasssskkiiiiinnnng!” *starts to cry* Robin, you idiot…
  • 72. When Phoebe got home from work… “Robin, why was Lyra in my room, crying?” “Because…I called her a stupid optimistic little brat…” “Why do you tease her all the time! Goodness, Robin. It wouldn’t kill you to be nice, you know.” “Okay. Here’s a thought. How about you figure out that some guy that you liked only wanted to make out with you because people were gonna pay him to do it.” “…Robin, did that happen with Andre?”
  • 73. “Yeah. So what? I don’t care.” “Robin, it’s alright to be—” “I said I don’t care, Phoebe. Jeeze. You were right, okay? It would have to be an apocalypse for a guy to wanna kiss me.” “Robin, I didn’t mean that. I was just—” “Teasing me? You know what? Eff this stupid legacy! If I have to fall in love with some stupid guy, then I don’t want the inheritance. Lyra or you can have it. Jared can just put me on the ballot as a joke. Freakin’ hate romance!” “Robin…you’re just mad. You’re gonna want it when we go to college…” Poor Robin…wait? Phoebe, you’re talking about the inheritance when you say “it”, right? Right? Phoebe?!
  • 74. (Saturday morning…) Joe: “….Doll face...mhmm….what day is it?” Iris: “It’s Saturday…we get to sleep in…” “Oh….” …………… Joe: “Wait…WE’RE GOING ON VACATION TODAY!” Iris: “Oh my—HOW DID WE FORGET!!?” And how did I not know that…
  • 75. “Vacation day, vacation day!” “Stop, Phoebe! That tickles!” “Hahaha!”
  • 76. “Yippee. Vacation day.” You could sound a bit more excited, you know…
  • 77. Lyra: “Robin, how can you not be excited to go to Twikii Island? Phoebe: “Because she’s a soulless monster?” Haha! Good one, Feebs! “No, it’s because it’s super early, and I just know everyone’s going to be over the top happy there.” Phoebe: “Happiness isn’t such a bad thing, Robin. And you never know, you might actually have a good time.” Yeah, if she tortures all the islanders.
  • 78. “All right, everyone! The shuttle is on it’s way. Make sure you have everything.” I’ve had Bon Voyage for a while now, and I still haven’t taken any of my sims on a vacation. Guess it took a legacy to make me want to do that. I didn’t even plan to do this…I just started playing and I was like…I’m bored. Let’s go on vacation. Wish I could do that in real life.
  • 79. Lyra: “I’m so excited!!” Robin: *mocking* “Ooh, I’m so excited, la lala!” Phoebe: “Stop acting so immature, Robin…”
  • 80. “I really wish Ocean could come...” Hah. Ocean going to the ocean. That’s funny. “Not really. It’s just a bad pun.” Thanks.
  • 81. “Daddy, make sure I get shotgun!” “Honey, I’m riding shotgun…” “But Daddy!” “It’s so I can make sure the driver gets us to the airport safely.” Whatever, Joe. You know you just want to ride in the front seat because it’s better.
  • 82. “Momma, wait for me!” “Darling, we’re not leaving you.” “But my suitcase is too heavy!” “Just take your time, Lyra.”
  • 83. “Oomph…I can’t—urg—open it!” Awww! It’s because she’s small. Robin: “You’re doing it wrong! It’s a sliding door, stupid!” Lyra: “Oh! Heehee!” Even her mistakes are cute! :D
  • 84. A few hours later… “Ugh, it’s so hot…” Why are you wearing a sweater, still? “Because it was cold on the—shutup, Jared. I don’t feel like talking to you.” Yikes.
  • 85. “Welcome to Twikii Island, sir. My name is Neil. How many rooms do you need to book?” “Oh just two. One with a double bed, and another with two separate beds. Also, could you add an extra bed to the large suite?” “Of course, sir. And how many nights will you be staying?” “Two nights.” “Very well. Your rooms should be ready within half an hour.” “Thanks!” “At your service, sir. If you need anything, do not hesitate to call.”
  • 86. “Mom, it’s so beautiful here!” “I know, baby. We just figured we’d get away from the Moon Islands for the weekend. You girls have been working so hard at school and skilling.” Translation: Joe and Iris wanted to get away from work and spend the weekend woohooing with each other while the girls had fun at the beach and swimming in the pool. Joe and Iris really don’t care how hard the girls work by this point, they just want them to hurry up and go to college. I may or may not have just guessed on whether or not that’s what Iris meant. Confusing sentence! Wooo!
  • 87. “Hey, neighbor! Hang loose!” “Huh?” “It’s the local gesture! I’ve been vacationing here since I was out of college. Just thought I’d get to know the newbies at the hotel!” “Um…okay?” “My name’s Goopy!” *gags* “No no, Kimbrell. Goopy Kimbrell.” Oh. Okay. Phew….almost threw up all over the keyboard again…
  • 88. “Mr. Kimbrell, stop scaring the vacationers.” “I’m just greeting them, Lauren.” Lauren is the maid. I like the French Maid outfits better….but that’s just me. 
  • 89. “Hey, Neil? Smile!” “Oh, okay, Miss Russo.” *smiles* “Great.” “May I ask why you took my photo?” “Ehh…You know. Just in case…” “Er…Just in case what, Miss Russo?” *Robin leaves* “Miss Russo?” Neil, it’s perfectly normal to be afraid.
  • 90. “Too hot for you, Joe?” “Heh…not hot enough…” I don’t want to know what he means by that. Ever.
  • 91. “You seem to be very tense in your shoulders, Miss.” “Yeah, I don’t really have that much time to relax.” “I see that you’re the oldest of your sisters, correct?” “Yeah..and Robin is the worst to look after. She’s always so stupid when it comes to decision making. Not to mention she has a horrible temper.” “Ah. I see. Well, I see to it that this massage completely relaxes you. Just forget all about those troubles of yours, Miss.” I feel like taking a nap….I wish I was getting a massage.
  • 92. “That’s it everybody! Do the hula!” Lyra took it upon herself to form a mass hula dancing circle. And everybody loved it because she’s so darn adorable! Old guy: “I haven’t gotten to dance like this in ages!”
  • 93. Robin: “Timla!” Phoebe: *breaks the surface* “Turn-ohh!” Robin: “Timlaaaa!” Phoebe: “Turno!” They’re playing….Marco Polo. Sims style.
  • 94. Hula Dancer: “That’s right girls! Shake what your momma gave you!” Robin: “Phoebe, what is she talking about?” “I dunno, just follow her moves!” Lyra: “She means your hips! Hula Dancer: “That’s right, little one! Shake those hips!”
  • 95. “Oh wow, this place is so cool!” “Why yes, sir, it is! Would you like to go on a tour?” “Never mind the tour! Can I take your picture?” “What for?” “I’ve never seen a hairless gorilla dressed as a tour guide and standing upright for so long! The guys at work aren’t going to believe this! And you can talk!” “….” “So how about that tour?” *sigh*
  • 96. How was the helicopter ride? “It was so beautiful! Except for Joe trying to look for more hairless gorillas…*sigh*” Anything else? “Ah, yeah! I found a map to some secret hut. Joe said we should take the girls and check it out.” What time is it? ADDDDDDVENTURE TIME!! Mysterious hut, mysterious hut!! Sorry, this is my first time playing Twikii Island…
  • 97. “Wow…Daddy, what is this place?” “I don’t know…It’s so big and…jungle-y.” “You think somebody lives there?”
  • 98. Most likely considering there’s a mailbox and a trashcan. Seriously, EA? A mailbox!
  • 99. Iris: “Robin, did you really have to come in your bathing suit? What if the Twikii Island’s king lives here? Robin: “Then this is a ramshackle palace. I’m sure some crazy old dude probably just lives here….or….a ghost!” Lyra: “A ghost?” Robin, stop trying to scare Lyra!
  • 100. “Don’t worry, Lyra! I’ll battle the ghost! Chaaaarrrggeee!!” Joe and Iris: “ROBIN! Get back here!” Robin: “I wanna be an airborne ranger, I wanna lead a life of dangerrrr!” That’s from the Breakfast Club.
  • 101. “Gaaahhh! Stupid microwave! Casting spells on me! I’ll cast a spell on you, stupid Microwave!” Haha, he’s so withdrawn from society that he believes the microwave casted a spell on him. This, my friends, is the Witch Doctor! Not technically a ghost…
  • 102. “I am sorry, kind visitors! I cannot entertain you when my house is in such a spell! I must retreat. All of these…’appliances’ have turned on me! I don’t believe anyone can help me…” “Well, Mr. Witch Doctor—” “Call me SIR!*” “Sir…uh…I’m pretty good in the mechanical skill. I could fix up your home for you. If you’d like?” “….A mere mortal, such as yourself! HAH! Don’t make me laugh.” *leaves* *That’s from Ferris Bueller’s day off :D
  • 103. “What did he cut the wire for…I’m pretty sure this man caused more damage trying to fix these things…” Uh…what is that puddle from? “Oh it’s from the…um…wait, the dishwasher doesn’t leak when it’s broken…” Oh, gross.
  • 104. Lyra, as adorable as you look right now, I’d stay out of the puddles around here.
  • 105. “Stupid mortal man. He thinks he can fix those magical items. He’s so naĂŻve. He’s what the villagers call ITAKUMASHI!” (I literally just made that up…)
  • 106. “Do we really have to stay here until Daddy fixes everything?” “Yes, Phoebe. Your Dad is doing a good deed for this…insane man.” “I guess…”
  • 107. “YUUSSSSS!!! I proved my manliness by repairing common household items!” Joe, you’re frightening me. “Lyra, go tell the Witch Doctor I succeeded!”
  • 108. “Mr. Witch Doctor!! Mr. Witch Doctor!!” Awww! She’s running and it’s cute!
  • 109. “What does little girl want?” “My daddy is finished repairing your house!” *snorts* “No mortal can repair those things!” “Well…I don’t know what a mortal is….but my Daddy fixed everything!” “All right, little girl. I’ll be there soon. Run along.”
  • 110. “So you have fixed everything! That is amazing! Surely you are magical!” “No, Sir. I am a mortal, like you said.” “Impressive.”
  • 111. “I was thinking of using this on the man that sold me these appliances, but I have no use for it now…” “Oh, thanks, Sir. What is it?” “Shhh! I cannot tell you! But be careful of it. Make sure it does not get into the wrong hands. For they will have power over anyone! It’d be very wise of you to never touch it yourself. The temptation to control others is very hard to dismiss when you hold this item.” Alright.
  • 112. So the Russo family left the Mysterious Hut and the Mysterious man. Lyra: “Robin, stop walking so fast! I don’t wanna be last!” Robin: “Stop being such a brat, Lyra. I was joking about the ghosts.”
  • 113. A few minutes later… “Momma, do you think the Witch Doctor will be okay on his own?” “Of course, Sweetie. He’s gotten by just fine it seems. Your dad helped him out really well.” “I still worry about him. What if he doesn’t get enough food?”
  • 114. “I am not sure spaghetti is supposed to taste like a burnt piece of firewood…” Yeah, he’s getting by just fine…
  • 115. Robin: “So, Daddy! Can I have that doll he gave you?” “As if he’d give it to you, Robin…Daddy’s most likely going to sell it, right?” Joe: “I might. Or just give it to whoever gets the inheritance.” Robin: “And now I suddenly want to win the legacy vote again!” You evil person…
  • 116. (Midnight…) Robin: “Five thousand. Tops.” Lyra: “That’s a lot…” Phoebe: “Shutup, Robin. There are way more stars in the sky than just five thousand.”
  • 117. “Phoebe, do you think aliens are lonely?” “Huh? I don’t know…why do you ask?” “Well…because they always want to come to our world. But they can’t. So they send their babies here.” “I never thought of it like that.”
  • 118. Robin: “No, they’re just trying to take over Simnation.” Phoebe: “I thought that was you.” “Ha. Ha.” Lyra: “Do you think they like bubble baths?” Robin: “Of course. Who doesn’t?” Phoebe: “True.” Based on an actual conversation I had while stargazing. O__o
  • 120. The next day! “So, Lyra, what do you want to do today?” “I wanna go to the beach!” Yeah, good idea Lyra!
  • 121. “Joe, are you coming with us?” “No, you and the girls have fun. I’m just going to catch up on some reading.” He’s reading a book about a guy who maxed his mechanical skill and his wife constantly complimented him on his manliness. Joe’s a strange guy.
  • 122. “Say cheese, Jared!” Not if I make you say cheese first! And now a vacation montage! Listen to that one Beach Boys song Do it Again if you want! (that was from Happy Feet :D )
  • 123.
  • 124. “Your abs are amazing!”
  • 125.
  • 126. “Phoebe! Come out here!”
  • 127.
  • 128. “Hey, beautiful, are you single?”
  • 129. “No, but we can be friends!” “Uh…I guess.” Phoebe doesn’t realize the affect she has on teenage boys. And she’s not a Romance sim…so it’s pretty amazing how many guys are attracted to her. It’s also pretty amazing how many I want to beat up because of it. That’s the end of the montage, by the way!
  • 130. Time passed and pretty soon it was time to go back to the Moon Islands where winter was slowly rolling in.
  • 131. Robin: “Seeya, Hairless Gorilla man!” Iris: “Robin, he’s not a gorilla!” He looks like one… Lyra: “Guys! Wait for me!”
  • 132. “That was pretty fun, wasn’t Robin?” “Yeah, sure.” “Admit it, you had a good time.” “Only because those fire dancers had smokin’ hot bodies.”
  • 133. “Robin, can you please not do that.” “Don’t worry, Mom! I’m a pro!” Not exactly…
  • 134. “OWWW!!” “Robin, are you okay?” “Yeah, just peachy! Except my buns are on fire!!” Okay. Here’s some more questioning. Sims know how to stop drop and roll (or in this case, rub their butts against the ground) when they catch fire doing the fire dance. But if they catch fire trying to be fancy with the Baked Alaska or cooking, they just dance around. Does that make sense? NO.
  • 135. It’s Lyra’s birthday, everyone! Why are you not clapping? START CLAPPING. The most adorable child is growing up! But unfortunately we will have to end right here for this chapter…because this one is pretty long. I made a choice to either focus on the girls at their teen years towards the end of this chapter, or go on the vacation. I chose the vacation, obviously…So the next chapter will be out like a day after this one. That will show how Lyra turned out and everything and the rest of the teen years. Hope this was entertaining to some extent!