Spiritual Steps to Happiness Part 1

Spiritual Steps to Happiness:
Group and Family Activities
Dr. Dawn-Elise Snipes
Host: Counselor Toolbox Podcast
AllCEUs Unlimited CEUs $59 | Addiction Counselor Certificate Training $149 | Specialty Certificates $89 1

Objectives
 Define spirituality
 Explore the concepts of connectedness, awe and
wonder and faith.
 Identify 7 days of activities for each.

What is Spirituality
 A sense of connectedness
 Humans were meant to connect
 A belief that there is something bigger than
ourselves that promotes a sense of awe and
wonder.

Connectedness
 A recognition of our impact on others and
everything and vice versa
 A recognition that we belong and are a vital part
of the universe
 Has been shown to be one of the strongest
protective factors against mental health and
substance abuse issues
 Connectedness to school, family and neighborhood
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Connectedness
 Why this logically makes sense that it could
improve happiness and reduce distress
 A recognition of what is impacting us and what we have
control over
 An awareness of our purpose and essentialness in the
universe
 When we have a positive impact, on others
It makes us feel good
It can earn us positive points and strengthen our supports
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Connectedness
 What the Bible Says
 1 Corinthians 12 We are all part of one body with many
members each serving a unique function.
 14 For the body does not consist of one member but of
many. 15 If the foot should say, “Because I am not a hand, I do
not belong to the body,” that would not make it any less a part
of the body.
 17 If the whole body were an eye, where would be the sense of
hearing? If the whole body were an ear, where would be the
sense of smell? 19 If all were a single member, where would the
body be?
 21 The eye cannot say to the hand, “I have no need of you,” nor
again the head to the feet, “I have no need of you.” 22 On the
contrary, the parts of the body that seem to be weaker are
indispensable.

7 Days of Connectedness
 Day 1: Universal Connectedness
 Which organ can you do without? Heart, lung, kidney, pancreas,
brain, skin, liver…
 How does each of these “non-essential” or weaker parts enrich
life? Non-dominant hand, nose, eyes
 How does the body cope when a part goes away or gets injured?
(accommodation but never the same)
 Why is a garbage collector as important as a teacher or dentist?
 What part of the body are you and why?
 Embrace that today and think about it in everything you do.
(Group people by parts)
 Skin, heart, brain, nervous system, mouth, hands, lungs, muscles,
ligaments/tendons

 Day 2: Self-Connectedness
 Pre-session homework: Mindfulness of how you feel
emotionally, mentally, physically (1-word journal)
 Awareness of how the way you feel emotionally, mentally
and physically impacts your ability to be kind to yourself and
others and be in a positive frame of mind.
 Flip chart topics (3 rows)
 Happy/Content
 Overwhelmed/Exhausted
 Angry/Disempowered
 Depressed/Hopeless
 Sick/In pain
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 Day 3: Self-Connectedness
 Pre-Session Homework: Journal. Pay attention to the
“gallery” in your head.
What do you tell yourself?
 Shoulds
 Positive or negative statements
 Affirmations
Who planted these seeds in your psyche?
What do you believe
 Share insights in group and discuss how to connect to
yourself with compassion. What would a nurturing
parent say?

 Day 4: Involvement
 Synergize by seeking first to understand then to be understood
and creating win/win situations. (Group discussion)
 What do these things mean to you?
 Pick one person that you often conflict with and discuss how you
could synergize.
 Pick one person you are similar to and how you could synergize
 Identify what is important to you and look for ways to be
involved. (Brainstorming session)
 Involve the whole group/family and reinforce the importance
of every voice
 Mindfulness check-ins in group or at meal time (How are you
today? What do you need from me? You have impacted me by…)
 Decisions
10

 Day 5: Ponder your unique strengths and qualities
that make you ---you.
 Each member of the group/family identifies a unique
quality of each other member…put it on a note card
You have improved my world/this group by… or You have
taught me….
 Make a profile wall (old fashioned wiki) for each person
in the group/family using cork boards
Add to it regularly

 Day 6: Ponder your impact on others
 Make a dedicated effort to practice random acts of
kindness (most important people, co-workers, random
strangers) Flip chart or small group
Acts of service
Words of appreciation
Quality time
Gifts (even little notes or cookies)
Physical touch
 Be aware all day of how your words, nonverbals and
actions impact other people. (Evening journal)

 Day 7: Ponder other’s impact on you
 Be aware all day of how other people’s words and actions
and your environment impact you. (Journal)
 What things have a negative impact on you? Make a plan to
deal with unpleasant impacts.
 Failure to do what is expected
 Rude drivers
 Grumpy people
 People with opposite temperaments
 Disorganization
 Lots of noise or sudden noises
 What things have a positive impact on you. Make a plan to
enhance those in your life. (WWSD)
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Loving kindness
meditation

Questions

Awe and Wonder
 What is it
 A sense of wonder is characterized by full engagement,
flow, being present in the moment, and a high “wow”
factor. - Rachel Carson
Awareness of the beauty around you
Sense of amazement
Recognition of personal power
What does it mean to you?

Awe and Wonder
 Why this logically makes sense that it could
improve happiness and reduce distress
 It get’s us outside of ourselves
 It helps us see that things are not as simple as they
first appear
 It helps us realize that very little is impossible
 It helps us see that something small can produce
something big
 It helps us see that some things are just out of our
control and/or understanding.

Awe and Wonder
 What the Bible Says
 Genesis 1 The Creation Story
 Job 38 God tells Job he has knowledge and powers that
he will never understand.
“Where were you when I laid the earth’s foundation?
Tell me, if you understand.
5 Who marked off its dimensions? Surely you know!
Who stretched a measuring line across it?
6 On what were its footings set,
or who laid its cornerstone—
 1 Samuel 17 David and Goliath
 Judges 7 Gideon and the Army of 300

7 Days of Awe and Wonder
 Day 1: Maple seed
 Ponder how such a small seed can produce such a
majestic tree with so many diverse parts
 Think about all the functions that a maple tree
provides
Food (seeds, syrup)
Shade
Homes for creatures
Lumber for homes or heating
Soil renewal
Decoration/happiness

 Day 2: Chicken or the Egg Dilemma
 Which comes first….
 Before I…they have to….
 Day 3: An Amazing “Oh! My! Gosh!” Moment
 Find amazement in everyday by being mindful –present and fully
engaged - and exploring each moment as if it were your first
experience … (tastes, smells, sights, experiences) (Beach ball)
 Haley’s cooking
 Ralph’s fur
 The purr of my cat
 Sylvia’s birth
 Bornstellar defending my honor
 Make a list of awe and wonder adjectives and use them daily.
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Fabulous
Incredible
Amazing
Marvelous
Tremendous
Spectacular
Unbelievable

 Day 4: Multiple Perspectives--- Being curious instead of
critical
 I wonder what that person is seeing/thinking
 Charades, taboo…
 What does existence mean: I think therefore I am -Descartes
 Day 5: Remembering Wonderous Moments
 It was amazing when… (how did you feel, what did you think…)
 Pregnancy/childbirth
 When I (accomplished something I didn’t think I could)
 When someone supported me and I didn’t think they would

 Day 6: Immersion in Awe and Wonder
 Slow down and immerse yourself in the awe and wonder
around you… (Hot potato)
 The beauty of a singer’s voice
 The talent of your child
 The intelligence of someone
 The compassion demonstrated by
 The accomplishments of…
 Day 7: The eyes of a child
 Follow things forward and backward. (Pick a card: Birds fly,
sky blue, mountains come from, squirrels act squirrely…)

Questions

Faith
 What is it
 Confidence, not based on actual evidence or proof, that things
will work out as they need to.
 Why this logically makes sense that it could improve
happiness and reduce distress
 Helps us give up trying to control people and situations that are
out of our control
 Empowers us and motivates us to do our part
 I have faith that if I…then…
 Helps us recognize that even when things don’t go our way, we
will be able to cope
 I have faith that I can get through this
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Faith
 What the bible says
 Matthew 6:25 Do not worry
25 “…Do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink;
or about your body, what you will wear…26 Look at the birds
of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns,
and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much
more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying
add a single hour to your life?
 Matthew 19:26 With God all things are possible

Faith
 What the bible says
 Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in God with all your heart. In all your
ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your
paths.
 Proverbs 3:9-10 “Honor God with the firstfruits of all your
crops; then your barns will be filled to overflowing, and
your vats will brim over with new wine.”
 Psalm 23:4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the
shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me;
thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

7 Days of Faith
 Day 1: Faith in the Process
 Sentence completion
 I have faith that if I (do my
part)…then…
 I have faith that I can handle
whatever life throws at me because…
 Make a list of times when you faced
hardship but things either worked
out they way you wanted, or you
were able to handle the adversity
and how…
 False accusation
 Premature infant
 Pre-med
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Bon Jovi Living on a Prayer
Jimmy Buffett Love and
Luck
Jimmy Eat World The middle

7 Days of Faith
 Day 2: Faith in Others
 Make a list of the people who have been there for you
 Make a list of people who respect your thoughts, feelings and
boundaries (even if they don’t agree).
 Make a playlist
 Make a scrapbook
 People do the best they can with the tools they have at any
given time.
 Discuss the “tools” people can have: Mindfulness skills,
interpersonal skills, compassion, patience, distress tolerance
skills, problem solving skills, etc. and how they can help people
be who they want to be and increase happiness
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• Wind Beneath My Wings
(Bette Midler)
• Ill be there for you (Bon
Jovi)
• That’s What Friends are
For (Dionne Warwick)
• I’ve Got Your Six (FFDP)
• Feel Invincible (Skillet)
• Indestructible
(Disturbed)
• Garth Brooks Friends in
Low Places

7 Days of Faith
 People do the best they can with the tools they have at
any given time.
Explore why people might not have tools with them all the
time. (Doctor on a plane, vulnerabilities)
Explore how this applies when: (Group discussion)
 People have disappointed you
 You have disappointed yourself
 You have disappointed others
What can you learn from these experiences?
How can this enhance compassion?
28

7 Days of Faith
 Day 5: Faith in Self (I am perfect in the moment)
 Faith mantra poster
I have faith that I will do the right thing
I have faith in my gut
I have faith that I am a good person
I have faith that I can…
I have faith that I can learn and grow from every
experience (Progress not perfection)
 To be or not to be, that is the question (choice)
 Play list
29
• Halestorm Dear Daughter
• Christina Aguilera
Beautiful
• Colbie Caillat – Try
• Demi Lovato – Confident
• Alessia Cara-Scars to Your
Beautiful
• Jennifer Hudson – You
Will
• Whitney Houston
Greatest Love of All
• Lorrie Morgan – My Own
Strength

7 Days of Faith
 Day 6: Awareness of the Limits of Control
 Have each person identify 1 challenging situation, what they can
control and the associated dialectics to control their reaction to the
situation (Flip charts or small groups or one topic each night)
 I want to be in a relationship with…
 I want to be accepted by X group (clique, club…)
 I want X job
 I want to be healthy and live forever
 I want my kids to be happy
 I have to be valedictorian
 I want to be happy
 I want to go hiking today
 Create a worksheet
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7 Days of Faith
 Day 6: Awareness of the Limits of Control
 Worksheet
I want…
What parts are within my control?
What parts are not within my control?
What would be a positive compromise?
What dialectics can I use (make lemonade)?
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7 Days of Faith
 Day 7: What things happen without fail (usually)This can
help when things seem totally out of control (Hot potato)
 What goes up must come down
 People will die
 The sun will rise (and set)
 Summer comes after Spring
 I will wake up
 I will have good days and bad days
 I will have comfortable days and pain sometimes
 My dog loves me
 I will have disagreements with my friends but we will work through
them
 What else…
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Summary
 Connectedness, awe and wonder and faith can all
help people live a happier life
 Even those who do not believe in a higher power
“being” can often embrace the higher order of Good
Orderly Direction
 Be aware of trauma triggers when doing this work
 Connectedness with an abuser
 Faith in a higher power to protect
 Faith in others (who abandoned)
 Etc…
 Provide the topics ahead of time to your group
members so they can find meaningful quotes in their
scripture or philosophical readings
33

Spiritual Steps to Happiness Part 1

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