The document contains several poems and writings by Magan Edinger on various topics such as addiction, anxieties, appreciation, awakening, broken promises, dancing in the twilight, and demise. The poems explore themes of love, loss, mental health struggles, and finding meaning in life.

1. MAGAN EDINGER'S POETRY & WRITINGS
18560 ROYALTON RD #201
STRONGSVILLE, OH 44136
maganedinger@gmail.com
440-409-7633
Addiction
Addiction consumes every thought
of every waking second
of every day
making you distraught
having to reckon
as your soul slowly decays
wasting all of your energy and time
wondering if you will dine
on the very thing that consumes you
a constant internal battle of the soul
you can no longer resist, so you succumb
causing you to commit another crime
as you further decline
the more poison you accrue
as you are engulfed by the black hole
your life has become
You are now totally numb
and your heart is cold
you feel like complete scum
and your soul has been sold
________________________________________________________________________________________
Afraid
I have enough love to end all evil
Yet I am afraid of the upheaval
Caused by the lies and hand of slight
Afraid they will not be my knight
I do not want to put my heart on the line
Only to have our love decline
Spiraling into the blackest depths of hell
Yet I do not realize because I am under your spell
Is there any hope of the fairy tale
Where I will actually where my veil
Will it be at my wedding
Or at a funeral beheading
_________________________________________________________________________________________
1

2. Anniversaries
Love is something very special
shared between two people
that is not easily found.
You two were lucky enough
to find it & to be bound by it.
Anniversaries are reminders of how
lucky you are & to let others know
they can be just as lucky.
Thank you for showing me that
love & romance are still alive.
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Anxieties-Loneliness -Inside My Head
Anxieties, depression, insecurities, isolation,
loneliness, low self worth, shyness, OCD.
Why do I proceed with hesitation?
Makes me feel like I am jailed in my own head.
I say no thanks to any and all of the meds.
Meds with a billion side effects, including suicide,
wanting to be dead, someone please euthanize.
Make sure you do everything times three
or panic might be widespread.
It kills me to know that those I love
would be better without, free of
me holding them back
to live their lives free and happy
not surrounded by darkness of black
not to be unhappy.
Others take for granted the simple things,
things that would make me feel alive!
Doing things in front of people like
dancing, sports, games, singing
would give me wings!
Being goofy, driving, just being me
would make me thrive!
Being the center of attention,
gives me a panic attack,
makes me sweat and shake,
feeling as if I were in a wolf pack.
I am much happier being in the shadows
much less apprehension,
much less ache!
Always living in my head.
I don't care what people think,
yet a prisoner of my own thoughts.
2

3. How is this possible? How is this best?
I am not afraid to speak my mind
yet I am afraid to exist?
I guess I have made my own bed
and it is now time to rest,
to quiet my head.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Appreciation
Have ac on a hot day
and keeping heat stroke at bay
Being able to take a hot shower on a cold morning
Instead of heading a freezing warning
Smelling a fire of leaves and wood
And not a fire from those that feel misunderstood
From bombs and chemicals and not of wood
Having a tub of hot water
to warm yourself when cold
not having to worry about slaughter
from someone chasing fool’s gold
Having a job, whether we love it or hate it
We still have a check to submit
Thus can afford a roof over our heads
And keep ourselves in threads
Having someone in our life that loves us
Helping us address all of our stress
And having someone we can love
Is the most important of all of the above.
Having the love and trust
of anyone that has been hurt
whether animal or human
helps get them out of this life unjust
Helps them to revert
And stay away from the subhuman
And return to a prior state of trust
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Awakening
You have awakened in me
a side of me that has laid dormant for way to long
I feel a pulse of energy, a sense of excitement
pulsing through every inch of my being
through my very soul
A stranger in cyberspace
yet I can not get you off of my mind
as if I was looking straight into your soul
and you into mine
3

4. What a beautiful magical person you must be
for me to feel so connected, so close
to someone I have only talked to online
Your power overwhelms me
and has breathed new life into me
I feel my power alive again, my soul set on fire
I can fell your presence as if you were
sitting right next to me, one with me
my dreams and desires will be filled with you
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Broken Promises Broken Heart
I promised myself I would keep the door to my heart closed. I promised myself I would not fall in love again
only to have it tear me apart. I broke those promises, for they meant nothing the moment my empty eyes were
filled with the vision of you. All logic went out the window & my heart took control. The promises had been
broken. You had that lost puppy dog look, the one that says, I'm lost, scared & confused...please take care of
me. Well I wanted to be that person. I still do. You were vulnerable, yet strong, cute yet sexy, goofy yet
intelligent. To look into your beautiful eyes, or see you smile, or hear you laugh, made my heart melt & filled
me with happiness. Sometimes when we held one another after making love, I didn't want to let go. I still
don't want to let go. Now you are gone & I sit alone & think about you & the things I love about you & the
things that make me smile. Then I smile for a brief moment, then realize, you are gone.... my baby is gone.
Then I shed a tear. Once again, broken promises, broken heart.
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Bryan Dear
Bryan dear
you are so near
yet so far away.
When I think of you
my thoughts go astray.
For I love you
each and every day
but something always gets in our way
it's either what we do
or maybe what we say.
I'd give you my heart
but for I'm afraid we'd part
and I can't let that be.
Oh can't you see
just like destiny
we were meant to be.
You probably don't feel the same
to you it's probably all a game.
4

5. If you dare
tell me you don't care
if you care
please share
for I must know!
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Circles
Why do we keep going in circles? Repeat performances, repeating the same mistakes over & over.
Falling again & again for the same type of person or the same circumstance, the same negative experience.
We say that we learn from our mistakes, yet we choose to repeat them, falling into the same trap.
Why? Why are we destined to be unhappy, or do we have to repeat the same hurts over & over again till
they've beaten us down to the point we have no more fight, or do we just choose to be miserable, not to lift
ourselves above the circumstance. Do we not deserve better? Do we not believe that we deserve better?
Do we get so conditioned to being mistreated & unhappy that that is what we are drawn to & what we expect or
what we are comfortable with?
Stop! Stop this insanity! Stop repeating the same pattern. Break that mold & decide right now you deserve
better! And yes you do deserve better! Go for it & don't settle for anything less!
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Common Bonds
Most of us want the same thing. We want to be heard, we want to make a positive difference, we want to be
loved, we want to love. We don't want to feel like our life was wasted. We want to know something we did
made a difference for the better for someone. Then why is it so hard? Why do so many of us feel alone? Why
do we not all connect? Not even a small amount of us connect. Why do so many of us feel isolated because we
are gay, black, Muslim or just your everyday American girl next door? A lot of us feel like strangers in our own
skin, our own families or or own circle of friends. It is like we do not belong in our own neighborhoods, families
or workplace. For those of you who feel the same I am here as are many others, sometimes you just have to
dig threw layer after layer to find them. I am still searching.
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Crazy
Thoughts race through my mind
a million at a time
I can not rest
because I can not quiet my mind
These thought of mine are becoming a pest
I am crazy, I am starting to find
I play out scenes in my head
that have never come about
some things I have read
others things I shout
5

6. Please quiet my soul
give me some peace
To make these thoughts roll
out of my head
I will have to cease
cease to exist
I will have to be dead
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Dancing in the Twilight
As I watch from afar
I see you dancing in the twilight
Under the silvery moonlight
Your pale skin glistening so white
As if diamonds were dancing upon your skin
As I wish upon a star
In the darkness of night
I dream of your immortal bite
My forever knight
Touching you would be a heavenly sin
My body aches as I wonder who you are
My man of flight
I wish we could become one tonight
How you incite
Flames eternal
From your loving nocturnal
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Demise
The things you do
Tear me apart inside
Whether you see it through
Or even if you try
You take me on an emotional ride
You even make me cry
I do not understand
Why you hurt me
I just want to be free
Free of this pain
Break free from this chain
There is no more I can withstand
Yet you plant the seeds inside
That make me slowly die
Making me disband
And making my heart bleed
6

7. Yet you continue to feed
What will soon be my demise
And you will soon watch
As my soul finally dies.
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Distraction
To look into your eyes
and know they are free from lies
and to see your smile
makes me daydream for awhile
and to hear your laughter
brings me happiness beyond belief
to know we will be together in the hereafter
brings me relief
I feel as though I have known you forever
and I feel like we have been together
in another time and another place
and in yet another embrace
yet the excitement still burns bright
You and I just feels right
You are always on my mind
as if our fates are aligned
whether you are sitting right next to me
or miles away
I think you will agree
we will not go astray
When I see a text from you
my heart skips a beat
and I know we are meant to be two
and I feel complete
Your lips are like soft petals of rose
and to kiss them my heart knows
That you and I were meant to be
and our souls have entered a decree
To hold your hand
makes me understand
exactly what I have felt
and makes my heart melt
I know our paths were meant to cross
and our souls to intertwine
for lifetimes and miles across
we have traveled for our hearts to align
You have captured my heart
and my friendship is true
we are not meant to part
and I do love you
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Do We Have a Voice
Republican or Democrat?
Which one do you choose?
For whom do you agree with their views?
It's all an illusion that we come to our own conclusion
to make us feel as if we have a choice and a voice.
When in reality it's all a formality.
They are all puppets with Illuminati pulling their strings
being controlled by a higher force
world domination by the largest corporation
setting forth the world's course!
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Drama Free
If you are coming into my life
to cause strife
for the sole purpose of
acting with anything but love
7

8. Playing a game
what a shame
Creating drama
don’t forget about karma
Lying to me
You’ll get yours times three
Now hear me shout
Stay the fuck out!
___________________________________________________________________________________________________
Empty
I drink to forget the pain.
I drink to stop the questions.
I drink to fill the emptiness.
I do not understand
why you do not touch me
as if I was a disease
it makes me feel small and dirty
I do not understand why
others make me feel better
about myself then you
I am starved for attention
as if I was a lost puppy
craving human touch
I get angry because I am hurt
and I do not understand
I drink more and just hurt myself more
I put my trust where it does not belong
I lay where I should not lay
Now I sit next to a stranger on the couch
a stranger I have lived with for 5 years
who I know no better now then I did 5 years ago
I am exhausted
I am a shell of myself
I am hurt
I am confused
I am angry
I am lonely
I am empty
__________________________________________________________________________________________
End of Days
How loud does Mother Earth have to scream
falling on deaf ears
an endless cycle it seems
before no one is left here
and civilizations have disappeared
8

9. We are killing one another
we are killing our earth mother
we do not heed the warning signs
as the world around us declines
even though they are apparent to all
we do not try to stop what we are about to befall
natural resources being depleted
at such a fast pace-mother earth is being cheated
poisoning our earth, air and water
all the quicker leading ourselves to slaughter
With each advancement our earth suffers
mass animal deaths all over the world
TV broadcast fueling lies
what will it take for us to wake up
and realize we are killing her
along with our animal friends and our food supply
Natural disasters more prevalent then in the past
strength and intensity pushed to the max
the threat lingers of a nuclear blast
yet we continue down our same tracks
Financial ruin-economy bust
and people wonder why all the fuss
the world is submerged in pollution
instead of working together to come to a solution
politicians blaming one another
this is the coming of Big Bother.
We are all so busy and wrapped in our own lives
will only the strong survive?
We live by chat, email, social networks and text
yet we wonder why we sit perplexed
as to if it is really the end of days
and if it is caused by our selfish ways
How loud does Mother Earth have to scream
falling on deaf ears
an endless cycle it seems
before no one is left here
and civilizations have disappeared
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Eyes of Blind
I remove all of the clutter
and blow off the dust
and start to crawl out of the gutter
of pure mental disgust
and realize I must again begin to trust
9

10. I look deep inside
and see emotions and thoughts abound
I see feelings I have denied
and begin to wonder if I am unsound
No longer do I wish to hide
for I can not continue to drowned
Seeing with eyes of clarity for the first time
Not with my old eyes of blind
Beginning my long climb
Out of the confines of my mind
As I start my redesign
Like a butterfly emerging from a cocoon
My soul starts to shine
As my mind begins to attune
My wings are dry and ready for flight
So I now begin my journey
Where there is no end to the possibilities
Anywhere in site
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Facade
I see through your playful smile
into the depths of your heart
a heart that beats blacker then the depths of hell
a heart that beats solely for your selfish pleasures
How could I of been so blind
to think you were a caring person
when everything you do,
is in some way,
a benefit to you
Your fiery words and hurtful actions,
have burned holes of hatred and mistrust in my heart
holes that may one day heal, but forever will be left the scars
Scars to remind me not to be so trusting and to proceed with caution into my next relationship.
To imagine I loved someone
so mean, so heartless, so evil
makes me not want to trust my own feelings
You can only fool people with your fake facade for so long
Slowly the evil begins to creep through rearing its ugly head
Only then will people see the real you
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Fairytale Romance
We grow up reading the fairy tales of true love
And listening to all of the love songs about undying devotion
Dreaming of the day we will meet our one and only
Our true love, our soul mate
10

11. Having this perfect picture in our mind
that is near impossible to find.
I ask myself has this all been a lie
Is it to good to be true
Or do I just have bad judgment
When it comes to who I fall in love with
Why do I fall for people who are selfish
People who take things for granted
People who don’t appreciate the little things
I know there are many people out there
In the same quest as I
Yet I feel alone in my search
With each passing failed relationship
The wearier I grow in my search
Yet I still have hope
Knowing there is someone out there
Who I was destined for and they for me
I await my true love
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Family of Fur
They stand by us through it all
It doesn’t matter if we are short or tall
It doesn’t matter if we are big or small
They love us with all of their heart
and hope we are never apart
They have their own unique personality
They love us no matter what our nationality
They give us rubs and licks
and no it’s not just for kicks
They lay on our lap and purr
And cover us in fur
They admire us and respect us too
And if you piss them off enough
They have been known to shit in our shoe
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Fear
Why do a lot of us live our lives in fear?
What is it we fear?
Why limit ourselves by this fear?
11

12. We are all human doing the best that we can at that moment.
Do we fear that we are not good enough?
Based on whose standards?
Why give them the power to hold that fear over us?
Fear that eats at our insides, at our very soul.
Do we fear that we will not be loved,
that we are not worthy of love?
Do not let anyone put their standards on you.
Be true to yourself and those you love.
Live your life for yourself and without fear.
Our lives are too short to give anyone power over us.
Live life to its fullest.
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Forever Night
For how ever long the sun shines bright,
to me it will always be forever night.
Forever night in my heart you see,
that is all it will forever be.
The fire that once burned in my heart
disappeared when it was torn apart.
For I gave that fire in my heart,
to one I thought that would never part.
For I gave that fire to the one I thought loved me,
& off he ran so we would never be.
Others have come & tried to set my heart aflame,
but this will never be,
for he is to blame,
I'm sorry to say
that my fire went away.
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Friendship
Keep your heart open & true,
and free from lies.
And remember as long as you need me,
and I need you,
our friendship will never die!
_________________________________________________________________________________________
12

13. Happy Birthday Grandma
Dear Grandma,
Even though you left our presence physically, you're still very much alive in our hearts. There
isn't a day that goes by that your kind ways aren't remembered, your smile isn't seen, your
beauty isn't shared, or your laughter isn't heard, but most of all not a day goes by when we
don't think about how much we were loved by you & how much we all loved you. That's why on
this very special day, we would like to wish a very loved soul...Happy Birthday! We'll always love
you grandma & you'll always be a part of us! Until we meet again, I love you!
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Heartless & Soulless
Lying eyes and deceitful smiles
False friends and falsehoods
Everyone out for themselves
Dogs looking for their next conquest or high
They talk about you with razor sharp words
Each word another dagger in your back
Wolves in sheep’s clothing
Their mouths move and the lies come out
Lying eyes and deceitful smiles
The Heartless & Soulless
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Hearts Dream
I know we have only known one another for a short while,
but tell that to a heart with no concept of time.
To look into your eyes brings a warmth to my heart,
and a smile to my face,
and I know there is no other place,
that I'd rather be,
then sitting next to you,
and having you next to me.
To hold you in my arms is pure delight,
and to kiss you makes my soul ignite.
For me to be able to take care of you,
would be a dream come true,
to be forever one with you.
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Intuition
Do I listen to my intuition
and stay clear
or do I give him a chance
and continue this dance
Red flags all around
add to my ammunition
And fear
Lies abound
13

14. No pictures of him to be found
Except one with a helmet that masks his true identity
Is he hiding some obscenity?
Why so secretive?
Does he have something to hide
Possibly a bride?
His reasoning is thus
he says people get fired
For having a profile on a social website
Should I even bother to discuss
This leaves me uninspired
Is it worth the fight?
In the heat of the moment he gets up and flees
So fast I could feel the breeze
He says with urgency
its an emergency
to the doctor I must go
I think to myself he is someone’s beau
His Christmas card returned
No known address
Cause for concern
Or a little distress
Think I have been burned?
Things just do not add up
I live my life in the open
No secrets to be found
I will not be bound
By someone who can not be true to me
So the time for goodbye has come to be
___________________________________________________________________________________________________
Journey of Souls
To look into your eyes
is like looking into the depths
of the greenest of oceans
on the sunniest of days
copper reflections of the sun
gleaming back to the skies
Looking past the beauty of your eyes
Into the depths of your soul
I see someone gentle and pure,
I see someone who has been
deceived and is afraid to trust
I see someone strong and wanting to be free
I see someone who wants to trust
I see someone who needs to trust
I see someone who wants to be loved
14

15. I see someone who needs to be loved
I see someone who has a world of love to give
It takes time to heal all wounds
and in that right moment and in your own time
you will get the love you so deserve
Looking into your eyes, I see the reflection of
my own hurt soul staring back at me
and I somehow now know
that I am not alone In my journey
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Kiss of Death
Every night I lie in bed dreaming of the moment I will meet my Prince of Darkness & receive his kiss of death. A
moment I have dreamed of all my life. A moment that I willingly await for & invite all too often. My naked body
waits for his embrace & my soul for his kiss. For when I receive his kiss, my soul will forever be his & into
eternal darkness we will forever be, my Prince & me. So my prince I ask of thee one last time, please give me
thy kiss of death & make love to me till we have become one & melted together into the darkness I so lustfully
desire. I await you my Prince!
___________________________________________________________________________________________________
Labels
Why do we feel the need to place labels on others
Was it something instilled by our mothers
To judge and disrespect
Others we do not deem perfect
Perfect is in the eye of the beholder
Yet you give another the cold shoulder
Why do you think you are all high and mighty
As if you were Aphrodite
We label what we do not understand
Instead of giving a helping hand
We judge those different from us
And picture them on the short bus
It is sad that you never look beyond
In the possibility of forming a bond
You think with a small mind
And continue to live your life blind
Missing out on opportunities
To explore different communities
And a chance to enrich your life
But yet you still place them under the surgeon’s knife
And dissect them piece by piece
Will this insanity ever cease?
__________________________________________________________________________________________
15

16. Liberties
Our liberties are being stripped away
One by one in the name of increased security
How much more must we pay
For their impurities
With every breath they take
They suck the life right out of us
For we are no longer free
When we choose to disagree
Or when we make a fuss
Soldiers fight for what they believe
To only later find out, they have been deceived
Deceived by the very individuals who put them in harms way
And lead them astray
They sugar coat the truth
And corrupt the minds of our youth
But when the coating comes off
Their lies are a bitter pill to swallow
We are no longer going to follow
I ask fellow Americans to stand up and fight
for their privacy and civil rights
before America is no more the land of the free
and all that is left is the governmental clones of you and me
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Lost
I am lost,
once again you see,
no idea who is the real me.
I wonder where I belong,
if there is such a place,
where I can show my face.
Sometimes I feel there is no place for me,
whether I am here or there,
it's just not to be.
Just as the stars appear at night,
and are gone by day.
One minute things seem so right,
the next its all gone away.
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Love
Love...is it worth the pain I may feel, the lies I may live, or the disappointments I may encounter?
Should I open my heart & possibly experience a world of love yet making myself vulnerable to a world of
cruelty?
16

17. Is it worth it to travel mile after mile, through storm after storm, just to find your pot of gold at the end of the
rainbow? What if your pot of gold isn't there? What if you travel mile after mile & never find it?
I guess what I should be asking myself is... Do I want to experience love? If I do, then I have to take these
risks.
Risks that may open the door to a world I've never known before. A world so beautiful no one has ever
imagined it before, or risks that may close the door to my heart forever.
Life is about taking risks, so take these risks because life is no fun without love.
If you try & try again, you'll find your pot of gold! Best of luck in your search.
___________________________________________________________________________________________________
Love Almost Lost
Love almost lost once before
to be lost never more.
My soul mate once again in sight
and I am filled with fright
I hurt you in the past
which was never my intent
my mistakes were vast
for this, to thee, I repent
I will never take that chance again
the chance of losing zen
my soul mate, my freak
the man who makes me complete
I love you with every part of me,
all of my soul, body & mind
This is my decree,
for our hearts to be intertwined
for the rest of time
There has been a huge hole in my heart
for way too long
but no more will we be apart
for I now know where I belong
With my soul mate, my freak
the man who makes me complete
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Man of My Dreams
It is as if you walked out of a dream
coming into my life to redeem
a heart that had given up and filled with despair
and we started a once in a lifetime affair
17

18. Sent from the heavens above
a man worthy of all of my love
Eyes of an angel and smile of a devil
We connect on a spiritual level
You fulfill my darkest desires
and set my soul aflame with fires
and fill my heart with love and light
I have never seen a more beautiful sight
Then to look deep into your eyes
and know our love defies
I love you baby with all of my heart
and no one can tear that apart.
You are my fantasies come to life
I know that one day we will be husband and wife
___________________________________________________________________________________________________
Nocturnalchilde
I am a childe of the night,
living in the shadows,
living a lonely existence,
that no one understands.
For when you are a childe of the night,
you belong soley to the night,
and no one or nothing,
will ever be able to share you again.
So seductive and mysterious was the night,
that I gave of myself freely,
and now all that I know,
is the cold, cruel, empty night,
that I must live with for all eternity.
I am a childe of the night,
living in the shadows,
living a lonely existence,
that no one understand
_________________________________________________________________________________________
No Escape
The voices of children, the cries of babies,
the explosions, the farewell scream of a good friend,
and the blood curdling cry of a woman being raped...no escape.
Bullets flying, explosions all around,
Shots fired, say goodbye to the enemy.
Till your fellow brother lay dead on the ground,
do you realize that it was an illusion.
18

19. What began as a love for the country, a war of pride,
ended in a never ending emotional battle,
filled with tears that rip you apart inside.
A war that can never be won.
What began as a war of duty and pride,
ended in a war made of lies.
Being in the wrong place at the wrong time,
thousands crucified.
__________________________________________________________________________________________________
Own Worse Enemy
Negative thoughts constantly attacking my barrier
trying to tear it down
like sperm trying to penetrate an egg
these negative thoughts of myself
try to penetrate my self esteem
I am my own worse enemy
As much as I try to turn my
negative thoughts around
and tell myself I to stop
they keep coming back
I am my own worse enemy
I reaffirm that I am a beautiful, intelligent and loving person
I ask myself where these thoughts are coming from
Are these thoughts that I really think about myself
or are they thoughts others have pounded into my head
There are things I would like to improve
so instead of using all of my energies
feeding these negative thoughts
and bringing myself down ab being my
own worse enemy
I have decided to use that energy
to improve myself and to help others
and to become my own best friend
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Pain
I can see your pain
It makes you feel as if you may go insane
It shoots straight to the very heart of you
It keeps memories alive of all you have been through
And makes you question who is the real you
You have been through a lot this past year
Almost more then you can bare
I can see it in your eyes
As part of you dies
19

20. You blame yourself for things out of your control
The pain is etched in your soul
Your demons battle inside
Ripping you apart, never to subside
Restless is the tiger inside you
I hope my wish for you comes true
That you will finally be at peace
And all of this chaos will cease
Till then I will take your wounded soul
And place it in my heart
and protect you till you once again become whole
and the time has come for me to part
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Past Hurts
Past hurts are the building blocks of my wall
With each hateful word I recall
Another brick is placed
I do not want to be again defaced
Painful memories of depart
I am afraid of another false heart
What if they are a liar
and I build my wall higher
and now no one can see
Who is the real me
In the end I am the only one who loses
I must forget about my abuses
And begin to destroy my wall
Because in the end it will be my downfall
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Political Lies
People in power
Make rules to suit themselves
In hopes to devour
With no regard to how it affects anyone else
Injustices to the real world
The ones who live in it suffer
As their ideas are forcefully hurled
The rest of us suffer
Why should we put our lives on hold
For people who have sold their soul
In the search of fool’s gold
Instead of keeping ourselves whole.
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21. Who are you to choose someone else’s beliefs
Because of your political views
Spewing another motif
There you go tainting people’s hues
Pushing your beliefs onto the masses
Not your decision to make
Thinking we wear tinted glasses
We are awake
Keep your lies close to your heart
for our soul shine bright
We know the kindred will never part
As much as it would be to your delight
So we say to you
Keep to yourself your decay
We will always stay true
And live our true way.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Rainbow Dreams
I dream of a day when the color of someone's skin no longer matters...rainbow dream.
I dream of a day when your sexual preference no longer matters...rainbow dream.
I dream of a day when your choice of religion no longer matters...rainbow dream.
I dream of a day when prejudices will no longer exist...rainbow dream.
I dream of a day when people will look at what is in your heart & soul instead...rainbow dream.
I guess I will continue dreaming my dream, but for all of you who dream my dream with me...I love you!
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Sister of the Night
She came into my life as quickly as she left…
as if she were an apparition or a creature of the night.
Giving me a glimpse into our soul, just enough to entice me
before she became one with the
shadows of the night.
As I Looked at her paintings,
I realized she painted what was in my soul, in our soul.
She expresses by brush and paint what
I expressed by pen and ink.
So similar were we, my lost soul mate, my sister, my sister of the night...
so similar that it was so comforting, yet scary.
It was as if I was staring into a mirror straight into my very soul.
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22. Knowing she was out there, yet not knowing where,
was as if I was missing part of myself.
Finding one another made me whole.
Once again she is gone and my empty soul cries for her.
The feeling of completeness has vanished into the shadows,
just like my sister of the night.
This is dedicated to my sister of the night.
I know you are out there somewhere hiding in the shadows,
I just pray that you are safe and that our paths cross once again
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Something I Can Never Have
My desire for you burns deep inside
A flame that will not be extinguished
As much as I have tried
My thoughts and visions of you
Fuel the flame
I wonder if you are to blame
Tempting me with
Something I can never have
I close my eyes only to see visions of you
Beautiful you,
Leaving me left without a clue
Of where to go from here
As you leave my life and disappear
I picture eyes that pull me deep
inside your soul
And leave me with passions
Out of my control
I picture perfect lips that I kissed in the past
But can never kiss again,
Visions I hope fade fast,
and disappear like zen
Zen a moment most of us never know
Showing us true atonement
Letting us bask in it’s glow
Just for a brief moment
Never to be felt again
Leaving us to dwell in our sin.
_________________________________________________________________________________________
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23. Soul Searching
Soul searching
Thoroughly researching
Thoughts flying around
Round and round
No conclusion do I come
Of where I am from
Nor where I am going
My thoughts are ever flowing
Years fly by
And still I look to the sky
Asking the same question
Why? Why? Why?
I know I am here for a reason
And there goes another season
And still I sit
What if? What if? What if?
What if I am not living up to my potential
Doing all of the things that are essential
To my soul surviving and being at peace
Sometimes I feel like I will cease
Cease before knowing the true meaning of life
And dying in a world full of strife
Not knowing who I really am
Maybe I am truly condemned
I have friends all around
Yet I feel as if I may drowned
Sometimes I feel like we are not on common ground
So for now I must wait
To find out my fate
So on my journey I will go
Till I get to the next plateau
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Take Our Country Back
Congress was put in place for a reason,
not so the president could commit treason.
The Constitution was written for our protection,
not written for the amusement of the elite.
It was not meant to be an inflection,
but to provide us security from their deceit.
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24. Amendments are being broken,
in the name of national security.
please keep them unbroken,
and keep their purity.
In reality it is a just a governmental ploy,
to take away our freedoms, privacy and civil rights.
Just another one of their decoys,
as they read us our last rites.
SOPA, CISPA ,The Patriot Act,
Disarming us, Drones Flying , NSA Spying
all unconstitutional attacks.
Our freedom is just an illusion,
we are no different than slaves.
The government adds to our confusion,
working to put us in our graves.
WAKE UP
PREPARE FOR THE ATTACK
STAND UP
TAKE OUR COUNTRY BACK!
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Tears of Blood
The tears I cry are not tears of water, but tears of blood. For the pain I feel can't be expressed by mere water.
I do not cry for myself, but for others who are feeling pain.
I cry for the sick & for the dying. I cry for the hungry & the homeless.
Don't you know there are many worse off than you & I, some who wish they could die.
Think about people who have lost someone near & dear to their heart, or people who are all alone in this world.
Everyone has problems, some worse off then others, but remember there is always someone worse off then you
& me.
People should be appreciative of what they been given. Stop & smell the flowers, feel the breeze & listen to the
sounds of nature. Now stop again & ask yourself the following question....Can I do all of these things? If you
answered yes, just think of all the things you have to be thankful for that others may not. Now say to
yourself.....I am lucky to be alive!
If people would just take the time to think about these things, then maybe there would be no more tears of
blood.
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Thank You
The gifts you gave,
show you are kind at heart,
and thoughtful in mind,
and in this day and age
that is hard to find.
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25. So thank you for the gifts,
and making me see,
that someone out there
was thinking of me.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Thoughts of You
Thoughts of you
falling from the heavens
gently drift into my mind
Just Like snowflakes
falling from the sky
that gently touch my cheek
What a beautiful vision
What beautiful thoughts
All swirling around above
when the perfect one
gently makes contact
as a gentle calmness
falls over my whole being
causing me to smile
I am at peace
All is right with the world
In this perfect moment where
time stands still and
only you & I exist
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Trick or Treat
Lies and deceit
Trick or treat
Maybe it stems from conceit
Written words to delight
His dream girl
How these words excite
No commitments to anyone
And I was stupid enough to of believed
Blinded by love
Soon to be deceived
A heart promised to another
But no intention to let me know
He says he does not love her
But she says they are to be married
And her to be his children's mother
Love eternal
He says to nocturnal
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26. Now that I am back in his life
He feels some completion
He said his completion lays with me
I make him complete?!!
Lies! Lies! Lies!
Fucking Deceit!
Trick or Treat
Keep himself emotionally saved
For the one he truly loves
How bright our future is paved
They feed you promises
Never intended to be kept
You wholeheartedly accept
Words of fairytale love
From someone of
a false heart
who had every intention of staying apart
Trick or Treat
Another defeat
_________________________________________________________________________________________
The True Terrorists
With every tragic event
another freedom is stripped
As they execute another play from their script,
we continue into descent
9/11 brought about violation
of our 4th
amendment
causing hesitation
in trusting our government
Sandy Hook say goodbye
to our 2nd
amendment right
the government is not our ally
shouldn't this ignite
anger in losing the right
to protect ourselves
Fluoride in our water
lowering our IQ
making it easier to lead us to slaughter
and bid us adieu
Carcinogens, pesticides and GMO's
poisons in our food
hitting us with another blow
making us sick and subdued
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27. What will it take
for us to of had enough
to finally make us break
to call their bluff
to stand up and fight
and take our country back
to stand up for our human right
and stop their attack
_________________________________________________________________________________________
The Underside
The pain I feel can't be described
because I live in a world on the underside.
It's a world of the future, a world of the past,
it's here & now & it's gonna last.
Look around & you will see,
a world filled with misery.
A world where dreams can not be,
and nightmares become reality.
The time has come to say goodbye,
to hopes & dreams & lullabies,
you've been abducted into the underside.
There is no use screaming, for no one can hear,
& there's no use for prayer because no one is there.
__________________________________________________________________________________________________
Unspoken Friends
There are many who claimed to be your friend, but few who truly are. It's usually the ones who never claim
their friendship, the ones who quietly stand by you & are there for you through unspoken words. They never
proclaim their friendship, yet they are always there for you & come through for you when no one else does. The
ones you'd never expect to be your friends, the unlikely ones, are your true friends. The ones who claim to be
your friends never seem to have the time of day for you, not even a phone call to say hello. Treat everyone as if
they are your friend because you never know who your next unspoken friend will be, or where you will meet.
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Waiting
Something so beautiful within grasps, but so far away.
Calling me in the night, giving me hope that my loneliness will subside
that my days will once again have meaning
and that my nights will be filled with passion
Passion that makes the world go round
love that is never to be found
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28. found again on this earth that we live
not live mere exist
waiting in the shadows
for something that will never come my way.
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
Walls
I see you
I want you
I need you
I love you
Up goes my wall
The wall that “I think” protects my heart
The wall that saves me from the pain
The wall that no one can ever overcome
The wall that pushes you away
Ultimately the wall that breaks the heart it was protecting
In the end all the wall did was keep me from my true love
_________________________________________________________________________________________
When Will We Learn
When will we learn to respect Mother Earth and all that she gives us? When will we learn to accept &
appreciate each other and all of our differences? We could learn so much from one another, if only we would
take the time to get to know each other instead of hating each other because of our differences. When will we
learn that we were not put on this earth to slowly destroy it, ourselves & each other? We were put here to love
and cherish the earth and humankind and to learn from one another and to grow. When will we learn from our
past mistakes? Have we not seen enough civilizations die off because of war caused by our fear of the
unknown, our hatred, our differences, our own stupidity, and our quest to be all powerful? Have we not seen
countless species die off in the name of advancement, technology, commercialization & science? When will we
learn not to kill our fellow human? The spirits above look down on their children in disbelief and wonder what
we could possibly do next. When will they learn, they wonder. I’ll tell you when we will learn. We will learn
when it is too late. We will learn when all of Mother Earth’s resources are gone. There will be no plant or
animal life left, just a barren land void of all life. We have become extinct. The sad thing is…..we did it to
ourselves.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
Yet Another Goodbye
Relationships go up and down
They spin all around
Jumping in head first
Not able to quench the thirst
not stopping to think of the consequence
or how things will become intense
when you realize the time has come to say goodbye
and you are going to cause another to cry
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29. Love at first site
Maybe you have finally found your knight
Fairytale romance come true
Never stopped to think it through
Falling in love with some I hardly knew
Pulling my head out of the clouds in time to realize
Getting to know my lover, started our demise
He was not what I wanted at all
Time to start the downfall
Downfall of something that started out beautiful
Only to end in something hurtful
Time has come to finally reveal
To this person how you feel
The dreaded goodbye
How you want to deny
That it has come to this
Another relationship that has gone amiss
Heartbreak that could have been stopped in its tracks
If only I would of thought of the drawbacks
of not throwing caution to the wind
and first becoming someone’s friend
Getting to know someone first
Before feeling the relationship was coerced
By your own heart
Because you didn’t want to cause pain by your depart
If only I would of taken things a day at a time
I would not now feel as though I have committed a crime
The crime of ripping someone’s heart out of their chest
They probably think it was just another conquest
Now I think maybe I will never date again
I will live without sin
The sin of hurting another soul
And leaving me with this empty hole
But it would not be fair to me
To stay in a relationship that made me unhappy
To save causing someone else pain
Sometime you just have to be inhumane
All poetry and writings by Magan S. Edinger
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