2. tion of clear communication.
• Explain why hearing is not necessarily
listening.
• Identify obstacles to good listening.
• Define active listening, clarifying, and para-
phrasing.
• State key actions for improving listening
skills.
• Evaluate your listening skills at work.
focusfocus
WHY DOES LISTENING MATTER?
On the morning of an important presentation, Allison woke with
a bad cold—
and hardly any voice. She called Brad, who had helped put the
presentation
together, and asked him to take over for her. She gave Brad the
time and lo-
cation for the presentation and said, “My slides are in a box on
the top of my
desk. Better go through them—they might be out of order.” She
also told
him to remember that the clients had said they limit the
presentation to a
maximum of 45 minutes, including the question-and-answer
session. “These
people want a chance to ask questions,” she said, “so be sure
you leave enough
time.”
3. While he was on the phone with Allison, Brad went through his
calen-
dar and made a list of appointments and meetings he would need
to change
or cancel. He also downloaded a copy of the proposal so he
could review it.
When Allison finished speaking, he said, “Don’t worry. Get
some rest and
let me take care of the presentation.”
After making his phone calls and reviewing the proposal, Brad
grabbed
the slides and hurried out of the building so he could get to the
clients’
offices on time. Unfortunately, he didn’t notice that the slides
were out of
order until he had already started the presentation, so he had to
stop for sev-
eral minutes to reorganize them. He still finished the slide show
within the
time limit, but there was no time left for questions.
When Allison returned to the office two days later, she learned
that the
client had awarded the contract to a competing firm.
Brad made two mistakes that might have contributed to the loss
of this
important contract. He failed to organize the slides before the
presentation,
and he didn’t leave time for questions. What happened? Why
did Brad make
such serious mistakes?
Brad did not pay enough attention when Allison explained what
5. WHAT IS GOOD LISTENING?
We always hear what someone says. But there is a big
difference between
“hearing” and “listening.” What do you think the difference is?
“Hearing” is physiological. Your ears register sounds of all
kinds—the
drone of an airplane flying overhead, music from the radio, a
child’s laugh,
the words someone speaks. But hearing someone’s words is only
the begin-
ning. It’s what you do when you hear the words that makes the
difference
between hearing and listening.
Hearing is a passive process. It just happens. In fact, although
you can
close your eyes to shut out visual images, you cannot close your
ears to shut
out sounds. Listening, however, is an active process that
requires energy and
engages your mind. When you listen, you pay attention,
interpret the words,
understand them, and, if appropriate, respond to them. Real
communication
happens when you not only hear but understand a speaker’s
message.
When you really listen, you do several things:
• Consciously focus on the speaker, ignoring external or internal
distractions
so you can pay attention to the words, tone of voice, and body
language.
• Interpret the message by actively engaging your mind to make
8. • Rehearsing
• Impatience
• Lack of interest
• Distrust
• Differences in status, gender, and culture
E
companion. A jackhammer outside the presentation room makes
it impossi-
ble to hear the speaker. Traffic noise keeps you from hearing
the person who
has called on your cell phone.
When you cannot control noise that prevents you from listening,
let the
other person know that you cannot hear what they are saying.
That way, the
person will not think you are listening when you are not.
Distractions
Like Brad, you will find it hard to listen when your attention is
on other
things, people keep interrupting the conversation, or something
interesting
is going on nearby. Just as you cannot keep yourself from
hearing noise, you
cannot stop yourself from becoming distracted—thoughts pop
into your
mind; people come into the room. What you can do is notice
when a dis-
traction is keeping you from listening. If possible, re-focus your
attention on
the speaker. If you are unable to overcome the distraction, say,
9. “I’m sorry.
I’m having trouble listening to you right now. I know that what
you have to
say is important—can we talk about it later?”
Assumptions
Imagine that while you are listening to the following
conversation, you are
suddenly able to hear what Carlos is thinking.
JULIANNA: Oh, hi, Carlos. I’m glad to see you. Could you
come into my office for
a minute? There’s something we need to talk about.
CARLOS: (Uh-oh, she wants to tell me that she hates the
proposal, after all the work I
did on it.) Uh...I’m kind of busy right now.”
JULIANNA: This won’t take long. By the way, I thought you
did a great job with the
proposal.
CARLOS: Thanks. (Now she’s going to say, “But I hate it. . .
.”)
JULIANNA: I know your schedule is pretty full this week. . . .
CARLOS: You can say that again. (“I don’t care what she says.
I’m not re-doing the
proposal.”)
JULIANNA: But. . .
CARLOS: Look, I did the best I could with that proposal, and if
you don’t like it,
maybe you should get someone else to do it over.
JULIANNA: (After a moment’s hesitation) I thought I said that
I liked the proposal.
12. You might feel impatient when you want someone to finish what
they
are saying so you can get back to work or express your own
ideas. You might
also feel impatient when people repeat themselves or take too
long to get to
the point. Whatever the reason, you stop listening. You might
convey your
irritation nonverbally through your facial expression or body
language, or
you might interrupt the person before he or she is finished.
When you feel impatient with a speaker, try to identify the
reasons. If you
really are too busy to listen, you might say, “I’m sorry, I have
to finish this work
by noon. Can we talk after lunch?” If the person seems too
long-winded, ask
questions to help him or her get the point across: “So you are
saying that we
have two problems with the phone conferencing system, not just
one?”
Lack of Interest
We spend a lot of our time listening. But only a small
percentage of the in-
formation we hear is of immediate interest and use.
If you are not interested in what someone is saying, try to find a
reason
why it might be meaningful or important. You might say, “I’m
sorry, but I
need to know why you’re telling me this,” or “Can you tell me
what the con-
nection is between the purpose of this meeting and what you’re
13. talking about
right now?” Sometimes you can elevate your interest simply by
understand-
ing that giving the person the chance to talk about the topic—
perhaps a prob-
lem he or she is having—is what’s important.
Think About It . . .
Remember a time when you felt bored during a conversation.
Why were you bored? Were there
any questions you could have asked to determine why the
conversation was meaningful or
important?
_____________________________________________________
_________________
_____________________________________________________
_________________
_____________________________________________________
_______________________
Distrust
It is very hard to listen when you distrust the speaker’s motives
or the accu-
racy of what they are saying. That’s what happened to Andre.
Andre has been working with Marlena to improve her job
performance.
Several times in the past year, she has blamed mistakes she
made on other
people. Yesterday, Andre received an angry e-mail from a
customer who had
received someone else’s order instead of her own. When Andre
15. he could have
followed up to find out what really happened.
Differences in Status, Gender, and Culture
Think of a time when it was difficult to listen because you felt
uncomfort-
able with the other person or with the way the person was
speaking. That’s
what made it difficult for Robert to listen to June.
Robert disliked talking to June. She never looked him in the
eye, and
she spoke so softly that sometimes he could hardly hear her.
She also never
asked for anything directly. Instead, she made statements that
forced him to
guess at what she meant. He found it hard to pay attention
because he kept
wishing she would speak up, look him in the eye, and get to the
point.
Why did Robert have so much trouble listening to June?
Robert had trouble listening to June because her communication
style
was so different from his own. She was raised to believe that
women should
keep their eyes downcast when they spoke, speak softly, and not
be assertive.
These kinds of cultural and gender differences present an
obstacle to good
listening.
You might feel the same kinds of discomfort when you are
listening to
someone whom you perceive to have higher status than
17. In this dialogue, Ralph is explaining to a new employee, Ariana,
how the
department is set up. Is Ariana an active listener, or is she a
passive listener?
RALPH: So Michael takes the orders, reviews them, and passes
them on to Pe-
dro, who enters them into the system, unless there are any
problems.
You’ll start by working with Pedro. He’ll show you how to
process the
orders. Okay so far?
ARIANA: Uh-huh.
RALPH: The important thing is to make sure that once the
orders are processed
they get followed up. Okay?
ARIANA: Okay.
RALPH: Because sometimes things fall through the cracks, if
you know what I
mean.
ARIANA: Right.
In this dialogue, Ariana is a passive listener. She may or may
not understand
what Ralph is saying—but there is no way to tell from her
responses.
Let’s replay that dialogue. This time, Ariana is listening
actively.
RALPH: So Michael takes the orders, reviews them, and passes
them on to Pe-
19. that the speaker knows you are getting—or not getting—the
message. You
might ask questions that help the speaker clarify what he or she
is saying, or
you might paraphrase the speaker’s message so he or she knows
you have
heard it. Sometimes it’s not even what you say, it’s how you
behave that lets
the speaker know you have—or have not—gotten the message.
Exhibit 2–2 summarizes what you can do to listen actively.
Focus on the Speaker
Imagine that you are speaking to a small group that includes
Annie and
Lorenzo. Which of them is listening actively?
Annie sits slumped in her chair, and her eyes keep roving
around the
room. Every few moments she glances at her watch. She holds a
pen that she
keeps twirling in her fingers.
Lorenzo sits straight up in his chair, and he is leaning forward
slightly.
Every time you look his way he makes eye contact. He makes
occasional notes
on a tablet, and he nods and smiles at appropriate moments.
Annie does not appear to be listening actively. It seems as if her
mind is
elsewhere, or she is bored. Lorenzo, on the other hand, is
focusing his at-
tention on you, and his nonverbal responses indicate that he is
listening care-
fully to what you are saying.
21. paign?
JOE: I like the firm—they seem to know what they’re doing.
But what really
impressed me was the way the marketing campaign seems to be
just
what we need.
Notice the way in which Margo’s clarifying question helped Joe
focus
on what he was really trying to say. Clarifying lets speakers
know what de-
tails to add so listeners have enough information—and the right
information.
Clarifying also gives a speaker the chance to correct any
mistaken impres-
sions or misunderstandings, as you can see from the next part of
the dialogue
between Margo and Joe.
MARGO: So you think we should hire this firm?
JOE: No, I didn’t say that. We still have two more firms to
interview, and
their fees are pretty hefty. But I do think we should put them
high up
on the list.
Paraphrase to Summarize Meaning and Content
The third element in active listening is paraphrasing. When you
paraphrase,
you essentially repeat back what you heard the speaker say.
Like clarifying,
paraphrasing lets the speakers know they have been heard, and
it gives them
a chance to correct misunderstandings. Here’s more of Margo
24. already know
what the person is going to say.
3. ___ While someone is speaking, I try to avoid rehearsing
what I am going to
say next.
4. ___ I try not to let feelings of impatience interfere with my
ability to listen.
5. ___ When I feel uninterested in what someone is saying, I try
to understand
why it matters.
6. ___ When I find it hard to listen, I try to identify the obstacle
that is getting in
my way.
7. ___ I ask questions as needed to clarify what someone is
saying.
8. ___ When appropriate, I let the speaker know I have heard
the message by
paraphrasing his or her words.
E
Have a Reason for Listening
Much of the time we listen without thinking about the reasons
why. But with-
out a good reason for listening, your mind might wander and
you might be-
come impatient. To improve your listening skills, think about
your reasons
25. for listening. Do you need the information? Do you have a
general interest
in the topic? Do you want to know the speaker’s ideas or
opinions? Does the
speaker need an opportunity or chance to express herself on an
issue? The
better able you are to identify your reason for listening, the
better able you
will be to listen.
Participate in the Process
You have already learned that active listeners participate in the
communica-
tion process. The effort you make to pay attention, focus on the
speaker, ask
clarifying questions, and paraphrase as needed will pay off in
terms of more
effective communication. Your participation as an active
listener has another
benefit as well: It helps other people be better speakers. Your
attention and
questions demonstrate an interest in what the other person is
saying and help
him or her clarify the message.
Monitor Your Listening Behavior
Improving your listening skills takes practice, and practice
begins by in-
creasing your awareness of your listening behavior. Try to
notice when you
are allowing a distraction to interfere, assuming you know what
someone is
going to say, or rehearsing your response. No one listens
attentively all the
time. But when you catch yourself thinking about where you’re
going to eat
27. thing. Try to wait until the speaker has finished a thought
before respond-
ing. If you have a tendency to jump in too quickly, try using the
“ten-second
pause”—wait for ten seconds after the person seems to have
finished. That
brief delay allows you to process what the person said.
When Appropriate, Take Notes
Taking notes forces you to concentrate on what the speaker is
saying, and the
notes will be useful later by reminding you of points you might
otherwise
forget. The process of taking notes helps you follow the
speaker’s points and
identify questions you need to ask.
pply What You Learn . . .
For the next two weeks, make a log entry every day to note the
results of your new focus on im-
proving your listening skills.
Listening skills are essential for successful communication.
When you don’t listen, you can miss important information
or misunderstand what’s being said.
To be a good listener:
• Recognize that hearing is not necessarily listening.
• Be aware of obstacles such as noise and distractions that
make it hard to listen.
• Be patient and avoid making assumptions or “rehearsing”
when you are
29. (d)
(a) listen politely and keep your face impassive.
(b) interrupt and say, “I’m sorry, but I’m just not interested in
this.”
(c) find a reason to walk away.
(d) understand what’s important or meaningful about it.
3. Which is a good reason to take notes while someone is
speaking? 3. (c)
(a) You don’t have to make eye contact with the speaker.
(b) You look as if you are taking the speaker seriously.
(c) The process helps you follow points and identify questions
to
ask.
(d) You don’t have to pay as much attention because you’ll have
the
notes to remind you.
4. To listen actively: 4. (a)
(a) paraphrase as needed to let the speaker know he or she has
been
heard.
(b) give the speaker your opinion, as needed, of what he or she
has
said.
(c) interrupt as needed to show that you are listening.
(d) nod your head briskly, as needed, to indicate that you are
pay-
ing attention.
LISTENING: THE FOUNDATION 25
32. to ask good questions.
• Describe and explain the uses of four types of
questions: open-ended, closed-ended, clarify-
ing, and probing.
• List key strategies for asking useful questions.
• Ask appropriate, relevant questions during an
interview.
• Ask questions to encourage participation in a
meeting.
• Ask questions to elicit information in difficult
situations.
focusfocus
WHY ASK QUESTIONS?
Much of the time you spend communicating is actually spent
asking ques-
tions. If a client wants a cost estimate for a project, you need to
ask the pur-
pose of project, the client’s objectives, the timetable, and so on.
If your team
members want help with a problem, you need to ask questions to
identify the
problem and its causes before you can help them find a solution.
Think about some of the questions you have asked during the
past few
days. What were your reasons for asking those questions?
33. Question:
_____________________________________________________
___
Reason for asking:
________________________________________________
Question:
_____________________________________________________
___
Reason for asking:
________________________________________________
Question:
_____________________________________________________
___
Reason for asking:
________________________________________________
You might have come up with some of the common reasons for
asking
questions shown in Exhibit 4–1.
Asking Questions to Get Information
If a colleague came to you and said, “Can you give me some
feedback on my
report?” how would you know what kind of feedback she
wanted: whether
the report presented the details clearly, whether the ideas in the
report were
sound, whether the format was effective, or does she simply
want you to
proofread the report for typographical errors? Unless she tells
you exactly
what she needs, you would have to ask questions. You would
also ask ques-
tions to learn the right way to carry out a procedure, elicit
details about job
applicant’s experience, or uncover the reasons for an accident.
35. Asking Questions to Help People Think Things Through
Has someone ever come to you for advice about how to do
something, such
as write a proposal? Instead of telling the person how to write
the proposal,
you could use questions to help the person decide what he or
she wants to
say and figure out the best way to say it. You might ask,
“Who’s going to read
this proposal? Exactly what do you want your readers to do?
Why should
they do what you want?” You can use the same technique to
help people think
about problems and come up with a solution. The questions
might be, “Can
you describe the situation that needs to be changed? Why does
it need to be
changed? Who’s involved?” and so on.
Asking Questions to Encourage
Participation in a Meeting or Team Effort
People participate more actively when they are involved, and
one way of in-
volving people is to ask questions. Questions encourage people
to participate
in discussions, think about issues, and come up with ideas. For
example, to
kick off a discussion, you might ask your group, “What ideas do
you have for
marketing our new product?”
Asking Questions to Create or Maintain a Relationship
In addition to the more pointed functions discussed above,
questions can serve
the purpose of building or maintaining a relationship. For
example, asking, “How
41. Questions Questions
• To involve the How do you plan • To get quick Are you
willing
other person to finish this answers to work next Saturday?
job on time?
• To invite a • To obtain Would you like this
lengthy or Why did you leave information desk or that one?
thoughtful response your last job? efficiently
Did you find the
• To solicit opinions What ideas do you • To get workshop
useful?
have for solving commitment
this problem?
E
Ask closed-ended questions only when you want a short,
succinct
answer: “How many people will attend the meeting?” “Are you
going to hire
a new sales representative?” or “Can you send me the report by
Friday?”
Otherwise, ask open-ended questions that encourage the other
person to pro-
vide details, develop a topic, or give an explanation.
Which of the following are open-ended questions?
a. “Why did they say they had changed the design?”
43. try the new position?
• To check out your • To encourage In what ways did
assumptions and Are you saying that speaker you use . . .?
verify your under- you find working with to express ideas
standing Tony difficult? and feelings Why do you think . . .?
What concerns you What happened next?
about the move, the
disruption or working Tell me why you
at the new facility? plan to. . . .
When will . . .?
How do you
expect to . . .?
E
won’t be in the office at all on Friday? Or will you be out only
in the morn-
ing?” “Did you say that the sales figures will be better this
quarter, or that
we sold more products?” “Are you worried about meeting the
deadline?”
Some clarifying questions simply repeat the original question in
another
way, as in this dialogue:
LAURA: I am so angry about the change in work schedule.
JASON: Are you upset because your hours are going to change?
LAURA: I’ll never be able to get my son to school and get here
on time.
44. JASON: So you think that you’ll need to start too early?
LAURA: I can’t possibly get here before 8:00.
JASON: It sounds as if 7:30 won’t work for you. Is that right?
LAURA: That’s right.
Jason is trying to understand exactly what Laura doesn’t like
about the
new schedule. To do that, he can rephrase the same question,
“What upsets
you about the schedule?” until Laura gives him a clear answer.
Probing Questions
Think about the way in which you search the Internet. You
begin with a
general question: “A place to stay in southern France?” A list of
web sites
appears. You choose one that looks promising. It gives you
general informa-
tion, including an agency that handles rentals in Provence. You
click on the
name of the agency. When the web site appears, you click again,
this time
on the menu item, “Charming country hotels.” As you move
from web site
to web site, each click of the mouse is like a probing question.
Your ques-
tions become more and more specific until you have enough
information—
in this case, the perfect charming country hotel in a village near
Avignon.
In this dialogue, notice how Andy uses probing questions to get
more
specific information from Anita.
ANDY: What did you think of the new product brochures I sent
46. open-ended
questions although you might begin asking closed-ended
questions as you get
closer to the end of the series.
Think About It . . .
Watch or listen to a television or radio interviewer such as
Larry King, Ray Suarez, Barbara Wal-
ters, or Terry Gross. Notice the types of questions the
interviewer asks and how the person uses
different types of questions to elicit more and more specific
information. On the lines below, write
several questions you thought were especially useful.
Interviewer:
_____________________________________________________
_____________
Questions:
_____________________________________________________
_____________
_____________________________________________________
_________________
_____________________________________________________
_________________
_____________________________________________________
_________________
_____________________________________________________
_________________
_____________________________________________________
51. _____________________________________________________
_________________
_____________________________________________________
_______________________
Ask the Right Type of Question
As you learned earlier in this chapter, there are different types
of questions.
The types of questions you ask depend on such factors as the
situation and
your purpose. Which type of questions would be most effective
in each of
the situations in Exercise 4–1?
Exercise 4–1
Instructions: For each of the situations below, circle the type or
types of questions that would be
most effective.
Situation 1
Sandy needs to ask Marvin, who works in Accounting, whether
a vendor has been paid. Marvin
is very friendly and likes to talk. In fact, when Marvin is asked
almost any question, he is likely
to answer with a great deal of unnecessary information. What
type or types of questions should
Sandy ask?
a. closed-ended b. open-ended c. clarifying d. probing
Situation 2
Bruno is interviewing Delilah, who has applied for a position in
his department. When Bruno asks
why she has applied for the position, Delilah says, “It sounded
52. interesting.” What type or types
of questions should Bruno ask?
a. closed-ended b. open-ended c. clarifying d. probing
✎
Answers to Exercise 4–1
Situation 1
Sandy should use closed-ended questions, which are more likely
to focus Marvin on the infor-
mation she needs without encouraging him to add unnecessary
information. For instance, she
might say, “Did Vendor X receive a check?” instead of, “What
can you tell me about the payment
situation for Vendor X?” If she needs additional information,
she can continue to ask closed-
ended questions: “Did you receive the invoice Vendor X sent on
such and such a date?” “Can I
tell Vendor X that she will receive her check by the end of the
month?”
Situation 2
Bruno should ask open-ended, probing questions. He could
begin with a broad question such
as, “What sounded interesting about the position?” and then
continue to probe for more infor-
mation by asking for more specifics.
Be Sure the Question Is Relevant, Necessary, and Appropriate
Francine’s question about whether Benito was enjoying himself
at the com-
pany threw the conversation off track and brought in
53. information that was
not relevant to Benito’s job performance. While you might use
that kind of
question to establish rapport at the beginning of a meeting or
interview, it is
not helpful during the interview itself. Inappropriate questions,
such as
Francine’s question about the election, can also throw a
conversation off track.
They can also offend people or make them uncomfortable.
Before asking a question, think about whether it serves a
purpose and is
relevant to the topic at hand. Consider what would happen if
you didn’t ask
that question. Sometimes it’s helpful to wait for 10 seconds
before asking a
question so you can consider how to phrase it or whether to ask
it at all.
Be especially careful to avoid questions that might be offensive
or cause
discomfort. The problem might be the content, such as
Francine’s question
about the election. In the workplace, it is usually best not to
inquire about a
person’s politics, religion, sexual preference, or personal life.
Sometimes the problem is not so much the content as it is the
way a
question is asked. Think about how you would feel if you were
asked ques-
tions like the ones shown below:
“Why did you dye your hair that color?”
“Don’t you think you’re being too sensitive?”
55. and they do not realize that the question is unclear. But people
also ask un-
clear questions because they haven’t figured out what they want
to know, as
in this example:
TRACY: Jean-Paul, I heard that some people have been having
trouble with the
new invoice processing procedures, and I agree that they are
sort of con-
fusing, although I’m not sure what I can do about it, but maybe
you
could fill me in?
If you were Jean-Paul, could you tell from Tracy’s rambling
question
what she really wants to know? Probably not. Tracy might not
know herself.
If she did, she could ask the question more clearly:
TRACY: Jean-Paul, I heard that some of the staff have been
having trouble with
the new invoice processing procedures. I agree that the
procedures are
a little confusing, and I’d like to help if I can. Can you tell me
who is
having trouble, and what it is about the procedures that they
don’t un-
derstand?
Give People Time to Respond
What do you think is going on in the following situation? How
do you think
Julia feels?
SUZANNE: I’d like your opinion about Mario’s suggestion that
57. “Listen” to more than the other person’s words. As you learned
in Chap-
ter 2, real listening means paying attention to nonverbal cues
such as tone of
voice and facial expressions because those cues often give you
more infor-
mation than people’s words. Dissonance between what people
say and their
nonverbal expressions can indicate that the words might not be
an accurate
indication of what they really think or feel.
What do you think might be going on in this example?
Bill asks Jeffery, “Would you mind working overtime
tomorrow?” Jef-
fery replies, “Uh, sure, no problem.” But his tone is clipped and
abrupt, he
frowns, and he looks down at the floor as he speaks.
The nonverbal cues conflict with Jeffery’s words, implying that
he cer-
tainly would mind working overtime. If Bill “listens” carefully,
he can check
out his perception by asking a clarifying question and giving
Jeffery a chance
to back out: “Are you sure that it’s all right for you to work
overtime to-
morrow? If not, I’ll be glad to ask someone else.”
Think About It . . .
Look for opportunities to notice the ways in which people ask
questions. What do they do that
works? What might they do differently so their questions are
more useful?
59. views, read any relevant material that might be available.
Develop a list of questions to ask. You might not ask them all,
but cre-
ating the list helps you focus on the information you need. The
list can also
be a useful reference during the interview, reminding you of
important ques-
tions you might otherwise forget to ask. Consider providing the
interviewee
with some questions ahead of time so he or she can prepare by
thinking about
the answers or gathering necessary documents.
Choose the Right Time and Place
A private, comfortable setting and a convenient time go a long
way toward
determining the success of any interview. Few people are
comfortable being
interviewed in public, especially if the interview is of a
personal nature,
such as a hiring or job performance interview, or the topic is
sensitive or
confidential.
Look for a private place where you will not be disturbed, and
set the
place up so that both you and the interviewee will be
comfortable. If possi-
ble, arrange seating at the corner of a table or in comfortable
chairs placed
at an angle to one another. Minimize distractions by arranging
for your calls
to go into voicemail or be answered by someone else—and turn
off cell
phones. Schedule the interview for a time when neither you nor
61. To conduct an interview, you will use everything you have
learned in this
chapter about asking questions. The success of the interview
will depend to
a large extent on whether you ask the right type of questions
and whether
you listen carefully to responses.
Notice how the questions Sylvia asks throw this interview off
track:
SYLVIA: Karl, can you tell me why you’re interested in
working for our
company?
KARL: My friend told me that it’s a great company to work for.
SYLVIA: Well, we always like to hear that! What department
does your friend
work in?
KARL: She’s in Purchasing.
SYLVIA: We have a lot of good people in Purchasing. Has she
been here long?
KARL: I don’t know. We only met a couple of weeks ago.
Except for the first one, Sylvia’s questions are unlikely to help
her learn
whether Karl is qualified for the position with her company. To
keep the in-
terview on track, what question might she have asked after Karl
mentioned
his friend?
Sylvia might have asked, “What was it she said about the
company that
interested you?” The answer to that question would have
65. You already know that questions are key to eliciting
information during
an interview. Questions are also an effective way to increase
response and
participation in groups. When you “tell” people something, they
might hear
what you say without realizing that you want a response. Even
general ques-
tions like Jeremy’s might not elicit much participation. But
when you make
it clear that you are interested in people’s ideas, information, or
feedback,
they will be more likely to respond.
Exhibit 4–7 shows some strategies for using questions to
encourage par-
ticipation in meetings.
Create a Safe Environment
To feel comfortable sharing ideas and asking questions, people
need to know
that it’s okay to say whatever is on their mind and even to ask
“dumb” ques-
tions. Establish ground rules specifying that everyone’s idea is
to be taken se-
riously and every question or concern is important.
Ask Specific, Open-ended Questions
Not only were Jeremy’s questions too general, they were closed-
ended ques-
tions, making it easy for the members of the group to answer
with a shake
of their heads. What if Jeremy said something like, “Now that
you’ve heard
the team reports, what questions do you have about these
projects?” or “Now
67. people pass if they wish). That way, people will learn that you
are interested
in hearing from everyone.
Send Out Questions Ahead of Time
If people know you will be asking certain questions, they can
think about how
they might respond. For example, Jeremy might have sent
around an e-mail
asking people to come prepared with ideas for handling the
problem of the
overbooked meeting rooms. That way, he had a better chance of
getting a
lively discussion going.
Think About It . . .
Think about a meeting you will be facilitating. List some
actions you can take before the meet-
ing and some questions to ask during the meeting to encourage
participation and discussion.
Brief description of meeting:
____________________________________________________
To do before the meeting:
_____________________________________________________
_
_____________________________________________________
_________________
_____________________________________________________
_________________
68. Questions to ask during the meeting:
______________________________________________
_____________________________________________________
_________________
_____________________________________________________
_________________
_____________________________________________________
_________________
_____________________________________________________
_______________________
Meeting by Telephone
When you meet with people by telephone, it takes a special
effort to keep the meeting on track, in-
clude everyone, and make sure that everyone knows who’s
speaking. Here are some
suggestions:
• Send out a meeting agenda, questions to think about, and
supplementary information ahead
of time.
• Use people’s names when addressing them: “Andrew, what do
you think about Marie’s idea
for improving the . . .?”
• Keep a list of names in front of you so you can keep track of
who is participating and who
is not: “Sienna, we haven’t heard your ideas yet. What
suggestion would you make for . . .?”
70. LUCINDA: (shrugs) Maybe. I talk to 20 people a day. Look,
I’ve got a pile of work
on my desk. . . .
PAT: I understand, but I really need to straighten this out. Why
was this
account cancelled before we sent a warning notice?
LUCINDA: (in an angry tone) What am I supposed to do? It’s
not my fault. Can I
go now?
People resist answering questions for various reasons. They
might feel
uncomfortable because they think they are supposed to come up
with a “right”
answer. They might feel that the questions are putting them on
the spot.
The questions might feel threatening to them, as if they are
being accused
of something.
Lucinda’s tone, facial expressions, and body language were
obvious cues
that she did not want to answer Pat’s questions—that she would,
in fact, re-
sist answering them as long as possible. What do you think Pat
might have
done when he became aware of those cues?
One thing Pat might have done was to try to relieve some of the
pres-
sure on Lucinda. He might have restated his initial question
with a preface:
“I know this is a difficult situation for you. Mr. Maldenado has
72. questions. . . . I need the
information so I can give my manager a budget request for a
new sales assistant.”
Be Patient
Some people need extra time to put their ideas into words. They
feel rushed
or pressured if they’re expected to have an answer on the tip of
their tongues.
Allow a long pause after you finish the question. You might
even say, “Take
your time.” During the pause, try to relax and do nothing but
wait. If the
person still has trouble answering, you might offer time to
think: “Why don’t
you think about this for a while? I’ll stop by later this afternoon
to see what
ideas you’ve come up with.”
Rephrase the Question
If you are not getting the answers you had expected, perhaps the
person
didn’t understand the question. You might say, “I’m sorry, that
question might
not have been clear. What I meant to say was. . . .”
Let the Person Know You Appreciate
and Value Their Responses
“What a good observation—I had not thought of that. Now let
me ask you.
. . .”; “I can really use your help with [this situation]”; “You
know so much
about [this situation or topic], and I would really like to know
what you think
about. . . .”
74. can you finish the report by the fifteenth of the month?” “Did
the customer
tell you that the technician showed up on the wrong date?” “Are
you willing
to make the presentation if Frank can’t do it?”
Think About It . . .
Think about a time in which you were having trouble getting
answers to your questions. What
do you think might have been going on? What might you have
said or done differently to en-
courage a more helpful response?
Try It Yourself
Work with a partner to practice the techniques you learned in
this section. Ask your partner to
resist answering your questions about a specific topic. Try the
techniques to help you get the re-
sponses you need. Reverse roles and repeat the activity, and
then discuss the results.
pply What You Learn . . .
For the next two weeks, try out specific techniques learned in
the chapter and record the results
in your log. Write down the techniques you used, what worked
and what didn’t, and what you
might do differently in the future.
The questions you ask and the way you ask them are important
to clear communication. You ask questions to get information
from people, clarify understanding, help people think things
through, and encourage participation in a meeting. The types
of questions you ask—open-ended, closed-ended, clarifying,
76. • For meetings, send out questions ahead of time when
appropriate, and use
questions to encourage participation.
• When people resist answering questions, be patient and remain
calm; make
sure they know the reasons for your questions; and if necessary,
ask closed-
ended questions to get the information you need.
Review Questions
1. Open-ended questions: 1. (c)
(a) can be answered with a “yes” or a “no.”
(b) are the best way to get a succinct response from a talkative
person.
(c) encourage people to expand on their ideas.
(d) should not be used in a job interview.
2. Which is an appropriate question to ask during a hiring
interview? 2. (a)
(a) What interests you about working for our company?
(b) Who did you vote for in the presidential election?
(c) Do you plan on having children?
(d) What church do you go to?
3. If you don’t get a helpful answer to your question, you can 3.
(b)
assume that:
(a) the other person doesn’t want to answer.
(b) you might not have asked the question clearly.
(c) the question did not need to be asked.
(d) you didn’t listen carefully enough to the response.
4. Which would be the most useful question to get a discussion
79. focusfocus
WHAT IS “COMMUNICATION”?
We hear the word communication everywhere these days as
technological ad-
vances make it possible for us to communicate in an increasing
number of
ways. But what does the word communication really mean?
No matter what the form of communication or whether it is one-
way or
interactive, between individuals or within a group,
communication takes place
only when a message sent by one person has been received and
understood
by another person. That’s what Jory didn’t realize.
Feeling rushed by a looming deadline for a report her manager
wanted
right away, Jory asked Saul to help by getting her some
marketing statistics.
“I need the figures from the last three years,” she said. “Will
that be a prob-
lem?”
“Not at all,” Saul replied.
But by mid-day, Saul had still not gotten the statistics to Jory—
and her
report was due first thing in the morning. Saul was out, so she
left him a
voicemail: “This is Jory,” she said. “I was wondering, how soon
do you think
you can get me those stats for the marketing report?”
82. Managers communicate to:
• Pass on and receive information.
• Establish and maintain relationships.
• Tell people what they are expected to do and help them learn.
• Give feedback and criticism.
• Encourage, motivate, and influence.
• Help others solve problems and develop action plans.
• Work with others to come up with new ideas.
E
Think About It . . .
Think of some communications you were part of that did not go
well. What were the results?
_____________________________________________________
_________________
_____________________________________________________
_________________
_____________________________________________________
_________________
_____________________________________________________
_________________
_____________________________________________________
_________________
_____________________________________________________
84. • Assumptions.
• Fears.
E
Lack of Time and Planning
Jory asked Saul to get her the statistics because she was feeling
rushed. In
fact, she was feeling so rushed that she didn’t even take enough
time to think
about what she wanted him to do. As a result, she conveyed an
incomplete
message.
People commonly blurt out their messages without thinking,
especially
when they feel rushed. Sometimes those messages come out
clearly; often,
they do not. If you expect others to understand your messages,
you must first
be sure that you know exactly what you want to say.
Competing Messages
We receive thousands of messages every day. They come at us
in every di-
rection, competing for our attention. The telephone rings and an
e-mail lands
in your mailbox while you are trying to conduct an interview;
people are
telling jokes in the next cubicle while you are trying to explain
something to
an employee; newspaper headlines catch your attention and a
radio talk show
blares in your ear while you are trying to help a colleague solve
85. a problem.
Screening out the unnecessary messages can be almost
impossible, but un-
less we can screen them out, we will find it hard to pay
attention to relevant,
useful messages.
Differences in Knowledge, Perspectives, Needs, Expectations,
Priorities, Status, Culture, and Gender
Jory’s miscommunication to Saul occurred partly because they
had differing
priorities. Jory’s top priority was getting the report to her
manager on time.
Although Saul was willing to help, he felt no sense of urgency
because the
report was not important to him.
In the same way, it can be hard to communicate clearly to
someone who
has a very different level of knowledge from your own or a very
different
point of view about the topic. For example, suppose you need to
explain how
to use word processing software to someone who has never used
a computer.
You might not stop to think about the basic computer
knowledge the person
needs to have before the new software can be learned.
Communication would be far easier if other people had your
level of
knowledge, background, sense of what was important, and way
of looking at
the world. The reality is that people differ in many ways. Those
differences
have a great many advantages, but they also mean that we have
87. _____________________________________________________
_______________________
Fears
Instead of saying what we mean, we sometimes convey
messages that are lit-
tle more than hints. We leave out key information. We say Yes
when we mean
No. We also hesitate to speak up when we don’t understand
what someone
else is saying. Why do we behave this way? Why don’t we just
say what we
mean, and why don’t we ask questions when someone sends us a
confusing
message?
People do not always say what they mean because they are
afraid of
what will happen if they do. They do not want to hurt people’s
feelings, dis-
appoint them, or make them angry. They also do not want to
take the risk
of appearing foolish or being disliked. But indirect, incomplete,
and vague
messages make it difficult or impossible to achieve real
communication.
Think About It . . .
What are communications that you find difficult? Think of a
time when you felt unable to say
what you meant or when you did not feel comfortable asking
questions when someone was un-
clear. What were the results?
90. 16. ___ When facilitating a meeting, I am able to ask questions
that encourage
participation.
17. ___ I am able to use communication skills to help people
learn.
18. ___ I am able to give a successful presentation to a small
group of people
I know.
19. ___ I am able to give a successful presentation to any group.
20. ___ I am able to communicate clearly, confidently, and
successfully in writing.
E
fact, you will find that the key actions presented in Exhibit 1–4
apply to all the
forms of communication we will discuss.
Know and Respect Your Audience
Two of the key actions for communicating clearly are knowing
and respect-
ing your audience. Throughout the course, you will be asked to
look at your
message from your audience’s point of view. By doing that, you
increase the
chances that the message you send will be understood.
Know Why You are Communicating
As we mentioned earlier in this chapter and will repeat from
time to time,
knowing what you want to achieve by communicating is
essential for your
92. To communicate clearly:
• Know and respect your audience.
• Know why you are communicating.
• Know what you want to say.
• Pay attention.
• Keep an open mind.
• Be specific.
• Take enough time.
E
the way of listening, making it difficult or impossible for real
communica-
tion to take place.
Be Specific
The more specific your messages, the more useful information
you will con-
vey. Hints and vague messages lead to misunderstandings and
confusion. To
communicate successfully, try to use specific language that
communicates ex-
actly what you want to say.
Take Enough Time
Trying to communicate in a hurry leads people to stumble over
their words,
leave out important information, and miss what others have to
say. As you
will learn in this course, the time you spend planning a
communication,
delivering a message, and listening to others will pay off in
fewer misunder-
94. 1. (c)
communication is to:
(a) speak loudly.
(b) repeat your message at least once.
(c) pay attention.
(d) use polite phrases such as Please.
2. Which statement accurately describes communication? 2. (a)
(a) A message that has been received and understood
(b) The act of sending a message
(c) Active listening
(d) The art of using language to impress people
3. Learning to communicate clearly is important to managers
because: 3. (b)
(a) most managers communicate poorly.
(b) poor communications make it difficult to maintain good
relationships.
(c) managers spend almost 50 percent of their time giving
feedback
and criticism.
(d) open office systems have increased the amount of
communica-
tion managers need to do.
4. Which is an assumption that gets in the way of clear
communication? 4. (a)
(a) Not listening because you think you already know what the
other
person is going to say
(b) Rude behavior that makes the other person angry
(c) Interrupting someone before they are finished because you
96. Imagine that these are three of your articles for your literature
review. Please complete the following in responding to this
discussion thread.
1. List the article’s in APA format.
2. Write a 100 word annotation of each article in which you not
only summarize each article but also evaluate its theme (the
main point the article tries to make).
3) Once you have your annotations done, post a paragraph in
which you discuss the three sources and how they are related or
not related to each other. You should also list the three articles
in correct APA reference list documentation style.
Again, you are not necessarily using these articles in your
literature review. And you will not necessarily write about
CommunicationSkills for Managers for your research report
assignment. However, this exercise is designed to help you
become familiar with listing a source in APA format and with
writing an evaluative annotation for it that you can use as the
basis for discussions of articles with similar themes in your
literature review.
References
Chan, J. F. (2009). Chapter 2: Listening: The Foundation. In ,
Communication Skills for Managers, 5th Edition (pp. 11-26).
American Management Association International.
References
Chan, J. F. (2009). Chapter 4: The Art of Asking Questions. In ,
Communication Skills for Managers, 5th Edition (pp. 51-72).
American Management Association International.
References
Chan, J. F. (2009). Chapter 1: Communication: The Key to a
Manager's Success. In , Communication Skills for Managers,
5th Edition (pp. 1-10). American Management Association
International.