This document discusses the topic of singleness from a Christian perspective. It provides statistics showing declining marriage rates and church attendance among singles. The document discusses how singleness can be viewed as a gift based on biblical passages. Singles are called to use their gift to build up others, and can have an important role as spiritual parents. A healthy church community should show hospitality to both married and single members and not marginalize singles. Relationships in the church should be oriented around Christ rather than marital status.

1. Marriage ( 6 )
Singleness
Slides by: Timothy Chan, based on
John Piper’s “This Momentary Marriage”
& Tim Keller’s “The Meaning of Marriage”

2. Singleness
❖ (Q) What reasons can you think of that can explain
why we’re studying the topic of “singleness” in a
series on marriage?
❖ (1 Cor 7:29) This is what I mean, brothers: the
appointed time has grown very short. From now on,
let those who have wives live as though they had
none
❖ (Q) Why did apostle Paul say that?

3. Singleness
❖ Percentage of US adult population who’s married
70%
67.6%
60% 64.2%
61.0%
58.7%
56.2%
50% 54.3%
40%
30%
20%
10%
0%
1960 1970 1980 1990 2000 2009

4. Singleness
❖ Percentage of UK adult population who’s married
70%
68.1%
60% 63.3%
57.9%
50% 53.1%
47.5%
40%
30%
20%
10%
0%
1971 1981 1991 2001 2011

5. Singleness
❖ Percentage of US population who attends church
60%
50%
40%
30%
20%
10%
0%
% of Married Adults % of Single Adults
❖ (Q) Why are so few singles involved in church?

6. “This Momentary Marriage”
❖ John Piper’s book is titled “This Momentary
Marriage” because:
❖ Marriage is a temporary gift in this lifetime. We
will not be married in heaven.
❖ (Mark 12:25) For when they rise from the dead,
they neither marry nor are given in marriage, but
are like angels in heaven.
❖ Even though marriage won’t last forever, the church
will exist as a family forever.

7. Family Values?
❖ The theme of “reproduction” in the Old Testament:
❖ (Gen 1:28) … Be fruitful and multiply and fill the
earth and subdue it …
❖ (Gen 13:16) I will make your offspring as the dust
of the earth, so that if one can count the dust of
the earth, your offspring also can be counted.
❖ The covenant to Israel was primarily fulfilled
through procreation.

8. Family Values?
❖ But in the New Testament:
❖ Jesus and Paul were single and had no children.
❖ (Luke 14:26) If anyone comes to me and does not
hate his own father and mother and wife and
children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his
own life, he cannot be my disciple.
❖ (Matt 12:50) For whoever does the will of my
Father in heaven is my brother and sister and
mother.
❖ The new covenant family of God grows not by
biological offsprings but by regenerative faith in
Christ.

9. Avoid Idolizing Marriage and Children
❖ (1 Cor 7:29-31, NIV) What I mean, brothers and
sisters, is that the time is short. From now on those
who have wives should live as if they do not; those
who mourn, as if they did not; those who are happy,
as if they were not; those who buy something, as if it
were not theirs to keep; those who use the things of
the world, as if not engrossed in them. For this
world in its present form is passing away.
❖ We should avoid idolizing our marriage and our
children.
❖ (Q) What does it mean to “idolize” our marriage
and our children?

10. Avoid Idolizing Marriage and Children
❖ “Even the best marriage cannot by itself fill the void
in our souls left by God. Without a deeply fulfilling
love relationship with Christ now, and hope in a
perfect love relationship with him in the future,
married Christians will put too much pressure on
their marriage to fulfill them, and that will always
create pathology in their lives.” (Tim Keller)

11. Singleness is a Gift
❖ (1 Cor 7:7) I wish that all were as I myself am. But
each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and
one of another.
❖ (Q) Does singleness “feel” like a gift to you?
❖ Singles are badgered with: “You’re too picky” “We
want some grand kids, hurry up!” “I am praying for
you that you will find that special someone.”
❖ “It is no wonder that we singles struggle to maintain
a sense of joy and empowerment in our singleness,
when everyone around us seems to be praying
against it as if it were some rare and terminal form
of cancer.” (Kimberly Price, Relevant Magazine)

12. Singleness is a Gift
❖ “In his writings, Paul always uses the word “gift” to
mean an ability God gives to build others up.” (Tim
Keller)
❖ So the calling of being single is a call to “fruitfulness
in life and ministry through the single state. When
you have this gift, there may indeed be struggles, but
the main thing is that God is helping you to grow
spiritually and be fruitful in the lives of others
despite them.” (Tim Keller)

13. The Blessing of Singleness
❖ (Isaiah 56:4-5) To the eunuchs who keep my
Sabbaths, who choose the things that please me and
hold fast my covenant, I will give in my house and
within my walls a monument and a name better than
sons and daughters; I will give them an everlasting
name that shall not be cut off.

14. The Blessing of Singleness
❖ “Eunuch” = one who serves the king by remaining
single and childless
❖ Singles in Christ serve the “King”
❖ “Better than sons and daughters”
❖ Children are “born again” into God’s family by
faith. Christians have the responsibility to bear
spiritual children.
❖ (1 Cor 4:15) For though you have countless guides in
Christ, you do not have many fathers. For I became
your father in Christ Jesus through the gospel.
❖ So all Christians, married and single, are parents.

15. Gospel Values and Relationships
❖ Relationships in Christ are more permanent, and
more precious, than relationships in families.
❖ “I am declaring the radical truth that being in a
human family is no sign of eternal blessing, but
being in God’s family means being eternally
blessed.” (John Piper)

16. Gospel Values and Relationships
❖ (1 Cor 7:32) I want you to be free from anxieties. The
unmarried man is anxious about the things of the
Lord, how to please the Lord.
❖ Married people should learn from singles that no
earthly relationship is ultimate; your significance
in life is ultimately defined by your faithfulness to
Christ and relationship to Christ.

17. Hospitality
❖ (1 Peter 4:8-9) Above all, keep loving one another
earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins. Show
hospitality to one another without grumbling.
❖ We should show hospitality to both married and
single people in the church community.
❖ However, we tend to marginalize singles into their
“singles group.”
❖ “How members of the church relate to each other as
married and single will witness to the world that our
lives are oriented on the supremacy of Christ and
that our relationships are defined not just by nature,
but by Christ.” (John Piper)

18. Summary of Study #6
❖ 1 Cor 7:29-31 reminds us not to idolize our
marriages, our children, and our possessions.
❖ In New Testament times, the most lasting “family” is
not biological, but of those who are in the faith.
❖ Isaiah 56:4-5 promises singles an everlasting name
and a blessing better than sons and daughters.
❖ Those who are called to singleness are to use their
“gift” to build others up. Many singles are “spiritual
parents” raising “children” in the faith.
❖ In a healthy faith community, married and singles
build meaningful relationships with each other and
practice hospitality toward each other.

19. Additional References for Study #6
❖ “Singleness: A Gospel Freedom” by Ryan Kwan