This document provides advice for leaving a relationship with someone who has a Cluster B personality disorder and beginning custody proceedings. It recommends developing a safety plan through a domestic violence agency before leaving, securing important documents, opening new accounts, and moving to a different residence for safety. It warns that the Cluster B partner may secretly record communications and activities, so to avoid triggering behaviors and maintain a calm appearance for court. Limited contact through approved co-parenting apps is suggested, along with legal documentation of any abuse and retaining a lawyer experienced in high-conflict situations. Support is available through online groups and counseling.
Induction Slideshow Privacy And ConfidentialityD S
A slideshow intended for new youthworkers, as part of their induction. Gives basic information for anyone working with young people, so they are aware of their employers' expectations
Suspecting infidelity – dealing with suspected infidelity insolomon okere
Suspecting infidelity is a common relationship problem experienced by anybody in a love relationship. when dealing with suspected infidelity, one must be very careful not to destroy their flourishing intimate relationship. if you are dealing with suspected infidelity in your relationship, the steps discussed in this book will serve as a guide to help you. Stop suspecting infidelity in your relationship, deal with it.
Getting Ready for Marriage - A 7 Day Reading Plan - By Jim Burns and Doug FieldsDavid_C_Cook
Taken from their book "Getting Ready for Marriage," join
relationship experts Jim Burns and Doug Fields as they help you start planning now for your lasting union.
Finances, in-laws, communication, forgiveness, sexual expectations,
no topic is off-limits as you and your fiancé get ready to step from engagement into a life-long covenant to each other.
This presentation contains responses to the following question: "If there was one thing you wish your mother would have told you about sex and sexuality, what would ot have been?" I hope these responses add to the dialogue on parent-child communication around sex and sexuality. Enjoy!
There are 8 commitments you must make to protect your children during and after your divorce. 1. You must not fight with the other parent within hearing or sight of the children. 2. You must not say anything bad about the other parent to your child. 3. You must not confide your troubles to your children. 4. You must not treat your child as a messenger. 5. You must not make the children feel as though they must hide their love for their other parent. 6. You must not ask the children for information about the other parent. 7. You may not use your children as bargaining to secure better financial settlement. 8. You must make your children know they are loved by both parents.
Exposing the underreported federal tax loophole that allows corporate wrongdoers to write-off their settlement fees as ordinary business expenses, effectively shifting the burden of their misdeeds onto taxpayers.
Exposing the underreported federal tax loophole that allows corporate wrongdoers to write-off their settlement fees as ordinary business expenses, effectively shifting the burden of their misdeeds onto taxpayers.
Exposing the underreported federal tax loophole that allows corporate wrongdoers to write-off their settlement fees as ordinary business expenses, effectively shifting the burden of their misdeeds onto taxpayers.
13 Do's and Don't to Protect Child Custody and VisitationGoldberg Jones
Child custody and visitation battles are the most harrowing parts of divorce. It's important to take steps to protect your rights as a parent, and here are some tips to do just that.
How would you cope if your son decided to come out and reveal he was gay? Would you welcome him with open arms, hugs, and kisses while telling him how much you love him and support him? Or would you find yourself in an emotional tailspin, where you cry, are upset, angry, or completely confused by his revelation?
Induction Slideshow Privacy And ConfidentialityD S
A slideshow intended for new youthworkers, as part of their induction. Gives basic information for anyone working with young people, so they are aware of their employers' expectations
Suspecting infidelity – dealing with suspected infidelity insolomon okere
Suspecting infidelity is a common relationship problem experienced by anybody in a love relationship. when dealing with suspected infidelity, one must be very careful not to destroy their flourishing intimate relationship. if you are dealing with suspected infidelity in your relationship, the steps discussed in this book will serve as a guide to help you. Stop suspecting infidelity in your relationship, deal with it.
Getting Ready for Marriage - A 7 Day Reading Plan - By Jim Burns and Doug FieldsDavid_C_Cook
Taken from their book "Getting Ready for Marriage," join
relationship experts Jim Burns and Doug Fields as they help you start planning now for your lasting union.
Finances, in-laws, communication, forgiveness, sexual expectations,
no topic is off-limits as you and your fiancé get ready to step from engagement into a life-long covenant to each other.
This presentation contains responses to the following question: "If there was one thing you wish your mother would have told you about sex and sexuality, what would ot have been?" I hope these responses add to the dialogue on parent-child communication around sex and sexuality. Enjoy!
There are 8 commitments you must make to protect your children during and after your divorce. 1. You must not fight with the other parent within hearing or sight of the children. 2. You must not say anything bad about the other parent to your child. 3. You must not confide your troubles to your children. 4. You must not treat your child as a messenger. 5. You must not make the children feel as though they must hide their love for their other parent. 6. You must not ask the children for information about the other parent. 7. You may not use your children as bargaining to secure better financial settlement. 8. You must make your children know they are loved by both parents.
Exposing the underreported federal tax loophole that allows corporate wrongdoers to write-off their settlement fees as ordinary business expenses, effectively shifting the burden of their misdeeds onto taxpayers.
Exposing the underreported federal tax loophole that allows corporate wrongdoers to write-off their settlement fees as ordinary business expenses, effectively shifting the burden of their misdeeds onto taxpayers.
Exposing the underreported federal tax loophole that allows corporate wrongdoers to write-off their settlement fees as ordinary business expenses, effectively shifting the burden of their misdeeds onto taxpayers.
13 Do's and Don't to Protect Child Custody and VisitationGoldberg Jones
Child custody and visitation battles are the most harrowing parts of divorce. It's important to take steps to protect your rights as a parent, and here are some tips to do just that.
How would you cope if your son decided to come out and reveal he was gay? Would you welcome him with open arms, hugs, and kisses while telling him how much you love him and support him? Or would you find yourself in an emotional tailspin, where you cry, are upset, angry, or completely confused by his revelation?
Divorce is never enjoyable, especially if you have to deal with a quarrelsome spouse. If you and your former spouse can’t agree on important divorce aspects such as child custody, contact a Fort Lauderdale child custody attorney Gustavo E. Frances at The Law Office Of Gustavo E. Frances, P.A. They can help you demonstrate the judge that you are a responsible parent, involved in raising your children, therefore you should have the same custody rights as your former spouse.
Abused women : 10 tips on how to get out of an abusive relationship | domesti...Hilary Overcash
Has your relationship deteriorated into domestic violence, or an emotionally abusive situation? Are you afraid, doubting your own capabilities, or even your sanity?
The first step in understanding how to deal with conflict is to realize that in order to resolve conflict, you'll have to understand the other side's interests.
The expenses for caring for children continue to rise, and that doesn’t make it any easier for divorced parents. Each it attempting to keep their own household going. At the same time they often try to share expenses for their children. One of the parents should have both medical and dental coverage on the children. This may be court ordered or due to a mutual agreement between the parents.
Routine check ups at both the doctor’s office and the dentist are essential for your children. The cost of this type of preventative care out of pocket is very high. If one of your children should have an emergency for either place it can be a bill you have to pay for a very long time.
It is the responsibility of both parents to pay for such care that their children need. Have a plan of action so that it won’t be a problem later on. For example if one of you is paying for the premium on the insurance then the other parent should pay for the co-pays and deductibles. Discuss the care that is needed before it is done so that both parents agree to go forward with it.
Childcare is another expense that can add up when a divorce takes place. Perhaps one of the parents was the caregiver and now both are in the workforce. The parents should decide on a childcare provide together. It may be a licensed facility, a nanny, or even a family member. The cost of childcare should be second to the quality of care that your children are receiving though.
Sexual assault and Rape information for parents! Learn about the statistics and tips for helping you respond if your child tells you they have been a victim of rape.
4 peer responses due in 24 hours Each set of 2 responses wil.docxBHANU281672
4 peer responses due in 24 hours
Each set of 2 responses will have its own instructions.
Guided Response:
Respond to at least two of your peers. Give your peers at least one additional strategy to use when dealing with parents. Explain if you agree or disagree with your peers’ opinions regarding the family’s responsibility for the behavior. Please remember to be respectful when disagreeing with an opinion.
BRITTNEY’S POST:
How will you prepare for a meeting with a family when a challenging behavior occurs?
I will prepare for a meeting with a family when a challenging behavior occurs by first contacting them and notifying them of the behavior as well as sending a note home with dates and times of availability. I would then get all my notes together about the child in questions behavior and if I do not currently have any notes already typed up I will then start making a list of all of the challenging behaviors this child exhibits. I would have some strategies prepared as well of how to correct these behaviors, but I would of course ask the parents if they have any input on specific strategies and/or discipline that they would like me to use.
List three strategies you will use when meeting with a family to discuss their child’s behavior.
· Be a straight shooter: I would just tell the parents out right the type of behavior that they are exhibiting. It is better to get straight to the point rather than beating around the bush about their child’s behavioral problems.
· Explain how you are handling the behavior: This also goes with being s straight shooter because you need to let the parents know how you are planning to correct the behavioral problems while they are in your care. I would also make it clear that you are open to any and all suggestions they may have.
· Be friendly: This is probably one of the most important strategies in my opinion because you need to let the parents know that you are there to help their child. When you are friendly to a student’s parents it will most likely make them more comfortable in your ability to correct their child’s troubling behavior.
Examine your own attitude and discuss whether or not you think families are responsible for how their child behaves at school. Support your stance.
I believe that a parent could be responsible for how their child behaves at school, but I also believe that the parent could have nothing to do with how their child behaves when they are not around. I am a firm believer in it all depends on the situation. The reason for the child’s behavior could be because of the way their parent treats them or it could be another child at school.
What data and records will you bring into the discussion to help move the conversation forward in a positive direction?
I would bring any and all data and records regarding the child’s behavior into the discussion. I would then discuss a few options on how I plan to correct their child’s behavior as well a.
Talking to children about their adoptionJudith Bell
As an adoptive parent, you need to be prepared to talk to your child about their adoption. As children grow up and become more aware of the fact that they are adopted, they will begin to have questions that will need to be answered.
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Leaving a Cluster B: Beginning Custody Proceedings
I am so sorry you are about to start such a necessary but painful change, made more painful
if your soon to be ex is a Cluster B personality disorder. In leaving it is often best to frame
the situation in terms of what is the safest way to leave a domestic violence situation. The
emotional abuse of a narcissist is domestic violence whether any physical abuse has
occurred. Some DV shelters understand this, others do not. I would suggest talking with a
good DV agency to help you develop a safety plan for you and the children to leave and then
following that plan. Most DV agencies will tell you to gather important records (Birth and
marriage certificates, taxes, bank records, credit card statements, employment histories,
military records, insurance cards, etc). OMB members also suggest that you open your own
checking account, get your own PO Box and a new email account with new password. If you
can afford a new phone with new password do that too.
Sometimes attorneys recommend you not leave family home and to share with Cluster B
until first court hearing. They advise this based on legal strategy but it is also based in not
understanding the volatility and dangerousness of a Cluster B. I would not wait for custody
to be determined before I went to a different in-state residence (or figure out a legal way to
evict Cluster B from shared home) for two reasons: high chance you will be court ordered
to continue sharing home if you are living there when you file and if Cluster B has impulse
control issues you and the children will be at highest risk of harm when s/he realizes you
want divorce, want custody, and are leaving. You may be able to time filing concurrent with
leaving, just don't let it predate it enough s/he will get served before you and children are
in a safe place.
Assume you are being secretly recorded, that you may have a GPS tracker on your vehicle,
that your phone has spyware, and that your computer has key logging spyware. Always
have your behaviors above reproach, do not get provoked and scream, cry, throw fits, curse
etc. Many parents have lost custody of their children being set up by Cluster B and captured
acting furious or out of control in a recording. Assume every letter, text, email you send will
be read by a judge and write nothing you would not want admitted as evidence in court.
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Never write anything reflecting badly on you or that can be viewed as you wanting to keep
child from relationship from cluster B parent. For example if cluster B is substance abusing
write something like, "it is my hope that you will take active rehab and therapy steps to
stop your substance abuse, recover, and be the safe, trustworthy parent our daughter
deserves." Never waste words explaining, justifying, rationalizing, defending your actions
or feelings to a Cluster B. Be very brief and concrete in your communications. Learn about
boundaries, the grey rock technique, and implement. Use Talking Parents (TP) (a free
service) or Our Family Wizard (OFW) (a paid service) for all communications about child
and keep calendar there. Court can view these communications (emails, etc.) and ex cannot
claim lack of receipt as it is documented when sent, when seen, etc. Stop voice
communication as much as possible, keep texting only for drop off or pick up
communication. Do not use regular email. Limit all correspondence to TP or OFW.
In the early phase of separating, emotions can run high. Swallow them, talk to friends,
family, DV staff, your therapist but leave the Cluster B out of it. They will use it against you
in more ways than you can understand so early in process. Just because something is true
does not mean it needs to be said. Less said the better to protect you and kids and to not
provide ammunition to Cluster B to twist in court and with family and friends. Cluster Bs
recruit "flying monkeys" to spy on you. Make sure you do not share information with
untrustworthy "friends."
Remember it is a waste of time to be hurt, disappointed, or angry with a Cluster B because
they do not act normal. They are not normal. We need to expect them to do the Cluster B
behaviors and not be shocked, enraged, etc when those behaviors negatively affect us and
the children; your job is to become better at minimizing unnecessary triggering them,
anticipating their disordered behaviors, and protecting the children while looking like fit,
mature parent to the court. Later your job will be to model boundary management to your
children, helping them learn to do the same with their Cluster B parent. Do not pretend to
child that their Cluster B parent's abusive behaviors toward them are normal, based in love
etc. You do not want to talk badly about their other parent but you have to help them
understand that the lack of healthy parental attention and care is not because the child is
unlovable or deserves to be abused. Having their own therapist helps as does reading the
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“Bucket Books" (“Have You Filled a Bucket Today?”) to children 3-9 years old) or
participating in DV support groups. The Bucket Books gives you and child shared language
to talk about mean behaviors that empties buckets, empathy, boundaries etc. DV groups
will help them recognize manipulative attempts to dominate and control.
Join our Facebook group, “One Moms Battle” to educate yourself about Cluster B and find
support from both men and women who understand, check out our recommended reading
list and dive in. Education is power in this fight. Find your own therapist or DV support
group; it is likely the children may need the same, even baby at 2-3 can start play therapy
giving an independent third party who can attest to court behavioral changes if they
happen when little one has unsupervised parenting time with Cluster B
Ask DV staff for best lawyer recommendations. You want one who understands the power
and control issues associated with DV and Cluster B disorders, who is not scared in high
conflict divorces, and who will not encourage you to place child at risk by negotiating with
a narcissistic to look reasonable to judge. You are the voice and protector for your child.
Even if you cannot afford an attorney go for initial consultation to the "best ones". These
are generally free and you talking with them makes it a conflict of interest for them to
accept your ex. You will need a parenting plan that has every contingency spelled out, no
ambiguous language, and consequences for violations.
If you can document proof of abuse or illegal drug use or other illegal actions, carefully do
it. See if your state is a one party consent state. If it is, secretly tape Cluster B being verbally
abusive or controlling to you and or the children. Take pictures of drug stash, etc. Be ready
to prove to CPS that once you realized the extent of drug use you took the children and left
or removed abuser from your home so you are not charged with child endangerment by
staying. Expect filing of false abuse or neglect charges against you by the Cluster B and
flying monkeys.
Best wishes. This is a very stressful period in life. Stay safe. Once you leave never be alone
with Cluster B again. Implement security measures at new place. Cluster B people do not
like to lose or be exposed.
Rebecca
Board Vice President, One Mom’s Battle