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Personal Resilience TrainingPersonal Resilience Training
(How to Bounce not Break)(How to Bounce not Break)
(How to Bounce not Break)(How to Bounce not Break)
(How to Bounce not Break)(How to Bounce not Break)
With Mark Walsh
House KeepingHouse Keeping
PromisePromise
By the end of today you will have
improved resilience
If you practice and review the work
for 3 months you’ll have greatly
improved resilience
Why Bother?Why Bother?
“AAAAAAhhhhhhhh”
your aims for todayyour aims for today
• be specific
• “by 5pm I...”
• link to what matters to you
LearningLearning
(It’s not school)
This usually helps:This usually helps:
Be open
Be focussed
Be curious and have fun
Make practical and applicable to you
(ask questions)
StrengthStrength
is...?is...?
What makesWhat makes
peoplepeople
resilient is...resilient is...
A time when I was resilientA time when I was resilient
was...was...
Definitions?Definitions?
Resilience is...
- Bouncing back from pressure, stress and adversity
- Grace under fire
- Blossoming in the desert
Stress FactsStress Facts
Stress is the leading cause of work absence
Costs a silly amount - UK £26 billion annually (£1035 per person
Stress is the joint leading factor in divorces (Bodenmann, et al.,
2007).
The main killers in the West are stress related
Physical ResponsePhysical Response
Stress ResponseStress Response
Coping Mechanisms
Thinking
Trigger (Neutral)
Integral Resilience ModelIntegral Resilience Model
- Psychology
how I think
- The Body
- Behaviour
how I react
- Communication
- Social support
- Culture
how we interact
- Organisational
systems and
procedures
what we have in
place
Stress CurveStress Curve
Boredom Burnout
““Natural Hardiness”Natural Hardiness”
Some Work Stress FactorsSome Work Stress Factors
•Role Clarity
•Job Demands
•Control
•Change Management
•Support
•Relationships (e.g conflict and bullying)
Physical Well-Being FoundationPhysical Well-Being Foundation
The basic factors consistently shown to affect well-being are:
∀
Diet and water intake
∀
Exercise
∀
Sleep and rest
∀
Play/ recreation
∀
Touch
∀
Environment
•Aware
•Balanced
•Centre-Line Relaxed
+ Connected(to what you care about and to other people)
+ Definitely Energised
ABC Centring Practice
BreakBreak
Current and Past ChallengeCurrent and Past Challenge
Resilient ThinkingResilient Thinking
cceptance of what can’t be changed
reative problem solving of what can be
n internal “locus of control”- not being a victim
exibility
ealistic optimism
aintaining reality-based self-esteem
anaging (but not repressing) emotions
anaging conflict
umour
Growth vs Fixed MindsetGrowth vs Fixed Mindset
Locus of ControlLocus of Control
• Am I a victim?
• What can I do?
Thinking ErrorsThinking Errors
Black and White Thinking (All or Nothing Thinking)
Overgeneralisation
Catastrophising
Personalisation and Blame
Labelling
Mind Reading / Fortune Telling
Emotional Reasoning
Discounting the Positive
What ifs
Egocentric Thinking
Being Right Certainty
Control Error
Fairness Error
Heaven's Reward Thinking
Unrealistic Comparisons
Mind your thoughts...Mind your thoughts...
Activating event
Belief
Consequence
Images too
Cognitive Reframing
For any stress inducing thought ask yourself:
∀
Is it really true?
∀
Is it useful?
Imagery and Self-TalkImagery and Self-Talk
CommunicationCommunication
Observations, Feelings,Observations, Feelings,
Needs & RequestsNeeds & Requests
vs Judgement, Blamevs Judgement, Blame
& Demands& Demands
EIEI
EmpathyEmpathy
- The intention to connect in the
present moment
Not sympathy, story telling, consoling, one-upping, data-
gathering or problem solving
Saying no and asking forSaying no and asking for
helphelp
LunchLunch
Physical predispositions for action (long-term moods)
Invisible...to youInvisible...to you
...Very obvious to everyone else...Very obvious to everyone else
...Very obvious to everyone else...Very obvious to everyone else
A Dispositions MapA Dispositions Map
Resentment /Frustration (Can’t
Change ...Want to Change) 
Action/Ambition (Can Change
...Want to Change )
Acceptance/Peace (Can’t
Change  ...Don’t Want to
Change )
Resignation/ Apathy (Can Change
...Don’t Want to Change )
NetworksNetworks
Group Culture and ConflictGroup Culture and Conflict
ModellingModelling
Feedback?Feedback?
Play, Lightness &Play, Lightness &
your sanityyour sanity
your productivityyour productivity
your trustworthinessyour trustworthiness
your trustworthinessyour trustworthiness
your trustworthinessyour trustworthiness
your trustworthinessyour trustworthiness
+ order creates space for creativity
Where’s your crumpleWhere’s your crumple
zone?zone?
DecontaminatingDecontaminating
Planning is good ESPECIALLY when stuff
happens.
Why your best excuse for not planning?
Why your best excuse for not planning?
Why your best excuse for not planning?
Switching OffSwitching Off
Depends upon reliable lists and systems
Careful of stimulants, chemical and electronic - have
good work systems and “e-hygiene”
Centring, mindfulness and exercise
Happiness - QuizHappiness - Quiz
• Social Support and relationships
• Meaningful work
• Sleep
• Exercise
• Altruism
• Nature
• Mindfulness
• Touch
• Not commuting/ not working nights
• Gratitude and forgiveness
• Small wealth differences
• Using Virtues/ Strengths
• Autonomy
• Flow states
Self EsteemSelf Esteem
BreakBreak
Resilience QuotesResilience Quotes
Dryness promotes the formation of flower buds...flowering is, after all, not an aesthetic contribution,
but a survival mechanism - Ann Haymond Zwinger
If you learn something from a defeat it isn`t a loss - Autumn worcester
"Only to the extent that we expose ourselves over and over to annihilation can that which is
indestructible in us be found." - Pema Chodron
Successful people are prepared to fail more, and they are more persistent than others. - euglena
The bend in the road is not the end of the road unless you refuse to take the turn. - Unknown
Humor prevents one from becoming a tragic figure even though he / she is involved in tragic events.
- E. T. Eberhart
I haven't failed. I've identified 10,000 ways this doesn’t work. - Thomas Edison
StrengthsStrengths
- using them makes us happy- using them makes us happy
- using them makes us happy- using them makes us happy
Mindfulness
PromisePromise
By the end of today you will have
improved resilience
If you practice and review the work
you’ll have greatly improved
resilience
What are you goingWhat are you going
to do about it?to do about it?
to do about it?to do about it?
- Diarise notes review
- E-mail reminders
- Make a committed plan
Autobiography in Five Chapters
By Portia Nelson
Chapter I
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost... I am helpless.
It isn't my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.
Chapter II
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don't see it.
I fall in again.
I can't believe I'm in the same place, but it isn't
my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.
Chapter III
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in...it's a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.
Chapter IV
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.
Chapter V
I walk down another street.

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  • 1. Personal Resilience TrainingPersonal Resilience Training (How to Bounce not Break)(How to Bounce not Break) (How to Bounce not Break)(How to Bounce not Break) (How to Bounce not Break)(How to Bounce not Break) With Mark Walsh
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  • 28. PromisePromise By the end of today you will have improved resilience If you practice and review the work for 3 months you’ll have greatly improved resilience
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  • 32. your aims for todayyour aims for today • be specific • “by 5pm I...” • link to what matters to you
  • 34. This usually helps:This usually helps: Be open Be focussed Be curious and have fun Make practical and applicable to you (ask questions)
  • 36. What makesWhat makes peoplepeople resilient is...resilient is... A time when I was resilientA time when I was resilient was...was...
  • 37. Definitions?Definitions? Resilience is... - Bouncing back from pressure, stress and adversity - Grace under fire - Blossoming in the desert
  • 38. Stress FactsStress Facts Stress is the leading cause of work absence Costs a silly amount - UK £26 billion annually (£1035 per person Stress is the joint leading factor in divorces (Bodenmann, et al., 2007). The main killers in the West are stress related
  • 39. Physical ResponsePhysical Response Stress ResponseStress Response Coping Mechanisms Thinking Trigger (Neutral)
  • 40. Integral Resilience ModelIntegral Resilience Model - Psychology how I think - The Body - Behaviour how I react - Communication - Social support - Culture how we interact - Organisational systems and procedures what we have in place
  • 43. Some Work Stress FactorsSome Work Stress Factors •Role Clarity •Job Demands •Control •Change Management •Support •Relationships (e.g conflict and bullying)
  • 44. Physical Well-Being FoundationPhysical Well-Being Foundation The basic factors consistently shown to affect well-being are: ∀ Diet and water intake ∀ Exercise ∀ Sleep and rest ∀ Play/ recreation ∀ Touch ∀ Environment
  • 45. •Aware •Balanced •Centre-Line Relaxed + Connected(to what you care about and to other people) + Definitely Energised ABC Centring Practice
  • 47. Current and Past ChallengeCurrent and Past Challenge
  • 48. Resilient ThinkingResilient Thinking cceptance of what can’t be changed reative problem solving of what can be n internal “locus of control”- not being a victim exibility ealistic optimism aintaining reality-based self-esteem anaging (but not repressing) emotions anaging conflict umour
  • 49. Growth vs Fixed MindsetGrowth vs Fixed Mindset
  • 50. Locus of ControlLocus of Control • Am I a victim? • What can I do?
  • 51. Thinking ErrorsThinking Errors Black and White Thinking (All or Nothing Thinking) Overgeneralisation Catastrophising Personalisation and Blame Labelling Mind Reading / Fortune Telling Emotional Reasoning Discounting the Positive What ifs Egocentric Thinking Being Right Certainty Control Error Fairness Error Heaven's Reward Thinking Unrealistic Comparisons
  • 52. Mind your thoughts...Mind your thoughts... Activating event Belief Consequence Images too
  • 53. Cognitive Reframing For any stress inducing thought ask yourself: ∀ Is it really true? ∀ Is it useful?
  • 56. Observations, Feelings,Observations, Feelings, Needs & RequestsNeeds & Requests vs Judgement, Blamevs Judgement, Blame & Demands& Demands
  • 57. EIEI
  • 58. EmpathyEmpathy - The intention to connect in the present moment Not sympathy, story telling, consoling, one-upping, data- gathering or problem solving
  • 59. Saying no and asking forSaying no and asking for helphelp
  • 61. Physical predispositions for action (long-term moods)
  • 62. Invisible...to youInvisible...to you ...Very obvious to everyone else...Very obvious to everyone else ...Very obvious to everyone else...Very obvious to everyone else
  • 63. A Dispositions MapA Dispositions Map Resentment /Frustration (Can’t Change ...Want to Change)  Action/Ambition (Can Change ...Want to Change ) Acceptance/Peace (Can’t Change  ...Don’t Want to Change ) Resignation/ Apathy (Can Change ...Don’t Want to Change )
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  • 66. Group Culture and ConflictGroup Culture and Conflict
  • 69. Play, Lightness &Play, Lightness &
  • 70. your sanityyour sanity your productivityyour productivity your trustworthinessyour trustworthiness your trustworthinessyour trustworthiness your trustworthinessyour trustworthiness your trustworthinessyour trustworthiness + order creates space for creativity
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  • 72. Where’s your crumpleWhere’s your crumple zone?zone?
  • 74. Planning is good ESPECIALLY when stuff happens. Why your best excuse for not planning? Why your best excuse for not planning? Why your best excuse for not planning?
  • 75. Switching OffSwitching Off Depends upon reliable lists and systems Careful of stimulants, chemical and electronic - have good work systems and “e-hygiene” Centring, mindfulness and exercise
  • 76. Happiness - QuizHappiness - Quiz • Social Support and relationships • Meaningful work • Sleep • Exercise • Altruism • Nature • Mindfulness • Touch • Not commuting/ not working nights • Gratitude and forgiveness • Small wealth differences • Using Virtues/ Strengths • Autonomy • Flow states
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  • 80. Resilience QuotesResilience Quotes Dryness promotes the formation of flower buds...flowering is, after all, not an aesthetic contribution, but a survival mechanism - Ann Haymond Zwinger If you learn something from a defeat it isn`t a loss - Autumn worcester "Only to the extent that we expose ourselves over and over to annihilation can that which is indestructible in us be found." - Pema Chodron Successful people are prepared to fail more, and they are more persistent than others. - euglena The bend in the road is not the end of the road unless you refuse to take the turn. - Unknown Humor prevents one from becoming a tragic figure even though he / she is involved in tragic events. - E. T. Eberhart I haven't failed. I've identified 10,000 ways this doesn’t work. - Thomas Edison
  • 81. StrengthsStrengths - using them makes us happy- using them makes us happy - using them makes us happy- using them makes us happy
  • 83. PromisePromise By the end of today you will have improved resilience If you practice and review the work you’ll have greatly improved resilience
  • 84. What are you goingWhat are you going to do about it?to do about it? to do about it?to do about it? - Diarise notes review - E-mail reminders - Make a committed plan
  • 85. Autobiography in Five Chapters By Portia Nelson Chapter I I walk down the street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I fall in. I am lost... I am helpless. It isn't my fault. It takes forever to find a way out. Chapter II I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I pretend I don't see it. I fall in again. I can't believe I'm in the same place, but it isn't my fault. It still takes a long time to get out. Chapter III I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I see it is there. I still fall in...it's a habit. My eyes are open. I know where I am. It is my fault. I get out immediately. Chapter IV I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I walk around it. Chapter V I walk down another street.