Short suggestions that may help us communicate better.

1. Responding To Pain
Yours and Others’

2. What to Say
Be silent, be close and await for them to talk. “I wanted to come here just be with you”
“I wish I had something to say that would help/take away the pain, but I don’t. But I am here
for you.”
“You look well today/good, but how are you feeling?” “How Are you holding up?”
“I am going to be going to the store. Can I get you something?”
“I can’t imagine how hard this is for you, but you seem to be handling it well and I think you
are so strong.”
“You’ve got so much on your plate, yet you’re still cheerful. How do you do it?”
“You are in my thoughts and prayers” “This must be so difficult for you, I can’t imagine.”
“I hope that you feel as well as possible.” “I love you.” “I care about you.” “I am praying for
you.”

3. What to Say
“How are you doing? Do you want to talk about it, or would you rather
not?”
“What can I do for you to make you feel better? Now, tomorrow or next
week? What’s the hardest for you? Which chores are difficult for you?”
“I miss you, I hate that we cannot do the things together that we used to
do. Maybe the two of us can think about something different we can do”.
“I can hardly imagine how it is having to live with pain every day. Can you
explain to me what it means to you?”
“If you want to cry, my shoulder is always available. Maybe it’ll be a relief
to you.”

4. What NOT to Say
"I understand.” or “Oh yes, I've been through this many times
myself. Here's what worked for me.”
Well, I’m also facing such and such …
“Just have more faith and you will be fine.” "It could be worse.”
"God's grace is sufficient."
"Move on," "Let it go," "Isn't it time you got over this?"