The document describes various aspects of Roman culture from the perspective of a character named Hector. Hector discusses enjoying togas, statues without flaws, flowery Corinthian columns, curved archways, and being impressed by the Pantheon building. He mentions liking the Roman poet Virgil and satires by Horace. Hector also discusses enjoying plays, learning anatomy, Ptolemy's model of the universe, dirty city streets, and remembering the phrase "all the roads" from a song. He asks to be identified as Roman in the end.

1. Helping Hector! Okay so what am I, Greek or Roman? Here are some things I like!

2. Helping Hector! I love this cool garment called a Toga! Does that help? It looks so stylish!

3. Helping Hector! Great Statue, check it out it looks like me! Look I have abs too! Come on now, what man looks that perfect. It is so unrealistic, no battle scars, no little bit of flabby stomach! I wouldn’t buy it!

4. Helping Hector! I remember seeing columns like this near my house, does this help! I really like the flowery one called the Corinthian! I know it is SOOOOO manly!!! Giggle, Giggle!

5. Helping Hector! Curved archway or round door?? It isn’t hip to be Square!! Hehe So CURVED!

6. Helping Hector! Check out this impressive building!!! I think it is called the Parthenon!

7. Wow!! Impressive!!!! The Pantheon! Curvy! Even Better! Check it out, more flowery columns! Definitely impressive!

8. Helping Hector! So which famous building do you think that I like?? The Pantheon

9. Helping Hector! I really like Homer No, no…Not that Homer, the other the blind poet guy

10. Helping Hector! You see the blind Homer influenced my favorite writer, Virgil This guy from what I remember wrote this cool poem about some dude and his travels after the Trojan war! Very heroic something like me! Well besides that I am afraid of bunny rabbits.

11. My favorite poems make fun of people and the things they do wrong, because I am of course perfect! - They are called SATIRES My second favorite type have great emotions – they are called ODOES. I am a sensitive guy some times and they bring a tear to my eye! I mean I get dust in my eyes! Helping Hector! Horace

12. Helping Hector Okay besides the fiction stories. I love non-fiction. You know the ones that talk about the history and how great we are. Only, I can’t remember if it talked about Zeus or Jupiter in the story. Livy & Tactius

13. Helping Hector I hear clapping, what could it be? Oh wow, check it out a play! I remember sitting in my seat for seven hours at a time, wiggling a lot because I had to, you know…. use the latrine. Do you know what a latrine is? So let’s see what can I remember?

14. I love to laugh at comedies & of course I love those tragedies. Come on guys, you understand what I am saying… take a girl to a sad movie and she cries on your shoulder. You are her savior! The one thing I can remember is they speak in a funny language called Latin. Supposedly, I hear this language is all the rage in Europe!

15. Helping Hector Ok Gross, with a capital “G.” I really do not need to know what the inside of my body looks like, gosh I am probably as “HOT” on the inside as I am on the outside! I do know that all these horrid pictures are parts of an Anatomy. This was taught to me when I was a young man.

16. Helping Hector Ok, so I know about anatomy but let me show you how smart I really am. Check this out. I bet you didn’t know that those things in the sky are not only stars, but they are also known as planets and we live in a universe. Too big of words for you? Tell that to your Science teacher! Here let me draw you a chart of what our universe looks like.

17. There we are in the center! Humans are so cool! My civilization of Greeks, no Roman… okay whatever are awesome smack in the middle! Something else you can tell your Science teacher, Hector the coolest man in the world, taught you! Ptolemy’s Design

18. Helping Hector Oh god this is SOOOOOOOO disgusting. I have just stepped into a heap of foul smelly brown stuff. Oh yes, you know what it is. I think I am going to be sick! Excuse me for a second! All I know is that where I am from this would never happen. My people would never allow such foul items to litter the streets. Are there no sewers or waste removal people around?

19. Helping Hector Helping Hector Okay, I have racked my brain the last thing I can remember is something about “all the roads” I have no idea, but is something I keep singing… all the roads, all the roads, all the roads.. Catchy tune! What does this mean, am I going insane?

20. Helping Hector Okay, so now what am I. Roman or Greek? You know that my many loyal lady admirers are awaiting me. I could not disappoint them! HELP!!!! I am afraid (wimper wimper), huhummmm, I mean confused or uh discouraged.

21. Helping Hector I am the world’s coolest: Roman