This document summarizes the author's experience with her first roommate in college. Initially, the author and her roommate Lynzee had many differences and conflicts over cleanliness and food smells. However, the author made continuous efforts to understand Lynzee's perspective and share her Korean culture, such as inviting Lynzee to try noodles. Over time, their relationship improved as they educated each other about their cultures. By the end of the year, Lynzee thanked the author for changing her view that Asians were unfriendly, and the author felt proud to be an ambassador for her culture. The author learned that making an effort to understand others can overcome initial reactions and judgments.

1. Michelle Hahm
CP English 12
Ms.Lehmann
04/28/2011
The heart of a friend
We were like Tom and Jerry. We had nothing in common and never tried to understand
each other. I was just about to eat my noodles in my room when I heard,
“Could you stop eating those noodles in our room? That smell makes me throw up. Thanks.”
I always heard my roommate is complaining about the smells of my food, even though I did
not even eat a bit. But I apologized about the smell again. Why could she not try to understand
me, at least? When she was eating food in our room, I did not complain to her, even though that
smell makes me throw up, too. Like this, we never tried to understand because no matter what
happens, I thought I am always right and she thought she is right.
That was the start of the war with my roommate.
Lynzee was the first roommate that I ever had. When we introduced ourselves, she said
that she was happy to have an Asian roommate; she was excited about learning new culture.
I felt exactly same what she thought and it was good sign to me about starting my „American
dream‟. However, after a week, our differences became obvious. She never cleaned her side of
the room and always talked on the phone at night as I tried to sleep. I tried to be nice to her, so I
bought earphones, and suggested that make a plan for cleaning the room together on the
weekends.
In spite of my efforts, Lynzee remained unfriendly. Sometimes I ate noodles in my

2. room with my friends. Whenever I brought noodles into our room, she always glared at us and
made rude remarks about the smell. I wanted to find the way to open Lynzee to my culture, so I
tired to think of ways to solve our conflict and become friends. One day, as I was eating, I
noticed Lynzee watching me again. I was about to leave my room because I thought she was
mad again.
“Do you want to try a bite of my noodles?” I asked. I even surprised myself with that effort.
Because I did not think that she would try the food that she hates. But she said,
“Hum...Actually yes, please? I just want to take adventure.”
I waited for her reaction as she chewed and swallowed the noodles. I prepared myself for
the worst.
“Michelle, this is so good. Can I have another bite?” she said.
That set me on a plan of action.
I took her to a Korean restaurant to teach her how to use chopsticks. I also told the unique
stories about my country. Then I taught her some easy Korean words that she could make short
conversation with other Koreans. She never missed an opportunity to use them. At that point,
she taught me about American life and culture. It helped me a lot to get use live in other country.
Times goes by, end the of the school year came to us, Lynzee thanked me when we were
leaving. She said that I had changed her way of thinking. She said,
“I thought Asians were not friendly and were selfish. But I am sorry. It was all my
misunderstanding.” I felt like I had become an ambassador for all Asians.
If, my roommate did not change even though I tried that hard, I would not care about
her, neither. But she respected and listen me what I asked her. That impressed me a lot; you
cannot even imagine how I felt.

3. I have learned from this that we should not to judge people by their first reaction only. I have
developed patience to understand their actions before I react. I used to give up early when I felt
that it is impossible to achieve. Also, I did not believe that Lynzee would know that my effort
and hopes. But in fact, everybody will know about the true fact, effort, and love.
No matter what, the effort you put in, that effort will not ignore you and they always have the
truth heart to all the people.