Michael Mamas discusses conflicts -- what they are, how to traverse them, and how to resolve them. Learn more at michaelmamas.net

1. Conflict Resolution

2. Deep within you, there is a stable solid place.
When in conflict,
take the time to find that place and settle into it.

3. By finding the stable place inside,
the turmoil of the conflict ceases to overtake you.
You then ‘stay out of the weeds’
instead of perpetuating the conflict.

4. When in conflict,
strive to ‘take the high road.’
Be your inner adult.

5. Usually in a conflict,
both parties consider themselves to be right, well intended,
and just trying to help.
Both consider the other person to be wrong, misguided,
and in need of being corrected.
Broader vision, self-honesty, and understanding
the other’s perspective are essential,
but not so easy to do.

6. When you find yourself in conflict, take a step back.
That might involve saying,
“I need some time and space right now.
I think it would do us both some good.
We can talk later.”

7. When in conflict,
ask yourself if you are an abuser, being abused, or both.
Abusers often consider themselves abused.
Self-honesty and basic respect are essential.

8. No one owes anyone else the right to abuse them.
Don’t allow it.
When in an abusive situation, get away.

9. In conflicts,
attempt to find a time, a place, and a way
to talk it out.
Talking it out does not mean venting.
If the attempt doesn’t work,
let it go, and try again later.

10. The goal of conflict resolution is to forgive, but not to forget.
Forgiving is compassionate; forgetting is denial.
Healthy relationships are based in understanding,
not denial.

11. Healthy relationships,
in some cases,
require staying away from the other person.

12. Look Deeper
Live Better
with
Dr. Michael Mamas
www.MichaelMamas.net