The document discusses the importance of family and honoring one's parents. It notes that family is the source of our identity and values and the basic unit of society. However, modern issues like poverty, selfishness, and generational gaps threaten family relationships. The Christian view sees family as a domestic church and reflection of God's love. The Fourth Commandment mandates honoring parents so that one may live long in the land, and this includes caring for them in old age. Strengthening family requires listening, spending time together, and expressing love and forgiveness.

1. THE FAMILY
• We all belong in family.
• Who we are and what we are can
be traced back to our family.
• We are all the product of the
kind of relationships we have in
the family.

2. •It is not the source only of our
material needs and emotional
support. Most of all it is the source
of most of our fundamental values.
We can rightly call therefore the
family as the cradle of all other
values. (e.g. reverence for life,
honesty justice – are all first
learned in the family.)

3. But today the family is under
attack: marital infidelities,
broken marriages, parental
abuse, widening gap between
parents and children etc.
These problems threaten not
only family relationships but
also community relationships.

4. WHAT IS A FAMILY?
It is a community of persons, composed
of a father and a mother united in
marriage, together with their children
In a family, procreation (openness) and
education of children are implicit.
Love is also implied

5. CONDITIONS BESETTING THE
FILIPINO FAMILY
At the core of our being is our family – what
we are and who we are, we owe them all
from the family. Through it we find our
security, strength and support
On account of this, we become loyal to our
family (members) and committed to the
good of it.
But the Filipino Family is under attack!

6. 1. the pressure to attain
economic security
Due to poverty and low income, many
parents are forced to seek employment
abroad. As a result, children are left to
the care of their relatives.
Unfortunately, some parents work
abroad not because of poverty or low
income but to seek greater comforts in
life.

7. The loving and caring
presence of the parents
especially in the early
development of their children
cannot be compensated by
any material gain.

8. Parents remain as integral
parts of their children’s
growth. This problem has led
to the undermining of the
traditional family values of
solidarity, fidelity and self
sacrifice.

9. 2. The mindset of seeing relationships
primarily as an exchange of goods, i.e
“what I can get out of this
relationship.” . . . very selfish.
If uncontrolled, this attitude or mentality
can affect even marriage. It means that
marriage is motivated or seen as
something that can given me pleasure.
Responsibility and self-sacrifice in
marriage are lost.

10. As a result we have problems in
relationships like: marital
infidelities, broken homes . . .
Pope John Paul II (Familiaris Consortio)
reminds us every family is
summoned by God to live out its
mission: to become a community of
life and love.

11. CHRISTIAN VIEW OF THE FAMILY
1. It is a covenant relationship
Normally, the expression of selfless
concern and love is very common in a
family. But why? This force is what
we call love. But what is love?

12. We are created out of God’s love,
because of this the love that exists
within the family is just a mirror or
reflection of God who created us out of
love.
This love in the family is made more
lucid through genuine commitment
and self sacrifice of every member of
the family (to work, to cook etc. . .)

13. This love in the family starts with the
love and fidelity between our parents,
formally expressed in the covenant of
love in the sacrament of marriage (until
death do us part – it is a pledge of
everlasting fidelity). (cf. God’s covenant with
Abraham, Israel and in the Incarnation of Jesus)
Note: just as God’s covenant –love brings
fullness of life to Israel, so the covenant-
love of our parents allows us to be born,
raised, nourished and respected.

14. Marriage is not just a contract
(something agreed – to take and
give). It is a sacrament. Jesus is
present in it. Therefore it is our
duty to defend marriage against
anything that would threaten it.
(e.g. divorce etc…)

15. 2. Domestic Church
In the bible, Jesus is seen as the
groom of the Church.
The love that exists (respect, care)
between the spouses and in the
family is a sharing in the love of the
Christ to the Church.
It becomes a symbol of Christ’s love.

16. Therefore, since the family is the
foundation of the Church (where love
is first experienced and God taught
and values caught), we can rightly call
the family as a “domestic Church.”
Since it is the domestic church, life
must be welcomed and nourished. It is
through the family that we all first
experience God.

17. 3. The First and Vital Cell of Society
The family is the most basic
community in the society. This
implies that the family is the
necessary unit where citizens are
born and raised.
Thus it is the vial cell of the society
where citizens are nurtured and
trained to become good and
productive members of the society.

18. Through the family the children
(citizens) are trained to respect people
in authority and follow rules and
regulations, to be diligent and
persevering.
Thus a Catholic family can greatly
contribute for the betterment of the
society or nation.

19. THE FOURTH COMMANDMENT
“HONOR YOUR FATHER AND YOUR
MOTHER, SO THAT YOUR DAYS MAY
BE LONG IN THE LAND THE LORD
YOUR GOD IS GIVING YOU.” (Ex. 20:12)
“HONOR YOUR FATHER AND YOUR
MOTHER, AS THE LORD YOUR GOD
COMMANDED YOU, SO THAT YOUR
DAYS MAY BE LONG AND THAT IT
MAY GO WELL WITH YOU IN THE
LAND THAT THE LORD YOUR GOD IS
GIVING YOU.” (Dt. 5:16)

20. FOR THE ISRAELITES:
The Hebrew word for “honor” goes
deeper than simple respect and
obedience to parents. In this
context it means “to give weight
to” or “to acknowledge the
importance of.”
This means: to take the situation of
the parents seriously and to listen to
what our aging parents have to say.

21. This presupposes that parents,
most especially when they are
old, “are not to be left in the
periphery of society, but they
are to be integrated into its
life.” We have to preserve and
learned from their wisdom and
experiences.

22. For the Israelites, to honor
includes the duty to support
the parents financially,
especially when they are old
and when they ca no longer
support themselves.

23. This commandment gives
the assurance that each
one would be sure that he/
she will be cared for when
old and thus “have a long
life in the land that
Yahweh has given…”

24. This commandment,
historically and even
now, is addressed
primarily to adults and
not to children whose
parents are aged.

25. A family can only be truly a
family if there is respect and
love in it. This reality is
enshrined in the fourth
commandment! To honor
means: to show proper
gratitude, affection, respect,
obedience and care to parents.

26. Scriptural meaning:
It links the first three commandments
(relationship with God) with the remaining
commandments (relationship with others)
Place of the 4th commandment in the
Decalogue:
1. After God . . . then parents. . .
•Love of neighbors is first planted in the
family, in relation to our parents . . .(and
so with the other values associated with it.

27. Loving our parents is not just
an obligation, it is a God-
given duty and responsibility
– it is an act of faith. Loving
them is obeying the
commandment and obeying
the commandment is loving
God.

28. This is the only
commandment that bears
a promise: “that you may
have a long life in the land
which the Lord, your God
is giving you.”

29. By honoring/respecting our parents,
the value of the family is protected.
Through the 4th commandment, we are
reminded that prosperity (long/happy
life) is achieved through genuine love
and respect for parents.
This is a concrete example of the
inseparable link between the love of
God and neighbor.

30. Obstacles to Honoring Our Parents
1. Abusive or neglectful parents (duties)
Even inflict harm: physical, emotional,
psychological; abandonment
2. may be due to natural process of growing
up- when children seem to distance
themselves from their parents – to
discover new things, friends and
relationship; they assert their
independence.

31. Obstacles to Honoring Our Parents
3. generation gap: disparity in
preferences, attitudes,
behaviors, belief between
children and parents due to
changing historical and social
conditions experienced (ex.
Music, dances, garments,
values, attitudes . . . )

32. Nevertheless, respect must
be given to them even in
terms of disagreement;
respect their authority,
listen to them and
understand them also.

33. Duty to care for the elderly
in the society
Original meaning of the 4th commandment:
to care for the aged parent (not to leave them
behind in their journey because they are
aged; instead to care for them even when
they are no longer productive; Learn from
their wisdom; they should be seen as
persons not as burdens
In our country still Ok but we have to be very
careful, especially from outside influences

34. Duty to love our brothers
and sisters:
if we love our parents, it is
only natural to love also
our brothers and sisters

35. Duties of parents:
to respect the rights and
dignity also of their children;
to be responsible for their
spiritual and moral growth
and development, not only
material needs

36. How to strengthen
family life:
Learn to listen
Do things together
Learn to say “I am sorry”
“I forgive”
Learn to say “I love you”

37. FOR US TODAY:
+ to honor our parents
is to respect their
words and obey their
commands

38. + to support our parents
finally when they are
very old is not only a
matter of obligation, it
is a God-given duty.

39. + this commandment is the first
commandment in the second
table of the Law – this implies
the priority of this
commandment over the rest of
the commandments – second to
God. (Read Sirach 3:1-16)

40. + Note:
“If our parents or lawful superiors
command us to do anything that is beyond
their legitimate authority . . . we are not
bound to obey them; and if what they
command is against God’s
commandment, `we must obey God,
rather than men.’ (Ac 5:29; 4:19)
But even then, we should respect and
honor them.”