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Adopt(Ed)
- 1. Adopt-EdRyan and Kayla North
- 4. In YOU God trusts
- 6. AVERAGE kids with SPECIAL needs
- 7. Kids with highly SPECIALIZED needs
- 8. Two of the most influential buildings in the world are CHURCHES and SCHOOLS
- 9. Labels are for THINGS not PEOPLE
- 10. EVERYONE has a STORY to tell
- 11. What is the RISK potential?
- 12. You are the CAPTAIN of team__________
- 13. Teachers are your PARTNERS so treat them well
- 14. Pediatricians are your ALLIES. Do not be afraid to leverage that alliance.
- 15. Therapists can help in many ways, both at HOME and at SCHOOL
- 16. Not EVERYONE was trained this way
- 17. Not EVERYONE was Born in the USA
- 18. Learning differences are REAL but they are not DEBILITATING
- 19. There is MORE to your child’s story than meets the EYE
- 20. We all have ISSUES some of them are just SENSORY
- 21. We all get ATTACHED some of us just have DIFFERENT styles
- 22. YOU can equip the teacher and help FUTURE students as well
- 23. You are NOT licensed to kill (unless you’re killing them with KINDNESS)
- 24. Everyone will APPROACH the teacher, you must REACH the teacher
- 25. If you could only tell their teacher ONE thing about them what would it be?
Editor's Notes
- Business Manager at Coram Deo Academy (explain educational model)10 years in private Christian educationResponsibilities include Human ResourcesType of teacher: 1) They love the Lord, 2) They love the kids, 3) They love to teachWe have many adoptees at the school.Meeting yesterday where we discussed the need to equip our teachers with strategies to deal with sensory issues.Schools are like bureaucracies – change, or in this case progress, requires consensus, cooperation and timeOne of my goals is to make Coram Deo a place where adopted kids feel safe.
- This is a cartoon representation of our family. This is the only way that we can get everyone in one pictureWe have: (list everyone by name and age.)We have2 were added by adoption 2 were added by birthOver 20 foster kids have slept in our home over the years
- ToriFirst placementFostered 3 years 1 month 5 daysOpen adoption23 week preemieMultiple surgeries Mic-Key Button10 meds a dayNG TubeFailure to thriveTwo biologicalBrooklyn “When are we going to adopt Brooklyn?”Liberty (Libby)
- WHO YOU AREYou are your child’s cheerleader. You are the person who believes in them and you are the person God has trusted with them. They are your responsibility and that responsibility is amplified by the fact that the people who they were given to at the start of their lives could not or would not care for them.You are their advocate.Advocate: a person who pleads for or in behalf of another; intercessor.We have “In God we Trust” written on our moneyGod has “I trust in you” written over your lifeChildren are a blessing form the Lord
- The two most influential buildings are schools and churchesHearts are changed in the church and minds are changed at schoolRemember that Nazis were charged with crimes against the minds of childrenEducation is their rightHelping them is your responsibilityYou are their expert on your kidsIf we don’t have changed hearts and minds we won’t have changed people and without changed people we won’t have a changed culture
- Everyone has a storyYou have to tell their story – you have to bring the teacher into that storyThe younger they are the more responsibility you have for that storyAs they get older they will share moreYou have to protect their storyBe careful not to share more than neededTeachers don’t need to know every detailNo one told us this KEY detail when we first became parentsThe children and their birth families are entitled to their privacy no matter what you think of the birth familyFoster parents are required to have this info be need to knowNot everyone needs to know the details why the child is in your homeDoctor needs to know, teacher does not
- You are the captain of your child’s teamFunctions of a captainLeaderIs trained for a purposeMakes in game decisionsEncourages othersThat person is youYou need to make the best situational decisions for your childYou have to realize that you need to be flexibleYou can’t assume that your training will fit every situation
- Your child’s doctor is a key member of your teamWe are taught as children never to question what the doctor saysMost adults never outgrow thisTori story about move stopped by doctorsFoster parents love their pediatrician – writing as needed scriptsDoctor’s note is powerfulMake your doctor your friendThey can require things for medical reasons
- Just because you were born in China does not make you an expert on Chinese affairsYou have to let the teacher know that even though your child is twelve that they cam home at 2No less American than the kid from Kansas City Japan storyBe careful how you reactBeing considerate of someone’s background or situation is not weakness –it’s kindness
- CulturalLearning DifferencesBirth FamilySensoryAttachment
- What can you really tell about someone just by looking at them?There is so much more than what is obvious.People always assume that Tyler was born into our familyHeightLooks – including skin colorPeople always assume that Tori was born somewhere else and are noticeably disappointed when the answer to “where is she from?” simply comes back as “Dallas”Surprise when they meet Kayla – “You’re Tori’s mom?!?!?”George SheaKids sometimes get labeled as poorly behaved or uncooperative with now knowledge of their pastYou protect their story and their privacy“He was drug exposed in utero and one of the consequences for him is that he has a hard time paying attention” is good“His so-called mother smoked meth all during her pregnancy and as a result he can’t focus. Honestly I don’t know what is wrong with that woman. How hard can it be to not do drugs for nine months? My friend stopped drinking coffe during her pregnancy” Is many kinds of wrong
- Knowledge is powerThere are experts do you don’t have to be oneKnowing about attachment styles can help you in the classroomSecureAvoidantAmbivalentDisorganizedAttachment influences in the classroom – TapestryYou’re not the expertDon’t try to be one Information is your friend
- Remember the goal is a partnershipDon’t disguise a dictatorship as a partnership “Were partners so do exactly as I say or I’ll be mad”Be willing to spend money Teacher should not have to fund your accommodation requestsTori bouncy ballTwo reasonsFidgetsBusy hands = settled mindsAs your suggestions bear fruit teachers will become more open to your suggestionsGain ground slowly and deliberatelySending a 10 page e-mail prior to the first day of school and every night will get the teachers walls upDon’t confront in car lineAssume that teachers want to help so help them
- Sonic FoodBe a partnerNobody likes a self proclaimed know it allEveryone will want special accommodationsYou need to get them on your sideNo naggingNo screamingThe must feel loved and encouraged Not everything is DEFCON 1 level stuffIf you can’t assign appropriate levels of importance the teacher will not trust your judgmentNo e-mails late at nightNo Facebook harassmentIf you get access to a cell phone number use that sparingly because it is privileged infoDon’t run to the principal every time you don’t get what you wantThese are not partner behaviorTeachers are generally nice people who care about kids
- Keep the main thing the main thing
- BlogLap padBouncy ballPray