This document discusses frame control and de-framing in communication. It explains that de-framing occurs when someone with a lower frame is able to take control of the conversation from the person with the higher frame. Occasionally being de-framed is normal, but being constantly de-framed shows instability. The document provides three strategies for maintaining frame control: controlling the agenda, repetition to reinforce one's position, and using social proof to show one's position has worked before.

1. Communication Q-Card: You just got De-Framed. How do you recover?
One of the inevitable traits of frame control is the fact that you can lose your dominant position at any given time by a skillful
process known as de-framing. De-framing is essentially the process by which someone who has the lower frame (by either losing
it during a frame collision or simply by shear status) is able to reposition themselves to the superior frame by taking frame
control away from the person with the higher frame.
The true benefit of frame control is the ability to maintain that dominant position for the majority of the interaction (not to be
confused with bullying!). Being constantly de-framed depicts instability and an inability to be consistent and decisive. That is not
to say that being de-framed occasionally is not normal. In fact, quite the contrary, de-framing and being de-framed is a sign of
healthy communication whereby the concerns and interests of all parties are being accounted for and addressed. This is how
true leaders communicate.
Here are 3 quick strategies to consistently maintain frame control and to regain frame control in the event that you lose it:
Agenda-Gatekeeper: it’s a fact - the person that maintains the agenda controls the outcome of any social or business interaction.
Always establish and stay on task. However, be inclusive and be ready to amend the agenda for the benefit of all.
Repetition: use repetition to reinforce your position - even if you have just changed your position based on new evidence that
has come to light. It not only shows your passion and confidence on the subject, but it also helps a point resonate in a persons
mind both from a visual and auditory perspective.
Social Proof: we love placing our trust in people that have walked the path before us. Social proof and the correct use of that
social proof is evidence that your position has worked and could work again.
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