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More ofthe blindingbloodyobviousfrom universityresearchers
Russell Grenning
Two Britishprofessorshave justspentagooddeal of time and,no doubt,a greatdeal of public
moneytocome to the conclusionthatmengive more toa charityif the fundraiserisanattractive
woman.
Can youbelieve that?Isn’tthata simplymind-bogglingrevelation? Gosh,whatnext?Anin-depth
researchprojectto determineif menof acertainage everthoughtthatMaggie Thatchercouldhave
beena sensational lingeriemodel?
The two researchersadmittedtonotknowingwhymenactuallydidthis while women,onthe other
hand,appearedtobe unaffectedbythe looksof male fundraisers.Theysuspectthatthere isa
fundamental biological differencebetweenthe sexes –at leastwhenitcomesto handingoveryour
hard-earnedtocharity – betweenmenandwomen.
Who wouldhave guessedthatthere were fundamental biological differencesbetweenthe sexes?
Thank goodnessforthistrail-blazingresearch.
I don’twant tobe thoughtof as beingan unreconstructed misogynisticoldfartbut itwas whenI
readthe tworesearcherswere women –ProfessorsSarahSmithandNicholaRaihani –that I began
to understandwhytheywere sosurprisedbythisconclusion.Nodoubt,theyare somarriedto their
workthat theirrelationshipswithmenhave notperhapsbeenasin-depthasthose of more worldly-
wise women.
I couldhave toldthemthiswouldbe the resultof theirstudybefore theyevenstarted.
I once observedachum of mine whowas legendaryforhismiserlinessmakingasizable donationto
a charity whichIactuallyknewwascompletelyalientohisgeneral political convictions.He hada bag
of tencentcoinsand was slowlydroppingthemone byone intothe donationtinof a petite little
blondwitha quite extraordinary décolletage.
He isa tallishblokeandwasstandingasclose as he couldto the buxomlasswithoutactually
stompingonherfeetwhile he droppedinthe coinsandhiseyes,peeringdown,werefixedinan
obsessive stare.Nodoubthe waslookingatthe tinand didn’twanttomissit withhisgentle rainof
coins.
Anyhow,backto the research.
What the two professorsdidwasanalyse nearly700charity fundraisingpagesfromwebsiteof the
2014 LondonMarathon. Fundraisers whouse thisplatformpresenttheirname,photoandthe
charityto receive the fundsraised.The attractivenessof the entrantswasjudgedusinga10-point
score by fourreviewersof the oppositesex.
“Fundraising pagesprovidea fascinating real-lifelaboratory forlooking atcharity donations.Now
we see thatthe responsedepends,albeitsubconsciously,on thefundraiser’sattractiveness,”
ProfessorSmithsaid.
“Albeit subconsciously”?Wordsfail me.
Nowhowabout thisstaggeringconclusion:Theybelieve thatthe mendonatingtoattractive women
“are unwittingly displaying signalsof their generosity and wealth which,in evolutionary terms,are
perceived by women asattractivefeaturesfora potentialsexualpartner.Men are moreinfluenced
by physicalattractiveness.”
I am amazed,justamazed,because thismeansthatblokesgoforyoungsexybirdsratherthanplain
oldsheilas.The goodprofessorsshoulddosome follow-upresearchinyouraverage clubtodiscover
if more hot youngbirdsare askedif they wanta drinkor a dance than theirugly,fatoldsisters.
“Men puta high emphasison signalsof fertility such asyouth and hip-to-waistratio ,”saidProfessor
Raihani.InEnglishthatmeanswhena man runshisdiscerningeye overa lassie,the chances are that
hisgaze will lingerlongeronagoodlooker.
Anotherbreakthroughconclusionof thisstudywasthatpeople were more likelytodonate more if
the fundraiserwassmiling.Iwonderaboutthataswell.Imeanwhowouldn’twanttodonate
generouslytopeoplewholookedlikeextrasfromazombie flicksuchas “The NightOf The Living
Dead”?
Andin anotherlandmarkstudyreportedinthe journal “Evolutionary Psychology”,anotherBritish
researchteamhas concludedthatattractive menare more likelyto be selfishandlesslikelyto
favourequality.
Quite frankly,that’snonsense. There’snotaselfishbone in mybodyandI am quite preparedto
believethata fairnumberof the womenfolkare aboutasgoodas me.
If you thinkthatthere are far too many scientificpapersof doubtful directrelevance todailylifeand
itschallenges,thenyouare absolutelyspot-on.
In fact,researchersfromUniversitiesinthe USA andFinlandhave decidedthat,“Theexponential
growthin thenumberof scientific papersmakesit increasingly difficultfor researchersto keep track
of all of the publicationsrelevantto their work.”
Yes,it tooka researchprojectto decide that.

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More of the blinding bloody obvious from university researchers

  • 1. More ofthe blindingbloodyobviousfrom universityresearchers Russell Grenning Two Britishprofessorshave justspentagooddeal of time and,no doubt,a greatdeal of public moneytocome to the conclusionthatmengive more toa charityif the fundraiserisanattractive woman. Can youbelieve that?Isn’tthata simplymind-bogglingrevelation? Gosh,whatnext?Anin-depth researchprojectto determineif menof acertainage everthoughtthatMaggie Thatchercouldhave beena sensational lingeriemodel? The two researchersadmittedtonotknowingwhymenactuallydidthis while women,onthe other hand,appearedtobe unaffectedbythe looksof male fundraisers.Theysuspectthatthere isa fundamental biological differencebetweenthe sexes –at leastwhenitcomesto handingoveryour hard-earnedtocharity – betweenmenandwomen. Who wouldhave guessedthatthere were fundamental biological differencesbetweenthe sexes? Thank goodnessforthistrail-blazingresearch. I don’twant tobe thoughtof as beingan unreconstructed misogynisticoldfartbut itwas whenI readthe tworesearcherswere women –ProfessorsSarahSmithandNicholaRaihani –that I began to understandwhytheywere sosurprisedbythisconclusion.Nodoubt,theyare somarriedto their workthat theirrelationshipswithmenhave notperhapsbeenasin-depthasthose of more worldly- wise women. I couldhave toldthemthiswouldbe the resultof theirstudybefore theyevenstarted. I once observedachum of mine whowas legendaryforhismiserlinessmakingasizable donationto a charity whichIactuallyknewwascompletelyalientohisgeneral political convictions.He hada bag of tencentcoinsand was slowlydroppingthemone byone intothe donationtinof a petite little blondwitha quite extraordinary décolletage. He isa tallishblokeandwasstandingasclose as he couldto the buxomlasswithoutactually stompingonherfeetwhile he droppedinthe coinsandhiseyes,peeringdown,werefixedinan obsessive stare.Nodoubthe waslookingatthe tinand didn’twanttomissit withhisgentle rainof coins. Anyhow,backto the research. What the two professorsdidwasanalyse nearly700charity fundraisingpagesfromwebsiteof the 2014 LondonMarathon. Fundraisers whouse thisplatformpresenttheirname,photoandthe charityto receive the fundsraised.The attractivenessof the entrantswasjudgedusinga10-point score by fourreviewersof the oppositesex. “Fundraising pagesprovidea fascinating real-lifelaboratory forlooking atcharity donations.Now we see thatthe responsedepends,albeitsubconsciously,on thefundraiser’sattractiveness,” ProfessorSmithsaid.
  • 2. “Albeit subconsciously”?Wordsfail me. Nowhowabout thisstaggeringconclusion:Theybelieve thatthe mendonatingtoattractive women “are unwittingly displaying signalsof their generosity and wealth which,in evolutionary terms,are perceived by women asattractivefeaturesfora potentialsexualpartner.Men are moreinfluenced by physicalattractiveness.” I am amazed,justamazed,because thismeansthatblokesgoforyoungsexybirdsratherthanplain oldsheilas.The goodprofessorsshoulddosome follow-upresearchinyouraverage clubtodiscover if more hot youngbirdsare askedif they wanta drinkor a dance than theirugly,fatoldsisters. “Men puta high emphasison signalsof fertility such asyouth and hip-to-waistratio ,”saidProfessor Raihani.InEnglishthatmeanswhena man runshisdiscerningeye overa lassie,the chances are that hisgaze will lingerlongeronagoodlooker. Anotherbreakthroughconclusionof thisstudywasthatpeople were more likelytodonate more if the fundraiserwassmiling.Iwonderaboutthataswell.Imeanwhowouldn’twanttodonate generouslytopeoplewholookedlikeextrasfromazombie flicksuchas “The NightOf The Living Dead”? Andin anotherlandmarkstudyreportedinthe journal “Evolutionary Psychology”,anotherBritish researchteamhas concludedthatattractive menare more likelyto be selfishandlesslikelyto favourequality. Quite frankly,that’snonsense. There’snotaselfishbone in mybodyandI am quite preparedto believethata fairnumberof the womenfolkare aboutasgoodas me. If you thinkthatthere are far too many scientificpapersof doubtful directrelevance todailylifeand itschallenges,thenyouare absolutelyspot-on. In fact,researchersfromUniversitiesinthe USA andFinlandhave decidedthat,“Theexponential growthin thenumberof scientific papersmakesit increasingly difficultfor researchersto keep track of all of the publicationsrelevantto their work.” Yes,it tooka researchprojectto decide that.