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LBSNAA-KTP
1. K. K. Pathak CommitteeK. K. Pathak Committee
PresentsPresents
Some Probat ioners are More Equal Than
2. Warning
You are now entering
Zone of Great Danger.
viewers of weak sense of
humor take precautions.
3. Dedicated to
The Great Scientist Einstein
who motivated us
to conduct this
Highly Scientific Research
4. Declaration
The study is totally
objective.
Any resemblance in character or event is
purely
Superstitious.
5. We are introducing
The first superhero of academic world
beating
Superman
He man
Batman
&
Spiderman
Star cast
6. Introduction
KTP is a unique type of probationer.
It pretends to be an endangered species, but
in fact it is a dangerous species. In LBSNAA it is
found to be endemic from the early 18th
century,
but it is in fact reaching epidemic proportions.
All Probationers are born same , They differ in the Academy.
7. Meaning
KTP is not merely a probationer , it is a
phenomenon. It consists of three words.
Keen:- No exact synonym for this. It
depicts and distinguishes him from the
merely sincere and efficient.
Type:-It implies two things-
-the person is a type (‘namoona’)
-one person is not exactly same as another.
Probationer:- But after all these, he is still
a probationer and may remain so.
8. Source & Resource Centers
Manufacturing unit
Some are born KTP, Some acquire KTPness & Some have greatness thrust upon them.
UPSC LBSNAA Secretariat
Processing unit Promoting unit
9. “KT Pis like Don Juan. Everyone longs t o
be one, but no one likes t o be called one.”
- An early KTP
Quote of the Day
Note:- Don Juan is a literary character and known to
be a hedonist like Charvaka in Indian Philosophy.
10. History
Origin:
* Some experts consider God to be a KTP as he
is said to have created a whole new world in a
week, but in the process bungled it totally.
•Among the earliest KTPs was Moses, as he took
notes of Ten Commandments when God lectured
about them.
• In the Indian tradition, Hanuman is considered
to be a KTP as he even jumped across the sea
in his district assignment. Unfortunately, his
ppt presentation is not available.
19. KTPKTP Intake of civil servants
year
Number
1970
1980
1990
2000
2002
Note:-
On such rate
we expect
the total no.
of KTPs will
exceed total
intake by
2008
Incremental rate of Growth
21. Fingerprints of a KTP
• Highly complicated
ridgelines
• Patterns are Totally
unidentifiable to a
normal fingerprint
specialist
• Surprisingly common
in all KTPs
22. Astrological analysis
•Planets are highly
centralised
•Guru(Faculty) is in
Lagna(Sanlagna)
•Best Mahadasha of the
career(till Probation)
•Vakri Drishti of Shani
towards friends Bhava
•Mangalik Yoga (Threat in
being accompanied )
23. Mummy of a K.T.P. as Dissected & Found
Unique stretch
marks found
Dissection of a K T P of Ancient Egypt, 2000 B.C
Unique stretch
marks found
(result of
stretching the
brain)
Long nose designed to
poke into every affair
Big earlobes to
listen to all the
gossips
24. C.T. Scan of a K.T.P.
Specialties found:-
•A clear gap between cerebrum
and cerebellum,Causing difference
in work and opinion
•Left and right sides are bridged
with extra neurons,Called
meurons
•Able to use not only both parts of
his brain,but one part of others also
•Electrodes are unable to catch
wavelengths of thinking process,
shows that thoughts are either poor
or incorporated
Study of the brain of K.T.P.
25. Medical Analysis
•Infectious Hypertension
•Career related Hyper metropia
•Prone to Insomnia & Amnesia
•No hereditary disorder found
•Having Blue Blood Corpuscles
•Cardio vascular muscles have lost flexibility
•Some unidentified stiffness in spine
•E.C.G. shows broken heart beats
26. KT
TP
KT
TP
KT
TP
KT
TP
KT
KTP
*K,T& P - Only Three Proteins are found
in stead of four nucleotides- G,C,A & T
*Helix is too much twisted
*Extraordinary Genes are found
*K factor was found more dominant when
Mendalian theory was implemented
*Abnormal mutations
DNA analysis of KTP
27. Psychoanalysis
Disorders Alleged Disorders FoundTypes of Probationers
SKTP Schizophrenia Rapportophrenia
KTP Phobia ACRophobia
OKTP Mania Examania
NKTP Somnambulism Somnaclassism
Note:- In a Comprehensive Lab study it was found that
actually probationers have some
mysterious disorders like SARS and apparently different
31. A close scene
taken from Class
Room
Sh..Sh. .Don’t Disturb! An unknown Crypto KTP is contemplating online
Exclusions
•Crypto KTPs-There are several KTPs who pretend to be NKTP.
•Note:- Actually these are Pseudo NKTPs.
•Senior KTPs-They are holding some dignified post in Academy.
•Note:- Any resemblance to Faculty is inevitable.
32. Comparative Study
KTP
• Well Dressed
• Codified Manner
• Interrogative conversations
• Busy with & without business
Classroom, Library, P.T. Ground,
Faculties nearby
NKTP
•Casually Dressed
•Informal manner
•unusual conversations
•Never busy in any business
Mal Road, Ganga Dhaba,
Outside the class usually
Appearance
Availability
37. 10 Commandments of KTP
• Be curious
– by asking those questions for which you already know the answers
• Be courteous
– by saying please as a prefix & a suffix in every statement for please’s
sake
• Be cautious
– by following official & unofficial code of conduct
• Be contiguous
– by associating yourself to all except your colleagues
• Be competitive
– by competing with everyone including the messboys Continue…
Thou Shalt ...
38. 10 Commandments of KTP
• Be co-operative
– by making collusions without coordination and corroboration
• Be concentrated
– though there is nothing to concentrate on in academy
• Be contemporary
– by implementing all extra-traditional skills in behaviour
• Be commentative
– by commenting on all those issues, which have become redundant
• Be commanding
– by using computer commands in your conversation.
Continue…
39. Lacunae Recommendations
• Set Tradition , but no
codified manual for
KTPs
• Apparently deserves
Regard,but no any
Reward or Award (some
people think otherwise also)
• Not a single person is the
part of curriculum
• Make a detail Indian
Academic KTP Code with
handouts
• Declare a KTP Memorial
Award & Lifetime
Achievement Award
• Make them and their case
study a part of syllabus
Special Recommendation for this Report
• To be Accepted as thesis for Ph. D in academy
• To be sent to Swedish Academy for Noble Prize
• To be circulated to all successor probationers.
40. Further Recommendations on Possible uses of KTPsFurther Recommendations on Possible uses of KTPs
• KTPs have proved their efficiency n vision especially before and
after administration. They are supposed to be National Heritage and
International asset, therefore may be used
– For hybridization of Academics, Management & Administration
– For use of useful positions to make them useless and vice versa
– To train public behaviour to politicians inside the parliament and learn
administrative behaviour from them out of Parliament
Pict ures
of
KTP & NKTP
Af t er
Ret ir ement
41. Charges against research
During research some probationers
alleged that since this study has been
conducted by a KTP,so it is highly
bias towards KTPs.They claimed that
KTPs’ efficiency has been magnified
while NKTPs are neglected.
Thus we verified their
claims and found some extra ordinary
caliber of NKTPs.
42. Some observations on NKTPsSome observations on NKTPs
• Superfast Communication Techniques
– through paper-slips in class, thousand times faster
than yahoo messenger
• Highly digitized Biological Clock
– sleeps as soon as class starts. Not a single irregularity
found in this synchronization during whole course
• Hi-tech cooperation and Participation
– sharing all rare things on NN. Few have a record of
more hits than any other popular portal
• Firewall Protection System
– memo-proof and threat-protected
43. Keen Observations on NKTP
Spectacles with a outer screen
of open eyes so that one can
close his eyes without
knowledge of others
Ear voice Detector so that one
can sit in class without listening
the voice of speaker
High-tech Outbalanced shoes so
that one can do P.T. & Jogging in
sleep in auto-run mode
Some highly sophisticated & suspicious equipment are found with NKTPs
44. Learning Styles of NKTPs
Security Issues
*Where are u
going today?
*nowhere, after
this lousy class I
need sleep
*but u have
already slept one
hour in earlier class.
*So what?
*Tomorrow is a
module & u have
better opportunity to
sleep.
*Think of mall
*O. K.
*Be Careful! D.D. is
watching!
Security Issues
1. International Threat
2. National
3. Reg Th
4. Ind Z..z..z
z
z..
Z .z
Security Issues
1. International Threat
2. National Threat
3. Regional Threat
4. Individual Threat
Security Issues
Taught on PPT Written in Notebook NKTP-1
NKTP-2 NKTP-3
Class
notes
of
3
NKTPs
Class
notes
of
3
NKTPs
45. Scope
Our study is only concerned
with the present status of a
KTP.
In any case we are not
concerned about his
prior history
or
46. Statutory Warning!!!
KTPs are protected by and privileged under
KTP (Prevention of Cruelties) Act, 1799.
Any derogatory remarks about them will not be
excused.
For Further References:
• Civil Services (KTP Protection) Act- 1857
• Offending of Probationers Act -1953
47. CAUTION !
Frequent Running of this Program during Probation
May cause
Hang over in
The bureau-craft wares of O.T.s
And also
Hang
The Neuro-softwares of Faculty.