1. Feedback and how to
RECEIVE it
Eric De Pooter

2. Feedback and
how to
receive it
Definition
Receiving= skill to
develop
Receiving vs accepting
Too much ?
Direct indirect official unofficial direct
indirect clear unclear (non)verbal
Advantages
(Inner )development
•Trust
•Relationships
•Output and results
Development
Lead by
example
Resistance
•Who What How
Where Why When
Pull vs
push
Work
on me
first
Feedback
culture
Difficult
Receivers can’t receive
givers can ‘t give
Love Hate Fear
learn vs accept me as I am
Skills
• Self confidence?
• Assertiveness?
• Trust?
• Self efficacy
Coaching
Recognition
Evaluation

3. 3
?
Our reactions Unknown What to do with info
Honest intention Used against us
Pain Trauma Rejection Guilt

4. 4
Content: unfair, not helpful, untrue
Relationship: lack of trust, integrity, compentence
Me: me, myself and I endangered
TRIGGERS

5. Content
Recognition Coaching Evaluation

6. Content
6
Where does it come from
Expectations
Understanding
Content

7. Blind spots
7
Content

8. What are characteristics of the person
you would accept every feedback of?
8

9. Relationship
Trust
Integrity
Competence
Recognition
Respect
Autonomy

10. Me, myself and I
Personality differences
In giving
& receiving feedback

11. “No big deal”
Hate feedback “We’ll see”
Recovery from negative
Duration of positive
Low
High
High

12. 12

13. 13
Complexity
World
People
Intentions

14. 14
Compassion

15. 15

16. 16
Self efficacy vs self confidence

17. Some basics
Do
• Mind your emotions
• Listen and shut up
• Ask for examples
• Summarize and check
• Ask for suggestions
• Thank
• Say what you will (not) do
Do not
• Do not interrupt
• Do not get defensive
• No “yes but…”
• Do not accept everything just like that
17

18. Act... like in ACTION
Know yourself & your feedback
reaction pattern
Prepare & exercise
Ask support

19. Have a good life!
Eric De Pooter