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Qualities of a Good Counselor
What qualities or attributes should you possess as a counselor in order to pass on effective messages
and communication to your patient/clients?
Counseling is the application of mental health, psychological or human development principles,
through cognitive, affective, behavioral or systemic intervention strategies, that address wellness,
personal growth, or career development, as well as pathology. Thus counseling focuses on helping
people make changes unlike guidance that focuses on helping individuals choose what they value
most. Therefore a counselor is a person who gives counsel or advice.
Counselors work in diverse community settings designed to provide a variety of counseling,
rehabilitation, and support ser-vices. Their duties vary greatly, depending on their specialty,
which is determined by the setting in which they work and the population they serve. Although the
specific setting may have an implied scope of practice, counselors frequently are challenged with
children, adolescents, adults, or families that have multiple issues, such as mental health disorders
and addiction, disability and employment needs, school problem or career counseling needs, and
trauma. Counselors must recognize these issues in order to provide their clients with appropriate
counseling and support.
To be a good counselor you must possess the following qualities:
Patience:
You need to be very patient. Go to the next step of explanation only when the
patient/client has clearly understood the content of the information you are giving. Thus
you need to have ample time for the client/patient.
Good Listening:
You need to be a good listener. Never interrupt what the patient/client has /is to say.
Give your inputs only when the client / patient has finished talking.
Observant:
You need to be very observant and able to interpret non-verbal communication e.g. if the
patient/client looks angry, find out the cause of his/her anger first.
Warm:
Provide non-possessive warmth in a counseling environment. Smile and show concern
and acceptance to the patient/client.
Knowledgeable:
You should have good knowledge on the topic /problem e.g. compliance to medication.
Some people do not take medication for one reason or the other, while others demand
drugs/medication. For example, Muslims do not take oral medication when they are
fasting while Jehovah’s witnesses do not take blood transfusion. Understanding the
factors why people may not do certain activities at specific time will assist to assist them
better.
Having empathy with the patient/client:
Try to understand the feelings the patient/client is having in the counseling process. In
other words put yourself in his/her position.
Maintaining a therapeutic relationship with a patient:
Give the patient/client the opportunity to make his/her own decision from your message.
Confidentiality:
Although confidentiality is important in health matters it does not apply very much to all
situations e.g. most people will openly say what they feel/ the problem they are having.
However, ensure that you maintain confidentiality on what the patient/client tells you.
The patient/client would feel greatly offended if you disclose any information about him
or her to other people. This means that counseling must be done individually and
privately.
Personal integrity:
Maintain a high degree of personal integrity, credibility and mutual trust as a counselor.
MICROSKILLS
In this post we summarise the following eight fundamental skills that alone or together
can help a client to access their deepest thoughts or clarify their future dreams:
1. Attending Behaviour
2. Questioning
3. Responding
4. Noting and Reflecting
5. Client Observation
6. Confrontation
7. Focusing
8. Influencing
Attending Behaviour
Attending behaviours encourage clients to talk and show that the counsellor is
interested in what’s being said.
When it’s used: Throughout the entire counselling interview. Particularly
important in the initial stages of establishing rapport.
Examples: Attentive body language (eye contact, leaning forward slightly,
encouraging gestures).
Questioning
Effective questioning helps guide the counselling conversation and may assist in
enriching the client’s story.
When it’s used: Questioning is useful in the information gathering stage of the
interview. It can however be an important skill to use throughout the entire
process.
Examples: “What brings you to mediation today?” “How does that make you
feel?”
Responding
Accurate Responding allows the counsellor to confirm with the client that they are being
heard correctly.
When it’s used: Responding is useful throughout all stages of a counselling
interview. It helps the counsellor to clarify and encourage clients’ stories. This is
also a great skill to teach clients when responding to each other in mediation.
Examples: “Let me see if I’ve got this right. You want to go back to full time study
but are worried about your financial commitments?”
Noting and Reflecting
Noting and reflecting is used to bring out underlying feelings.
When it’s used: Noting and reflecting can assist in adding the emotional
dimension to the client’s story, so is often used in the interview stages of
gathering information and exploring alternatives. Another great skill to teach
clients in the process.
Examples: “You feel disappointed because your mother didn’t call you on your
birthday.”
Client Observation
Skilled client observation allows the counsellor to identify discrepancies or incongruities
in the client’s or their own communication.
When it’s used: Observation is a skill that is utilised throughout the entire
counselling interviews.
Examples: Observing body language, tone of voice and facial expressions.
Confrontation
Confrontation is a skill that can assist clients to increase their self-awareness. It can be
used to highlight discrepancies that clients have previously been unaware of.
When it’s used: Confrontation is often used when the counsellor observes mixed
messages or incongruities in the client’s words, behaviours, feelings or thoughts.
Confrontation should only be used after rapport has been developed between
client and counsellor.
Examples: “You say you would like to do further study but you haven’t contacted
the training institution.”
Focusing
Focusing enables a counsellor to direct client’s conversational flow into certain areas.
When it’s used: Focusing is a skill that is relevant to all stages of a counselling
interview. This skill however should be used sparingly.
Examples: After noticing that a client has mentioned very little about his family,
the counsellor, (believing the family is relevant) directs the conversation toward
the client’s family.
Influencing
Influencing may facilitate change in the way a client chooses to think or act.
When it’s used: Influencing is generally used when the client is exploring
alternative ways of thinking or behaving.
Examples: A counsellor notices the conflict between two parties that have
children together. The counsellor discusses the possible long and short term
consequences of their conflict on their children.
There are five stages of counseling process which includes the following.
● Establishment of a rapport with the client (Relationship building) ...
● Assessment and Diagnosis. ...
● Intervention and Problem-solving. ...
● Termination and Follow up. ...
● Effective Listening and Attendant Behaviors. ...
● Questioning and Interviewing Skills. ...
● Analytic Skills.
GATHER guide to counseling
Counseling about family planning (FP) and other reproductive health issues requires a
set of specific skills designed to facilitate informed decision-making. The GATHER
approach to counseling--Greet, Ask, Tell, Help, Explain, and Return--has documented
effectiveness in FP programs. The more of the GATHER elements a counselor uses, the
more satisfied clients are with their care and the more likely they are to use
contraception. This guide provides detailed information on each of the 6 elements of
the GATHER model, including key phrases, sample provider actions, and teaching
exercises. A chart presents information on available FP methods--mechanism of action,
advantages, disadvantages, use requirements, and follow-up. Special sections address
topics such as FP for women who are breast feeding, emergency oral contraception,
and counseling adolescents. Other sections offer guidelines on responding to a client's
feelings, "active listening," talking about sex comfortably, and advising without being
controlling. Finally, a checklist is included so counselors can rate themselves on each of
the GATHER skills. An earlier version of this guide has been used around the world for
the past 10 years.
The following are the most common types of counselling:
● Marriage and Family Counselling.
● Educational Counselling.
● Rehabilitation Counselling.
● Mental Health Counselling.
● Substance Abuse Counselling
Psychosynthesis is a therapeutic approach that derives from psychoanalysis. ...
Psychosynthesis is a conscious attempt to cooperate with this natural process of
personal development in order to foster awareness, self-healing, and a greater
connection to the ever-changing nature of human life.
Counseling provided by trained professionals can make a profound impact on the lives
of individuals, families and communities. This service helps people navigate difficult life
situations, such as the death of a loved one, divorce, natural disasters, school stress
and the loss of a job
Good counselling should reduce the client's confusion, allowing them to make effective
decisions leading to positive changes in their attitude and/or behaviour. The ultimate
aim of counselling is to enable the client to make their own choices, reach their own
decisions and act upon them
COVID-19, FEAR AND WHAT
COUNSELLORS CAN DO TO HELP
A member of our writing team related the following experience during these times of
near-lockdown. She had gone out to do some essentials such as grocery shopping and
getting prescriptions filled for her healthy but self-isolating husband. Returning home,
she threw down her things, wailed, “It’s just awful”, and burst into tears. Her astonished
husband enquired, “What happened?”
“I’ve never had errand-running and shopping be such a dismal experience,” she
lamented. “After four pharmacies, I could still only get one of your items filled, because
everyone has panic-bought huge supplies of the others. Pharmacists still don’t know
when they’ll get more stock. The grocery store had rows of empty shelves, so your
request for bread and milk is not fulfilled. There is nary a frozen veggie to be had, and
you had better pace yourself on the toilet paper we managed to score last month; I’ve
been out six times without spotting a single roll. Does it even exist? The look on
shoppers’ faces is nothing short of glum. And when I went to check out, the girl at the
checkout counter gave me a frozen smile, told me to pack my own bags, and
conspicuously stepped back, sanitising her hands as I was trying to stuff food into bags
and get away. She acted like I was a walking virus!”
After a mood-restoring cup of tea, our colleague was able to disidentify from the
frustration, but her experience — which resonates with many of us trying to do “normal”
life in these abnormal times — gave her the insight that the world is actually fighting two
pandemics now: COVID-19 and the parallel virus of fear and panic which is generating
over-reactive, anti-social behaviour, stigma, and other psycho-social problems. It is that
“virus” which we address in today’s article.
Assigment

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  • 1. Qualities of a Good Counselor What qualities or attributes should you possess as a counselor in order to pass on effective messages and communication to your patient/clients? Counseling is the application of mental health, psychological or human development principles, through cognitive, affective, behavioral or systemic intervention strategies, that address wellness, personal growth, or career development, as well as pathology. Thus counseling focuses on helping people make changes unlike guidance that focuses on helping individuals choose what they value most. Therefore a counselor is a person who gives counsel or advice. Counselors work in diverse community settings designed to provide a variety of counseling, rehabilitation, and support ser-vices. Their duties vary greatly, depending on their specialty, which is determined by the setting in which they work and the population they serve. Although the specific setting may have an implied scope of practice, counselors frequently are challenged with children, adolescents, adults, or families that have multiple issues, such as mental health disorders and addiction, disability and employment needs, school problem or career counseling needs, and trauma. Counselors must recognize these issues in order to provide their clients with appropriate counseling and support. To be a good counselor you must possess the following qualities: Patience: You need to be very patient. Go to the next step of explanation only when the patient/client has clearly understood the content of the information you are giving. Thus you need to have ample time for the client/patient. Good Listening: You need to be a good listener. Never interrupt what the patient/client has /is to say. Give your inputs only when the client / patient has finished talking. Observant: You need to be very observant and able to interpret non-verbal communication e.g. if the patient/client looks angry, find out the cause of his/her anger first. Warm: Provide non-possessive warmth in a counseling environment. Smile and show concern and acceptance to the patient/client. Knowledgeable: You should have good knowledge on the topic /problem e.g. compliance to medication. Some people do not take medication for one reason or the other, while others demand drugs/medication. For example, Muslims do not take oral medication when they are fasting while Jehovah’s witnesses do not take blood transfusion. Understanding the factors why people may not do certain activities at specific time will assist to assist them better.
  • 2. Having empathy with the patient/client: Try to understand the feelings the patient/client is having in the counseling process. In other words put yourself in his/her position. Maintaining a therapeutic relationship with a patient: Give the patient/client the opportunity to make his/her own decision from your message. Confidentiality: Although confidentiality is important in health matters it does not apply very much to all situations e.g. most people will openly say what they feel/ the problem they are having. However, ensure that you maintain confidentiality on what the patient/client tells you. The patient/client would feel greatly offended if you disclose any information about him or her to other people. This means that counseling must be done individually and privately. Personal integrity: Maintain a high degree of personal integrity, credibility and mutual trust as a counselor. MICROSKILLS In this post we summarise the following eight fundamental skills that alone or together can help a client to access their deepest thoughts or clarify their future dreams: 1. Attending Behaviour 2. Questioning 3. Responding 4. Noting and Reflecting 5. Client Observation 6. Confrontation 7. Focusing 8. Influencing Attending Behaviour Attending behaviours encourage clients to talk and show that the counsellor is interested in what’s being said. When it’s used: Throughout the entire counselling interview. Particularly important in the initial stages of establishing rapport.
  • 3. Examples: Attentive body language (eye contact, leaning forward slightly, encouraging gestures). Questioning Effective questioning helps guide the counselling conversation and may assist in enriching the client’s story. When it’s used: Questioning is useful in the information gathering stage of the interview. It can however be an important skill to use throughout the entire process. Examples: “What brings you to mediation today?” “How does that make you feel?” Responding Accurate Responding allows the counsellor to confirm with the client that they are being heard correctly. When it’s used: Responding is useful throughout all stages of a counselling interview. It helps the counsellor to clarify and encourage clients’ stories. This is also a great skill to teach clients when responding to each other in mediation. Examples: “Let me see if I’ve got this right. You want to go back to full time study but are worried about your financial commitments?” Noting and Reflecting Noting and reflecting is used to bring out underlying feelings. When it’s used: Noting and reflecting can assist in adding the emotional dimension to the client’s story, so is often used in the interview stages of gathering information and exploring alternatives. Another great skill to teach clients in the process. Examples: “You feel disappointed because your mother didn’t call you on your birthday.”
  • 4. Client Observation Skilled client observation allows the counsellor to identify discrepancies or incongruities in the client’s or their own communication. When it’s used: Observation is a skill that is utilised throughout the entire counselling interviews. Examples: Observing body language, tone of voice and facial expressions. Confrontation Confrontation is a skill that can assist clients to increase their self-awareness. It can be used to highlight discrepancies that clients have previously been unaware of. When it’s used: Confrontation is often used when the counsellor observes mixed messages or incongruities in the client’s words, behaviours, feelings or thoughts. Confrontation should only be used after rapport has been developed between client and counsellor. Examples: “You say you would like to do further study but you haven’t contacted the training institution.” Focusing Focusing enables a counsellor to direct client’s conversational flow into certain areas. When it’s used: Focusing is a skill that is relevant to all stages of a counselling interview. This skill however should be used sparingly. Examples: After noticing that a client has mentioned very little about his family, the counsellor, (believing the family is relevant) directs the conversation toward the client’s family. Influencing Influencing may facilitate change in the way a client chooses to think or act.
  • 5. When it’s used: Influencing is generally used when the client is exploring alternative ways of thinking or behaving. Examples: A counsellor notices the conflict between two parties that have children together. The counsellor discusses the possible long and short term consequences of their conflict on their children. There are five stages of counseling process which includes the following. ● Establishment of a rapport with the client (Relationship building) ... ● Assessment and Diagnosis. ... ● Intervention and Problem-solving. ... ● Termination and Follow up. ... ● Effective Listening and Attendant Behaviors. ... ● Questioning and Interviewing Skills. ... ● Analytic Skills. GATHER guide to counseling Counseling about family planning (FP) and other reproductive health issues requires a set of specific skills designed to facilitate informed decision-making. The GATHER approach to counseling--Greet, Ask, Tell, Help, Explain, and Return--has documented effectiveness in FP programs. The more of the GATHER elements a counselor uses, the more satisfied clients are with their care and the more likely they are to use contraception. This guide provides detailed information on each of the 6 elements of the GATHER model, including key phrases, sample provider actions, and teaching exercises. A chart presents information on available FP methods--mechanism of action, advantages, disadvantages, use requirements, and follow-up. Special sections address topics such as FP for women who are breast feeding, emergency oral contraception, and counseling adolescents. Other sections offer guidelines on responding to a client's feelings, "active listening," talking about sex comfortably, and advising without being controlling. Finally, a checklist is included so counselors can rate themselves on each of the GATHER skills. An earlier version of this guide has been used around the world for the past 10 years.
  • 6. The following are the most common types of counselling: ● Marriage and Family Counselling. ● Educational Counselling. ● Rehabilitation Counselling. ● Mental Health Counselling. ● Substance Abuse Counselling Psychosynthesis is a therapeutic approach that derives from psychoanalysis. ... Psychosynthesis is a conscious attempt to cooperate with this natural process of personal development in order to foster awareness, self-healing, and a greater connection to the ever-changing nature of human life. Counseling provided by trained professionals can make a profound impact on the lives of individuals, families and communities. This service helps people navigate difficult life situations, such as the death of a loved one, divorce, natural disasters, school stress and the loss of a job Good counselling should reduce the client's confusion, allowing them to make effective decisions leading to positive changes in their attitude and/or behaviour. The ultimate aim of counselling is to enable the client to make their own choices, reach their own decisions and act upon them COVID-19, FEAR AND WHAT COUNSELLORS CAN DO TO HELP A member of our writing team related the following experience during these times of near-lockdown. She had gone out to do some essentials such as grocery shopping and getting prescriptions filled for her healthy but self-isolating husband. Returning home, she threw down her things, wailed, “It’s just awful”, and burst into tears. Her astonished husband enquired, “What happened?” “I’ve never had errand-running and shopping be such a dismal experience,” she lamented. “After four pharmacies, I could still only get one of your items filled, because
  • 7. everyone has panic-bought huge supplies of the others. Pharmacists still don’t know when they’ll get more stock. The grocery store had rows of empty shelves, so your request for bread and milk is not fulfilled. There is nary a frozen veggie to be had, and you had better pace yourself on the toilet paper we managed to score last month; I’ve been out six times without spotting a single roll. Does it even exist? The look on shoppers’ faces is nothing short of glum. And when I went to check out, the girl at the checkout counter gave me a frozen smile, told me to pack my own bags, and conspicuously stepped back, sanitising her hands as I was trying to stuff food into bags and get away. She acted like I was a walking virus!” After a mood-restoring cup of tea, our colleague was able to disidentify from the frustration, but her experience — which resonates with many of us trying to do “normal” life in these abnormal times — gave her the insight that the world is actually fighting two pandemics now: COVID-19 and the parallel virus of fear and panic which is generating over-reactive, anti-social behaviour, stigma, and other psycho-social problems. It is that
  • 8. “virus” which we address in today’s article.