Transactional Analysis

Transactional Analysis
Games People Play

Ego States
Ego States in Man
Parental
Adult
Child
“Do as I say!”
“I’ll be frank with you..”
“What shall I do?”

Strokes – the result of hunger
Structure Hunger
Stimulus Hunger
Position
Hunger
People ‘hunger’ for recognition

Strokes
“Warm fuzzies”
“Cold pricklies”
Positive
Negative
Recognition | Attention | Responsiveness

Theories governing behaviour
Gene theory – I am made that way
Make me feel theory – You make me feel
You-owe me theory – If only you change
Subconscious theory – Suddenly you got hold of me and I could do nothing.
The fate theory – It was willed by Him

Types of Strokes
Conditional
Positive – “You’ve made a fantastic presentation!”
Negative – “That was the worst report I ever read.”
Unconditional
Positive – “You’re a nice guy!”
Negative – “I’ve never seen anyone as arrogant as you.”

Seek out ways to give more unconditional positive responses.
Listen carefully to positive strokes from others.

Everyone occupies a preferred basic life position (BLP).

The Power of Scripts
“I won't amount to anything and I deserved to be locked up in a prison”

Life Scripts – Traps
Abandonment
“I get desperate when someone I love moves away”
Mistrust
“I’m angry about what people have done to me”
Emotional deprivation
“I feel disconnected, even from people closest to me”
Dependence
“I find everyday life overwhelming”

Life Scripts – Traps
Vulnerability
“Something bad is about to happen”
Defectiveness
“I’m inherently flawed”
Subjugation
“If I don’t give in to others, they will reject me”
Failure
“I don’t have any special talents”

How Scripts Shape Life

‘Scripting’ your own life
Armstrong
Alfred Nobel
Eminem
Harbhajan
Helen Keller

Games People Play
Greeting
“Hello, how are you?”
“I’m good, what about you?”
Camouflage
Indirect hints – barely perceptible
“Wow, Bill lost 20 pounds. He looks great!”
Corner
Damned if you do, damned if you don’t
Meeting
“Oh, so pleased to meet you!”
Wooden Leg
Eliciting sympathy – using excuses
“How can I be patient with kids? I am short-tempered!!”

Games People Play
Switch – reversal in roles/positions
The victim-persecutor role reversal
Cross – disorientation between the two when switch happens
Payoff – person getting justification for inaction and attention

One life – that’s all we have. What do you want to do with yours?