This document provides tips for effectively communicating difficult news or situations. Some key skills needed include being both firm and gentle, preparing yourself emotionally, gathering all relevant information, being empathetic, listening actively, staying calm and focused, and keeping the message brief and clear. Lessons from how doctors deliver bad medical news to patients emphasize showing empathy, answering questions, and maintaining a positive attitude. The way difficult news is communicated can significantly impact how the receiver perceives and responds to the situation.
Skills Required to Communicate Difficult Situations
1. Skills Required To Communicate
Difficult Situations
Oyewole O, Sarumi PhD
2.
3. Introduction
• There has to be a balance between
communicating something difficult and
being as sensitive as possible to those
concerned.
• The skill set required to do this may seem
somewhat contradictory as you may need
to be both firm and gentle in your
approach.
4. Difficult Situations
• Jack's boss has just told him that, due to
budget cuts, several people in his team
will have to go.
• Jack manages a happy, successful,
team……but wonder how to deliver this
bad news.
5. • As manager you should've experienced a
similar situation, or will have to face one
like it in the future.
• By learning how to deliver bad news
honestly, openly, and empathetically, you
can help to preserve your working
relationships, rather than damage them.
6. The Art of Delivery is Key!!!
• After all, the way you communicate bad
news can have a direct impact on how the
receiver perceives and reacts to the
situation, and the way that you
communicate in this difficult situation is
likely be remembered – either positively or
negatively – for a long time.
7. Some Bad News
• Some bad or difficult news you’ll have to
deliver at some point in your career
include:
– Tell your boss that a major project is over
budget
– Tell your team about lay-offs
– To go on camera to say that your product has
safety issues.
8. Lessons From the
Medical Field
• Much of the research on delivering bad news
comes from medicine. It's so important, in this
context, that the American Medical Association
first included it in its code of conduct as far back
as 1847.
• Physicians and trauma surgeons often have to
deliver difficult – or even devastating – news to
their patients. We can apply some of the
strategies that they've adopted to a business
environment.
9. • Research in the Journal of Trauma-Injury
Infection & Critical Care outlines the
qualities which family members value most
in doctors or nurses who communicate
bad news.
10. • This research shows that – from the
receiver's perspective – the four most
important factors are (in order of
importance):
– The news-giver's attitude.
– The clarity of the message.
– Privacy.
– The person's ability to answer questions.
11. • These findings give a useful guide in the
world of business as well.
• Essentially, they show that your attitude
and communication skills have an
enormous impact on how your message
will be received.
12. 1. Prepare Yourself
Emotionally
• Bad news can be stressful for anyone who's
involved in the conversation.
• To manage this stress, it's important to prepare
yourself first.
• Take time to calm your mind, focus, and think
about what you want to say.
13. • If you do this, your emotions are less likely
to get the better of you during the
conversation.
• By speaking in a calm and clear manner,
you'll demonstrate that you're prepared
and professional.
• As such, you're less likely to make the
situation worse.
14. 2. Information Gathering
• Make sure you have your facts straight
before you begin, know what you are
going to say and why you are going to
say it. Try to anticipate any questions or
concerns others may have and think carefully
about how you will answer questions.
• To identify some solutions, if there are any
available. You may not be able to make things
right, but you can minimize upset.
15. 3. Being Assertive
• Once you are sure that something
needs to be communicated then do so
in an assertive way. Do not find yourself
backing down or changing your mind mid-
conversation, unless of course there is
very good reason to do so.
16. 4. Being Empathic
• Put yourself in the other person’s
shoes and think about how they will feel
about what you are telling them; how
would you feel if the roles were
reversed? Give others time to ask
questions and make comments.
17. 5. Be Genuine
• When the time comes to deliver the
message, try to be authentic and
compassionate, and treat the other person
with respect and dignity.
• Don't try to "sugarcoat" the truth; it's best
to be forthright and honest about what's
happened, and about what you're going to
do to make it right.
18. • Your attitude and the clarity of your
message are two very important
components in this conversation. Be open,
clear, and honest.
• If you're responsible for the situation, try to
explain frankly how your actions
contributed to the event.
19. • It may help to build trust with the other
person by openly communicating what
your role was, and by apologizing.
• Don't try to blame someone else or falsely
justify your actions; this is ethically wrong,
and it can damage your reputation.
20. 6.Be Prepared to Negotiate
• Often a difficult situation requires a
certain amount of negotiation, be
prepared for this. When negotiating, aim
for a win-win outcome – that is, some way
in which all parties can benefit.
21. 7. Using Appropriate Verbal
and Non-Verbal Language
• Speak clearly avoiding any jargon that
other parties may not understand, give eye
contact and try to sit or stand in a relaxed
way. Do not use confrontational language
or body language.
22. 8. Pay Attention to Setting
and Timing
• Choose a private setting for your conversation
with the person.
• Privacy allows the freedom to respond and cope
in a way that's comfortable-a key part of helping
them to move forward. Make sure no
interruption.
• Pay attention to timing, it’s best to deliver bad
news promptly, not skipping the essential
preparation. "Sitting" on bad news can start
rumors, and it might also damage your
reputation.
23. 9. Listen Actively
• When stressed we tend to listen less
well, try to relax and listen carefully to
the views, opinions and feelings of the
other person/people. Use clarification
and reflection techniques to offer feedback
and demonstrate that you were listening.
24. 10. Staying Calm and
Focused
• Communication becomes easier when
we are calm, take some deep breaths and
try to maintain an air of calmness, others
are more likely to remain calm if you
do. Keep focused on what you want to
say, don’t deviate or get distracted from
the reason that you are communicating.
25. 11. Where Appropriate, Focus
on the Positive
• If appropriate, try to find a positive in the
situation: it can help to remember the
phrase "Every cloud has a silver lining."
• However, be sensitive with this. If the
news you're delivering is truly bad, it will
be counterproductive to point out
positives.
26. 12. Brevity & Clarity Is Key
• Giving a brief message that quickly gets to
the point is generally appreciated by
everyone involved.
• The line between brevity and insultingly
short lies in clarity. If the message lacks
clarity then you may leave more questions
than you do answers
27. • When you can successfully march brevity
with clarity in a concise and direct
communication, you are mastering “bad
news delivery,” as one of true hard parts of
leadership.
28. Conclusion
• Delivering bad news well can actually
strengthen your relationship with
colleagues.
• It's definitely worth learning how to do it
successfully!
• Being the bearer of bad news is never fun,
but following these tips can make it a little
less difficult for both you and those that
you are delivering it to.
Find more at: http://www.skillsyouneed.com/ips/communication-difficult-situations.html#ixzz4DRx1v466
Even in one on one situations, the awkward build up to the “Message” is painful for both people. So get to the point, and when in doubt say less than you feel is necessary.