i was asked by my english Tutor to come up with my favourite topic while i was an intern last year 2010 at SAEP

1. NJAMELA ANDILE
TOPIC ;LONLINESS
Loneliness or feeling lonely owing to emotional imbalance
Man is a social creature. Normally we experience loneliness for the first time when we are away from
home, family and friends and are no longer supported by familiar surroundings. Adapting to a new
environment makes people uncertain of what to do or how to behave and breeds insecurities which,
may coupled with the lonely nature of job or work, can make for a real sense of isolation. For this
reason, many people suffer from loneliness.
Loneliness is an emotional state of mind, which is often confused with depression. Loneliness need not
cause serious health problems but can do so if overlooked. Homesickness, nostalgia and many other
behavioral negativities may increase the feeling of loneliness. Loneliness can be so powerful that it
may bring about a deep and persistent feeling of uselessness and rejection from society. It is often those
who are more used to feeling lonely who deal best with the transitional period of leaving home. Please
understand that being alone does not represent loneliness, on the contrary being alone can be very
healthy. We all need to be alone from time to time. Some activities such thinking, reading and writing
are often best done in lonely surroundings.
More people suffer from loneliness than you might think. Feelings of loneliness could impede overall
progress. No matter your age or intelligence, loneliness wastes opportunities for friendship and can
cause some individuals deep unbearable pain. Understanding the fundamental characteristics of
loneliness enables us to identify it in ourselves as well as in others. 'Loneliness or feeling lonely' is
something we all suffer from in varying degrees. Excessive loneliness or feeling lonely tendency in
human nature may develop out of apprehension, uncertainty and even fear. Once it is identified; its
effects can be reduced, obviously reducing the intensity of loneliness improves the quality of life.
Introversion, self-consciousness, shyness and difficulty in approaching people to initiate relationships
are all clear signs of being lonely. Normally lonely people are ineffective at building relationships.
They avoid communication because they think interaction may result in conflicts and conflicts or
problems in a relationship mean that the relationship has 'failed' in some way. However this is not
necessarily true, in fact healthy conflicts can make relationships stronger. Frequent Loneliness or
feeling lonely tendency in nature can leave us with a sense of low self-esteem where one become self-
conscious and feels that he has been rejected; it is very difficult to overcome. Lonely people tend to
blame both themselves and others for their unhappiness. They may be reluctant to even try and take
new responsibilities or take part in group-activities, and will also find it difficult to say 'no' to things,
leaving you feeling exploited and weak. Lonely people are often self-centered and think only of
themselves.
People normally prone to loneliness or feeling lonely negativity because they expect too much from
friends and family. Many time their unrealistic expectations more than what they could reasonably
expect from their relationships brings disillusionment, frustration and disappointment. Apart they often
misinterpret their loneliness for depression. This may make them behave in a 'depressed' manner at all
the time and make the situation much more serious. Lonely people found very hasty in taking major life
decisions. Many lonely people suffer from an unnecessary sense of urgency and desperation about
having to quickly establish a special confidant or partner.

2. Few of the major symptoms of loneliness feeling lonely symptom include:
Self-preoccupied with excessive work.
Dissatisfaction with social or family relationships.
Negative attitudes towards life.
Bitterness towards life
Self-condemnation tendency
Passing judgment on others
Shaming experiences
An inability to create, develop and maintain interpersonal relationships.
Poor emotional "fit"
Lack of self-motivation.
Public embarrassment for poor performance

3. Workholism
Lack of direction.
Genetic or Biological Influences
Least interest in activities of others.
Failure to initiate social contact
Lethargy.
Frequent sadness, loneliness or resentment
A feeling of emptiness and being very much alone.
A feeling that your intimate needs are not being met or, if they are, they seem unsatisfying.
Few or no friends
Bookworm or Excessive user of PC
Over-reacting to everyday events that you would generally take in your stride.
Feeling worthless, helpless, powerless, unacceptable, self-absorbed.

4. Passivity or pessimism
Feeling separated from other people.
Highly sensitive, when lacking adequate social support
Feeling bored, self-pitying, sad and sometimes depressed.
Excessive time spent on academic work or solitary professional activity to the exclusion of social
interaction.
Feeling nervous and disoriented.
Low self-esteem and the feeling that there is no one with whom you can communicate openly,
honestly, and intimately.
Loneliness or feeling lonely and Negative emotions co-relation.
Often the causes of "Loneliness or feeling lonely Tendency in behavior" are more mental than physical.
A bad relationship, poor self image, a history of abuse, stress, frustration and many other factors can
change your overall attitude towards life which may directly impede your overall performance. Such
tendencies are deep-rooted in mind and nurtured by excessive Negative Emotions.
It is needless to mention that these negative emotions are tremendously powerful. They can debilitate
lives extremely quick by causing disparity in energy system, which triggers a sequence of emotional
imbalance (i.e. frustration, melancholia, persistent agony, mental instability, uncontrolled anger,
inferiority complex etc.), which ultimately culminates in ill health.
IF YOU ARE ALONE DON'T HESITATE COME AND TALK TO ANDILE NJAMELA.
OR E-MAIL ME AT ajaih.njamela@gmail.com