Personal story about living and working in UK. Communication bumps and bruises.

1. How to avoid being a jerk
when dealing with natives
or a personal story about surviving among native speakers

2. Tatiana Labkovich
• Senior Product Manager at Elsevier Ltd.
• Moved to London 2.5 years ago
20 minutes
My story & tips
10 minutes
Q & A
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3. Bumps and bruises
It's a very different experience to work with foreigners on
your land and on their land
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4. One can’t make an omelette
without breaking eggs
• Be careful saying “No”
• Open conflicts will come back to bite you in the butt
• People may read your emotions wrong
• Difficult situations are inevitable
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5. 5

6. Erin Meyer: differences surfaced
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C O M M U N I C A T I N G
Low context High context
RU
GB
US
E V A L U A T I N G
Direct Negative Feedback Indirect Negative Feedback
RU GB
US
T R U S T I N G
Task-based Relationship-based
RU
GB
US
D I S A G R E E I NG
Confrontational Avoid confrontation
RU GB
US
P E R S U A D I N G
Principles first Application first
RU GB US

7. Mindset differences glass
half-full and half-empty
• Great minds think alike
• To kill two birds with one stone
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8. Quiz time
When someone bumps into you in
the street, being British you ...
Someone is sitting in your
reserved train seat and the
carriage is full. Being British you ...
When you say, “things didn’t quite
go to plan”, being British you
actually mean ...
You’re told you’re required to
attend a team bonding day,
involving lots of fun physical
challenges with your workmates.
Being British you ...
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9. Be yourself.
Polite version of yourself
“Я так па-чартоўску злуюся на гэтую фігню, мне тут
чортава трэба заняцца, а не гуляць у дурныя гульні
з дырэктарамі інжынерных кур, якія хочуць
схаваць і атрымаць крыху больш заробку.”
My angry British Colleague in Slack
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10. Speaking a
foreign
language is an
achievement
English-speaking people appreciate
us making an effort to learn their
language.
(So, they don’t have to)
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11. Real-life examples
Acknowledge A Need, Then Act
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12. Benefits and meaning
of the small talk
Grease the wheels
of the conversation
Get the vibe of
your audience:
Friend or Foe?
Conversation filler
when you don't
have a topic to
talk about
Acknowledge
what is the level
of familiarity
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13. Greeting problems
"Hi! How are you?"
Yeah good, you?
Not bad,
yourself?
Same same
Same as usual,
thanks for asking!
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14. I am awfully sorry to interject
but I need to go now.
It’s been great to see everybody –
super conversation, look forward
to catching up with all of you soon!
Apologies, I need to
jump on to another
meeting now.
I am awfully sorry,
but I need to get back to my desk
because I need to *make a call, great
to see you!
I just have another
commitment that I need
to get done by the end
of the day, so I am
gonna head off now,
if you don’t mind.
How to
politely stop
the
conversation
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15. Look, we’ve talked about this quite a lot.
We have a lot to get through in the time left.
If people don’t mind let’s move on to the next item.
How to
switch
conversation
topic without
being rude
I’m glad you brought that topic up. That reminds me of a question
I want to ask ... (then introduce a new topic).
This is a really good topic, but can we table this for now?
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16. Brilliant idea, can I have
more details, please?
And some more? And even more?
Thank you so much
for coming to me with this,
I’ll have a think and get back to
you as soon as I can.
Thanks for thinking of me,
but I have so much on my
plate right now.
I would really love to help!
Do you mind if I come back to
you next week?
How to
politely say
NO when you
are not
allowed to
say no?
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17. I also really want to get this
done. Unfortunately, my update
hasn’t changed.
When there are irrational
situations it’s hard to deal
with them in a rational way
Please feel free and ask me any
time. In the meantime, if you are
interested in seeing the status of
these issues, I will send you a
link to board/confluence page .
Someone is
acting
irrationally,
what’s next?
Situation: work is blocked
for known reasons, but they
keep asking when it will be
finished.
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18. Feedback
po-ruski
Straight to the point
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19. Gentle
feedback
Not happy with the result?
• You’ve done some really good work on this. I
have some feedback if you’d like it.
• I really like the angle you took on this. I
think there may be some other considerations
to factor in. Let’s go and spend some time later
today and work on it together
Acknowledge and Appreciate Their
Work Then Give Feedback
“Managing for Happiness” by Jurgen Appelo
is your clue to a good feedback 19

20. Gentle nudge
Someone is sending you something way too late:
• First make sure you gave sufficient context why you
need it by this time.
• Then you can say:
• Hey guys, I appreciate that we all have a lot on right now,
but in my role, I need to manager expectations with
others on your behalf. In the future when there is a
deadline, please push back if you think it’s unrealistic /
just tell me I am being unrealistic.
• Hey guys, I appreciate we all have a lot on right now, but
if we can’t meet the deadline then I will need to inform
the customer/ escalate to management…
• We really needed your feedback by Friday. We are now
delaying our actions for today. When is the earliest you
can get back to us?
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21. Email hacks
– the obvious
• The more formal the relationship, the longer the
emails (but not too long).
• Using emoji can be your brand
• Start with …
• I hope this email finds you well.
• I trust this email finds you well and safe.
• Thanks for reaching out,
• Thanks for bringing me in the loop,
• Thanks for making me aware.
• End with …
• very much looking forward to hearing back from you /
catching up with you.
• Wishing you a lovely evening/weekend
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22. Email hacks
– not so
obvious
• Draw someone's attention to an email
• I am sorry for pushing this email to the top of
your inbox. We need to make a decision and
notify our consumers as soon as possible about
the changes, so that they have time to adjust. It
is an urgent matter and I hope you can help us
with that.
• Just a gentle reminder / nudge. If you wouldn’t
mind having a look at it by the end of the day, it
would be very much appreciated.
• I might have missed it, but I still need your reply
on this. If you have already sent, please
disregard my message J
Schedule an email at 8:59 AM so that it’s on the top of their inbox
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23. Useful Books

24. People I follow
• https://www.instagram.com/olgabrayne
• https://t.me/polinawasonline
• https://www.facebook.com/misha.lagodinsky
• https://www.facebook.com/kovinagorelik
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25. My favorite tools
• https://grammarly.com/
• https://textexpander.com/
• https://manager-tools.com/all-podcasts
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26. Connect
• Instagram: @scratcha
• Telegram: @IWillNameItLater
• LinkedIn: @labkovich
• Facebook: @tatiana.labkovich
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