Vitamin Stree - Censex Whitepaper

© VITAMIN STREE | All Rights Reserved
CENSEX
The Vitamin Stree Sex Survey
2018
CENSEX

WHO ARE WE?
METHODOLOGY AND DEMOGRAPHICS
We are Vitamin Stree, a young, video first content platform that
is in the business of reshaping the narrative for young women in
India. We produce content that is well researched and thoughtfully
narrated. The paper is based on the findings of a sex survey we did
with Urban Millenials in India. We spoke to 2,500 young women and
men to find about their views on sex and sexuality.
We conducted a comprehensive survey online, and 2500 young
Indians responded. The 2500 respondents were between the age of 18
to 35 years. 1632 identified as female and 728 as male, of this group,
a majority identified as heterosexual, 235 identified as bisexual and 66
identified as homosexuals.
The survey was in the form of a questionnaire, where 90% of the
questions were close ended or with multiple choices. 10% were open
ended questions. Secondary sources have also been used in the white
paper, that have been listed at the end.
Development, Censex Survey: Tara Kapur, Advait
Gupt, Akshat Gupt
Survey Team: Nitika Kanodia, Pankhuri Ranjan,
Akshat Gupta, Aanandita Banerjee
Data Analysis: Anuj Hakked, Shreshth Varshney,
Mohit Bhasin
Development & Author, White Paper: Padmini
Vaidyanathan
Design & Graphics, White Paper: Ayesha Punjabi
CONTRIBUTORS

How are young
Indians learning about
sex, where are they
learning about it and
at what age are they
becoming sexually
active?
More women are now
watching porn, than
ever before. But is the
lack of female-centric
porn a turn-off for
many women?
Why are we are
not visiting the
gynaecologist as often
as we should, and is
the onus of sexual
health still only on
women?
Sex is supposed to be
all about pleasure, or
so they say. Where are
young millennials at,
when it comes to sex
and pleasure?
INTRODUCTION
TO SEX
PORN AND
MASTURBATION
SEXUAL HEALTH
GOOD SEX vs
BAD SEX
1 2
4
3
Joining the dots, from
sex education to sexual
health, do all roads
lead to sex, pleasure
and consent?
CONSENT
AND PLEASURE
5

Millennials in India, on their phones, woke & empowered by the
Internet, have broken their silence on sex. An online survey conducted
by Vitamin Stree with young women and men across urban India,
reveals their motivations, drives and beliefs when it comes to sex. And
there is good news and not so good news, especially for young women
when it comes to sex, pleasure and consent.
Vitamin Stree is a young, video first content platform that is focused on reshaping
the narrative for young women in India. This paper is based on the quantitative and
qualitative study of answers given by over 2500 young women and men, who live in
Indian urban cities, have access to the internet and speak English. The survey was
conducted in October 2018, about a month after the historic verdict decriminalising
homosexuality and around the time the MeToo movement hit India.
SETTING THE CONTEXT

The Internet is large, and the effort
to change the narrative for women
in India and across the world, is
not an easy one. It is a constant
evolving challenge and it starts
with creating well researched and
thought-provoking content for her.
It also means taking men along on
this journey. As we learnt through
the survey, having a college degree
and being online is no guarantee
of having the right information
and intention. We at Vitamin Stree
have talked about everything from
birth control and women’s rights to
pubic hair and body positivity. The
findings of this survey has allowed
us to create videos on porn and
masturbation, sexual fantasies,
consent and pleasure for women
and men. To be empowered and
challenge status quo, first requires
the right information to act on. And
that will be a continuous process,
which needs to be in sync with every
generation’s values and ambitions.
What will not change is that women
should always have the same rights
when it comes to sex, pleasure
and consent. Or at least
that’s what Stree said.
The information age is both a good
thing and a bad thing. There is
information out there, but not all
is relevant, up to date or correct. In
an era of fake news and Whatsapp
forwards, unverified claims and
discussions on topics related to
sexuality is a big problem. As
revealed in the survey, majority
of both men and women get
information on sex before the
age of 13, and mostly from peers,
followed by porn. That translates
to misinformation followed by
misrepresentation. And when the
two add up over the years, it leads
to issues around understanding
consent and pleasure. In our survey
for example, several respondents
could not clearly explain consent.
And when it comes to pleasure, the
threshold still remains extremely
low for women (‘no pain’ is what
most women associate with good
sex). It’s not all bad news. Leading
the conversation around archaic
topics like virginity, men and women
argued that virginity was a social
construct and does not apply any
more, especially for the sexual
minorities.
WHAT WE
FOUND
CHANGING THE NORM,
ONE STORY AT A TIME

CHAPTER 1: INTRODUCTION TO SEX
India, the land of Kama Sutra, is ironically, a reluctant participant
when it comes to discussing sex and sexuality. And this is most
evident by how we treat this subject from a young age. That sex has
been a taboo topic for centuries is not a new piece of information.
But, now with the coming of Internet and every kind of information
accessible on our phones, how much longer can we hush all things
sex?

When and how are millennials learning
about sex?
According to our survey, most
respondents learnt about sex before the
age of 13, men a little before women. But
only 9.96% first learnt about sex through
sex-ed classes.
Majority of our respondents said they
learnt about sex from their friends, since
sex education is more or less absent in
the Indian education system. Porn and
the Internet come a close second when
it comes to teaching young people
about sex, with 30% men learning about
sex via the two. Considering 99% of
porn is a gross misrepresentation of sex,
made only from and for the male gaze,
it does not make for a great starting
point. And the Internet is a cesspool of
misinformation, especially if you do not
where to go and what to look for.
LET’S START FROM THE START
Before the age of 13
14- 16 years
16-18 years
What age did you first learn about sex?
45.96%
32.84%
9.10%

We don’t talk about sex in India. But taking
a cue from countries like Netherland,
perhaps we should, soon and often. The
Dutch start really early, teaching and talking
about sexuality to four year olds and then
continuously through high school. The result?
Young people in Netherlands reported better
overall experience with sex and Netherlands
also has one of the lowest rates of teen
pregnancy.
NCERT is now considering adding sex
education to its curriculum for kids from grade
one to grade seven to help curb sex crimes
against young children. While this is a much
needed and a big step forward, there has
been no significant progress to explain sex as
a natural process and definitely no effort to
explain equally important aspects of respect,
pleasure
and consent.
This becomes especially important because
it is not like young Indians are not having sex
just because nobody is telling them about it. In
our survey, almost 50% respondents said they
started having sex between 14 and 18 years of
age, in line with the global trend.
According to an article by Bustle, the average
at which American and European teens are
having sex for the first time is 17 years.
SO, HOW YOUNG IS TOO YOUNG?
Between 20-24 years
Between 14-18 years
What age did you lose your virginity?
50.13%
41.26%

Lack of sex education and
being in the dark about
most basic things ( read
female sexual pleasure and
consent) is alarming, but the
silver lining - a willingness
to reconsider the concept of
virginity. While majority of the
respondents described the
act of losing one’s virginity as
an act of penetration, several
people went on to elucidate
that virginity was just a social
construct and the traditional
definition of penetration only
applied to heterosexuals.
At the risk of repeating
ourselves, Internet is large,
and there is every kind
of information available
there, the good, the bad
and the ugly. On the other
hand, a concerted effort at
starting clear, meaningful
conversations around sex, at
a young age, can help not just
build healthy sexual habits,
but also help address issues
around sex and consent and
pleasure.
“There is nothing such as losing virginity , because the hymen is just
elastic and it can break without sex too”.
“It’s just a term
used by society to
mark the fact that
you’ve had sex”.
“Virginity is a myth. It’s a mental state imposed by societal and religious
pockets to dictate women’s autonomy over their bodies. I don’t believe in it”.
“Absurd. Can’t define.
I understand the
significance of sex
for the first time, in
whatever definition, but
I can’t wrap my head
around ‘losing virginity’”.
“Virginity
is a social
construct”.
SEX EDUCATION
WHAT IS VIRGINITY?

CHAPTER 2: PORN HABITS AND MASTURBATION
“Erotica is about sexuality, but pornography is about power” - Gloria Steinam
Does porn hold the power that is directing the reality and
expectations, when it comes to sex? Porn has been around for a
while, and porn has been mostly associated with men, the making
and the viewing part. But is that changing? If so, why and how? In
this part of our survey, we asked the respondents about their porn
habits, leading into questions around masturbation.

Before we get into the findings of
the survey, where does India stand
on the global porn viewing scale?
India watches porn and a lot of
it. According to data released by
Pornhub, we are the third largest
consumers of porn. And for a good
part, men are the biggest consumers
of porn. In our survey, 91% of men
said they watch porn, with more
than half saying they watched porn
three to four times a week.
Women are also watching, and
increasingly so. 65% of women who
took the survey said that they
watch porn, and at least 34% of
them are watching porn 3 to 4
times a month. And this is on trend
with what’s happening globally.
PornHub revealed that a quarter of
their audience globally, are women.
PORN VIEWING
SCALE IN INDIA
91.23% 64.97%
31.60%
7.40%
MEN WOMEN
Men who watch porn
couple of times a week
HOW OFTEN ARE MEN WATCHING PORN?
ARE YOU WATCHING PORN?
Married men who watch
porn daily
Men who watch porn daily

The growing trend of women watching porn
makes sense. Women can easily access porn,
on their phones, watch in the privacy of their
homes, without anyone getting to know about
it. Something which was not possible for most
women even as recently as a decade ago.
According to the CUT, which analysed ten
years of porn viewing data available, women
world over are now spending more screen
time than men, on porn sites.
WOMEN ARE WATCHING PORN

While more and more women
maybe watching porn, what
remains a problem is lack of
porn made for women. We
asked our respondents to
choose from a pool of adjectives
to describe porn. On a spectrum
ranging from dirty, disgusting
and violent to hot, wonderful
and erotic, a lot of women and
men leaned towards hot and
erotic. But quite a few women
used violent, dirty and disgusting
to describe porn. This is not
surprising, because for years
now, porn has been made by
men, for men, where women
are only seen as pleasure givers.
While there is certainly more
porn being made for women,
and there has also been a rise in
the number of women making
porn, there is still a huge gap
between demand and supply.
HOT
EROTIC
DIRTY
vIOLENT
DISGUSTINGWONDERFUL
ARE WOMEN ENJOYING
PORN?

And speaking of Porn, how can we
leave out the biggest pleasure it
serves - Masturbation.
According to our survey, 99.45%
men have masturbated. And
82% women also said they have
masturbated at least once in their
life.
28.8% women said that they
masturbate 3 to 4 times a week.
1 in 4 men said that they
masturbate at least once a day
MENWOMEN
99.45%
82.11%
0.45%
17.89%
DO YOU MASTURBATE?

Figured it out myself Porn
Internet Friends
While it’s no surprise
and almost a relief, that
millennials are not shying
away from self pleasure, we
asked them how they found
out about masturbation,
given the collective social
silence on anything related
to sex and pleasure. Half
of both men and women,
that’s 50%, said they figured
it out themselves. The rest
was a scattered mix between
friends, Internet, porn
and books. And most people
who took the survey and
were masturbating, found it
to be a pleasurable, natural
and wonderful experience.
But, there were those who
also found masturbating
strange and thought of it as a
taboo.
In fact 15% of all
respondents described
masturbation
as strange or a taboo
HOW DID YOU LEARN ABOUT
MASTURBATION?
MEN WOMEN
50.50%
50.45%
12.6%
29.61%
14.95%
3.86%
15.33%
9.21%

In 1994, Jocelyn Elders, the U.S Surgeon
General (and a woman) was forced to resign
for saying that masturbation should be
taught as a safe sex practice. A concept now
practiced in many countries in Europe. The
UK National Health services, from 2009,
has been actively encouraging teenagers
to masturbate, the pamphlets aptly titled
“An orgasm a day, keeps the doctor
away”. While this may still be considered a
revolutionary idea in India, perhaps it is time
for a sexual revolution. Because women
are masturbating, women are watching
porn, and so are men. What we now
need is clearing the air and declaring that
masturbating is okay, completely natural
and perhaps even required from time to
time. And as far as porn is concerned, there
is definitely nothing wrong with watching
it, but it would do well to remember that
porn in its current form mainly serves
men, is often violent and removed from
reality. So, yes there is definitely a need for
more porn and erotica to be created for
women, perhaps even by women and locally
produced is always nice.
MASTURBATION AS A SAFE SEX
PRACTICE ?

CHAPTER 3: GOOD SEX vs. BAD SEX
Is there anything such as bad sex? Yes, there is. And a lot of people,
especially women are having it.

No orgasm
WOMEN MEN
Let’s start with what is bad
sex? According to our survey,
it is different for men and
women. But like with a lot of
things, women have set really
low levels of expectations for
themselves, when it comes to
sexual pleasure.
According to our survey, 52%
women equate pain with bad
sex. Whereas most men,
40.28% to be precise, equated
it to no foreplay, followed by
a close 34.8% who said they
didn’t like it if the act was over
too quickly . And majority of
both men & women said, that
good sex for them is when the
entire act of having sex
is fulfilling.
WHAT IS BAD SEX?
32.29%
Pain
52.48%
No Foreplay
Quick
40.28%
34.58%

Only 10% of women
said they orgasm
every time they have
sex.
38% of women
said they fake their
orgasms at least
50 % of the time.
BUT WHAT ABOUT
ORGASMS?
It’s still not looking too great
for women, if our survey is
anything to go by. Only 10% of
women said they orgasm every
time they have sex. And 38%
of women said they fake their
orgasms at least 50 % of the
time. But why fake it?

My partner
finished before
me
My partner
did not want to
continue
Too awkward
to tell my
partner that
I had not
finished
To not offend
my partner
Every time a woman fakes an
orgasm, she is training her
partner to normalise exactly
what doesn’t work for her.
Many women also fake an
orgasm, because perhaps they
believe that’s how they should
orgasm, again based on what
they see in popular culture,
read in magazines and watch
in porn.
The negative experiences
that women have around
sex, consent and pleasure
comes down to what women
have been told for centuries.
And according to numerous
studies, women often remain
silent when sex hurts or when
they just don’t feel up to it.
This misconception stems
from years of social construct
that paints women as silent
pleasure givers, with no voice
of their own.
WHY FAKE AN ORGASM ?

For sex to be pleasurable for
everyone, it is important to have
open and honest conversations
about your likes and dislikes
with your partner. So, then is
communication key to good sex?
Probably. And sometimes good
communication includes, talking
about sexual fantasies. When
we asked our respondents, their
fantasies ranged from threesomes,
sex in public to BDSM.
But if communication was that easy,
the number of people, especially
women having good sex, would
have been much higher, than it
is currently. Case in point, 20% of
women respondents said they find
it hard to talk about their fantasies
with their partners.
We’ve said it before and we’ll say it
again. Communication is important
between sexual partners and this
involves talking and listening.
Mutual respect, honesty and being
a little vulnerable, go a long way in
ensuring good sexual experience.
For everyone.
54%
50.2%
36.5%
41.18%
38.64%
20%
Women enjoy
Roleplay
Men enjoy
Threesome
Men and women
enjoy BDSM
Women enjoy
sex in public
Men enjoy
sex in public
Women don’t
discuss their sexual
fantasies with
Partner
MILLENNIALS AND
SEXUAL FANTASIES
* This was a multiple choice question

CHAPTER 4: SEXUAL HEALTH
Sexual Health. Two words that are arguably lowest on the priority
list of sexually active young people. Sexual health remains a huge
concern even in urban India. A casual conversation with young urban
Indians, the first impression is usually that they know enough
about practising safe sex. But when you dive deeper and start talking
details, that’s when you realise how potent the mix of misinformation
and lack of information, really is.

women have taken
an emergency
contraceptive more
than two times a year
men say they
haven’t been to a
doctor even when
they had
a cause
for concern
women said they
haven’t been to a
doctor even when
they had a cause
for concern
women have
taken emergency
contraceptives
EMERGENCY CONTRACPTIVES VISITING THE DOCTOR
63%
16.44% 51%
63%
78% of all respondents
admitted to having had
unprotected sex - the
cause of unwanted
pregnancies, STDs,
abuse of emergency
contraceptives and lots of
stress. It’s not just the dearth
of information, but also
misinformation, that makes
ignoring sexual health more
dangerous. In this battle
between Gynecologist and
Google, the latter is clearly
winning the battle.

GOOGLE IT THEMSELVES
FEARED BEING JUDGED
FEARED THEIR
FAMILY WOULD
FIND OUT
TOO
EXPENSIVE
TO GO TO A
DOCTOR
From lack of access to
doctors to general regressive
mentality of the society,
there are many reasons why
sexually active young Indians
are not taking their health
seriously, putting themselves
and their sexual partners
at risk. For a country with a
large, sexually active group of
people, sexual health needs
to be part of a more active
conversation.
The rare instances where
we talk about sexual health
in India, it is usually in the
context of sexual promiscuity
and binary in nature.
The recent squashing of
section 377 and the MeToo
movement has put us in
a unique position, where
we can open up dialogues
on issues, including sexual
health, that can make a huge
difference on how sex is
perceived and practiced in
India.
WHY ARE THE YOUNG PEOPLE
OF URBAN INDIA, SO SCARED
OF THE DOCTOR?
* This was a multiple choice question

CHAPTER 5: SEX, PLEASURE AND CONSENT
The #MeToo movement, took the Internet and the world by storm and
more importantly finally called out the elephant in the room - Consent.
And this brings us to the final part of our survey - sex, pleasure and
consent. There is no doubt that there is ignorance and to a great extent,
confusion, when it comes to the definition of consent. It is a complex
issue, one that has several layers, each of which needs to be addressed
and talked about. Because sexual consent, irrespective of your sexual
preference, is the basic right of every person, violating that is violating
basic human dignity.

In our survey, 1 in 8
respondents said they lost
their virginity without their
consent. Quite a few talked
about “pressured consent”
and many others talked
about social constructs
changing around sex. And
not necessarily in a good
way, where it is okay to have
sex before marriage, but the
choice often gets dictated by
peer pressure. So, does a yes
always mean a yes and is a
no always a no?
We asked our respondents
to define what consent
meant to them.
“Sometimes say if a guy kisses a girl and
she kisses back, that doesn’t involve
verbal consent or not saying no but it is a
social cue consent so that works for me as
consent”
“Consent is almost synonymous to
Permission but still ambigous given one’s
desire in this case. But mainly permissive
in nature.”
“It needs to be an enthusiastic yes for it to
be consent!”
“Consent can be easily defined in theory,
but much harder to navigate in moments
of intimacy. I would define it as complete
sensitivity, respect and honesty between
two (or many) people engaging in any kind
of intimacy. “
“Consent doesn’t always have to be a
verbal ‘yes’ or ‘no’. Instinct and body
language also plays a massive role in
this.”
“Verbal and non verbal cues. Given by
everyone engaged in the absence of
pressure or manipulation. Not under the
influence of any substances. A positive
expression of one’s desire to engage
in sexual or even non sexual acts with
another person. “
“Clearly defined yess , for each level
being crossed. Just because a kiss is
fine its shouldn’t assumed that it means
more”
WHAT IS CONSENT?

The responses we received are indicative
of the confusion that persists, but where
is all this stemming from? Going back to
the beginning, the lack of sex education
coupled with the taboo status given to
sex, leading into porn which sets wrong
expectations for women and men and
finally completely ignoring one’s sexual
health - there all sorts of wrongs that
needs be corrected, when it comes how
we deal with sex.
Arguably, this multi-layered, confused
narrative around sex has existed for
generations, but a whole generation is
now growing up online. And now more
than ever there is a need to address the
topic of sex and sexuality, starting from
respect, love and empathy.
We asked our respondents what they
thought we, as a country should talk
about, when it comes to sex.
“We need to address EVERYTHING,
because EVERYONE does it”.
“Consent, accepting other people’s
sexual identities and how it’s a
normal act”.
“The whole concept of not talking
about sex but forcing newly weds to
produce babies is something we need
to talk about strongly.”
“Consent. Reporting sexual
misconduct or abuse. Understanding
marital rape”.
“Compulsory Sex education in
primary school”.
“We need to teach our women
the importance of being sexually
confident”.
WHAT DOES INDIA NEED
TO TALK ABOUT?

Both the scrapping of section 377 and the MeToo movement affects a
large number of people in the country, who are both online and offline,
but interestingly, majority of the dialogue, arguments and campaigns,
in both cases happened online, led by a lot of young, inspired women
and members of the LGBTQ community. When we started planning and
developing the survey, our aim was to understand if the age of Internet,
Tinder, hashtag activism and social media had changed perceptions around
sex and pleasure. And even though we had not focussed on harassment,
many women in their responses mentioned sexual harassment they
experienced at different stages in their lives. And that automatically got
translated into how sex, pleasure and consent go hand in hand.
This survey was done with an intention of understanding the views
and attitudes of young, urban India on sex. And it is a mixed bag that
millennials are dealing with. The good news is we are able to initiate
a conversation around it. In our survey, respondents voiced the need
to educate, inform and normalise. They raised issues like marital rape,
consent, sexual harassment, inclusiveness, masturbation, female sexual
pleasure and sexual education. We are in 2019 and if there was ever a time
to start a sexual revolution, that starts at a young age, focuses on respect,
honesty, empathy, vulnerability, safety, consent and love, it is now.
SEX, PLEASURE AND CONSENT

Chapter 1: Introduction to Sex
1. How the Dutch Do Sex Ed
2. The Dutch Don’t Sex-Shame Their Kids
3. The case for starting sex education in kindergarten
https://www.pbs.org/newshour/health/spring-fever
4. NCERT to raise awareness on child sexual abuse
5. NCERT: Teachers asked to sensitize primary
children on sexua ..
6. When Americans First Learned About Sex,
According To A Survey
SECONDARY RESOURCES
Chapter 2: Porn Habits and Masturbation
1. How India’s obsession with porn has evolved since
2016
2. 2018 Year in Review
3. Women Actually Watch More Porn Than Men —
Here’s What It Is We’re Watching
4.The rise of Feminist Porn
5. Why Is Children’s Masturbation Such a Secret?
6.Remember that time when Bill Clinton fired his
surgeon general for encouraging masturbation?
Chapter 3: Good Sex Vs. Bad Sex
1.The female price of male pleasure
2. Why Women Fake Orgasms, According To Science
3. The psychology of orgasms: why faking it today
could ruin your sex life tomorrow
7. The Rise of the Female Voice in Porn: Female
Directors Are Re-Shaping The Industry

DISCLAIMER
Copyright © Keeda Cartel Private Limited (hereinafter referred to as Vitamin Stree) All rights
reserved.
This document is produced by Vitamin Stree to enhance knowledge and promote discussion
of the issues addressed and shall not be considered professional opinion of any type.
No part of this document may be reproduced or copied in any form or by any means
[graphic, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping, or information
retrieval systems] or reproduced on any disc, tape, perforated media or other information
storage device, etc., without the written permission of Vitamin Stree. Breach of this condition
is liable action under the applicable law.

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