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Princes PrimarySession 2 - SEN Parents.pptx
- 2. Review Before we begin © Gazing Limited 2022 2
- 3. Prepare and practice for pressure Key Points: → Moving from Red2Blue is a skill. → The skill involves recognising accepting and choosing between what you can and can’t control. → The more you practice this skill the more likely you will be able to change your response to situations that divert you. → This means you will be more resilient under pressure. → The map just helps you recognise it, talk about it, normalize it The Red2Blue perspective Recognise Accept Choose © Gazing Limited 2022 3
- 4. © Gazing Limited 2022 4
- 5. Self Reflection • Consider the last time you were in the Red • What triggered it? • How did you respond? • How did your response impact your performance? • What could you do next time to avoid you responding like that? © Gazing Limited 2022 5
- 7. Predictable sources of pressure… Predictable responses! © Gazing Limited 2022 7
- 8. Escape EXPECTATIONS SCRUTINY CONSEQUENCES Walking towards pressure AGGRESSIVE PASSIVE ESCAPE Preparing and practising for unhelpful responses © Gazing Limited 2022 8
- 9. Practice Scenario You are in an important boardroom meeting with key stakeholders. The meeting is crucial for a high-profile project you have been leading for months. As you present your well-prepared slides and deliver your pitch, your phone vibrates, indicating an incoming call. Aware of the importance of the meeting, you try to ignore it and continue speaking. But the call persists, and your heart sinks when you sees the caller ID displaying the name of your sons special needs school. Worried that something might be wrong, you excuses yourself from the meeting, apologising to your colleagues, and step outside to answer the call. On the other end of the line, the school counselor explains that your son has caused some trouble in the classroom. He had a meltdown, disrupting the class and even causing some minor injuries to himself and others. The school staff had done their best to manage the situation, but they felt it was necessary to inform you about what had happened. 01: Receiving a call from school Please take a screen shot before you go to breakout room Questions: → What Red Head thoughts could this scenario lead to? → How might those thoughts make you feel and act? → How might that impact other parts of your life? → What might help you shift your attention from Red to Blue? © Gazing Limited 2022 9
- 10. Practice Scenario You are a loving and caring parent of a special needs child named Ethan. Ethan is a nine-year-old boy with autism spectrum disorder who requires specialised attention and support. Each morning, you experience a wave of anxiety as you prepares to leave Ethan at his specialized school. You meticulously organise his backpack, ensuring it contains everything he needs for the day, including communication tools, sensory items, and a detailed schedule of activities. Despite your efforts to create a smooth transition, your mind is filled with worry and a constant fear of the unknown. Arriving at the school, you walk hand in hand with Ethan, observing the hustle and bustle of other parents dropping off their children. The scene is a stark reminder of your son's unique needs and the extra attention he requires. You feel a mixture of pride for Ethan's progress and achievements and an overwhelming sense of responsibility. 02: School mornings Please take a screen shot before you go to breakout room Questions: Relate this scenario to Red2Blue → What indicators are there that this person is having a Red Head? → What impact is this having? → What would you do if this person came to you for help with their mindset and described this scenario? © Gazing Limited 2022 10
- 11. © Gazing Limited 2022 11
- 12. © Gazing Limited 2022 12
- 13. WHAT IF’S TOOL © Gazing Limited 2022 13
- 14. What If’s Tool It is important to plan for the pressures that are likely to come your way and to establish mental routines to help you accept and deal with them. This will help you recognise and accept what's happening rather than fight it and wish it wasn’t happening. It will allow you to free up your mental space to focus on how to adjust and what to do. Breakout Group Exercise What are the top likely diversions you will face? What strategy could you put in place to help you respond from the Blue side? © Gazing Limited 2022 14
- 15. What if’s Exercise You are a dedicated and hardworking mother, with a demanding full-time job as a project manager at a fast-paced tech company. You also has a special needs child named Emily, who is seven years old and requires extra care and attention due to her developmental challenges. Your work environment is highly competitive and demanding, often requiring long hours and tight deadlines. Despite your best efforts, you find yourself constantly struggling to balance your responsibilities as a mother and a professional. Mornings are especially challenging. Getting Emily ready for school requires extra time and patience. Emily has difficulty with routine tasks such as dressing, eating, and tying shoelaces. You have to constantly remind yourself to remain calm and composed during these moments of frustration, as Emily's needs can be overwhelming. Once you drop off Emily at her specialized school, you head straight to work, but your mind remains occupied with thoughts of your daughter throughout the day. You try your best to stay focused, but frequent phone calls from the school or therapists become a constant interruption, pulling your attention away from your projects. At work, you are facing additional pressure and demands from your superiors. The expectations for high performance and timely deliverables weigh heavily on you, leaving little room for personal struggles. You often find yourself staying late at the office, trying to catch up on missed deadlines or preparing for important presentations, sacrificing precious time with your daughter. After work, you frequently attend therapy sessions and consultations for Emily's ongoing developmental needs. These appointments require you to take time off work or juggle your schedule, causing additional stress. Sometimes, you feel guilty about not being able to spend more quality time with Emily or attend school events due to work commitments. Your co-workers, though sympathetic, don't fully understand the challenges you face. The lack of empathy at times adds to your feelings of isolation and frustration. You wish for a more inclusive and supportive work environment that values work-life balance and understands the needs of parents with special needs children. A day in the office Please take a screen shot before you go to breakout room Questions: Relate this scenario to the What If’s tool → What was predictable? → What strategies could have been in place to mitigate/avoid impact on performance? → What mental rituals could help move from Red to Blue when the What If’s happen? © Gazing Limited 2022 15
- 16. Practicing your ‘What if’s’ in advance is more likely to help you rather than just writing them down. This is what it means to use pressure to stimulate your performance. For top performers, pressure rather than being an enemy to performance, is in fact, a stimulant. Practice like you mean it. Practicing What if’s will help with building Mental Strength © Gazing Limited 2022 16
- 17. • How could we really muck this up? • Make a list • Pick your favourites MUC Tool © Gazing Limited 2022 17
- 18. Continue / Review / Personalise your What If’s exercise Homework Exercise © Gazing Limited 2022 18
- 19. Thanks! © Gazing Limited 2022 19
Editor's Notes
- Today, review what we did last session and apply it. We looked at circles and recognition radar, but today we are going to focus on some more tools. Control circles we did to illustrate the skill (recognise, accept, choose).
- Before we begin, any questions about Tuesday that may have popped up over the last few days? First session, all about what is Red2Blue. Can separate that into two different sessions if you want. Then, we look into how we use it, scenario work, tools, applications of Red2Blue in practice.
- Little recap on last session. Started by talking about the line, performance is not all or nothing. We can all get better and improve. Pressure can be a catalyst for performance but can also hinder performance. Performance separated into three different yet equally important factors – structures, skillset and mindset. But mindset bit of a mystery – this gives you one way to talk about it and to practice it. Our view at Gazing is that mindset is a skill that can be practiced and developed. Like any skill, one main component. For mindset, control of attention main component of the skill. What is the skill? Recognise, accept, choose. Map just helps us recognise it and use the language.
- Any questions about the map?. Any general observations about the words that are there? Point at attendants to ask about this Can be a bit overwhelming at first, hence we never put it first. Unfold the story, then show map to put it into context. Child version also useful and simplification. Have you seen the kids version and the advanced map version?
- We asked you about self reflection for homework and consider the last time you were in the Red. Ask everyone to share their stories and answer the questions.
- Ask if anyone has used the Recognition template Elicit thoughts
- Most of the things that you said are predictable, know what might happen. This happens aswell in teams – you know the people in your team, what can make them turn in the red and also their red responses.
- APE is part of another acronym. This acronym helps you identify pressure and where it comes from. Can also call it the sources of pressure. Expectations - Setting a goal or having expectations, This is what I need to achieve or what need teams to achieve. Expect something to be a certain way. If it doesn’t go that way, may slip into the red Scrutiny – refers to scrutiny we place on ourselves or perceived scrutiny from others (coaches, teammates, media…) Consequences – what happens if I don’t perform? To get better, you need these three things. Its good thing! However, it its overwhelming, inconsistent, lots of the time unpredictable, we usually see some of the following three responses: We may become aggressive (not necessarily physical aggression, can be verbal and dismissive too) We may become passive – having a bit of a meltdown, poor me, don’t want to be there, blaming others, feeling lethargic Or we may want to escape – want the game/meeting to finish, want to hide This is just a pattern and help you to observe and what was the trigger? What source of pressure did make you slip into the red? And what behaviour does it usually lead to? Recognition radar. What's the value of APE? We know that different people need different things. Cant use same procedures for aggressive to escape – individual or team red heads may differ and identifying that early will allow us to provide the right sessions.
- If we go back to the line, we are trying to get a bit of perspective of what has happened in this case.
- This tool is designed to help us prepare ….to help us practice If we can anticipate what might happen we can resource ourselves to cope with it, to do well in that context Its not just about having a contingency plan….its about getting used to the feeling – the mindset skill – what red thoughts will happen, what techniques, processes, rituals can help me stay or get Blue? Exercise = 20 minutes total Breakout = 20 minutes total New groups of 4 auto-generated or same groups Facilitators must be able to visit rooms Debrief: 15 minutes in main room Discuss example what if’s from each group – can share some examples from Gazing’s work
- What has changed since Covid? People better skills and structures to do this. However, lots of things that they could have done to stay in the blue. Question is, do they have a tool in the moment that they can use to move back into the Blue? What could you do in the moment? Remember, these are just some examples of some scenarios. You can create your own for practice or make them specific to the client you are working with. More scenarios will be uploaded to the new digital platform too.
- Debrief the point of what if’s…and that the next step is to actually practice them
- Another route/angle to addressing pressure in advance is to use the screw up cascade. E.G How can you deliver the worse sales pitch in the world? How would we really screw up ….. Making a list is usually easy! And can be a bit of fun. The key though and the big insight is to honestly reflect on the aspects (usually top 3) that YOU actually do. Once this is clear you can focus on strategies to address each aspect There are other tools, but to get started, these are simple easy to use tools to get started addressing pressure head on
- Slide timing – 1 minutes; total timing – 1 hour 29 minutes We would recommend doing What if’s on a regular basis The next session will look at how you can practice Red2Blue with others
- What happens next? Call next week about 1:1 and how you tell that story. Lesson plan in the digital platform. Don’t worry about the style of delivery, main thing is that you tell the story.