Online Unit 7. Completing Business Msg.pptx

Diploma in Management Studies
Business Communication BUS107
Session 7 - Completing Business Messages
1. Revising to improve readability
2. Editing for clarity and conciseness
3. Proofreading your message
4. Distributing your message
ReferenceText: Module Book Session 7
1

Learning Outcomes
After this lecture, students should be able to:
Describe steps to revise and evaluate first drafts and work
done by others.
Describe techniques to improve the readability of
messages.
Write clearly and concisely.
Describe principles of effective design of documents.
Explain the importance of and steps in proofreading.
Explain how to distribute messages.
2

Completing Business Messages
3
Improve Readability
Revising to make it easier to read

4
Improve Readability
Four Powerful techniques:
1. Vary sentence length
2. Keep paragraph short
3. Use lists and bullets to clarify & emphasize
4. Add headings and subheadings

5
Improve Readability
Use Lists and Bullets
Idea Sequence
Visual Impact
ComplexTopics
Main Points
Skimming
Audience

6
Improve Readability
Use Lists and Bullets
Owning your own business has 3 main
advantages.One is the opportunity to build your
financial assets. Another is the satisfaction of
working for yourself. As a sole proprietor, you
also have the privacy of not having to reveal your
financial information to anyone.

7
Improve Readability
Use List and Bullets
Owning your own business has 3 advantages:
• The opportunity to build your financial assets
• The satisfaction of working for yourself
• The privacy of not having to reveal your financial
information

8
Improve Readability
Use Headings & Subheadings
Descriptive Informative
Basic Organization
Important Points
Links andTransitions

9
Improve Readability
Headings and subheadings are helpful in three important
ways:
1. Show audience at a glance how the material is
organized,
2. Call attention to important points, and
3. Highlight connections and transitions between ideas.

10
Improve Readability
There are two ways of writing headings and subheadings.
1. Descriptive headings, such as “Cost Consideration”, simply
identify a topic without suggesting anything more.
2. Informative headings, such as “Redesigning Material Flow to
Cut Production Cost” offer the audience the context of the
message and may indicate conclusion or recommendations of
that particular section.

11
Improve Readability
• Well-written headings are informative and self-contained,
which means audience can skim through and understand
without going into the details of the document.
• In generally, Informative headings are more helpful than
descriptive headings.
• But whatever types of headings is selected, it is necessary to
keep it brief and grammatically parallel.

12
Improve Readability
• It should be self-
contained
– i.e. readers could
skim through
• Keep them brief
• Grammatically parallel

13
Edit for Clarity & Conciseness
Clarity
Reader understands the meaning of your
message without reading more than once.
Conciseness
To reduce the length / unnecessary words so that
reading is faster

14
Edit for Clarity
• Break up overly long sentences
• Rewrite hedging sentences
• Impose parallelism
• Clarify awkward references
• Reword long noun sequence
• Correct dangling modifiers
• Replace camouflaged verbs
• Clarify sentence structure

15
Edit for Clarity - Example
Reword long noun sequences
Having too many nouns together as modifiers
makes it difficult to read.
[Edit]
The aluminum window sash installation company
will contact us.
The company that installs aluminum window
sashes will contact us.

16
Replace camouflaged verbs
• Watch for word endings like –ion, -ing, -ment, -ant, -
ence
• They ‘hide’ verbs by changing them into nouns or
adjectives
• Causing you to use another unnecessary verb
[Edit]
Checking of the sales orders occurs daily.
Sales orders are checked daily.

17
Replace camouflaged verbs
• Watch for word endings like –ion, -ing, -ment, -ant, -
ence
• They ‘hide’ verbs by changing them into nouns or
adjectives
• Causing you to use another unnecessary verb
[Edit]
Checking of the sales orders occurs daily.
Sales orders are checked daily.

18
Clarify sentence structure
• Keep the subject and predicate close
• Keep the modifiers (and the words they are suppose to
modify) close
[Edit]
A 10% decline in market share caused by an aggressive sales
campaign by Nike, the market leader, was the major problem.
A 10% decline in market share was the major problem. It was
caused by an aggressive sales campaign by Nike, the market
leader.

19
Clarify sentence structure
• Keep the subject and predicate close
• Keep the modifiers (and the words they are suppose to
modify) close
[Edit]
These chairs are suitable for those who spend long hours in front of
their computers with their adjustable features.
With their adjustable features, these chairs are suitable for those
who …

20
Edit for Conciseness
UnneededWords
and Sentences
LongWords
or Phrases
Redundant
Combinations
“It is/There are
Starters”

21
Wordy Phrase Concise Phrases
adequate number of enough
as a matter of fact in fact
at the present time now
by means of by
due to the fact that because
for the purpose of for
in a timely manner on time
in spite of the fact that despite
over the duration of during
take into consideration consider
until such time as until

22
Unneeded Words and Sentences
Concise Phrase
For
If
On
Before
Soon
About or Regarding
Wordy Phrase
For the sum of
In the event that
On the occasion of
Prior to the start of
In the near future
With reference to

23
Careful use of relative pronouns (who, that, which)
Items that are sold after January 2013 will have no
warranty.
The manager told the directors last week THAT
the details were changed.

24
If you want to be successful in your career, you
must work hard.
To be successful in your career, you must work hard.
The employer increased wages so that she could
improve morale.
The employer increased wages to improve morale.

25
Redundant Combination
Absolutely complete
Basic fundamentals
Follows after
Reduce down
Refer back
Collect together
Complete
Fundamentals or Basic
Follows
Reduce
Refer
Collect

26
Redundant Combination
RepeatAgain
ActualTruth
Future Plans
Return Back
Surrounded on all sides
Repeat
Truth
Plans
Return
Surrounded

27
“It is /There are” Starters
It would be appreciated if you sign the lease
today.
Please sign the lease today.
There are 5 employees who were late for work
today.
5 employees were late for work today.

28
Produce the Message
Design for Readability
Consistency Balance
Restraint
Detail

29
Produce the Message
Design for Readability
Margins, typeface,
spacing, color
Too formal, just right
too casual
Go for simplicity
Wide columns are
more difficult to
read

30
Produce the Message
Document Design
•White Space
•Margins
•Justification
•Typefaces
•Type Styles

31
Produce the Message
Document Justification

32
Proofread Documents
“Fresh Eyes”
Your review
Look for:
• Inconsistencies, errors and missing parts
• Check your visuals as well
Why get someone else to check it?

33
Distribute Documents
• Cost Concerns
• Convenience
• Time Constraints
• Security
• Privacy

34
Distribute Documents
Physical Web-Based
Electronic

Tutorial Questions
This section covers the 28 review questions in the SIM Module Book
Business Communication (BUS 107) Session 7, page 112-116.
Comprises:
• 10 Multiple Choice Questions and;
• 14 Short sentence writing practice;
• 4 short structured questions
35

Online Unit 7. Completing Business Msg.pptx

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