A document presentation of an article dealing with some improper habits of some people. For reflection. Texts in English. For the benefit of both the young and old.

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REFLECTIONS

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In my life I have come across a number of people
who have very peculiar bad habits like blinking
their eyes, playing with their hair, pulling some
of their fingers and so on when they are talking
with another person face to face. Such habits can
be very distracting and irritating to the people
they are talking with.
I remember vividly three people who had rather
distracting habits. I shall refer to them with
fictitious names in order to protect their identity.
When I was in lower secondary school, I had a
teacher, a Mr Wong Pak Leng with a very odd
habit. He was then in his early thirties and was a
very dedicated teacher. He was the no-nonsense
type of teacher and he carried out all his duties
and responsibilities very well.
Mr Wong had this habit which was quite amusing
and perhaps distracting to any person he talked
to. He could not maintain eye contact with the
person he was talking to and he would move one
of his shoulders in an up and down motion every
minute or so.

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Onlookers found this habit extremely funny.
Some thought that he was suffering from some
physical affliction like a muscular disorder or
some trouble with the nerves around his shoulder
area. However we learnt that Mr Wong, a very
healthy and fit person had no medical problem
whatsoever with either his muscles or nerves. It
was most likely a case of a peculiar habit picked
up when he was young and this habit stayed with
him.
In the 1980s when I was still in the teaching
service, I had a colleague in school, whom I shall
refer to as Kuppusamy. He was a good friend and
had many good qualities. He was polite, diligent,
responsible, systematic and careful in his work.
We used to have good conversations in the
staffroom and we were both in the same
department.
Kuppusamy had the habit of shaking his legs
virtually non-stop whenever he was sitting on a
chair. This bodily motion of his was not only
done when he was sitting alone but also when he
was seated and talking to others.

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I used to wonder whether it was a body language
that showed impatience and restlessness. I did not
think that it was a medical condition.
Oftentimes during school assemblies,
Kuppusamy would choose to sit next to me. The
teachers were all seated on the stage of the school
hall while the students had to stand or sometimes
sit on the floor. Many of the school assemblies
would drag on for more than half an hour. The
national and school anthems would be played and
then the teacher on duty the previous week would
give his or her report. This was then followed by
the headmaster’s long speech and ‘lecture’. Most
of the teachers dreaded this. Some would
daydream while others would doze off.
Kuppusamy, seated next to me would start
shaking his legs. As all the chairs were all
connected or linked up in a row, I had to ‘suffer’
the effects of the shaking leg movements of
Kuppusamy. Sometimes I would feel my body
trembling with the movement of my seat due to
the leg motions of Kuppusamy.
Other times, I felt dizziness in my head.

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I tried sometimes to tell Kuppusamy politely in
various ways:
“Are your legs having some pain or itchiness?”
“We are having tremors on the stage.”
“Don’t your legs get tired with the constant
movements?”
“ Are you bored and restless with the
headmaster’s ‘Blah, blah, blah?’ ”
Kuppusamy would say, “Oh so sorry!”. He would
then stop shaking his legs but hardly a minute
passed before he would start the whole thing
again. It was in a way quite exasperating. What
could I do? I tried to stop my suffering this way:
During the school assemblies, I would
deliberately wait for Kuppusamy to find his seat
first. Then I would choose a seat not on the same
row as his!
Tan Tit Toh was a student in my Form 6
community class way back in the 1990s. He was
a school prefect, quite intelligent and good
looking too. He had many good qualities as a leader
and was a very helpful and responsible student.

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During my classes he would usually sit in the
third row and so I could see him quite clearly.
Tit Toh had this habit of having a ball point pen
between his forefinger and middle finger and
twirling the pen continuously for the whole
period of the lesson. It was rather distracting
whenever my eyes fell upon him during the
lesson. I told him a couple of times, “Tit Toh, you
are a good and well-behaved student but you
have this peculiar habit of playing with your ball
point pen. Do you know that this action can be
quite distracting to the teacher?” “Sorry sir,” he
would reply and immediately stop this playing
with the pen. But it was not long before Tit Toh
would start the bad habit all over again. I had said
to him, “Tit Toh, you’d better try to stop this
habit of playing with your pen. Imagine one day
when you are a manager or a CEO of a big
company and you are conducting a board
meeting. You are the chairman sitting in front of
the meeting table and the rest of your staff
members are having their eyes on you.

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As you conduct the meeting you play with your
pen. Would that give a good impression to
others? It would not for sure.”
Tit Toh had replied, “What you say is very true,
sir. I must stop this habit.”
Unfortunately, Tit Toh could not break this habit
of his all throughout the year he had lessons with
me. I gathered that he had been doing this sort of
thing ever since he was in the lower secondary
form and no teacher or others had tried to help
him correct this habit. I could only hope he would
one day break this distracting habit.
Reflections
* One should be very careful not to pick up
any bad habit especially from a young age
because habits once ingrained can be very
hard to break.
* Parents and teachers should be alert and
help the young ones get rid of any bad
habits they might have.
* Mindfulness of all things happening
whether at the physical or mental level, is a
very important quality of the mind to
develop.
* Have the determination, mindfulness and
perseverance to cut off one’s bad habits
and mannerisms.