This document describes the author's blended family and their family dynamics. It discusses how they are a close family but each member deals differently with their mother's breast cancer diagnosis. The family uses humor as a coping mechanism. It also provides descriptions of family roles and traditions. The author defines family as those who love you unconditionally and are always there to support you.

1. By Mel Gagnon

2. “Families have been described according to blood ties
and legal ties, as networks of persons who live together
over periods of time supporting each other, and as
groups of people who have ties of marriage and
kinship to one another” (Galvin, Bylund, Brommel, p.
4).

3. To most people my family
would be considered
blended, although I don’t
really see it like that. It’s
technically “blended”
because my brother is
actually my half brother,
from my father’s previous
marriage, but I’ve always seen
him as simply my brother.

4. Cohesive – Family members strive for emotional closeness,
loyalty, and togetherness with emphasis on some individuality.
In my family, we can talk about anything, yet we tend not to,
even though we know we can. We’re a close family, but some of
us keep more to ourselves when it comes to serious topics.
Recently my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer, which
has put this weird feeling among the family. My mom has no
problem talking about it. My dad hasn’t said a word to me about
it, my sister and I pretend it’s not happening, and my brother
tries to be the supporter. We all have different levels of what
we’re comfortable with discussing. I talk more about it with my
friends, even though I know my families there.

5. My families image would be a dog. A dog symbolizes,
“a mans best friend.” You can always rely on your dog,
and I can always rely on my family. No matter what the
situation, we’re all there for each other in different
ways. Pictured below is me with our two dogs, Comet
and Clover.

6. When I was younger, we
would go to the coast and
beach every year and go on
vacation at least once a year.
A big tradition is the
holidays. Thanksgiving and
Christmas day are always at
my house and the whole
family comes over. On
Christmas Eve we go to
Grandma’s, Pepere’s, and
Memere’s – same order,
same time, every year.

7. Humor is a huge part of my family.
My brother and I are the
comedians, although everyone has
a great sense of humor. Our most
memorable moments are when we
sit at the dinner table and share
hilarious things that happened to
us that day. The day after we heard
mom has breast cancer, we started
making jokes. It’s our way of
coping, trying not to think about
how serious it really is. Over the
years I’ve kept a Gagnon family
quote book, filling it with funny
things that happened/were said,
so we can always remember them.

8. Dad – provides main income,
does outside chores. More apt to
share feelings with Matt, than
Rach or I. Go to him for advice on
big purchases, such as cars.
Mom – Second source of income.
Cooks and cleans, takes care of pets
during the day. The one you get
advice from about every day things.
Knows about our social lives and
what we’re up to. Has the most power
in the house. Makes most decisions,
but discusses it with dad depending
on how big it is. Usually wins fights.

9. Matt – Brother/son. The oldest. The big shot, very
successful, favored among our grandmother. The comforter
among the siblings. Puts dad in his place when need be.
Rachel – Sister/daughter. Second oldest. Getting a degree
in Library Sciences. Very level headed, the smart one,
responsible. I’m more apt to tell her things because we’re
closer in age and Matt lives in Texas.
Me – Sister/daughter. Youngest. I’m the spoiled one,
the one who got away with the most. I’m more apt to
speak up to my parents than Rachel. The sarcastic one.
Family photographer/historian

10.  According to Hochschild’s marital ideology role types, my
parents would be considered transitional. “The transitional
husband and wife see the wife’s identity as the provider.
The wife identifies with home management as a role,
although she also wishes to identify with her work.
Transitional husbands don’t mind that their wives work,
but also expect them to take most of the home
responsibility” (Galvin, Bylund, Brommel, p.171). My father
is the main provider in my house. My mother works at
home with her own business on Ebay. When my siblings
and I were babies, my mother would stay home with us all
day and work nights when my father got home.

11.  I define family as the group
of people in your life that
love you unconditionally no
matter what and who are
always there for you. To me,
family doesn’t have to be
blood related. My friends
are just as easily a part of my
family as much as say, my
sister. Family is what/who
you want it to be.

12.  Galvin, K.M., Bylund, C.L., & Brommel, B.J. (2012).
Family Communication and Change. Indianapolis:
Allyn and Bacon.