The poem explores the growing generational gap between a father and son. As the son grows older, the father feels he no longer understands his child, as they lived separately during the son's development. They now speak as strangers with no understanding between them. Though the father wanted to shape the son, he cannot share in what his son loves. In the end, they reconcile but the generation gap remains unresolved.

2. Father to Son
by
Elizabeth Jennings

4. Poem & Explanation
I do not understand this child
Though we have lived together now
In the same house for years. I know
Nothing of him, so try to build
Up a relationship from how
He was when small.

5. • In this first stanza of the poem, Father to Son by Elizabeth
Jennings, the poet shows father saying that he has not
succeeded in understanding his son because, he himself
could not grow up with his son. This might be because when
the son was growing differently, the father might have been
busy in his chores, and would have kept himself aloof from
the changes taking place in the outer world.
• The narrow-mindedness of the father might have stopped
him to understand the changes his son would have been
experiencing. But now, the father, having failed to
comprehend the height of his son’s emotional growth, is
making attempt to understand him as a child instead of
trying to know the changed world wherein his son is
growing up.
• However, the type of relationship the father now wants to
develop with his son will do more harms than any good for
the father will always think that his son is still a little child
and is so far not in such a condition when he is able to
understand his actual person.

6. Yet have I killed
The seed I spent or sown it where
The land is his and none of mine?
We speak like strangers, there's no sign
Of understanding in the air.

7. • Let’s face it; every father wants to design his child as per his own
wish and desire, but it goes astray, and becomes what he wants
to. Similarly, in this second, the father thinks that when he grew
the seed of his son, he expected him to grow and take branches
under his shade but now when he has fully grown up it seems
that all his expectations from his son are in vain.
• Whatever attempts he made, and whatever pains and
protections he took and gave his son while he was growing are
now in vain because, he now wants to design his life according to
his own ways, and does not expect his father to do any kind of
interference in his life. This is really a very pathetic situation for
gardener-like-father, who made all possible attempts to help his
child grow under his shade, but he now feels to be left behind
because of the generation gap that has come about with the
changing world.
• The poet says that the father and son now behave like strangers
in their own house, and it is hardly possible that they would ever
be able to understand each other. The land that once used to
belong to the father is now all for the son, who wants to walk,
talk and live in his own way. There is almost nil sign of
understanding between both of them.

8. This child is built to my design
Yet what he loves I cannot share.
Silence surrounds us

9. • In this stanza, the poet shows the self-centeredness of the father, who
though wishes to design his son’s life according to his own, when it
comes sharing what his son likes and feels pleasure in, he avoid
revealing it. Where he once used to think that his son would not be
able to design his life, but it is time to talk about his son’s preferences
he feels ashamed of revealing them.
• Here, “what he loves” may mean to the things, trends and people that
his son loves, and when he says: “I cannot share” it may mean a lot.
Yes, it could either be the bad things or good things of his child or the
self-centredness of the father who has now developed a kind of anger
or hatred towards what his son likes.
• I am really amazed to read this stanza and when I compare it with the
previous stanzas, it makes me think about the father what he was
thinking earlier and what he is now doing when it comes to speaking
good things about his son. This stanza also surprises me when “Silence
surrounds us”.
• How could you avoid talking about the seed that you planted with
much care and cautiousness? Reading through this stanza, it can be
realised that all concerns and worries that the father was showing was
nothing but affectation of love towards his son.

10. I would have
Him prodigal, returning to
His father's house, the home he knew,
Rather than see him make and move
His world. I would forgive him too,
Shaping from sorrow a new love.

11. • This stanza presents the very different character of the father. Here, the
father is shown in very callous form, which is not expected from any father
on this earth. I am really surprised to see what the father was in the first
and second stanza, and how he has become in this stanza. Let’s face it; no
father in his senses would ever wish his son to go away from him and
destroy his life.
• Why would a father want his so to get lost and struggle for life? But this is
the father who wishes so. He wishes that his son should go away from him
and return like the prodigal son in the Bible. This sort of callousness of the
father towards his son shows that he never loved his son. However, if we
take this stanza in other way round, it will come to our knowledge that the
father wishes his son to live and struggle so that his child can learn about
the bitterness of his life, and become matured after having encountered
the ups and downs of life.
• He wants his son to return like a matured man full of experiences. This
wish of the father may also be because of the tenderness and innocence
that his child is going through. Anyway, whatever be the reason, the father
wishes so he must stand by his child through thick and thin and help him
know about the life though most of the things are known by the human
beings itself. But if you can share your experience with your child, it not
only helps him go ahead in his/her life, but also let me take a wise decision
when it comes to any hardship in life. However, we must know that to err
is human.

12. Father and son, we both must live
On the same globe and the same land.
He speaks: I cannot understand
Myself, why anger grows from grief.
We each put out an empty hand,
Longing for something to forgive.

13. • In this last stanza of the poem, the poet doesn’t present
what is expected from it. It does talk about the
reconciliation, but doesn’t give any permanent solution.
The father is shown and left lamenting and complaining,
but doesn’t want to provide any solution.
• Similarly the son is shown to be ready to reconcile and live
again as they used to live earlier. But this does not end the
problem of generation gap that remains between the
father and son. Therefore, as a sign of reconciliation, each
of them welcomes one another to live friendly.
• Some readers may deject and resent on this reconciliation
solution, but according to me, there is hardly any solution
to the generation gap. There has always been generation
gap, and it will be so for future generation. The only thing
we can do is to understand the feelings of each other and
line of respect must not be crossed and forgotten.